NOT JUST PURORESU LOVE
So I'm looking at Slash Wrestling to see what's new and I read a report about the WWE live event in Washington, D.C. and much to my shock, the author actually checked out my live report of the Madison Square Garden live event. Do you happen to know what this means? This means that somebody has actually checked out my column. Amazing yet true! With some hope and blackmailing, maybe I can get readers into the double digit column. Then, look out CRZ and watch your back, Scott Keith! Ok, maybe not....oh by the way, this is another edition of "Not Just Puroresu Love." I would be your paragon of virtue, but I don't feel like it this week.
Before we start, this column is not powered by....wait for it....RUTHLESS AGGRESSION!
KEIJI MUTOH TO WRESTLE THREE TIMES IN ONE NIGHT
And no, it's not like Jeff Jarrett on that one episode of Nitro.....or the time Chris Jericho wrestled against Kurt Angle, the Big Show, and Chris Benoit on RAW in New Jersey.
All Japan is holding an event on 7/20 and recently put the matchmaking plans to the fans. Via the way of "voting", Mutoh will wrestle three times in one night. In a six-man tag team match, Mutoh will team with Mexican legends (read: fossils) Mil Mascaras and Dos Caras to take on Abdullah the Butcher, Gran Hamada, and Gran Naniwa. In a one-on-one match, Mutoh will use his Kokushi gimmick against former WWE developmental talent and a darn good guy Kaz Hayashi. Finally, in a battle of even more crazy gimmicks, Mutoh will use his revamped MUTA gimmick (looks like Spiderman, I kid you not) against Foolish Orphan Zero Knight, the nutty alter ego of my Japanese god, Satoshi Kojima.
Good luck, Mutoh. So much for giving his about-to-break knees a rest.
THE DEVELOPMENTAL TALENTS INVADE
That's all nice and dandy, don't get me wrong, but are you like me and miss the days where they spent weeks and weeks hyping up a new superstar? I'm not talking about Rey Mysterio, Jr. because everybody knows who he is already. I remember when you saw vignettes about incoming wrestlers in the 90s like Skinner, Tatanka, Ahmed Johnson, Duke Droese, Jeff Jarrett, Razor Ramon, and some guy named Hunter Hearst Helmsley. These developmental talents have a lot of skill and ability, but they need some sort of character.
(Not Deacon) Batista can be a pretty good player in the upcoming years. Even though he hasn't worked in the WWE until the past couple of years, there is obviously potential in the guy formely known as Leviathan. He has a lot of raw intensity, something that I haven't seen since possibly when Ahmed Johnson first debuted.
Call me nuts, but I always liked Sean O'Haire out of all the Natural Born Thrillers. If you want to give out the "Whacko" gimmick to somebody, don't give it to Steven Richards or Shawn Stasiak. O'Haire has "that" look and has some pretty good skills, with his fighting background and all. I think he does need some work because his match with Justin Credible on Heat a couple of weeks ago seemed to move in slow motion at some points.
At least Jamie Noble was given a character of the trailer park trash punk with the trailer park trash girlfriend Nidia. I think he'll eventually get over with the gimmick, especially with the vignettes about his new home with the luxurious "running water" feature. His match with the Hurricane on Velocity was really really good and showed what he can do in the ring. Slowly but surely, the Cruiserweight Division is starting to build.
John Cena has looked pretty darn good the past couple of weeks on Smackdown against two established heel main eventers in Kurt Angle and Chris Jericho. Even without a win in the WWE, Cena's already getting over with his in-ring work and his seemingly no-fear attitude. I already like him a lot better than Randy Orton, who isn't that bad, but just doesn't do it for me. Orton just has that "vanilla" to him, if you will.
And anybody but me get a kick out of how Rob Conway played Randy Orton like a fool a couple of weeks ago on Velocity, faking that injury and just punting Orton's head into the first row? Now that's the way to get heel heat, my friends...
CHRIS F'N BENOIT IS BACK....ROCK WHO?
Granted the Rock means money and ratings and new catchphrases, but at least Chris Benoit is back, kicking ass, and taking names. Benoit and Eddie Guerrero are the only two Radicalz left, with Dean Malenko retired and Perry Saturn on the injured list. I still must be the only person in the world who has BOTH Radicalz T-Shirts sold by the WWE.
Oh, and the Rock returns to Smackdown this Tuesday in Atlantic City, NJ. Again. For another couple of weeks until he starts filming his movie. Repeat in about half a year. Repeat until the Rock makes millions....and millions of dollars and decides to dump Vince McMahon and the crack booking committee for kissing ass Hollywood.
RAW RETURNS TO NEW JERSEY A WEEK FROM MONDAY
I will be there live so you can expect a report sometime next week, complete with Sunday Night Heat taping results and off-camera happenings. Actually, it will be a very special Sunday Night Heat because it will be the U.K. version since Vengeance will be that upcoming Sunday. Aren't I thrilled now that I have tickets.
VENGEANCE IS COMING.....WITHOUT THE AUSTIN PROMOTIONAL POSTER
Now it has Edge on it....darn it, they're just pushing him down our throats, now aren't they?
The theme song for Vengeance is Trust Company's "Downfall." How ironic.
The main event is currently Taker defending the WWE "Currently Disputed" Title against the Rock, but Kurt Angle might be joining them for a little three-way soon. As if you needed more proof that Kurt Angle is the Wrestler of the Seven Month Year so far....he may have been the only one to have a decent match with the Undertaker since the Dead Man became the champion back at Judgment Day.
Rob Van Dam takes on Brock Lesnar in a match that may or may not be for the Intercontinental Title or Brock's title shot at Summerslam. If you're me, you're praying they throw in both stipulations and give RVD a shot at the title at the summer spectacular, but it seems like Vince and company seem to be hell-bent on giving us nothing but Brock.
Edge takes on Chris Jericho in the battle of the glass ceiling breakers. Nice little feud that these two are having. If the WWE is thinking about giving Edge the ball, maybe now's the time. Jericho would be well-suited to lead the WWE version of Team Canada to make it a complete faction. A three-man team of Christian, Lance Storm, and Test just doesn't seem too strong to be quite honest. At least Jericho would give them some credibility.
The rest of the card will be announced five minutes before the PPV starts on Sunday Night Heat. Give us D'Lo Brown!
And that takes care of this column this week. Next week will be the report of the 7-15-02 RAW in New Jersey. Until then....they refuse to see the change in me, why won't they wake up?
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