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WWF Jakked by The Cubs Fan




attitude open - the shots of Austin celebrating with beer at the end have been replaced with angry Austin scowls, wonder what took them so long.

Hardcore Holly vs Ray Steele (already in the ring, gets no graphic, still with the weird tatoos) - your announcers are Michael Hayes, Jonathon Coachman and Backlash Hype. Say two man power trip with me. Weird to see the same jobber two weeks in a row. Lockup, headlock by Holly, off the ropes, shoulderblock. Off the ropes, over, armdrag by Steele, but Holly kicks him away. Steel's clothesline is ducked and Holly gets the armdrag and another, into an armbar. Kai En Tai are on a winning streak. Hammerlock by Bob, reversed via fireman's carry into an armbar, up to their feet, into the corner, Holly lets loose with a right. Corner whip, reverse, Steele comes off the side ropes and right into a powerslam for one two. Turnbuckle shot. Kick. Corner whip,  Holly doesn't follow in, whip again, Steele comes out with a weak looking clothesline. Whip. Clothesline is ducked and Steel hits a reverse neckbreaker. Cover one two kickout. Turnbuckle shot. Chop. Chop. Chop. And he's just pissing Hardcore off - slap, slap, slap, corner whip, charge in but Steele gets a boot up, up to the second rope and he hits a flying neckbreaker (Blockbuster except no flip) on Holly Slow to cover one two kickout. Slam, and he says that's it. Then he stops to hear the boos. Steele goes up. He takes a while to steady himself - then misses the frog splash. Clothesline misses but Holly's doesn't. And another. Whip, backdrop. Whip, best dropkick in the business. Cover one two. He probably shouldn't have celebrated a dropkick. Holly hangs Steele over the top rope and hits the super low blow, ref too busy getting Steele off the ropes to notice. Whip, , Steel goes behind, knee and going for a powerbomb but Holly just takes out his legs and gets the jackknife cover, one, two, Steele tries from the bridge but doesn't really get it, so he just picks Hardcore up and goes for the powerbomb again. This time, Holly picks him up over his back and slingshots him hard to the ground, cover, one two three (4:04) Did someone get a new finisher when I wasn't looking?

Will Sunday be the last of Shane-O-Mac? How will Billy Gunn fare in his match tonight? And next, who will go home with a little less gold Sunday?

Backlash is mere hours away - here's how we got to the main event. I like how the selling point of the show is a title change when they do that almost every week anyway. (3:18)

Still to come, the big man Haku, the big man Big Show, but next, the big One Billy Gunn.

Billy Gunn (w/WWF the Music Volume 5) vs Jet Michaels (already in the ring and no graphic) - Billy Gunn's music is the Coach's favorite song. The Coach is a WHORE. Lockup no waistlock by Jet, reversal by Gunn into a headlock, Jet with punches, off the ropes,, Gunn with a shoulderblock. Off thee ropes, over, hiptoss reversed by Gunn. Stomp. Off the ropes elbow drop comes up empty. Right rights chop, whip, reversed, clothesline missed, head down too soon, Jet hits a kick and a dropkick, cover one. Gunn with a kick, right, corner whip, jumping reverse neckbreaker on the rebound. Billy runs around the ring for no real reason. Whip, tilt-a-whirl slam. Calling for it - the One and Only connects. Cover one two three. (1:47) Wow, way to let the other guy get in nothing. It is better than two chinlocks in a four minute match, I'll give him that.

The good thing about this is that it gives us time to see that Undertaker/Kane/Marilyn Manson piece one more time, though actually I don't think that's a good thing. I wonder if the WWF could get Manson to do a cover of "With My Baby Tonight"?

Still to come, Essa Rios stops by, Angle, Benoit, Regal and Jericho are a quarrelsome foursome, but next, what chance does Shane have at Backlash?

Shane/Big Show video package. That "I now own WCW" scene is still really freaky. (2:31)

Haku vs Derek Selsvold (already in the ring but) - Graphic! Wow. Lockup, waistlock by Haku, reversed by Derek, Haku elbows out, Derek with punches by they don't matter, back suplex by Haku. Stomp. Stomp. Right. Right by Derek, Haku seems amused, whip, reversed, sunset flip by Derek, Haku with a Mongolian chop to break it up. Push in the corner, chop.  Derek with a kick, no sale, palm shot is your return. Haku pushes him in the corner, chop. Kick. Corner whip, follow in splash. Pummeling. Tongan Dance and headbutt. Whip, back elbow. Kick. Whip, clothesline misses, Derek with a shoulderblock. He celebrates - and gets the Tongan Death Grip. One two three (2:05) Haku will be buying dinner tonight, a whole 18 seconds slower! Maybe they cut two minutes from these matches so Essa can go eight. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. 

A look back at the first year of XFL. But next, a look at the Ultimate Submission and Duchess of Queensbury matches. 

Castrol Regal Tap Out To The Crossface of RAW

Which lead to this rematch on Smackdown. (6:07) A long replay of a match is better than a long replay of a interview. You ever notice that the pendulum blade has spikes on it when they're doing the graphics for the matches, but doesn't when they're just showing the PPV graphic alone? Oh, you don't care.

Essa Rios (tiger pulls offs, white tights) vs Dereck Stone (already in the ring and graphic!) - Coach: "I can hardly sit in my seat - I can't wait for Chi-Town tomorrow night!" Hayes: "Well, shut up." Sometimes the blunt ways are the best ways. Essa takes his time tearing away those tear away pants. Lockup, Essa knee, right, right, right, right, hard high kick, hard high kick. Too Cheese is hosting Backlash at WWFNY. Whip, hiptoss, reversed, Essa gets the knee but the rana is pushed off, Essa backflips to land on his feet and lands an armdrag, and another. Push in the ropes, knee, whip, dropkick but Essa grabs the ropes. Essa runs over him, grabbing Stone's legs to roll him to his feet, then dropkicks him in the back, knocking him out of the ring. Essa aims runs and there's the somersault plancha to the floor over the corner. Throwing Stone in, cover one two kickout. Replay. Whip, reversed into a knee, shot to the back, slam. Slam, Essa falls behind, reverse rollup for two. Off the ropes, under, clothesline is ducked and Stone hits a back suplex. Forearm, corner whip, Essa flips to the apron, blocks the punch, turnbuckle smash, flip to the top rope but he's crotched. Stone joins him up there - super back suplex? No, it's blocked and Essa elbows him to the mat. Is he gonna hit the moonsault already? Yes, right into the moonsault and that's it. (2:41) What's going on today?

XFL Season in Review (2:45) Hey, that IS longer than the last match.

We must have time to kill this week (I wonder why?) so here's the Austin/Triple H version of the Fight Song. (1:04)

Sunday Night Heat will have all the latest details on Backlash - here's a few last plugs. That's it. See you at Backlash - hey, try to see me at Backlash.

The Cubs Fan
[slash] wrestling

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