/23 December 2000
WWF Jakked by The Cubs Fan
"WWF Jakked 208
Air Channel 1 Only!
Star Recording now!"
Hey, right on time, the WWF intro. This is better then starting late.
Last Monday, Vince McMahon's back and Mick Foley's fired and other stuff happened.
Here's the normal intro. They changed stuff around again just to annoy me, but I'm not checking this week.
K-Kwik and Suspended Road Dogg vs Lo Down - the way I want to remember him is in a blue knit cap wearing a funny looking jersey, so thanks. My last memory of Razor Ramon was having a big "Suspended" label over his name in tag team brackets, so it could be worse. The hosts are Michael Hayes and Jonathon Coachman and they talk about the McMahons. Lo Down (Chaz with purple, D'Lo with green) prays. Hays warns Coachman about question management. K-Kwik and Road Dogg attack the still praying three some from behind (for shame!) but Road Dogg gets beat down. When it sorts out, it's a heel kick on Road Dogg. Tag to Chaz. Sidewalk slam legdrop combo. Kick to the back, throw outside. Tiger gets in a couple stomps and D' Lo throws him back in the ring. Cover by Chaz, 2 count. Road Dogg is looking out of it, but then, he's supposed to at this point. Kick to the gut, kick to the gut, up, corner whip , very slowly out and a clothesline. Tag to D'Lo, Chaz holds him for a gut to the midsection. Shot to the back. Whip, Road Dogg with a messy Sunset flip but the ref's distracted by Chaz, now he's around, 2. Shot for Road Dogg, shot for Kwik. Kwik argues, D'Lo stomps. Road Dogg is moving slower than usual. Tag To Chaz. Double whip, double clothesline is to high, Road Dogg just kinda collapsed into a double clothesline. Tag to Kwik, Right for Chaz, Right for D'Lo, dancing right for for Chaz, Flatliner (or Downward Spiral or whatever you'd like to call it) on D'Lo, Duck of a clothesline, front suplex on Chaz, one, two, Tiger's in to break it up. (DQ 3:41) A screw job finish on this show? Road Dogg with the funky punches (but not the big one), whip, double hiptoss. Rowdy elbow is broken up by D'Lo and Chaz. Double whip, D'Lo's slightly tossed out (D'Lo doing most of the work by himself), Kwik dropkicks Chaz out. Hayes says Road Dogg is out on his feet. Road Dogg does some robot dancing. Bye Road Dogg.
The Rock got a title, Scotty 2 Hotty will give some the Worm, but next, it's not a nice holiday for Mick Foley.
One frozen pizza a month is the upper end of the scale? Ha. Someone hasn't lived the LIFE.
Jakked is brought to you by Shopzone and Chef Boyardee and 1-800-Collect
Video package highlights the Linda/Steph/Vince/Foley drama. Moving on, here's Stone Cold's adventure as a ref. See, Vince has a great memory - he remembers that Austin did the same thing when he got the ref gig at Breakdown, so he set him up. Maybe Kane did too. Or maybe it's just a vast coincidence. (8:12)
The (dot) product of all this is that, instead of going to the Angle household to celebrate Christmas, Kane will make do by wrestling Steve Austin.
Raven's here later on, and was Rock and Taker's first defense their last? But next, Scotty is in the house.
A Royale Rumble replay - Bret Hart (huh?) has the Sharpshooter on Steve Austin, but Jerry Lawler's music plays. He excuses himself from the desk, goes in the ring, and gets punched out of it by Bret Hart. Maybe they WILL show the Luger/Bret one.
Scotty 2 Hotty (all by himself) vs Chuck Coates (also by himself, already in the ring) - We talk about WM and the Rumble. Scotty starts up the clap. Lockup, Armbar, reversed, Scotty flips to his feet, kips up, armbar, headlock, raise the roof, off the ropes, shoulderblock. Celebrate, off the ropes, off the ropes, under the leapfrog, hiptoss. Scotty charges, backdropped to the floor but lands on his feet. Pulling Coates out, chop, punch, throw back in. Kick to the midsection, flip in the ring and over Coates, off the far ropes and a running forearm. Cover, 2. Kick, kick, right, duck a clothesline and Coates hits a dropkick. Coates with a right. Shot to the back. Choke in the corner. Kick, kick, kick, choke. Right. Right, right. Scotty turns it around, lots of punches, corner whip, reversed, Scotty falls down in the corner. Coats dances. Whip, sunset flip by Scotty for 2. Coates up, clothesline, cover for 2. Right, back scrap. Kick to the gut. Whip, clothesline missed gut shot gut shot gut shot, reverse neckbreaker. Exchange for punches, right, right, big right from Scotty. He drops the lid, whip, backdrop. Whip, reversed, tilt-a-whirl slam by Coates, managing to do something noteworthy. Coates slowly to the top, revs his ending, big elbow misses. Scotty off the ropes, bulldog. W-O-R-M, He covers, that's the win. (4:51) Hmm - a move that the fans really like, and has almost nil chance of injuring either person - that's one bad move.
Coming up, Essa Rios, but next, the story of the tag team titles.
They're already calling him "The former WWF commissioner" in the Fanatic ad - that's attention to detail.
1-800-Collect Slam of the week was the Last Ride on Christian and the People's Elbow on Edge that got them the tag titles.
That takes us to Last Thursday, where Christian and Edge got a rematch, but were worried. The story, as Hayes tries to paint it, is that Angle may or may not have been told by Vince to be special referee. Did Kurt Angle "go into business for himself"? (4:41)
Still to come, Essa Rios in action, but next, it's Raven.
Raw is on TNN. Really. No lie. I'll trade my TNN for your Cartoon Network, I think.
The Royal Rumble is brought to you by 1-800-Collect and some jobber's music.
Raven (no, not his music) vs Romeo Bliss (already in the ring) - Coach is visiting all the XFL teams on Livewire. Bliss shakes his butt, which Hayes and I find mildly disturbing. Punches in bunches in the corner by Raven. Corner whip and Romeo flies all the way to the floor for no particular reason. Raven's "I didn't know I was that strong." Sliding dropkick for Bliss, and here's the Russian legsweep in the barrier. Snap mare, face yank, sitting hanging neckbreaker. Corner whip, bounce out into Raven's clothesline. Breaking news: WWF Volume 5 will be out in February. Warning: Rock may sing. Corner whip, shoulder to the gut, Corner whip, shoulder to the gut. Bliss takes control in the corner, right, right, corner whip, running into a boot, Romeo roll him up for 2. Romeo with the bulldog! Cover, 2. Whip, reversed, head down too soon, kick to the head to Raven, but Raven is up with a clothesline. Pick up by the hair, front facelock, Evenflow. We're talking about People magazine and ESPN.com, but Raven's got the pin. (3:28) Hey, that's Tazz and Kelly over at the desk - this Metal's opener? "Get up! Get up! Get up! Get Up!" He doesn't, so...
XFL Commercial. Why couldn't he get up? I think I want it the XFL to fail only to so I don't have to hear about it again.
WWF Rewind, presented by Presto, from two weeks ago: Chyna almost breaking Ivory's neck with a big swing, and Ivory returning the favor.
Essa Rios vs Shank (already in the ring) - You may see Shank on NWA Wildside. I'd rather see one of Suicidal Tendencies here if I got to choose, but I do not. They're talking about Chyna. Todd is God, apparently. Lockup, Shank throws him down. Lockup, pushes into the corner, right, right, right, corner whip, kip up by Essa Rios, flip for no reason, arm drag, arm drag, dropkick. Shank rolls out. Essa waits for him to get to the corner, , here's the somersault tope onto Shank. Shank thrown in. Cover, 2 count. You know, if you really wanted to get that move over, have him win by count out. Kick to the gut, right, double chop, double chop, punch misses, Shank with something in the Rock Bottom family. Rights to the head. Shank talks to the crowd. Now they're talking about Kai En Tai. Whip, clothesline by Essa. Right. Whip, kick by Essa, Corner whip, reversed, Essa gets a foot up, jumping at him with a Thesz press, is Shank gonna fall over? Yes. Punches. Picking him up, whip, no reversed right into a tilt-a-whirl, no, Shank's gonna Tombstone him? No, that's like a Michinoku Driver. Shank to the top. Shank slowly to the top. Essa jumps to the top, top rope, super armdrag! Fireman's carry, dropped down in front. Moonsault! (3:59) Hey, that wasn't so bad. Here's a replay.
WWF "Don't try this at home" ad.
Sunday Night Heat will feature a special tribute to Mick Foley, Dean Malenko is looking for Lita and Christmas presents for all. On Raw, Steve Austin vs Kane, an update on Chyna's condition and the first entries into the Royal Rumble.
Hey, if that 208 up there is episode number (and it probably is), does that makes this the end of the fourth season of Jakked/Shotgun Saturday Night? I think so. Wow. Comeback for year 5 - next week.The Cubs Fan
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