DEEP THOUGHTS AND EMPTYING THE MAILBAG
Deep Thought One
So Jeff Hardy wants to be "more extreme"? Here's a thought for you Jeff. How about coming to the ring in a clean tank top and jeans. Don't spatter yourself with that paint that glows in the black light but makes you look covered in dried man gravy. And for the love of God, stop the spastic dancing! As for your ringwork, highspots enhance a match. They do not make up for crap. Watch a Benoit match and take notes.
Deep Thought Two
Tommy Dreamer is the new Mick Foley. Either he's grossing people out, taking killer bumps, or a combination of both. Up next is his new book, "Heyman Still Owes Me Money".
Deep Thought Three
Now it all makes sense. What, you ask, what makes sense? Taker does. As a heel, the no selling makes sense. It also makes for boring matches. I've wondered if he no sells in real life. When he was born and the doctor spanked him, did he cry or just stare back at him? What if you whacked him with a hockey stick in the kidneys? Gave him a huricarana onto a flaming table covered with broken glass? Damn you Calloway, show some pain! Make a face once in a while!
Deep Thought Four
Nidia was the Hurricane's stalker? Was there no other way to bring her and Noble in? That segment reeked of Russo to the point I thought I saw David Arquette in the background. Note to self, Clorox brain. Twice.
Deep Thought Five
The Arn Anderson/Austin segment on Raw. I had a AIM debate on this topic as it happened. I know he really wasn't urinated on. I still felt bad for him. How long has he been in the business and what is his reward? My friend argued that Arn was doing what he loved and could leave any time. My opinion? First off, I don't care who you are, have some dignity. Second, what else is Arn going to do? I don 't think he's made that much money. What would his resume say? "Member of the Four Horsemen?" "Flair's running buddy?" Face it, wrestling is his career. As someone who managed to stay around as long as he has, he should be treated with some respect. Man who takes beatings, ok. Man who gets pseudo pissed on, no.
Deep Thought Six
The idea of a Benoit/Guerrero vs RVD/Austin Fatal Four Way match at the next PPV gets me weak in the knees. No gimmicks beyond the four guys. No runins. Just a match as pure as can be in the WWE. It would help elevate everyone involved. If it's half as good as the Guerrero/RVD ladder match on Raw, I will be vindicated. Ahhh, sweet vindication.
Emptying the Mailbag "the hardy girls suck. they are gay" email@example.com
Wow. You have changed my mind completely with your well thought out debate and reckless disregard of the shift key. Shine on you crazy diamond! Play in traffic! Run with scissors! Lean the chair WAY back!
"Montreal Screwjob-work or shoot?" Craig from CT
Shoot. If it was a work, someone would have come clean by now. Bret HATES Vince. After Owen died, Bret would have said something. What better way to screw with the man you hate than tell the world it was all a charade?
" How do you explain Rob Van Dam's popularity?" Manny from NYC
Easy. He's got a different style than the majority of the WWE. That alone would probably get him some pops. He's also a good looking man, which doesn't hurt to get him the casual female fanbase. The combination is a winning one. After all, there have been handsome men in the WWF before who didn't get over until their style changed. Prime example was the first version of the Rock. For the newbies, ever see a "Die Rocky Die" sign and wonder what is was about? When the Rock first came to the then WWF, he was Rocky Malvia. A cheesy good guy pushed down the fans throats until they snapped. Ross called him "Blue Chipper" for some reason. It was ugly. It wasn't until he turned heel that he started winning over the fans. I think if/when he comes back, a heel turn would be great. Oh yeah, RVD was the topic. Rob Van Dam, innovative and attractive. Plus, you have to love the implied stoner gimmick. If Russo was still around, RVD would carry a Graphix six foot bong to the ring and use it to Hulk up.
"Prove your a girl" somerandonAIMmoron
Hmm, ok. How exactly do I do that via AIM, slapnuts? Reject you? That would be proving my literacy and ability to determine you are a moron.
Until next time, I give it another month until Stephanie returns...