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/25 November 2000

WWF Jakked by The Cubs Fan

25.11.0

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Wow! Gangrel's still in there! I'm shocked and surprised. Having now seen the full into, Big Show is gone a little more, with Mick Foley (who wasn't in this at all before) taking his place.

Essa Rios (w/o Lita) and Funaki (w/o Lita) vs Hardy Boys (w/o Lita) - You know, this could be a good match. Jeff grooves to his music. Michael Hayes sure sounds like Kevin Kelly this week. Kelly says that the Hardys might be at a disadvantage, never having faced the combo of Funaki and Essa (ignoring that Funaki and Essa aren't used to the combo of Funaki and Essa.) Funaki and Matt start this one. Kick, headlock, off the ropes, Matt with a shoulderblock, off the ropes, over the drop down, under the leapfrog, quick turn around, kick, off the ropes, dropkick by Funaki. Off the ropes, flying headscissors. Right, right, right, celebrate, Matt turns it around with five punches and three kicks. Corner whip, clothesline. Tag to Jeff. Double team kick down in the corner. Armbar by Jeff, he flips Funaki to the ground, Funaki flips back up to reverse it and gets clotheslined. Jeff sells his own arm and grabs his ribs. Eye poke, tag to Essa who comes in with shin kicks. Right, right, whip, head down too soon, Essa with a kick, off the ropes, jumping right into a dropkick. Right by Jeff, whip, handstand bounce off the ropes and a flip over Jeff, topped with a spin kick. Dropkick to the head, taunt to Jeff. Essa remembers his last angle, even if the announcers don't. Essa with a couple punches, choke in the corner. Corner whip, reversed motion causing Jeff to go turn around and go back in the corner he just came out, kip up, Essa catches him on his shoulder, running powerslam is escaped as Jeff falls behind and pushes Essa into the corner. Jeff charges in, flipped to the apron, pulling Essa down by the hair and a messy looking rope flip moonsault for 2. Jeff doesn't seem right. Tag to Matt, double leg trip, double Ocean Cyclone Suplex. Nice. That'll be 2, as Funaki breaks it up just in time. Whip, reversed, Funaki tries to get a punch in but Matt blocks it and hits one of his own, but Essa comes from behind with a dropkick to knock Matt out of the ring.  Running double ax handle off the apron from Funaki, Jeff over to help his brother, Funaki escapes just as Essa hits the running over-the-turnbuckle tope on to both Hardys. Always good. Matt thrown back in, big back suplex for Matt. Hardy Boys will be in action on Heat. Corner whip for Matt, tag to Funaki, Essa charges again, sliding dropkick misses Matt when he gets his feet up, but Essa slides all the way out and crotches Matt on the turnbuckle post. Funaki slides in with a dropkick for Matt's face. Funaki pulls him up to his feet, whip, sleeper, reversed by Matt, sleeper of his own, in to a sleeper neckbreaker. Coach and Kelly are happy about getting Lillian Garcia in the Smackdown food fight. Tag to Essa, tag to Jeff, Jeff with a flying forearm for Essa, punch for Funaki, takedown for Essa and a double legdrop in between the legs, Funaki tries a running cross body but Jeff ducks and Essa eats it. Cover by Jeff, but Funaki breaks it up. Matt throws Funaki in one corner and works him over, but Funaki reverses it. Meanwhile, Jeff lifts Essa up for a suplex, but Essa falls behind and cradles Jeff for a pin - kickout at 2. Matt's back in control, and attacks Essa behind. Corner whip, Poetry in Motion. They ditch their shirts, Kick to the stomach for Essa, Twist of Fate, Swanton Bomb. Jeff holds his ribs, Matt takes care of Funaki, and that's 3. (6:10)

Your hosts are Kevin Kelly and Jonathon Coachman and I miss Michael Hayes. They talk about the Steve Austin and the controversy in the title match. Kelly breaks the rules by mentioning something that was revealed on RAW (the imposter being Kurt's brother) in the 'live' shot. 

Still to come, the Undertaker was seeing double, and Too Cool get down, but next, Steve Austin might have gone too far. 

Survivor Series/Triple H/Steve Austin/Steph recap runs really long. This is the video package they didn't edit this week, so we get lots of the opening RAW speech. "I'm sure the tranquil Steve Austin will agree to put this all behind us" - I mean, what the heck is Steph thinking? I watched people count ballots on MSNBC during this. It's STILL going. I'm only watching video packages in fast forward now. (9:16)

Coming up on Jakked, Raven, and a look at the Angle Brothers. But next, Too Cool is in the hizzouse.

Too Cool vs Vito Denucci/Chris Nelson - Lockup, Vito pushes Scotty in the corner, right, right, celebrate. Scotty out with punches and kicks in the opposite corner.  There's a shop, and another. Snap suplex. Tag, double whip, double boot to the midsection, scary looking double powerbomb. Aren't you supposed to put the hand under the head, not on top? I guess the Grandmaster knows better than me, but that's what they do in THQ games. Chris Nelson in, Chris Nelson thrown out. Head shot to the turnbuckle, whip, head down too soon, kick to the head. Tag to Nelson who runs in to a hiptoss. Headlock, off the ropes, shoulderblock, Running Man, off the ropes, ducks the clothesline, through the legs, kick is caught, enzuiguri is not. Sexay goes for a slingshot but gets clotheslined by Vito. Shot to back by Chris, tag to Vito, Nelson with the abdominal stretch and Vito with a kick. Bodyslam. Second rope splash misses. Hot tag to Scotty. Punches for each person, double whip, kick the midsection, rolling kick by Scotty. Double corner whip on Chris. Vito's whipped into the corner, rebound out, bulldog, W-O-R-M. GMS up top - Hip Hop Drop (3:47) Too Cool get the extended 1:10 dance segment.

Still to come, Al Snow will try to give someone Head, but next, a story of two brothers and a dead guy.

Stills recap the Survivor Series match and those pants, leading into a recap from last Monday. (2:57)

Still to come, the unpredictable Al Snow, but Raven's next.

You can buy the new Chris Jericho and Kurt Angle videos now for $14.95! (Or you can just watch them for $6 when they turn up on WWF Fanatics in a couple months.)

The Castrol GTX Drive Hard Slam of the Week was Rikishi's post match beating of the Rock

Raven vs a highlight reel - There's Raven turning on Tazz from Smackdown two weeks ago.

Raven vs Mike Sullivan - Lockup, pushes in the corner, right, right, shoulder to the gut, shoulder to the gut, right, right, right, lots of boots in the corner. Lots more boots. Ref Mike Sparks pulls him out. Corner whip, slingshot clothesline by Raven. Right, Sullivan with lefts, whip, revered, clothesline misses, flying forearm by Sullivan for 2. Sullivan with a body slam, up top, flying headbutt misses. Raven throws him out, Russian legsweep into the barrier. Sullivan thrown in - stun gun. Raven with the Bronco Billie special (corner whip, clothesline, bulldog) for 2. Raven with that wacky sitting hangman's choke/chinlock variation he likes using. He yells "What about Raven?" but the announcer are too busy hyping other stuff Sullivan fights back with lefts. Corner whip, corner splash, corner whip, corner splash - into boots. Set up for the DDT, Evenflow. (3:12) "GET UP! WHAT ABOUT ME? WHAT ABOUT RAVEN?" 

WWF Don't Try This At Home promo.

Lugz Boot of the Week is a 3D on Goodfather, Steven Richards causing a DQ or Steven Richards getting Superbombed through a table. You pick.

Al Snow (w/o facial hair, w/Head) vs Scoot Anders (already in the ring) - Dude looks WEIRD without that. Scoot may be the WXO's Black Nature Boy - he works using that name elsewhere. Armbar waistlock, reversed, reversed into an armbar by Al. Scoot Andrews pushes him into the corner, right, right, Al reverses with lots of rights. Corner whip, reversed, Al slides under overhead belly to back. Al looks at head, covers, 2 count. Whip, clotheslined, duck under Scott with a flying forearm, toss down by the head, toss down by the head, taunt the crowd, right, whip, dropkick, taunt. Forearm to the head, whip, high dropkick. Al falls out of the ring - Scott with a sliding dropkick that misses, Al's clothesline doesn't. Time for the inverted powerbomb on the ramp. Throw back in, Al cover, 2 count. Al points to Head - the fans like the idea, ref Jimmy Korderas doesn't. Scoot with an eye poke, elbow, right, right, corner whip, slide stop by Al and a clothesline, Whip, backdrop. Snow Plow! It's been a while. Kelly even calls it. Al celebrates...accidentally poking Korderas in the eye. Hmm...distracted referee, time for head, how convenient. Kelly: "We know [all referees] are blind." Head shot, cover, win. (3:53)

Tomorrow night, Chyna will beat up Tazz on Heat. Also, the tag team titles on the line as Bull and Goodfather take on Too Cool. Steph will also be there, with comments on Steve Austin and her husband.

The Cubs Fan
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Guest column text copyright (C) 2000 by the individual author and used with permission