THE GOOD, BAD, AND UGLY FOR 10/16/2000

Through thick and thin, hellfire and brimstone, over the river and through the woods, I am here to spend four hours of my week typing frantically on a laptop as I watch Monday night wrestling on TNT and TNN. Michaelangelo's the name, GBU's my game. Actually, my game is Everquest, but Cyan Indigo is playing now so I may as well watch wrestling.

What's happening tonight? Well WCW is LIVE (on tape) from Melbourne, Australia and promises some hot matches. I have not read the spoilers, as they might skew my perception of the show as a whole, but expect to see Goldberg, Booker T, and Sting beating on Papa Pump, Shane Douglas, and Jeff Jarrett throughout the evening, or vice versa.

Over at the WWF, it's all about he Samoans, baby. Rocky will likely fend off Kurt Angle and his newest protégé, Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley, while Rikishi runs for his big assed life as Stone Cold Bears down on him with a can of whoop ass that is just dying to be opened. I am sure we will see more on the HHH/Benoit feud, and folks, that's where all my attention is gonna be focused.

Just a side note, I don't care what the critics say, Meet the Parents is a God awful film! Honestly, Ben Stiller's character could have had it so much easier if he had just kept his mouth shut and his eyes and ears open. Instead he manages to screw up at every opportunity by constantly doing the opposite of what DeNiro tells him to do.. I love Bobby D. as much as the next Italian-American, but let me tell you, this movie really pissed me off.

Anyway, the time is drawing near for the sports entertainment to begin. Meet me at the closer after the shows are over!

The Good, Bad, and Ugly for Monday, October 16, 2000

WCW MONDAY NITRO

GOOD: Another packed house. The guys must love this.

BAD: Hope they don't get used to it. Once they come back to the states, it's back to half-full minor venues again.

GOOD: A rematch between Boogie Knights and the NBT. Last week I had no complaints about the work these four guys did.

BAD: I have no idea what Alex Wright just said.

GOOD: Disco's assurance that there will be no screwjob at the end of this match.

BAD: The fact that I do not believe that it will really come to pass. Well, perhaps we can at least hope to avoid the Dusty finish.

INTERESTING: Alex Wright poses for the crowd and draws back major boos. Which is the face team here?

GOOD: Sweet top rope frankensteiner by Jindrack on Disco. It was textbook.

WOW: A monster ref bump. That kick hit him dead in the face.

BAD: This is gonna lead to a screwjob ending for sure.

BAD: Yep, there's Kronik with the run-in. 

BAD: Tony calls Sanders "Mark." Is Madden getting to him?

RANT: Nash claims to be "hung over like a big dog" and asks that Sanders not book him tonight. Is that slang for "too lazy to bother"? Funny thing is that I hear that WCW did not want to send Nash there because the expense to fly him to Australia was not worth the role he is currently playing. He insisted and even put off surgery in order to be able to go. My guess is that the lure of a large crowd to perform for was too much for his seven-foot ego. It's a good thing they sent him so they could pay all that money to get 10% out of the guy. I mean, did you see his matches last week? Pathetic. 

HEH: Nash versus Sting. Let me guess, Steve gonna carry Kevin, no?

GOOD: Miss Jones. I like this chick. There's something really hot about her.

WHAT THE HELL? Why were there blur spots on my screen? WCW: "Where pussies censor."

WOW: Major Gunns looks really good. Love that hair over one eye look.

QUESTION: Is Duggan still Canadian? Sheesh.

INTERESTING: I hear that Lieutenant Loco may finish out his contract with WCW and then head to WWF to join his Uncle Eddie. Run Chavo, while you have an in there. 

BAD: Rection nearly kills himself hopping the rail. Watch yourself Hugh.

BAD: Where the hell were security when Kronik ran in? They are quick to throw Rection out, but allow Kronik to not only run down, but also actually interfere in the match. These are the little things that bother me the most about WCW.

GOOD: Loco hits a nice frog splash on Elix. Shades of Eddie.

GOOD: Most of this match. Four of the six guys are worth watching. Guess which four!

BAD: Another ref bump? Two for two.

GOOD: The misdirection with the chair. The series of spots that led up to it were quite well orchestrated.

GOOD: Good match overall. A few little issues but a solid effort all-round.

BAD: What happened to the "all new Sting" that was supposed to materialize at Halloween Havok? Another staple of WCW, hyped ideas that never really materialize. Remember that guy with the huge arms that Paul Orndorff supposedly signed?

HUH: "Goldberg: The man behind the muscle?" How kitch is that?

GOOD: Torrie Wilson. Always a pleasure to see her in pleather.

WOW: Look at the size of some of these guys in the audience. I always heard that Aussies were tough, but now I am convinced.

BAD: Shane looks like an idiot with that lipstick on his face.

GOOD: Wow. I am not a fan of Tygress per se, but she is looking tight tonight.

GOOD: Nice elbow by Tygress and she is getting that bronco buster down as well.

GOOD: The mace spot. Good heel tactics by Shane.

BAD: Why is that neck breaker on Rey any more devastating than normal? He got maced so his neck is weaker?

GOOD: Booker has that "entering the arena face" down pat. He looks like he is ready to kill the first person that approaches him. I love it.

HUH? Since when is Kidman a friend of the Filthy Animals? Oh right, since Juvy got released and they need to fill his spot in the stable.

BAD: A 30 second stretcher job is the whole spot? What the? 

OH GOD: Mike Awesome has fallen even lower. Now he is teaming with Crowbar in the 70's gimmick. Now Crowbar is not a bad performer, but he is mainly a jobber, not on par with Awesome. Jesus, they ruined him.

GOOD: At least he is wearing tights tonight instead of a leisure suit.

BAD: Nash's commentary. Apathy is just oozing from his body.

BAD: The crowd is dead during this match.

GOOD: Awesome does a sweet suicide double clothesline over the top rope to the floor.

BAD: Madden, who was running down Mike Awesome at the start of the match, puts the man over now. Make up your mind.

GOOD: Palumbo is looking good tonight.

NOTE: Stevie Ray is putting Palumbo over, the Main Event must be in line for a face turn.

GOOD: This match is quite good, in all honesty.

BAD: Nash keeps screaming stupid things in a goofy voice. That does not add anything to the match, Big Sexy.

GOOD: The post match forced hug. Even Nash got into it.

HUGE: Pamela Paulshock's breasts. Do they double as flotation devices?

BAD: A DNA match? What the hell is that? Do they put a doctor on a pole? Can we get any stupider here? Why am I asking all these questions?

QUESTION: Did they ever really explain what happened to Kwee Wee's wife (wives)? She (they) must have left him because of his infatuation with Paisley.

OW: Kwee Wee breaks Johnny's ankle at the start of the match. Tough break kid, no pun intended.

BAD: Why did they show us this match? Are they that short on decent footage that we have to see a one move bout ended because of a major injury?

YIKES: That ankle injury looks nasty. Poor guy.

BAD: Miss Jones needs to be in a short skirt and half shirt. She is wearing way too many clothes for my tastes.

UGLY: The Cat's sunglasses make him look like some sort of insect.

GREAT: The Cat telling the whole world that he "hates Mark Madden's fat ass." I love this guy.

BAD: A match for the commissionerhood at the next PPV. It looks like Miller is gonna give up the gimmick. Too bad too, I like him as the commish.

BAD: Did they turn Kronik heel just to have them job to Goldberg at the next PPV? Fucking ay.

BAD: Oh, I get it, Kronik is breaking necks and cashing checks. So they decided to have them rip off (and poorly, I might add) the APA gimmick.

AWFUL: Brian Clarke on the stick. Egads.

FUNNY: Sanders selling Goldberg's scream by falling over. That's kinda cool.

GOOD: I have to admit, though the way it is being executed is way too "Sid-like" for me, making Goldberg win 170 matches in a row to get a title shot is a good way to delay his presence in the World Title picture for a while. 

OH NO: Is David Flair a member of the Natural Born Thrillers now?

BAD: Madden introduces Steiner as the next WCW World Champion. Doesn't Shane Douglas have a shot at it first?

HEH: Steiner draws attention to Torrie's facial blemishes. He gets so nasty, they keep muting him out. I bet that really pisses her off for real.

BAD: Here comes Konnan to make sure we don't get a clean match.

BAD: They cut to the fans for a second during the match. What the hell was that?

QUESTION: What happened to the feud between Midajah and Leia Meow? Let me guess, they did not want to spring to fly her to Australia, so we will catch up with that angle sometime next week.

GOOD: Steiner on Madden's observation that he gets fan approval: "The fans are idiots." Heh. Gotta hate him.

GOOD: Pretty good match so far.

WHOOPS: Kidman makes a run-in and nearly kills himself and Midajah when he falls off the apron, through a camera man, to the announcer's table.

BAD: Konnan, Steiner, and Jarrett arrive to ensure that the match becomes a total cluster.

GOOD: Clean win by Booker to end the match.

BAD: They keep muting Jarrett and Steiner. If these guys are gonna say stuff they can't use on the air, perhaps they should consider talking to them about it.

AWFUL: They mute Midajah! She is speaking Spanish, for fuck's sake.

BAD: They are feeding Kidman to Steiner? Yikes.

GOOD: Whooo! The Naitcha Boy in da house!

HOLY MIXED METAPHORS: Tony on Goldberg: "He's like an uncaged animal! Arise!" What the hell does that mean? Volume does not equal logic, Tony. Think before you scream.

COMICAL: David attempting some chops on Goldberg. Bill shrugs the hits off then roars at David. Heh.

BAD: The commentators speculate about what Ric Flair is thinking and he is SITTING RIGHT THERE. Perhaps you could ask him to clear up the mystery. Just a suggestion.

BAD: Kidman claims that he and the rest of the Filthy Animals (read, Rey Mysterio) are as tight as Pamela is in her top. Since when? He turned on them and they hated each other and now this our reunion explanation? "Oh, um, we were always friends...yeah, that's it...that's the ticket..." Oh eat me.

HMMM: Was that fan beating legit? They cut to a long shot, then we see security trying to get Pump off some guy. I know the rule is that, if it shows up on TV, it's a work, but that seemed a little odd to me.

BAD: Schiavone comments about how out of control Steiner is. In fact, he claims that Steiner is more out of control now than he has ever been. They have been saying that for 3 years!

GOOD: Pump drops Kidman with a Samoan Drop from the second rope. Nice move.

BAD: Can you say "squash"? Kidman deserves better than this.

IT WOULD HAVE BEEN COOL...if when Konnan asked "Where my dogs at?" Someone in the crowd shouted back, "The dingoes are in the parking lot, mate. Why do you ask?"

WOW: So that was the guitar shot that took Tygress out. That looked nasty to me. 

GOOD: Quick, somewhat clean match.

GOOD: Nash selling a hangover. He should have puked on one of the lumberjacks. That would have made the illusion complete.

BAD: Look at the scrubs they got outside the ring as lumberjacks. It's actually frightening to see the bulk of the roster when it is put in front of me like this.

COOL: Stinger splash is blocked with a big boot! Nice spot!

OF COURSE: The lumberjacks all clear each other out of the arena. Funny how they all fight to the back in total synchronization.

BAD: Another fucking ref bump followed by a screwjob ending. God forbid you send the Aussie fans home happy, WCW.

OVERALL: Most of the matches were well done, the only issue I had was the frequency of ref bumps, screwjob endings, and the really lousy commentary. It's sad that they are heading back to the states because the shows down under have been noticeably better. The crowd was hot most of the night, and you could tell that the wrestlers were feeding on that energy. I hear that there were at least three injuries at this show in Tygress, Johnny the Bull, and David Flair. I don't know if that's a sign of intensity or just wrestlers being sloppy. Perhaps a little of both. 

WWF MONDAY NIGHT RAW

GOOD: Eddie cuts a cool heel promo to top off the show. I missed the cheater a lot.

GOOD: Jericho versus Eddie Guerrero. This will be a good match.

BETTER: Jericho mentions the 20 minute interview segment. He always says what we are all thinking.

WOW: Guerrero takes a cool bump into the ropes.

GOOD: Eddie fakes an injury to stop getting his ass beat. Welcome back Eddie.

BAD: Frigging X-Pac. Isn't this feud over yet?

GOOD: Mr. Ass is over. Wow. Listen to that crowd.

PREDICTION: Do I sense a tag team match Thursday? Eddie/X-Pac versus Gunn/Jericho. I will like to see that match.

GOOD: Stephanie making Angle into her boy Friday. Where is this going?

GOOD: Rikishi making the heel turn. Even CyanIndigo noticed that he is clad in all black now. Heh.

INTERESTING: I wonder if Rikishi is only a small part of this whole thing and he is just soaking up the "accolades" for the deed. I have a feeling that someone else is behind this all...perhaps a guy named Dwayne...

BAD: Overall Rikishi's interview was fairly lame. He flubs his lines and comes across as personable as a block of wood.

GOOD: They are making him a lot more serious now. No more dancing. Just in time. That gimmick was getting old.

GOOD: Trish having to take it all off on Sunday night. So that's how she keeps those things way up there.

BAD: We know that they won't show anything, so why bother?

QUESTION: Screw Chyna, why isn't Trish in Playboy? Or Lita? Of all the women in WWF and WCW, Chyna would have been my last choice to take it all off. 

IDEA: How about a "Trish take it all off" match for the PPV. Promise to show us Trish's breasts and I guarantee that you will blow the roof off with your buyrate.

BAD: How can Jim Ross consider the attack by T&A on the Acolytes a set-up? They lost all their money and made their manager strip to nearly nothing for Farooq and Bradshaw's pleasure! If they wanted to beat them up, why didn't they just hide behind a doorway and ambush them? Seems to be a lot easier and involve less of a loss of money and their manager's modesty.

BAD: Most of this match... kinda sluggish with a few "superheavyweight" spots thrown in there.

AWFUL: What a stupid way to get bumped. Trish gets on the apron and Bradshaw just decided to stop fighting for a kiss? Well, duh.

COOL: Clothesline from Hell on Albert. Been a while since I have seen that move.

GOOD: The APA gets a clean win. We like clean pinfalls.

UGLY: Did Stephanie forget to take off her pajama top before she left the hotel? Purple satin?

GOOD: Stephanie is becoming more evil and McMahon-like again. I am enjoying this.

GOOD: Al Snow finally doing England. That picture of Regal is classic! Oh man. I really like this feud.

GOOD: Regal is looking good out there. He is in great shape. Certainly better than his last WCW run.

BAD: They are doing the European Title match tonight? Why?

GOOD: Regal is excellent in that ring. The swinging reverse DDT was sweet. The multiple covers off one bump spots are great to see too.

WOW: Regal wins the title tonight? What's up with that? I thought they were saving this one for the PPV.

GOOD: Regal gets the heel heat...nice job "William."

SIGH: HHH and Angle are still at it. Now I understand that the depth of this feud requires more attention, and I am following unpopular thought right now, but I just want them to move on.

WHAT? Kane versus HHH? What the hell is this booking. Why?

GOOD: Major face pop for The Game.

COOL: Benoit is out baby. You know he's gonna lay a hurting down tonight.

BAD: He will likely prevent any sort of clean ending to this match.

GOOD: Benoit is getting better at the stick. Oh yes he is. His commentary is cool. "Would you rather be that damn good, or the best damn technical wrestler in the industry?" Preach on brother!

FUNNY: Angle laughing after convincing Stephanie that Hunter can take care of himself.

QUESTION: Anyone else remember when Helmsley dressed up like Golddust to shoot a fire from a bazooka into Kane's face?

BAD: Ross calls HHH's jumping knee to a bent over opponent a "facebuster." The X-Factor is a facebuster. This move is just a knee to the face.

WOW: This is turning into quite a match! HHH attacks Benoit and gives Kane a pedigree outside the ring. 

BAD: Benoit attacks with the chair drawing a DQ to a good match. 

GOOD: Benoit beats the crap out of HHH after the DQ! Is that a pop I hear? 

BAD: Benoit has exchanged the snot blow with a sweat wipe. I miss the snot blow. I especially miss when Dean Malenko used to sell it like acid hitting him in the face.

TOO BAD: You know what would have been cool? If the UT just chokeslammed that idiot in the mask who was trying to scare him.

BAD: We have to wait for Austin to visit all four corners before we get going with this interview.

YEAH YEAH: Stone Cold's interview. I guess it's good, and it has passion, but I am just not interested. Am I tired of him already?

COOL: I like the new Rikishi. His challenge of Austin in the parking lot is sweet. You know he's setting the Rattlesnake up.

BAD: Why does JR assume that Rikishi has a "death wish"? Austin is tough, but so is Rikishi.

HEH: I love the irony of Austin striding out into the very parking lot that he was run over in to confront the guy who was driving the car! He has to be the dumbest guy on the face of the earth.

GOOD: Rikishi taking a shot at Austin with the car and taking off.

I HOPE...they don't blow the feud off with some sort of a squash at the PPV. I'd like to see some Samoan cousins help Rikishi out in taking Austin down.

BAD: X-Pac. Why can't he get injured and hang out with the Bossman and take some time off?

WHY DO I GET THE FEELING...that Billy is gonna turn heel to join X-Pac sometime soon?

COOL: Evil Ed is back again, nailing Ass from behind! Latino Heat is dead! Cheat to win!

WHAT? Is this a match now?

BAD: The match ends in 15 seconds. What the hell? Damned cluster!

GOOD: Jericho ignores his own music to go over the top rope and take X-Pac out. I just wanna fly!

HEH: Foley is in the keg fridge. The earmuffs are a nice touch.

GOOD: The Conquistadors. Of course they aren't Edge and Christian...at least, they won't be when this gimmick runs its course.

FUNNY: This schtick is quite good. I like the little pose down by Conquistador Uno just before Buh Buh gives him a punch in the gut.

BAD: This match seems to drag a bit. Too many rest holds.

GOOD: Clean pin when Buh Buh Ray makes a stupid mistake and tries to get the mask off Conquistador Dos. 

FUNNY: The way these guys run up the ramps. Allow me to pull a phrase from my childhood..."What a goof!"

UM OK: Road Dogg versus Venis. Um, I guess so.

BAD: RTC still doesn't have a female member in their stable. Where the hell is Mona?

BAD: Crowd slowly dies during this match. So does my interest.

HEY: Where the hell was RTC when Trish was taking it all off on Sunday? Not that I am complaining, but I was wondering.

UGLY: A run in by Nudeon! Yegads. Bleah. Urg.

WOW: XFL Cheerleader tryouts. Homina homina. For once I am enjoying the King's lecherous antics.

UGLY: Stephanie's voice as she introduces Kurt Angle. Is she trying to injure my eardrums?

I WONDER: Where are they going with this Angle/Stephanie exchange?

AH: Accusations of the Rock's potential guilt in the running down of Stone Cold Steve Austin.

GOOD: Rocky and Hardies versus Angle/Edge/Christian. This should be an interesting match.

GOOD: Lita...oh yeah. 

WOW: Edge goes absolutely nuts on the Rock to start.

GOOD: The crowd is pumped for this match. They should be. They have four of the hardest workers in the business out there. It's good to see them in teh main event.

BAD: Edge nails a flubbed German suplex on Matt Hardy. He looks like he landed badly there.

BAD: Matt's "face in peril" sequence lasts a bit too long for my tastes.

GOOD: Lita hits a major hurricanrana off the top rope and gets smashed into the ring post by Stephanie for her troubles. Nice sequence of spots. Good bumpage by Lita.

BAD: Bit of a cluster at the ending. Lots of interference and Steph again goes over wrestlers. 

GOOD: I guess we can't expect Angle to get pinned by Jeff Hardy.

OVERALL: A fast paced and well produced show tonight. It advanced many of the storylines set to converge on this weekend's PPV quite effectively. the Rikishi/Stone Cold feud looks like it might be something worth our time and emotional investment, and I am looking forward to Roc/Angle and HHH/Benoit. I have no real complaints, so I guess we will move on.

Whew, what a ride! Two really decent shows. It was a good night to be a wrestling fan, folks.

Before I close out, let me get a shout out to John Petrie at Slobberknocker Central. He writes some fantastic recaps of the Monday Night shows that focus more on his personal opinion of each company's efforts and direction. His thoughts are insightful and very impressively presented. Take the time to read him and I think you'll agree with me.

Okay, it's been great, gang. Be good and I will see you all next week.

Questions, comments, rapture of the deep? Send all correspondence to michaelangelo70@hotmail.com. All letters will be answered or targeted for termination.

I am Michaelangelo and will be for a while.