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Ian Finlayson




Let's start with another nWo Update

23 Days since nWo's Arrival was announced - I'm not excited yet.

I wanna make a little confession, yesterday I went to see Ocean's Eleven (Which is a really good film). On the bus coming home for a brief couple of minutes I got a little bit excited about the nWo but I quickly got over it. I'm gonna blame it on the large number of Pick 'n' Mix sweets which I ate which left me Ill/Hyper for the rest of the day and made my Mum think I'd been smoking Hash all day.

Here we go with my No Way Out Predictions, this time last year I predicted all the results correctly so this year I'm gonna try and equal it.

Tag Team Turmoil (Hardy Boyz vs Dudley Boyz vs Christian & Lance Storm vs Scotty & Albert vs Billy & Chuck vs APA)

As far as I'm concerned this is going to be a Two Horse Race (Well, I suppose it should be four). It's most likely to be The Dudley Boyz or Chucky & Billy. There are reasons for both of these teams to win and end up getting a Tag Team Title shot at Wrestlemania. For the Dudley Boyz, they are the Top Team in the WWF and so it would make sense for them to be there. Also, they have been in the Tag Team Title Match at both Wrestlemania's they've been in so it's possible they will make it a third this year. As for Chuck & Billy they do seem to have a real push going so it would make sense for them to get to Wrestlemania and do the thing Lenny & Lodi couldn't: Win the Tag Team Titles and become the Top Ambiguously Gay Duo in the Business. Out of two teams I think that Chuck and Billy look most likely to sneak the win so I'm going for them.

Prediction: Chuck & Billy

Tag Team Title Match - Spike & Tazz vs Booker T & Test

I would actually say that out of all the matches on the Pay Per View this is going to be the easiest to predict. We have our two Short Arsed Tag Team Champions going up against the Main Eventer who can't get a clean win over anyone in the Main Event and the Man who can't be Fired. Although Booker T and Test are a bit idle with no real storylines going for them I don't think that winning the Tag Team Titles would help them out at all. I suppose JR will be proclaiming Tazz & Spike winning as a Big Upset but I think it's very likely. This just leaves us with who they will fight Wrestlemania, will it be Chuck & Billy or will they drag out Spike vs Dudleyz for another Month.

Prediction: Tazz & Spike

Intercontinental Title Brass Knuckles on a Pole Match - William Regal vs Edge

Suprisingly this is a hard one to predict. Either men winning can be well justified and there are a few credible endings to the match. It can be argued that since this feud has been going for 4 months it will end at No Way Out but the way the Storyline has proceeded, if Regal wins then Edge will come after him again for revenge. But at the same time I find it unlikely that after only a month Regal will lose the title and move off into another Storyline. I'm gonna go with my two predictions for the most likely end to the match.

1. Edge goes up and gets the Brass Knuckles, Regal buckles him or something like that and get's the brass knuckles and hits him with them.

2. Regal gets another set of Brass Knuckles and knocks Edge out with them then goes up and get's the proper one of the pole and punches an Unconsious Edge with them.

Prediction: Regal wins and a Big Plot Hole as Edge doesn't care anymore that he was cheated out of the title.

Rob Van Dam vs Goldust

I bet if you told Rob Van Dam and Dustin Runnels a year ago that they would be fighting each other on a WWF Pay Per View 12 months later they would have laughed at you, but this is what we have. This all started because Rob was the Rising Star who's life Goldust wanted to ruin. After two weeks of Shattered Dream Productions then another two weeks of run in's the two have their first match together. I don't see this feud ending on Sunday so it's unlikely RVD will get the win. It also seems likely that the WWF will be wanting to give him the win at his first Wrestlemania so I think Goldust will win and the feud will continue to Wrestlemania.

Prediction: Goldust

The Rock vs The Undertaker

Here we have the battle of the man who Doesn't Get Respect and the man who, from what I've heard about the Scorpion King, Doesn't Get any Acting Lessons. The feud started because... umm... The Undertaker... umm... The Rock did something which Irritated the Dead Man. It's actually strange that a Rock match has so little clear build up but I guess that's just because of all that time he's had to spend praying that some miracle will happen to make the Scorpion King good. These two men seem to be stuck in the Random Tag Team Generator together as we've seen them fighting each other more times since the Royal Rumble then is sensible for a feud. Last week the Undertaker gave The Rock a Tombstone Piledriver onto the roof of a limo giving Rocky the chance to travel to the Vatican and Pray with the Pope himself for Box Office Success. I suppose after that Tombstone if the Rock came back and got his ass kicked he'd look like a Pussy so I'm guessing he'll beat The Undertaker.

Prediction: The Rock wins, he will then train, say his prayers, eat his Vitamins and Practice "Hulking Up" in Preparation for his Big Money Feud with the Hulkster.

You may have noticed that except for that last little Hogan Name check my prediction has been nWo free. This is the part of the card where they are almost guaranteed to make an appearance. I'm not sure which match it will be but I will give possible Outcomes for their Appearances.

No. 1 Contendership with Stephanie as Special Referee - Triple H vs Kurt Angle

As we all know Triple H won the Royal Rumble last month but "Evil" Vince McMahon put his title shot on the line against Kurt Angle then on Smackdown "Satan's Evil little girl" Stephanie McMahon inserted herself into the match as Referee. In the past two weeks Triple H and Stephanie's Relationship has been boosted then torn apart again. Last week Stephanie announced her Pregnancy which was then revealed the next week to be fake. I'm not sure how I felt about the discovery on Raw because although I thought it was a stupid storyline I was a little upset from the postion of a Wrestling Fan that they ended an angle so quickly. So now they're seperated and Stephanie is following in Jacqui's footsteps and becoming a Referee. So now she's taking a referee's job for the night leaving Teddy Long to just hang around backstage Pimpin' his Ho's or whatever it is that the Coolest Ref in the business does when he's not being a Referee. According to JR The King is excited to see Stephanie in her Referee's shirt so at least someone is looking forwards to Stephanie the Referee. While I'm talking about Stephanies appearance I just wanna briefly go off on a tangent. I read an interview Vince gave where he mentioned him looking down Stephanies wedding dress on Raw. He said that "he could not help but to look." Can low can Vince get, first he does two angles which involve him kissing young women and now he's perving over his own Daughter. Vince truly is Satan. I'm pretty sure that if I met Stephanie I could resist the Temptation to stare down her top and I'm just an average 17 year old Man. Vince is her Father and he couldn't. But I digress. Writing this I have pretty much left out Kurt Angle. Writing this Storyline the WWF Creative Team have Pretty Much left out Kurt Angle. What can I say about him, he's done a couple of small promo's, had a couple of Tag Team Matches against Triple H and given him a few beatings, that's about it. I'm pretty sure that Triple H will win this because I don't see Kurt Angle in the Wrestlemania Main Event instead of Triple H. The nWo has to be mentioned in this match because of Triple H's relationship with Nash & Hall and the fact Stephanie and Vince (Professional Wrestling's Latest Couple?) will have some tricks up their sleave to get Hunter. I'm going to do a nWo and Non-nWo prediction for the outcome of this match.

nWo - Triple H manages to Overcome Kurt, Stephanie and Vince and win the match. Triple H starts attacking Vince and just before giving him the Pedigree the nWo music hits and the three come out and beat up Hunter like only 2 old men and an Alcoholic can.

Non-nWo - Stephanie makes a mistake and costs Kurt the win she'll then throw and almost Christian like Tantrum as Triple H celebrates. I'm not expecting Triple H to Pedigree Stephanie for the obvious reason that it'll end up like a 21st Century Chyna and her implants will get damaged.

Prediction: Triple H through the Non-nWo Method.

Undisputed Title Match - Chris Jericho vs Stone Cold

Stone Cold got this match after beating Kurt in the final of a Small Tournament. The WWF pretty much ignored this feud until about last week when it picked up again. The winner of this match will probably end up against Triple H at Wrestlemania, as much as I know that Stone Cold vs Triple H will be big money I'm sure that Y2J vs HHH will be what we get. With the exception of the Will Sasso segment they have most exchanged beat downs and they shared a Beer on Valentines Day (Aww, how Sweet). Let's go back to the nWo, as this is the Main Event I think it's most likely they will appear here so the show can end with the three of them. Like before I will give a nWo and Non-nWo prediction.

nWo - During the match the nWo Music will play and the 3 Strooges will come out. They will beat up the two causing a Double DQ allowing Jericho to retain. They will Spray nWo on Jericho's chest and the show will end with the nWo marking's on the WWF Champion. I'm pretty sure that they will start with Branding the Champion and move onto Branding a WWF Icon like Stone Cold Later on.

Non-nWo - This outcome is so unlikely I cant actually think of a interesting way for it to finish so it might just come down to Chris Jericho hitting Stone Cold with a chair to get the pin.

Prediction: Chris Jericho through the nWo Method.

E-Mail me at the address below with your opinions of my predictions and your take on Pervy Vince McMahon

Ian Finlayson

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