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WWF Jakked by The Cubs Fan




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you think you know Christian (w/Let's go back to Smackdown) vs Grandmaster Sexay (w/WWF Music Volume 5 Ad) - Christian did lay out Buh Buh Dudley - and that's all we see about that. Your announcers are Jonathon Coachman and Michael Hayes - always funny to listen them pretend this is life after you've seen the XFL game. You know, I liked Christian's music on Volume 4 - but I might have been the only one who did. Christian is not amused by Sexay's dancing - or Sexay throwing his chains at him. 3 Lockup, armbar by Christian, reversed, headlock, off the ropes, shoulderblock. Dancing, off the ropes, duck the clothesline, slide under, back suplex, Christian lands on his feet, of the ropes, cross body but Sexay ducks down. Sexay gets down. Christian on the apron, right blocked, Sexay right now and slingshotting Christian in. Inverted atomic drop, and Sexay mocks him. Corner whip, reversed, charge in meets big boot. Sexay goes up top - dancing missile dropkick for 2. Eye rake by Christian, and Christian throws him shoulder first into the corner post. Right, right, right, shot to the back, Whip, kick to the stomach, Russian legsweep. "Christian Sucks." Cover for 2. Christian is mad and kick the bottom rope. Putting Sexay on the top rope - Sexay fights back , and Christian falls off. Now he tries to punch Sexay from the mat and it misses - 2nd rope bulldog. Both up slow. Christian right misses, Sexay's right doesn't. Here's another another. Whip, clothesline missed, kick is caught, enzuiguri is not. Ten Punch count along stops at 3 as Christian pushes him down - and puts his feet on the 2nd ropes for the leverage on the cover. That's 3. (3:23) Sexay complains but should he really be complaining right now? Ha ha I'm so inside it is incredibly annoying.

A look back at the history between Trish and Steph, Test is in the house - but next, Rock and Austin have a date with destiny. Or something like that.

Let's go back to last Sunday, where the Rock won the WWF Title back from Kurt Angle. Fast forward to last Monday, where the Rock and Steve Austin had a few things to say to each other. Kurt was bitter about all of this - which led to a triple threat match. We don't see the finish of that, but more of the triple team on the Rock after. Austin makes the save, and Rock thought about dropping him. Angle wasn't done - he got involved on Smackdown during the Rock's match with Steve Regal. Rock repaid the favor (but which?) by showing up for the the Austin/Angle match. (12:39)

Still to come - Kane and Undertaker had problems to solve from No Way Out, Trish and Vince did too, but next, Test beats somebody.

You know, I wasn't paying attention enough to know if I wasn't hearing Jerry Lawler when I should - maybe next video package.

This week's classic WWF WM moment: Andre winning the body slam challenge at WM2

This is a European Champion vs Al Fleming (already in the ring) - Fleming is ripping off the Caged Heat look. Lockup, Test pushes Fleming in the corner, right, right, kick, kick, kick, kick, kick, kick. Corner whip, clothesline. Corner whip, Al gets an elbow up this time. But then he charges out - right into a full nelson release slam. Right, whip, Fleming grabs the ropes and slides out. Test pulls him back to the apron - and gets a jawbreaker. Right, right, whip, reversed into a short arm clothesline. Corner whip, charge comes up empty - Al comes off the top rope with a cross body, but he's caught and slammed. Whip, clothesline misses, right by Al, right by Al, off the ropes, big boot from Test. Meltdown. Night. (2:24) Are the matches shorter because the video packages are longer or are the video packages longer because the matches are shorter?

Still to come, Essa Rios is here - but next, the Trish/Steph/Vince fun.

Here's our video package - Vince asks Linda for a divorce. Vince rips Linda. Shane calls and says that Linda is being taken to the hospital. Vince is happy. Steph announces that Vince is now CEO and everyone (but Foley) is happy. Many scenes hinting that Trish and Vince are getting it on, which annoys Steph. Vince says they're just friends. Steph doesn't believe him. Trish and Steph fight a lot. Then they have a match. Stop showing that clip of Steph kissing Vince on the lips, please. Regal's told to get involved. Regal's not quite sure how to get involved. Trish slaps him, Regal drops her, Steph wins, Vince is unhappy. There's a tag match. Vince says he's not gonna back off on her daughter, should they meet in the ring. And what do you know - they do. Vince talks during the match. Then he pulls Trish in for the three way beatdown. Sewage. Talking. Vince is gonna have a hard time getting a new toy now. (5:57), but it felt as long as the first package. So, what, does Trish go back o to the hospital and free Linda now?

Still to come - Essa is in the house - but next, wassssssup. 

WWF Lugz Beatdown of the week features Kane and Undertaker versus everyone else.

We go back to last Thursday's six man tag, mostly so we can see Kane do the wassssssup again. (3:08) Yes, longer then the Test match.

Essa Rios (pull of red - then black and blue no destiny) vs Samoa Joe (already in the ring) - Wasn't Samoa Joe one of those guys who were SURE to join Rikishi and Haku in a growing Samoan family? Essa flicks water at Joe before the match. Lockup, arm back by Joe, Essa with a right, right, crank and a chop, Snap mare by Joe but Essa land on his feet, whip, reversed, Joe tries a hiptoss but it gets blocked, Essa holds them there for a couple knees to the gut, then goes for the rana but is pushes off, Essa still lands on his feet, hesitation, then Joe runs into a powerslam for 2. Tickets for Backlash in Chicago (well, Rosemont) go on sale MARCH 17th - since I forget to bug the right people to try to get a WrestleLine gig and free tickets to the show, I guess I'll have to actually wake up that morning and pay for tickets. Isn't it sad when a plan doesn't come together? Right, right, double chop, double chop.  Essa back off, and Joe pulls him down in the other corner turnbuckle. Essa out of corner, into an over head belly to belly. Kick to the back, kick to the back, pick up and a snap suplex. Running stomp. Essa hooks his legs around the ropes to get a break, but then gets a right, chop, whip, reversed but Essa hits the flying headscissors. Dropkick.  Joe rolls out - Essa waits - over the corner somersault plancha. Joe is DEAD. Essa yells in Spanish. Throwing him back in - jumping legdrop gets 2.  Right, by Joe - powerbomb - reversed into a high swinging DDT by Essa. Essa with a stomp, and says it is over - moonsault looks GREAT and connects. (3:11)

K-Kwik guest hosts Heat. He shall get rowdy. THREE titles on the line: Chris Jericho puts the IC on the line again Perry Saturn, Raven continues his quest to get non-Hardcore gold by going after the European Title and Test and another title match that's apparently not worth mentioning. See ya next week.

The Cubs Fan
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