MORE HOT WWF NEWZ!!!
I am back wit more Hizzott Newz!!!!! And teh big newz is that the NWO CANCER has spread backstage in the WWF!!!! And The NWO has shown up FIVE HOURS LATE for every show in GIANT LIMOS and there always DRUNK OFF THERE ASSES!!!!! And Nash called Tazz and Spike "The orange and vanilla midgets"!!!!!! And in todays Hot Newz I'll have an EXCLUSIVE interview with Scott Hall to get to the bottom of this!!!
Billy and Chuck are the new FAG team champions (lol!) and they filmed a skit for Raw where they go to a GAY BAR! And then the Akolytes come in and Brad Shaw dances with a man in DRAG! And Farook says "damn!". And then Billy says "why are there no chix here?" and they run away. And Farook and Brad Shaw beat up all the gayz!!!
The WWF have also recorded a skit where Mr Perfect is playing golf with Tiger Woods! ANd he hits Tiger with his golf club and CHEATS TO WIN~! then sayz "I DID IT! I'M MR PERFECT YOU LOSER, I'M PERFECT, YOUR NOT! I SHOUT A LOT!". Lol, he doesn't really say he shouts a lot but he does shout a lot if youve noticed that.
The WWF is trying to come up with new namez for Chris Benwah when he comes back to give him more charisma. Some of the namez they is considering are "The Canadian Dream", "The Party Animal", "The Child Crippler" (He'll start hitting children!) and "The Rabid Testicle"!!!
They used a stunt double of the Rock on Raw because the real Rock refused to take the Razors Edge and teh Jacknife and the Big leg and get crushed by a truck. Waht a wuss!
The WWF is trynig to get everyone on the rooster onto the Wrestlemania card including JR and The King!!! and theyll fight Spike n' Tazz and this will be set up on Raw when Tazz sez to JR "I'd punch your head off and choke your ass out but it looks like GOD beat me to it!" and JR kicks him in the bollz and breaks a candy jar over his head and jumps off the ring apron with a big splash (!!!) and sez "DON'T TAKE THE LORDS NAME IN VAIN, YOU DAMN STINKING BASTARD! IN THE NAME OF THE FATHER, SON AND THE HOLY GHOST I WILL BEAT YOU LIKE A GOVERNMENT MULE AT WRESTLEMANIA!!!".
my main dawg NEKROPHILLE told me that Rick Flair versus Undertaker will be a "hip replacement" match. And I think he mean that's because they are replacing hip young wrestlers on the show!!!
DDP is never on tv because everyone hates him.
Who bettar than Kanyon? EVERYBODY!!!! (This isn't newz just a hard hitting opinion!!)
Rikishi and Big Show are off tv because they are in FAT CAMP! Adn you can get updates on there weight loss every week in the Ross Report!!
OMG EVEN MORE SIGN IDEAZ, MOTHAFUCK!
THAT'S GOTTA BE (SPO)KANE!!! - to hold in Spokane Washington!
Billy and Chuck love to fuck...EACH OTHER!!!!
Stephanie is fat!!! - she got implants because someone held a sign saying her boobz are saggy, so maybe we can make her get liposuction!!!!
JR measured Albert's HEAD lol!
I pinned Maven in the parking lot and am the Hardcore champion!!!
I totaled my underwear!
I'd rather be on Lenny Lane in Lodi, New Jersey!
Bring back the Blue Meanie as Goldust's boyfriend!!!!
Thanx go out again to Mister Stumpy 4 his hizzelp!!!!
Now for this weekzz interview with Scott Hall!!!!
Me: Hey yo!
Hall: Hey yo.
Me: Lol! Are you drunk, dood?
Hall: Of course not...
Me: It's okay dood, I interviewed the SandMan a few weeks ago and he was drunk off his ass!! I don't mind talking to a big alocoholic loser!
Hall: I'm not drunk!
Me: Okay, I believe you....lol!
Hall: Can we get on with this?
Me: Okay Chico! Lol! You ooze machismo!
Hall: You said you were going to ask me about Nash and Hogan....
Me: Oh yeah! What's Big Poochie like in real life?
Me: Nash you dumbass! I bet you don't even surf the internet, you stupid old man!
Hall: No, I actually have a life.
Me: Yeah...A LIFE OF CRIME! lol! Anyway, is Nash really evil in real life I bet he is is he?
Hall: He's my best friend. He helped me get off the booze.
Me: Are you two more than friends?
Hall: Are you implying that...
Me: THAT YOUR HOMOGAYS YEAH!
Hall: For fuck's sake...
Me: Let's talk about your arrests! How many times have you been arrested?
Hall: I can't remember...
Me: OMG, I bet you've been arrested more times than Mick Foleys been hit by chairs!
Hall: I doubt it...
Me: What do you think is your funniest arrest?
Hall: None of them were funny, man.
Me: Yes they were! Remember when you couldn't pay your taxi cab fee and you smashed the taxi up? Or when you keyed a limo? Or that time you were supposed to pick your kids up but you drove right past them because you were so out of it? I was ROTFLMAO at all of them!
Hall: You find the misfortune of others funny?
Me: Yeah! Now that your back in the WWF, maybe they should have a angle whetre you feel up Mae Young! We all know you like to feel up old women, after all!
Hall: Maybe they should do an angle where some little punk is interviewing me and talking trash, so I give him the Razor's Edge?
Me: Yeah, that would ROCK! Are you going to renew your heated feud with that homo Goldust?
Hall: Only if he starts hitting on me again!
Me: You big homophobic! Is Eric bischoff going to be involved in the NWO angle.
Hall: I really can't say...
Me: You can't say because he will be involved!?
Hall: I really can't say...
Me: OMG! He IS going to be involved! Bischoff versus McMahon at WrestleMania!!!!!!!
Hall: Yes...SHANE McMahon!
Hall: Sorry, it just slipped out! Put it on your site, kid. Everyone will be so impressed with you when it happens.
Me: I will do taht! You arent so bad after all! But is it true that you once took a shit on a plate on an airplane and then gave the shit to Sunny?
Hall: Yeah, that was funny.
BIZZACK SIZZON WIZZITH MIZZORE HIZZOT NIZZEWZ FIZZOR MIZZY HIZZOMIEZ (LIZZOL!)!!!!
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