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/3 September 1999

ECW on TNN by Chris Palacios

3.9.99

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First off, I would like to apologize for the delay in getting the report for the September 3rd ECW on TNN show up. I was in New York attending the wedding of my good friend Hisaharu Tanabe and his lovely new wife Chikako. I may enjoy ECW, but Hisaharu will always come first in my book.

This week's show opens with Taz making his way to the ring for an ECW World title defense against Yoshihiro Tajiri. Jack Victory and Steve Corino join Tajiri at ringside. The match starts quickly, with Taz hitting a clothesline and Tajiri responding with a handspring elbow off of the ropes. Tajiri attempts the tarantula, but Taz quickly grabs Tajiri's legs and counters with a whipping spinebuster slam. Tajiri is able to get some of his lethal kicks to land on Taz, but the champ responds with a head-and-arm Tazplex. Taz follows up with a high cradle Tazplex and a few vicious looking forearm crossface blows. Tajiri makes a last ditch effort with a low blow, a nasty kick to Taz's head, and a drop kick to a seated Taz, but only gets a 2 count. Tajiri tries another kick, but Taz ducks and locks on the Tazmission, which draws a quick tap out from Tajiri. The opening credits roll after the end of a very short and fairly entertaining World title match.

After the show's open is finished, we see Joey Styles in the middle of the ring. Joey gets the guaranteed pop by announcing the show is in front of the Madhouse of Extreme in Queens, New York. A "TNN" chant starts up, followed by a "NYC" chant. Joel Gertner interrupts Joey to declare himself the new commentator of the ECW/TNN show and manages to sneak his "I'm like Rubik's Cube...the more you play with it, the harder it gets" past the TNN quality control staff. After Joey makes a comment about wanting a handle so he can carry Joel, Jerry Lynn makes his way to the ring. Jerry starts by saying that ECW will show the difference between what they do and what the Monday night shows produce, then calls out Rob Van Dam and demands a World TV title shot. Bill Alfonso comes out to refuse Lynn's request, Lynn attacks Alfonso, Van Dam runs out to attack Lynn, and referees seperate Lynn and Van Dam as we head to commercial.

Insert "Anarchy Rulz" PPV ad and Hardcore Hotline ad here. (Who took Eric Bischoff's offer to leave WCW? Find out on the hotline!)

We return to find Buh Buh Ray and D-Von Dudley in the ring as Gertner announces that this is the last night in ECW for the Dudley Boyz, who are heading to the WWF. We find out that Jerry Lynn and Rob Van Dam will meet in next week's TNN main event before Joey goes into his "plug our house shows/merchandise/magazine/web site" section of the show. Balls Mahoney and Spike Dudley make their way to the ring as we head to commercial.

Both teams are trading fists upon the show's return, and Spike lands a hurracanrana on Buh Buh to get the offense going. The Dudleys scramble outside the ring, only to be met by a flying Spike courtesy of a Balls press slam. Back in the ring, Spike lands a bulldog on Buh Buh, but fails to keep the momentum as Buh Buh turns a full nelson into an "atomic drop Buh Buh bomb" of sorts. Buh Buh then drops Spike's neck onto the guardrail, which leads to Spike somehow bleeding. Buh Buh heads up to the second turnbuckle, but Spike quickly recovers and hits a low blow. Spike then attempts a move only to be countered with a nasty 2nd rope sit-out powerbomb by Buh Buh...commercial time!

Back in Queens, Spike lands the Acid Drop spinning bulldog while Balls hits the Nutcracker Suite for 2 counts. Buh Buh quickly recovers and lifts Spike up for a backdrop, then changes course and dumps Spike outside of the ring and through a table. Balls is able to fend for himself with chairshots onto both Dudleys, then brings a table into the ring and dumps a bag of thumbtacks onto the table. Balls attempts to powerbomb Buh Buh through the tacky table, but a D-Von chairshot allows the Dudleys to powerbomb Balls through the table. Spike makes the save, but immediately falls victim to the Dudley Death Drop. On the last night of their stay in ECW, we have NEW ECW World tag team champions in the Dudley Boyz. Joey is stressing the now imminent chance that the Dudleys will lay the ECW tag titles at the feet of Vince McMahon in what is the scariest moment in the history of ECW...but not scary enough to push those house shows and magazines!

Rob Zombie pops up on my television screen to introduce his song "El Phantasmo" from the ECW Extreme Music CD. The video mixes clips of Rob in concert with Lance Storm and Dawn Marie in action. By the way, the song is Lance's theme music, so there is a point to the video. And, as usual, Justin Credible has to plug his annoying painful tagline at the end of the video. Now that's not just the weakest...that's not just the worst...it's Justin Escapable.

Back to Joey and Joel, who plug Roller Jam on TNN by insinuating that a cousin of Joey's skates for the Nevada Hot Dice. Joey cuts off the plug quickly by noting that the Dudleys are on their way to the ring! This naturally leads us to...

Insert "Anarchy Rulz" PPV ad and Hardcore Hotline ad here. (How long until Steve Austin returns to active competition? And what's up with all of the Kevin Nash commercials during ECW on TNN?)

Back in the ring, Buh Buh Ray Dudley notes that boys become men and men become heroes in ECW. However, heroes become legends and legends become gods in the WWF, and Buh Buh states that if God were a heel, he'd be a Dudley Boy. Great line there, Buh Buh, who then states that before leaving for the true hardcore city of Stamford, the Dudleys are going to suck out the soul, guts, and backbone of ECW, which leads to Buh Buh calling out Tommy Dreamer. While Buh Buh notes that Tommy Dreamer literally broke his back for ECW, clips of the Dudleys winning the tag titles over the years are shown. Paul Heyman and Francine are out to keep Dreamer from getting into the ring with the Dudleys while Buh Buh notes that a "2 dollar whore" just showed up. The Dudleys threaten to toss the ECW tag titles down on WWF television while clips of Dreamer taking punishment over the past few years is shown. (Hey, isn't that Raven next to a crucified Dreamer?) Buh Buh then insinuates that he and D-Von visited former Dreamer girl Beulah McGillicutty in more ways than one while clips of the history between Raven, Dreamer, Beulah, and the Dudleys breaking Beulah's next with 3D are shown. Dreamer can't take it anymore and hits the ring, landing a double Russian leg sweep on the Dudleys. As Dreamer lands some low blows with an unidentified object, Francine tosses a ladder into the ring. As the ladder leans on the top rope, Dreamer hits one end of the ladder, making it "teeter totter" and smack both Dudleys with the other end. Outside of the ring, Francine knocks out Sign Guy Dudley with one of his own signboards. Back in the ring, Buh Buh is whipped into the corner, where the ladder is resting on the middle rope. Dreamer then whips D-Von into Buh Buh, which leads to D-Von falling onto his back and Buh Buh falling head first into D-Von's Little D-Von. Dreamer tries to whip Buh Buh into the corner again, but Buh Buh reverses and Dreamer takes the ladder into his back Buh Buh follows it up with a nasty backdrop driver, then starts whipping a face-down Dreamer with his belt. Sign Guy tries to stop Buh Buh apparently from going "too far" with the attack, but Buh Buh pushes Sign Guy off. The Dudleys set up for 3D, but Dreamer is able to counter it by catching D-Von in a DDT. Then, from out of the blue, Raven runs in and hits the Evenflow DDT on Buh Buh. The 3 count happens and the crowd pops huge as we once again have NEW ECW World tag team champions in Raven and Tommy Dreamer. Raven, making his Jesus Christ pose (thanks, Soundgarden), is visibly smiling as the crowd chants his name. A stunned Dreamer is on his knees and turns around, only to have Raven shove a tag title belt into his hands. A "welcome back" chant starts as tension appears on the face of Dreamer, who wins his first World title thanks to his most bitter enemy. Raven ducks out of the ring and climbs into the front row, where he is mobbed by fans. A closeup of Raven's face closes the show.

And so ends the first ECW show on TNN that came from a TV taping. You'd think Eric Bischoff would have been smart enough to realize that Raven's value in ECW is far more than it is in WCW, so why would you give a competitor such a value for free?

The ratings for ECW on TNN aren't exactly making Bischoff's decision look bad, but it's still early and Thunder is still a bad weekly show...

Christopher G. Palacios
[slash] wrestling

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