THE UNWRITTEN RULES OF WRESTLING
How is it going, everybody? Well, summer is half-way over for those of us who have to go back to school. Luckily for me, my summer vacation ends in late September, which gives me the luxury of enjoying Summerslam without worrying about school the next day. I didn't write an article last week, because my current summer job, which I currently love, has been keeping me busy, but now I've found some time to share my ignorance with all of you.
Well, the People's Champion made his way back into our environment Monday night, and surely, the place was rocking for the final segment. Which side is he on? The Rock chose the WWF, but I do wonder how committed the Rock is to being a full-time wrestler again. I love the Rock, but is he willing to wrestle four days a week, instead of basking the glory of a Hollywood life? Would the Rock be willing to sacrifice some movie revenue if he was asked to turn heel and join the Alliance? These are just questions to ponder. I have come to the conclusion that the Alliance will eventually have to find another day of television, and be run separately. In that case, there is no winner between the WWF and WECW and we can still have inter-promotional matches on every PPV. They should have one of these matches every PPV, and make it really special. Right now, the titles are completely meaningless. Booker T.'s WCW title means shit as it has become a hot potato. The WWF might be running into the same problem as boxing. It has too many titles for the average fan to intake in his cranium. Also, if the Alliance finds a new show on a different night, what the hell would they call it. WECW Nitro? I am not sold that WECW is the best name for the Alliance.
Those of you who have read my past columns know that I make a lot of baseball references and allusions. Recently, Rickey Henderson stole second base in a game where there was a 12-5 score. Supposedly, he angered the other team because stealing when you are up by seven runs in the 7th inning is a violation of baseball's unwritten rules and codes. For example, you can swing at a 3-0 count when you are up eight runs, or you can show up a pitcher after you hit a home run off of him, by dancing around the bases or etc. I was thinking last night about wrestling's unwritten rules, codes that wrestlers and promoters should not break.
1) Jobbing in your hometown: Some wrestlers believe they should not be booked to lose in their hometown. The perfect example of this is the Bret Hart/Montreal incident, when Vince screwed him. The ironic thing was that Montreal isn't his home. I love Bret Hart, but I think this code. So, Austin can't job in Texas, or Goldberg can't lose in Hotlanta.
2) Stealing another wrestler's catchphrase: This is a cardinal sin for a wrestler to do. When Juventud stole the Rock's catchprases in a poor attempt at humor, he lost credibility with all of his peers. Personally, I thought it was funny, but Juventud is probably drinking Tequila in some Mexican prison on a DUI charge. It's funny because wrestlers can take other wrestlers finishing maneuvers, (Sean O' Haire taking Jeff Hardy, and Edge taking Goldberg) and take no heat.
3) Make a reference toward a dead wrestler: Wrestling fans remember when Golddust made that ill-advised comment about Brian Pillman to further an angle. They also remember what Larry Zbysico said the night after Louie Spicolli died. Dead wrestlers should be mourned, and thought of as real people instead of their alter ego. They should not be used to further an angle.
4) Violence towards women: I really do dislike this unwritten rule. When Randy Savage hit his real-life girlfriend to further an angle, everybody was up in arms about it. I loved it when he did it. Violence against women bring instant heat to a wrestler. If Sean O'Haire were to come in and beat up Trish Stratus with his fists, more power to him, if it meant him getting over. I really don't understand the argument that it is okay for Lita to be attacked, and not the other girls.
5) Racial slurs: I loved the Nation of Domination. I guess you can say that I am a guy who likes heat machines. However, any wrestler who engages in a racial slur should be fined and suspended, possibly fired. Or the booker who writes it in should. The Big Show opened his mouth and said the g-word. As a Chinese man, I don't mind. But I know Koreans, who probably were up in arms about it. If the n-word every found its way on a television screen, believe me that guy who uttered it would be joining the Road Dog in the indy circuit. Since it is an Asian, it's okay. (sarcastically)