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Jim Ross, Jr.

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THE JIM ROSS, JR. REPORT
November 30, 2001

Good Ol' J.R., Jr. is back again with thoughts not from under my stolen Sooners helmet, or any of my cowboy hats, or my Albany Polecats baseball cap, but from my ass! No, really! I cannot make this stuff up, but my ass can!

Smackdown was better than Raw this week. More of a focus was placed on Vengeance with a few matches being signed. I can't excuse the Vince McMahon "Kiss My Ass Club" angle with Trish Stratus. If sponsors start pulling out again, Vince has no one to blame but himself.

Undertaker is prepared to take his game up another level. Booker Red is being counted on to produce in some big time matches in his new role. I enjoyed 'Taker's promos on Raw and Smackdown and thought it was some of his best work in months. His match with Tazz was a good start for his new character.

Tazz, whether he likes it or not, will continue to be the Barry Horowitz of the new millennium. He'll be seeing more canvas than Rembrandt.

Don't believe what the sheets are saying. Triple H is making his return by doing a run-in during the main event of Vengeance.

When it comes to acting, the Hardy Boyz and Lita make great wrestlers. I've seen porn stars show more range.

Why should I feel sorry for Jim Ross? Good Ol' J.R. has been a company man for a long time and that wasn't the first time he's kissed Vince's ass and it sure won't be the last time either. Who cares if his legitimite daughters were backstage? That's what you get for taking your daughters to work. Why do you neglect me like this, daddy?

No word on whether Diamond Dallas Page has been searching for a new place of employment. I'm sure there is a McDonald's in the Atlanta area that is more than willing to offer him a position. And if that falls through, he can join that new start-up with all those oldtimers. Or, if he doesn't want to embarrass himself by joining that group, he can always pimp out that sex kitten of a wife he has.

Stone Cold Steve Austin cut a really good promo on Smackdown. Austin is a much better fan favorite than the rulebreaker he was portraying for the last 7 months. It's nice to see Stone Cold find a way to tie-in his popular "What?" catch phrase into his promos so the fans can interact with the Rattlesnake. I thought it was quite humorous the way the fans were taunting Kurt Angle with "What?"

Rikishi is still a very large man. There is no timetable for his return to Federation television.

Scott Steiner's AOL Time Warner contract is up tommorrow. We may see Scotty make his WWF debut hopefully at the 1/7 Raw from MSG.

Big Show & Kane could make one helluva slobberknocker tag team if you ask me. This tag team showed some bowling shoe tendencies on Smackdown, but I believe these two will be given enough time to work out any communication problems they may have.

It looks like Edge could possibly be receving a brush with greatness this coming Monday night on Raw.

Does anybody know if Kevin Nash is still "over" in Siberia?

It's been quite refreshing to watch Federation television without the presence of Shane McMahon and Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley. However, their television time has not been given to talent, but Vince's ass. That's right, the next big thing in sports entertainment is Vince's ass. I seemingly can't stop talking about it. It's THAT big. Nevermind the plan to debut Vince's forgotten billionaire brother as the financial backer behind the WCW/ECW InVasion. Vince's ass is just too big of a star to be denied. You can't stop it, you can only hope to contain it.

I was saddened upon hearing about the death of George Harrison. He's in the Lord's hands now thankfully. I'll be sure to pay homage to George by doing a rendition of "Got My Mind Set On You" at the bar Saturday night.

The work on Good Ol' J.R., Jr.'s steak sauce is progressing better than expected. I'm setting a realistic goal of Summer '03, but I would like to have it out by the first of '03. Folks, I know that sounds laughable, but my dear old daddy has been talking about his BBQ sauce for 3 years and it still isn't on the shelves of my local grocer.

I honestly believe the Vince McMahon "Kiss My Ass Club" angles will go down as some of the most memorable moments in WWF history. Future generations of sports entertainment fans will hear from their fathers and grandfathers about those nights Vince dropped his drawers. "What's the point," you ask? The fans who jumped on the bandwagon back in '98 and '99 have been conditioned that this is what pro wrestling is about. That's why fans don't pop for wrestling anymore. Highspots, nearfalls, and promos is all fans are popping for. In 2000, I thought the WWF was making great strides in attempting to train fans to pop for wrestling, but the focus was eventually lost with the Kurt Angle-Triple H-Stephanie soap opera. I believe the direction the Federation ultimately needs to take is one that puts a greater focus on the actions during a wrestling match. God knows the WWF has enough talent capable of telling a great in-ring story.

Hey Vince, kiss my ass.

That's my prerogative.

J.R., Jr.
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