FIRST TOPIC- WHERE THE HELL HAVE I BEEN?

I've been waiting for responses to my e-fed bashing columnn. A lot of people responded, either pro or con, but none could seem to come up with any actual e-feds. That's not entirely true. One guy e-mailed me a site that had font at size (after I transferred it to Microsoft Word) 4. I'm not going to read that. Also, after a lot of short, bad columns, I decided to try to do a fairly long, mediocre-bordering-on-average one once in a while. So there you have it.

NEXT TOPIC- PLEASE TELL ME THAT HAPPENED

Let's all skip the last month or so of WWE programming. Hell, let's all skip everything through the Dreamer-UT match (which sucked on so many levels). Somebody, please tell me that the second-to-the-last segment of Raw happened. Kevin Nash did come out. Kevin Nash did say a lot of stuff about things not living up to their hype. Kevin Nash did make me think that he was closing down the nWo because they weren't the "deadly poison" they were supposed to be. Kevin Nash did introduce a new member of the nWo. For the first time in well over a year, "Sexy Boy" played on a WWF/E show. The showstopper did come out. The Icon did appear. The main event did show his face. And Shawn Michaels did look better than I can ever remember him. He is thinner than he was during the glory days of HBK. If anything, he looks MORE youthful. He really did have a heart-wrenching-for-those-who-like-to-think-they-know-something-about-the-Kliq moment with Kevin Nash. They embraced. They did the jump-high five thing that I'm supposed to remember (and think I do). They did the Wolfpac thing. HBK did the double-bicep bended leg thing (at least thrice). Shawn Michaels is back.

The man who wrestled in one of my all-time favorite matches at WrestleMania X with Razor Ramon is back.

The man who wrestled in another one of my all-time favorite matches with the Undertaker in the original HITC is back.

The man who admitted that he knew about Montreal not four days ago is back.

The Heartbreak Kid is back.

And soon, I hope, the Savage elbow will be back.

And soon, I hope, the band will warm up again.

And soon, I hope, HBK will be strumming the notes of Sweet Chin Music again.

And soon, I think we all hope, we won't look back on this as another example of washed-up legends trying to take one more shot at glory (yeah, Hogan) (yeah, Hall)

He think's he's keen.
He knows he's sexy.
He's got the moves that drives the girls wild.
Let's just hope he also knows not to get drunk.