WWF ROYAL RUMBLE 2001
We start with a package that goes over how important the rumble is in terms of making superstars. Some of these guys will never see a World Title shot - so this is their chance. Well done.
Jim Ross welcomes us, and it sounds like he's got a bad cold.
THE DUDLEY BOYZ vs. EDGE and CHRISTIAN (for the WWF World Tag-Team Titles)
The Dudley Boyz waste NO time beating the hell out of Edge and Christian, so they decide it's time to leave. The Dudleys chase them back to the ring as the crowd chants for tables. D-Von gets a neckbreaker on Edge for 2 early on. Christian is tagged in, and he is taken down quickly by D-Von and D-Von covers for 2. Bubba tagged in, and the Dudleys hit a double clothesline. Bubba drops an elbow and gets another 2. Bubba beats on Christian in the corner. Lawler rips on the Dudleys much like he used to rip on the Godwinns. Back body drop on Christian and he whips Christian into the corner. Christian hits a headscissors, but Bubba's up and levels Edge on the apron. Sidewalk slam on Christian for 2. Bubba tags in D-Von, but Christian gets a knee to the midsection, and tags Edge in. Edge gets caught with a powerslam and D-Von gets 2. D-Von whipped into the ropes and Christian knocks him down so Edge takes over with stomps. Belly to back on D-Von, and Christian gets tagged. Christian hits a Russian legsweep, followed up by slamming D-Von's head into the mat. Edge chokes D-Von on the ropes while the ref is distracted. Edge is tagged in. Nice neckbreaker on D-Von, it gets 2 before Bubba saves. Christian back in. He doesn't do much so he tags Edge in. Snapmare, into a headlock. D- Von looks like he's starting to feel the concussion. Swinging neckbreaker on D-Von gets 2. Edge tells Bubba he's gonna break him like a twig. Christian in and beats on D-Von in the corner some more. Crowd wants tables. Edge back in and signals for a piledriver, but D-Von counters with a catapult into Christian who was up top and he gets crotched! A rollup gets two. Both Edge and D-Von go down with clotheslines from eachother. Bubba's the only guy on his feet. D-Von starts the crawl, and makes the tag but the ref did not see it. While he argues with Bubba, Edge and Christian get the chairs in. They miss the Conchairto and D-Von hits them with a double clothesline. Bubba gets tagged in and it's time to take them apart. Christian takes a Bubba bomb among other things, Edge gets scoop slammed and hit with a WASSUP drop! It's time to testify and get the tables. Christain goes out to cut D-Von off, but gets beat up. Edge gets rolled up by Bubba for 2. They go for 3-D on Christian but Edge spears Bubba, and Christian with a DDT on D-Von. Bubba kicks out of the spear! Edge goes up top while Christian holds the legs and they yell WASSUP! Edge gets shoved off the top by D-Von and Christian gets rolled up so Edge lands on Christian's groin. The rollup itself got 2. They hit 3-D on Edge and we have new tag-team champions.
The Dudleys sold the concussions VERY well throughout the match and only won cause E&C acted like retards at the end. Very solid opener.
Backstage, Drew Carey has arrived at the arena.
Vince McMahon announces HHH will get the World Title shot tonight, even though he hit Steve Austin on Smackdown because it was a mistake. Ross for once agrees with his decision.
HHH tells Stephanie not to get involved in the World Title match. Stephanie says she's going out to avoid Trish costing him the match. Drew Carey enters the room and asks when he married the bosses daughter. HHH says a year ago. Drew ran into Kamala at the airport. Drew's looking for Vince. Stephanie suggests while he waits for Vince he meet a big fan of his - Trish Stratus. Steph says Trish is not seeing anyone.
The Acolytes won't tell eachother what their rumble numbers are cause it's not right. Finally they agree to show it to one another. Bradshaw laughs and says it'll be interesting. Crash Holly comes in and wants to make sure they're friends. Crash tells them if they get in his way in the rumble, they're gonna get it! They laugh at him and call him a drunk.
We go to a video package of Chris Benoit and Chris Jericho's long history. Interestingly enough, this was the last time they did battle on PPV one on one before they became pals. They did face eachother one more time in the 4 corners match at No Way Out.
CHRIS JERICHO vs. CHRIS BENOIT (in a ladder match for the WWF Intercontinental Title)
The Chris' meet and start to duke it out right away. Jericho knocks Benoit down with a clothesline and starts to chop away in the corner. Kicks to the midsection, whip, reversed and Jericho gets the boot up. Benoit goes for the Crossface and Jericho reverses into an attempt at the Walls Of Jericho and Benoit gets out of that. Benoit throws Jericho through the ropes and into the ringpost. Shoulderbreaker on Jericho, but Jericho hammers back. Jericho off the ropes, looking for a springboard dropkick but no one's home and Jericho flies over the top to the floor. Benoit goes to get the ladder but Jericho comes and stops him. Jericho gets run into the ringpost shoulder first and Benoit gets the ladder back to the ring. Jericho attempts a baseball slide dropkick onto the ladder and into Benoit's face, but Benoit moves and throws Jericho into the ring steps. Benoit sets up the ladder and starts his climb. Jericho comes in and stops him by picking him on his shoulders and dropping him back. Jericho with some chops and thows Benoit back into the turnbuckle. Jericho picks up the ladder and runs it right into Benoit's face! Jericho rams Benoit's head into the turnbuckle, then runs the ladder into Benoit's midsection. Jericho sets up the ladder in the corner, and kicks away at Benoit's midsection. He goes to throw Benoit into the ladder, but Benoit reverses and Jericho goes face first into the ladder and flies over the top. Benoit goes for a suicide dive, but Jericho hits him SQUARE IN THE FACE with a chair while he's mid air. Jesus!!! Benoit gets hotshotted onto the security wall, and Jericho sets up the ladder. He falls forward trying to hit Benoit but Benoit moves and Jericho falls off. Benoit runs the ladder into Jericho's face. Benoit hits Jericho with the chair and rolls him in. Off the ropes, double forearm and Jericho's down. Benoit brings the ladder back in and sets it up in the corner. Benoit picks up Jericho and runs him into the ladder head first. Benoit picks him up to do it again but Jericho slips off and shoves Benoit into the ladder instead. Now Jericho sets it up in the corner and runs his leg into the ladder. Benoit's trapped. Jericho climbs up the ladder and pulls it back. They both go crashing down, but Benoit's leg is trapped in the rung and the ladder crashes down on him while Jericho jumps off to the side. Jericho picks the ladder up but Benoit dropkicks the ladder back into Jericho. Benoit with a suplex, and sets the ladder up on the turnbuckle sideways. Benoit tries a whip but it gets reversed and Benoit goes headfirst into the ladder. Jericho props it up at an angle, and when Benoit stands, Jericho uses the ladder like a see-saw and clocks Benoit in the face! Jericho throws the ladder at Benoit when he stands, Benoit grabs it, and Jericho's off the top with a missile dropkick! Jericho starts the slow climb but Benoit catches him and calmly dumps him over the top rope. Now Benoit's on his way up. Jericho manages to get to his feet and go after Benoit. He climbs after him, so Chris sits on top and kicks him down. Jericho gets him the second time and puts a Walls Of Jericho on Benoit from the top of the ladder. Jericho sends Benoit off the ladder, and is a second away from the title! However, Benoit kicks it over and there goes Jericho to the ground. Jericho first back to his feet and picks up the ladder. He runs it into Benoit and sets it back up again. He kicks Benoit for good measure and starts his climb. Benoit pulls Jericho off and puts in the Crippler Crossface! Jericho's tapping like crazy but it doesn't matter. He keeps it on for about 30 seconds and throws Jericho shoulder first into the ringpost. He goes to toss Jerich out of the ring but Jericho counters with a pick up and toss into the ladder. Jericho tells that son of a bitch to get up. Jericho sets the ladder up in the corner with Benoit behind it. However, Benoit recovers and they're both up top. Jericho goes for a superplex from the top, but Benoit knocks him off. Benoit stands on top of the ladder and goes for the flying headbutt but Jericho rolls out of the way. Jericho sets up the ladder with Benoit trapped underneath the rungs at the bottom, so Benoit does the only thing he can do - use all his strength to push the ladder up and over. Jericho flies into the ropes and rolls to the floor, and Benoit sets the ladder back up. Benoit climbs but gets hit by Jericho with a chair. Benoit kicks Jericho, so Jericho shoves the ladder off and Benoit flies onto the ropes and continues to the floor. Jericho climbs, while Benoit tries to get back into the ring. Jericho grabs the belt and we have a new Intercontinental champion!
That was quite the brutal ride from the 2 of them.
Trish and Drew are backstage, and Trish says she's involved with someone right now. Vince comes into the room and Drew starts asking how to promote the show. Vince suggests he does improv tonight, and enter the rumble. Drew doesn't want to get hurt, and Vince says the WWF is all about fun. Drew sits back proud of himself.
Billy Gunn tries to convince Chyna not to wrestle. Chyna says there's no reason to worry and she doesn't care what doctors say about her neck.
Michael Cole interviews Jericho and he says he's proved Benoit wrong.
Recap of the GREATEST PILEDRIVER EVER as it took Chyna out for a long time. However, we had to endure her crying for weeks on end about her neck. So Ivory does a mock interview that was absolutely hilarious. Ivory called out Chyna week after week because we knew Chyna wouldn't respond. So Chyna responded.
IVORY (with Steven Richards) vs. CHYNA (for the WWF Women's Title)
Chyna with a clothesline, and a couple of hairdrags. Chyna whips Ivory into the turnbuckles, mounts her up top and hits a snapmare. Chyna pounds away at Ivory in the corner, picks up up top and knocks her to the floor. Ivory tries to escape through the crowd but Chyna catches her and gorilla press slams her over the security wall and back to ringside. Ivory rolled back into the ring. Chyna with a front slam so Steven Richards is in, but Chyna takes care of him too. Ivory whipped into the corner and goes for a handspring elbow and drops down. Ivory pins her and retains.
JR sells the neck injury like she fell from the ceiling and died. If you consider that comment tasteless, go find yourself a copy of Over The Edge 1999 and you explain to me the difference between JR's voice in that case and right now.
Stephanie goes looking to the makeup department to fix her hair. But Trish is there! If Trish gets involved in the title match, she's gonna go down.
Drew Carey gets wrestling gear from Harvey Wippleman. Kane comes in and Drew introduces himself. Kane walks out and Drew calls him grouchy.
Lo Down can't agree on who's in the rumble. Tiger promises to pick the one who will represent them best. Vince comes in and says neither member of Lo Down is in the rumble. They want to know who's replaced them. He says Drew Carey. Tiger's never heard of Drew Curry.
Fans in WWF New York are split on who's gonna win the title match. Doesn't this belong on Heat or something I'm not paying money for?
HHH breathes heavy in front of a window. Look out, he's on the verge of giving birth to a hand!
Here comes Kurt Angle talking to himself and walking to the ring.
Now here's a video package about the history of HHH and Angle. Well sorta. They recap the past month, ignoring the summer of 2000 completely. We actually spend more time looking at Stephanie and Trish to be honest, cause T&A and McMahons = buyrates!
HUNTER HEARST HELMSLEY (with Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley) vs. KURT ANGLE (with Trish Stratus) (for the WWF World Heavyweight Title)
Thankfully, the last 10 minutes have been redeemed simply on the COOLEST entrance in the WWF. JR wants to know what Linda's thinking, to which Lawler responds vegetables don't do much thinking. Heh! HHH immediately goes to work on the arm of Kurt. However, Kurt manages a fireman's carry takedown but HHH locks him up in the corner. Kurt comes back with a hiptoss and clotheslines him over the top. Crowd starts Angle Sucks chant. HHH back in and knocks Kurt off his feet with right hands. Headfirst into the turnbuckle and Kurt takes more punches. Whip reversed, HHH forward and gets backbody dropped. Kurt takes HHH off his feet and goes back to working the arm but HHH escapes. HHH attempts a suplex but Kurt lands on his feet and hits a snap suplex of his own. And another! Make it 3! Kurt with a cover and it gets a 2 count. HHH rolls out to recover. Kurt follows him out and starts with right hands on HHH. He tries a whip into the security railing but HHH reverses. Angle is whipped onto the other side as well, then gets hotshotted onto the railing hard! Kurt goes face first into the steps and takes another punch before being rolled back into the ring. Kurt comes back with right hands, off the ropes but HHH was ready with a drop toe hold. HHH with a couple of leg grapevines, and Ross starts going on about Buddy Rogers using that move, but Lawler doesn't care. Lawler goes on about Drew Carey instead cause it's new millenium. HHH continues to work the leg with a single leg takedown. He tries again but Kurt comes back with an enzuigiri and Kurt scores a 2 with that. Kurt goes into the corner but HHH reverses and stomps away at Kurt's midsection. HHH gets whipped into the corner and Flair flips over the top and to the floor. Kurt's legs are pulled out and HHH wraps them around the ringpost but Kurt pulls back and HHH goes headfirst into the ringpost. HHH gets thrown into the steps out on the floor. Kurt rolls HHH back in and charges into the corner but HHH ducks and Kurt goes into the turnbuckle. HHH out to the floor and whips Angle's leg on the ringpost. Steph distracts the ref so HHH starts to slam the chair into Kurt's leg. The ref comes over and asks him about it but HHH plays innocent. HHH drops Angle kneefirst onto the steps. He rolls Kurt back in the ring and starts to focus his attack directly on the knee. A running chop block on Kurt takes him down. HHH hits another and Kurt is hurting. HHH jerks the knee forward. He sets it up on the ropes and drops down on it hard. He sets the knee up and does it again. HHH puts an Indian deathlock on Kurt and slaps him around when given the chance. Kurt fires back with punches and manages to get out of the hold. Kurt up with rights. He fires HHH off into the ropes but HHH comes back with the knee, and scores a 2 count. He covers again, and gets 2. HHH back to the knee, lifting it up in the air and slamming it down hard. HHH chops in the corner. HHH sets up the knee on the second rope, and drops his own knee on it hard. HHH goes to the figure four now in the middle of the ring. HHH is turning into Ric Flair before our eyes! HHH uses the ropes for leverage. Trish tries to get the refs attention so Stephanie beats the crap out of her on the announce table. Trish fights back, and here comes Mr. McMahon. Vince is all "Nononononononono" the whole way to the ring and tries to break them up. Vince picks up Trish over his shoulder and drags her to the back but Steph comes after them and pulls them down and goes back to work on Trish. Vince again tries to run Trish to the back and Steph attacks again. They both fight to the back. HHH is staring on wondering what the hell just happened. HHH goes back to the figure four but Angle rolls him up for 2. HHH gets up and nails a hard clothesline. HHH drops elbows on Kurt's knee. HHH again tries to put on the figure four but he gets shoved off and into the turnbuckle. Angle fights back and hits a DDT. That gets 2. Angle hits an atomic drop and a German suplex with bridge for 2. Kurt with a Russian legsweep and heads up for the moonsault but HHH gets a lowblow followed by a second rope Outsiders Edge, and Ross acknowledges Razor's name. HHH tries 3 pinfalls that all get 2. HHH with a kick to the midsection and goes for the Pedigree but Kurt knocks him down but gets kicked off into the turnbuckle. He bounces back and hits a headbutt into HHH's groin. Angle goes back up and hits the moonsault. He covers for 2 and the crowd was split on whether that was it. Kurt charges but gets launched over to the floor. HHH tries to go off the apron but gets hit in the midsection and takes out Hebner. Kurt tries to whip HHH into the security railing but HHH reverses that. Angle gets tossed back in, and HHH goes up top, but gets caught by a quick armdrag takedown. Angle covers but the ref is still dead. Angle goes to wake him up, but HHH follows and they're fighting on the floor. Hebner gets in between and goes headfirst into the turnbuckle and is out again. HHH rolls Kurt back in and gets the belt. Kurt kicks him though and hits an overhead belly to belly! Kurt has the belt now, but HHH kicks him and hits the Pedigree! He covers but Hebner continues to nap. The crowd explodes as HHH checks the ref, and it's time for the Steve Austin run in. Austin levels HHH with the belt, grabs Earl, and throws him into the ring. HHH decides to get up so he gets hit by a Stunner. Hebner wakes up as Kurt covers. That's enough for the Kurt Angle win and he retains!
That was crazy old school during the middle. The run in by Austin hurts it, as does the whole Stephanie / Trish fighting cause I love clean endings, unless there's a darn good reason for a run in. In this case, I feel they could have done without it.
Coming into the show, I picked The Undertaker to win the rumble, just to be different. My brother had The Rock, and my girlfriend who doesn't follow closely had Steve Austin.
The Rock is interviewed about the rumble. He's tired of hearing about Undertaker and Kane. Undertaker wants to tickle Kane's nipple or something. Hey, Rock, weren't you a tag-team champion with Undertaker just a few weeks ago? The Rock says it might come down to him and any number of people. It doesn't matter who it comes down to if ya smell what The Rock is cooking.
Time for a video about the rumble. Rikishi says he'll be last man standing. Kane is 7 feet tall. It's Kane vs. The World. Undertaker is the big dog that runs the yard. The Rock has a dream of winning the rumble. Stone Cold is posessed with becoming champion. Am I the only person who thinks adding someone like, say, Crash Holly talking about being scarred to death and knowing he has no chance be much more interesting? Norman Smiley would be perfect in that role actually.
THE ROYAL RUMBLE
Jeff Hardy draws #1. JR says Michaels came in at #1 in 1995 and won. If that's another Michaels / Hardy comparison I'm gonna puke. Bull Buchanon draws #2. I hope Buchanon throws him out seconds in, but alas that's only a dream. Hardy with a headscissors takeover does nothing cause Buchanon comes back with a Gorilla press attempt, but Hardy wiggles away. Hardy fights Buchanon in the corner and almost gets him over the top but Buchanon gets away. We're 10 seconds away from the next entrant. Matt Hardy gets #3. Hey, and I picked the Hardys to draw 1 and 2. I'm glad I win SOME of these betting games. My brother had Acolytes, sucker. :-) The brothers knock out Buchanon, and get to fighting themselves cause they clearly have learned NOTHING from Kane and The Undertaker. Morons. Matt ALMOST gets tossed but the countdown begins so they stop fighting and wait for whoever it is. Farooq is #4. He demolishes Hardys and almost tosses Matt and Jeff on seperate occasions, but there being 2 is kind of a pain. Twist of Fate, and Swanton Bomb takes Farooq down and enough to say goodbye to former World Champion Ron Simmons. Jeff gets tossed hard over the top by Matt but hangs on long enough to come in and take off his shirt. So Matt takes off his shirt. Here comes the countdown, and it's Drew Carey at #5. He's got high fives for everyone. Meanwhile, the stupid Hardys keep fighting. And you WONDER why Edge and Christian have won the titles a thousand times and you guys can't hang on to any? Drew comes in as they knock eachother out. So Drew's in the ring all by himself. He's getting the Diesel push I tell ya! Time for a countdown and it's Kane at #6. Drew's looking for anyone to help him. Kane stalks around the ring. You know, if he ducked UNDER the ropes and ran away, he could do like Vince did in 99. Kanelights all the turnbuckles on fire, and this entrance took about 2 minutes. Where's the next guy? Drew offers his hand to Kane, and then offers money. Kane wants no money. He goes to chokeslam Kane. #7 is Raven to break up the chokeslam attempt. Drew immediately bails deciding he wants NOTHING more to do with these guys. Say, if Raven gets pinned does he lose the hardcore title? Raven rolls out to the floor and gets some plunder. He sprays Kane with the fire extinguisher and Lawler comments Kane might have liked one at some point in his life. Al Snow runs in and we're not sure if he's #8 or if he wants the hardcore title. Sure enough, he just ran in to get the hardcore title. The buzzer rings, NOW he's officially in. Garbage can lids for all! Snow back out and gets a garbage can, complete with garbage. Kane gets hit with the bowling bag, and ball. Snow hits the 7 - 10 split on Raven. Kane comes back and beats on Snow. Raven tries to get a shot in on Kane but he gets knocked down. However, Snow and Raven team up and play dualing trash can shots on Kane and take him down. Now the 2 start to fight. #9 is Perry Saturn. Terry joins him. Funny these hardcore guys coming in all together. Saturn starts to work on Kane's leg. There's just trash everywhere at this point. Saturn gets caught in a power slam by Kane. Raven jumps on Kane's back with a sleeper and Snow hits him with trashcan lids. They have Kane on his feet, but they decide to fight amongst themselves instead of get Kane out. Here comes Steve Blackman at #10. He brings his sticks and beats the crap out of Al. Saturn gets taken down. Kane knocks Blackman off his feet. Raven tries to toss Al but fails. Saturn and Blackman team up on Kane. Then they go across the ring and team up on Al Snow. #11 is Grand Master Sexay... Uh, dude, I'd sit this one out. At least until the clubberin' be done. He runs in anyway and tries to get hardcore but really looks out of place. Kane launches Grand Master with a trashcan shot, goodbye! Blackman gets tossed. There goes Snow and Raven. We're down to Saturn and Kane, but that doesn't last as Saturn gets tossed too. Honky Tonk Man is in at #12. Now that was unexpected! He tells Kane to stand aside for a minute while the greatest Intercontinental Champion off all time does his thing. He starts to sing his song while Kane just looks at him. This reminds me of him and Pete Rose. Maybe HE should have ran in at Wrestlemania. HTM gets belted with the guitar to a HUGE pop for Kane. He gets tossed. The Rock is in at #13. That's kinda early. Right hands for Kane! Flying clothesline, and he goes to toss Kane but Kane stops. He stomps Rock in the corner. Fans chant Rocky! Rock is just getting killed and could use some help. That help comes in the form of #14 The Goodfather. Forget that, he's forgotten about The Nation and has issues with Rocky. The Rock tosses him promptly though. So with that out of the way, we can go back to Kane kicking The Rock's ass. Rock fires back with some rights though, but Kane hits a huge sidewalk slam. The Rock must be praying this time someone who can help is coming. It's Tazz at #15. Or at least WAS Tazz, goodbye sez Kane. The Rock is up on the top turnbuckle now, and almost tossed but he hits a right hand and gets down. Now he's trying to scoop slam Kane over the top but can't seem to do it. They fight some more and are both down as #16 is Bradshaw. He has Kane on the ropes immediately, and Rock comes over to help. Rock hits a clothesline on Kane but Bradshaw hits Rock with a clothesline FROM HELL! Bradshaw takes over completely. The Rock manages to squeak out a spinebuster on Bradshaw but Kane immediately takes him down. Kane's back in control and really looking dominant. Albert is #17. He's a stud you know. Albert makes Lawler think of Trish. That's disturbing. Albert has Bradshaw JUST about over, and The Rock is being taken care of by Kane on the other end. Bradshaw gets tossed, or does he? No, he's still in and rolls back under the ropes. Bradshaw beats up Albert and stuff. #18 is Hardcore Holly. JR wants to know what we think of him now. Not much. Kane and Rock clearly don't either cause they put their differences aside to beat him up. Albert however manages to get Kane on the ropes, while Bradshaw and Bob have The Rock falling over on the other end. The Rock manages to hook the bottom rope and stay in. Kane has also escaped. Scissors kick by Albert on Kane. Albert tries to toss Holly. And Rocky has Kane falling on the other end. #19 is K- Kwik. "Hi K-Kwik" Holly's got Bradshaw on the ropes. K-Kwik takes apart Albert. Go K-Kwik! Rock is unable to toss K-Kwik while Holly hits a lowblow on Kane. Albert goes to work on Rocky. Christ, pick a guy and stick to him. Val Venis is #20 and promptly gets destroyed by Kane. Hardcore Holly has his way with The Rock. Ross declares Kane's been in a half hour, but looking at my timer I know he's a liar by about 5 minutes. So why were Bradshaw and Farooq's numbers so interesting again? No one's been tossed for awhile. Alright, William Regal comes in to be funny at #21. He beats on K-Kwik, maybe because he doesn't use napkins? Val Venis takes his second spinebuster in the last 5 minutes, this time from The Rock. Val Venis gets The Rock up, and almost over but Bradshaw makes the save. Bradshaw fireman's carries Val to the corner, but can't get him out. This is a Test is #22. Goodbye Willie. *sigh* Now it's time to beat up Albert. Bob almost has Val over the top, but Val escapes. Hey, The Big Show's back! And he's #23. Regardless of what everyone says, he looks to be in better shape to me. Goodbye Test! See ya K- Kwik! Chokeslams for all! Including Kane! There's only one guy left, that would be Rocky, but he manages a lowblow and has Show reeling....there he goes! Still, an impressive return. Show goes nuts and puts Rock through the announce table, UNDER the ropes so he's still in. Here comes Crash at #24. I hope he chokeslams everyone. Everyone in the ring works together to beat up Kane. If they were smart, they'd work together to THROW OUT Kane. Too late, you wasted too much time because here comes #25 The Undertaker. Bradshaw gets tossed! Crash, Hardcore, Albert, and Val are all gone! That leaves Kane and Taker to stare at eachother. GO GET THE ROCK, HE'S ON THE FLOOR! Scotty 2 Hotty comes in at #26, and he's REALLY uneasy. I don't blame him, there's 2 guys 7 feet tall standing side by side in the ring. Just wait it out. No, that would make sense. He's ballsy, that's for sure. He gets beat up a whole lot, then tossed following a double chokeslam. I think Scotty needs a hug after that. Where's Austin? Rock is still dead on the floor. Oh, speaking of Austin, he's #27. HHH runs in and beats up Austin. Whew, he must be pleased he doesn't have to get in the ring with those 2. The Rock is back from the dead and starts a fight with the living dead. They beat him up, while Austin is left a bloody mess in the aisle by HHH. He's an absolute wreck. Who's next? Well, that would be #28 The One Billy Gunn. He hammers away on Kane, then the Taker. HHH is STILL beating on Austin. Refs have to pull him away. Austin's chances to go to Wrestlemania are diminishing Ross tells us. You're telling me he wouldn't get booked in a match if he doesn't win the rumble? Taker hits a DDT on Rock. Ross claims never to have seen one like that before. #29 is... you're friggin' kidding me!!! HAKU! Watching this show the first time around, I'll be honest, I was yelling HOLY SHIT at the top of my lungs, much to the dismay of everyone in the house who were sleeping. Haku takes his fight to The Undertaker, a tactic later stolen by DDP. #30 is Rikishi Phatu. He's a bad man. He sees Austin and decides to fight with him, but Austin kicks the crap out of him and rolls him in. He's a bloody mess, but he's still invincible! He stomps on Billy Gunn, who I'd forgotten about until now. Haku gets tossed by Austin. Doh. Rikishi gets chokeslammed by Taker. The Rock starts to beat upTaker now, so Taker decides to rid himself of the Rock....only he holds on to the bottom rope. Rikishi superkicks Taker out, so there goes my pick. Rikishi drags The Rock to the corner and goes for the HEART STOPPING BANZAI DROP. Only, he gets lowblowed and tossed. Billy Gunn's in the final four? Oh come on! Fameasser for Austin. He goes to toss Austin but Austin reverses, there goes Billy. The Rock and Austin stare at eachother and here we go. Right hands all around! Rock takes Austin down and waits for Austin... He sets up the Rock Bottom but can't hit it. Stunner for Rocky! Kane reminds Austin he's alive but Austin beats him up and hits a Thesz press. Rock up and attacks Austin, but Austin rakes the eyes, however Rock counters with a Rock Bottom. Kane attacks Rock but Rocky tosses him - through the middle ropes, so he's still alive. Rock and Austin go back to fighting. Scoop by Austin, he has Rock on the ropes but Rock rakes Austin's eyes. So Rock goes to dump him, and Kane tries to dump both and actually GETS The Rock out! Man, I DID NOT see that coming. We're down to Austin and Kane! Chokeslam for Austin. We're at the hour mark. Nutshot for Kane. Kane rolls out and gets a chair. Austin knocks it away and reverses a tombstone into a Stunner! Austin gets the chair. A shot for Kane! 2 shots! There's number 3, and he's on the ropes! Austin with a clothesline and that's it! He's going to Wrestlemania!
Total Matches: 5
One of the best rumbles ever, hands down. The ending was clean and the whole thing was interesting with alot of fun moments. The only down point during the whole show was the stupid Chyna neck injury thing, but that aside the show's everything you could possibly want in a wrestling show!