You are here

WWF Jakked by The Cubs Fan

22.9.1

Main

BLAH

Two Years Ago - Marc Taylor saw Edge squash Mideon and Shawn Stasiak upset Prince Albert when Droz's interference. Also, an extra special match courtesy of Smackdown (something that they cut out of the show) had a super fast eight man tag, Edge, Christian and the Acoyltes defeating the New Brood and the Dudley Boyz.

One Year Ago - Jakked featured Lo Down looking for respect and getting a win over the new team of Dean and Crash, the quarter annual Jakked meeting between Essa and TAKA and Perry Saturn and Just Joe winning squashes over semi-notable indy guys. Also, it was my first one for [slash] - this marks my one year anniversary on my road to insanity.

TV 14 DLV Open

Hugh Morrus & Mike Awesome vs APA - the Alliance team comes out to Awesome's music, so I guess we know where Hugh's spot on the depth chart. With all these weird tag combinations, I really could make a chart by now. Your hosts are Chris Leary and Jonathon Coachman but we don't have to see them. They send out their well-wishes to those affected by the recent tragedies, and talk about getting back to work. The American Flag is not on the mini-screen anymore. Coach and Leary push Angle's match and book. Leary's a fast reader. Awesome and Faarooq will start. APA chant, only stopped when Bradshaw acknowledges the crowd. Hugh wants in for the sneak attack but he's cut off by the ref. Circle, and Hugh looks to be trying again but stopped. Awesome with clubbing forearms. Body slam (Coach: "powerslam" - how do you mess that up?) Fists to the head. Legdrop, no cover. Kick, punches, off the ropes and right into the powerslam. No cover, because Faarooq rather stomp. Tag to Bradshaw, hold so Bradshaw can punch and chop away. Double whip, double spinebuster's seen better days. Shot for Hugh for just being there. Turnbuckle shot, knee, forearm, forearm, forearm, back suplex. Bradshaw's gonna powerbomb him but Hug's in to break it with a forearm. Here's some more. Mike Sparks won't let Faarooq in, hmm. Hugh makes the clapping sound - that's always cool and all but I never understand how it actually helps. Maybe it's just to tick off Faarooq. Eye rake. Corner whip, charge in, avalanche. Clothesline and Bradshaw is down, cover one two shoulder up. Vertical suplex. Off the ropes, running elbow drop. Whip, head down too soon so Bradshaw forearms it and hits a DDT. Crawl for a tag? No, cover one two kickout. Now a tag to Faarooq, hold him for a right, right, right, right knocks him down. Cover one two kickout. Announcers speculating if Booker T needs Shane to be on the same level as the Rock. Faarooq chooses poorly and tries to go off the ropes right in front of Awesome - he gets a forearm and stumbled into a clothesline. Tag to Awesome and he's up as quick as a cat - flying clothesline, casual cover one two kickout. Rights, and a whip, clothesline. Awesome drags Faarooq to his corner and leaves him there to annoy Bradshaw, which allows Hugh to get a choke in. Awesome gets in some boots while Faarooq is hanging there. Tag to Hugh. Slam. Tag to Awesome. Pickup - Alabama Slam. Was Hardcore gone for one day before Awesome decided to borrow his move? That's bad mojo. Going to the top rope - top rope splash hits, cover one two that's a bigger kickout than one would normally expect from such a move. Right (not even close), off the ropes, right into the spinebuster. Does Faarooq have enough to get to his corner? Bradshaw gets the crowd to clap. Tag to Hugh, tag to Bradshaw. Big boot for Hugh, whip, back elbow. Big boot for Awesome. Corner whip, reversed, cross body by Hugh by Bradshaw catches him and walks into position - blockbuster suplex. Cover one two broke up by Awesome. Faarooq throws Awesome out and joins him out there. Corner whip by Hugh, charge misses, Clothesline from Hell, Coach has a stroke, one two three. (6:06) That was a quick six.

Still to come, a recap of the WCW Title Match, and Albert takes on Kanyon. But next, did Stone Cold go to far?

Austin/Angle graphic. Austin/Angle video package. I'm sick. (3:21)

Coming up, Chuck Palumbo versus Billy Gunn, Steve Austin on Tough Enough, but next, a look back at Edge and Christian.

M&Ms Edge return of Last Monday

Edge/Kanyon from Smackdown. (2:47) Edge is (once again) angry and animalistic, but still the same ol' goofy guy in his match graphic.

Who Better Than Kanyon vs Albert - I probably should note that they've switch from using the ECW/WCW chryon to everyone using the normal Jakked ones with ECW/WCW logos added (for everyone - no separate groups.) Kanyon doesn't seem to be looking forward to this match. They're doing an awful lot of wondering about how Edge and Christian's family are going to be tomorrow. Lockup, headlock by Kanyon and he's very proud of himself. Albert tries to lift Kanyon up and off of him, but when Kanyon won't let go, he settles for the push in the ropes, charging shoulderblock strategy. Kanyon off the ropes, under a clothesline, right into a press slam. Coach wonders if E and C will be around the same family dinner table at Thanksgiving in a couple months. Scissors kick. Albert moves Kanyon into position - he's going up? X symbol. Second rope Vader splash misses. Elbow drop by Kanyon. Elbow drop. Elbow drop. Coach continues his roll by talking about how much better Edge's new music is and how much worse Christian's (new, though he probably means the old Edge theme and not the Christian one) music is. Kanyon with a slingshot elbow drop, one two kickout. Push in the corner, kick, kick, right, right, right (hand hurts) Albert misses a clothesline and Kanyon goes into the classic "sleeper on a big guy." Albert turns it into a side slam. Right is blocked, but Albert's is not. Right. Whip, clothesline is ducked, jumping shoulderblock by Albert, cover one two kickout. Corner whip, Albert splash. Coach strangely talks around (but alludes to the fact) that the live Tough Enough finale will be their first show back in WWFNY since the tragedies. Double choke is ducked under, kicked is blocked and Kanyon is spun around - Baldo Bomb. It's like WM XIV all over again. One two three. (2:49)

Still to come, Crash vs Justin Credible. But next, the WCW Title recap.

WCW Title Graphic and video package. (2:25) Also, a WWF Title match. 

Coming up, the One. Next, Tough Enough is down to it's final week. (2:28) Who's gonna win? Watch on Thursday. Coach hosts. 

Chuck Palumbo vs the One Billy Gunn - Coach bets Leary $25 that he can't name the last five people left on Tough Enough. "Nidia, Chris, Jason, Maven, and um....Justin?" Debate whether it's worse that people in the WWF so openly show their ignorance about WWF TV, or that that Leary doesn't know despite them just having shown the weekly Tough Enough clip. When he remembers Taylor, Leary says Taylor is nice. Lockup, no one's winning. Palumbo with a headlock, forearms by Gunn, push into the rope sand Palumbo comes back with a forearm, off the ropes, hiptoss blocked by Gunn so Palumbo just clotheslines him. He's smarter than he looks. Stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp. Right. Shoulder. Shoulder. Forearm. Forearm. Face push, face push. Chuck's got to learn about doing that - as usual, Gunn comes back with rights a plenty, exchanging places with Palumbo in the corner. Leary starts to talk about how Palumbo and Gunn must have to live in the gym to get those bodies. Here are some kicks. Corner whip, no reversed into the overhead belly to belly suplex. Chuck flicks his sweat at Gunn and then covers one two kickout. Surfboard. Gunn's trying to stand up and turning around. Gunn with a kick, right, right, Palumbo awkwardly picking him up, running powerslam is stopped by Gunn sliding down his back and pushing Palumbo into the corner. Palumbo charges out, clothesline is blocked and Gunn hits the reverse neckbreaker. Both men are down. Jim Korderas lays in the double count. Both up, punch is blocked, Gunn's is not. More. And then a whip, back elbow. Off the ropes, big clothesline. One two kickout. Russian legsweep. Gunn is calling for the Fameasser but then oddly feels faint all of the sudden - Palumbo rolls him up in a small package one two kickout. That was weird. Gunn still acting (?) out of it, and Palumbo lays in a big punch. Jim checks on him, then starts the ten count as Palumbo gets set. Jungle Kick, but it's caught by Gunn, he's spun around, kick to the midsection, Fameasser. One Two Three. (3:25) That finish is less impressive when it's used in two straight matches. Palumbo is dead on the mat, it should be noted.

Lugz double suplex on Big Show of Last Thursday.

Crash vs Justin Credible (w/Unforgiven T-Shirt) - Crash has a new pre-match pose, then talks to ref Charles Robinson. Circle. Lockup, armdrag by Crash. Coach playing Hayes and Leary playing Coach is a lot less fun than Hayes playing Hayes and Coach playing Coach. Lockup, waistlock by Crash, takedown into a headlock, then to a front facelock, then Justin gets to the ropes. Crash takes his time to break. Circle. Kick to the stomach, right. Right. Whip, clothesline misses, Holly's flying headscissors does not. Holly dropkick connects. Slam. Crash going to the top - flying punch connects, cover one two kickout. Clothesline misses, SUPERKICK. Justin doesn't cover so I guess that's not his finisher this week. Turnbuckle shot, kick down in the corner, pulling powerbomb one two kickout. Turnbuckle smash, right, right, right, kick. Announcers are wondering if the Tarantula is foreplay for Tajiri and Torrie. Justin loads up the boot - sliding dropkick misses and he gets crotched on the post. Crash waits for him, punch, blocked, Crash's isn't'. Repeat. Here's some more. Whip, powerslam. One two kickout. Kicks in the corner, now mounted punches. Robinson wants to get him off but Crash ends it with a big elbow. Corner whip, reversed, Justin charges into a boot, Crash going to the rope - Crash with a cross body, Justin (not smoothly) rolls it over and pulls the tights one two three (3:21) I guess that's what happens when two guys without finishers meet. Justin averts the clean sweep for the Alliance, but they still go down 3-1. Crash can't believe it. No one points a finger at Robinson, but as Coach is talking about the depths the Alliance will sink, Crash attacks Justin. Rights in the corner, corner whip, Justin Flip to the apron (almost forget to get that in) and clotheslined to the floor. Coach is talking about how it's okay for Crash to be a sore loser, whatever. Your Winner, JUSTIN CREDIBLE.

Heat is LIVE from the site of Unforgiven. At Unforgiven, Edge vs Christian (for the IC Title), Booker T and Shane vs the Rock and Stone Cold vs Kurt Angle. It's tomorrow night. Night.

The Cubs Fan
[slash] wrestling

Email the Author
Visit thecubsfan.com

Comment about this article on the EZBoard

BLAH

Main

Design copyright © 1999-2001 Christopher Robin Zimmerman & KZiM Communications
Guest column text copyright © 2001 by the individual author and used with permission