From: kzim@watserv.ucr.edu (Christopher Robin Zimmerman)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.pro-wrestling
Subject: WWF Prime Time Wrestling - 30/11/92
Keywords: Why drink chocolate milk?
Message-ID: <24138@galaxy.ucr.edu>
Date: 2 Dec 92 00:19:26 GMT
Sender: news@galaxy.ucr.edu
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Nntp-Posting-Host: watnxt11.ucr.edu

First of all, I'd like to alleviate your curiosity:  it was I who gave Tito  
Santana that third place vote for "Best Technical Wrestler."  Why, you ask?   
Why, because he put Ric Flair in a figure four at the SummerSlam Spectacular.   
If THAT ain't worth a third place vote, well, I don't know what is.

WWF Prime Time Wrestling, as shown on the USA Network 30.11.92

As expected, the departure of Mr. Perfect from heeldom trims the "Panel of  
Experts" to three, with the face chair now being occupied by (also expected)  
a non-wrestling Macho Man Randy Savage.  Vince McMahon rounds out the trio.

Vince gushes over Savage, Savage gloats, Heenan blows up and promises Perfect  
will be "out of the picture."

Tatanka v Papa Shango (Commentators Gorilla Monsoon, Lord Alfred Hayes)  Of  
course, Chaviss doesn't have his feathers.  Shango quickly works on a posing  
Tatanka but misses a move, and suddenly it's all Tatanka until HE misses a  
move.  Shango with punches and head butt (flooring Tatanka) and stomp.   
Although Tatanka is a proponent of ICOPRO, you couldn't tell by all the  
stomping on his prone form.  Choke on the top rope, more punching, and a  
nerve pinch (Golly!  That looks like it smarts!)  But of course, the Native  
American rises to his feet.  Shango presses harder so Tatanka can go down  
again only to rise again.  Two elbows and a chop and down goes Shango.  He  
gets up and this time it takes two dropkicks, two chops and a leap to get him  
down.  2.  Tatanka goes into his skip dance and chops two more times (one  
chop offense?) and chops off the top rope for an encore.  Of course, it's  
only 2 because we haven't seen that cool fireman's carry, right?  Right.   
Shango is clotheslined out of the ring, where he grabs the voodoo stick.   
Sparks fly (see Shango/Crush, 26 October), but luckily referee "Blind" Tim  
White notices, and Tatanka remains undefeated with a DQ.  Geez, they didn't  
even wait a month to repeat the same trick ending.  Arrrrrrgh.....

Money, Incorporated v Gary Jackson and George Anderson (Monsoon, Hayes)  
"Irwin...Irwin..."

Special Report with Lord Alfred Hayes, sponsored by SuperWrestleMania,  
available for the first time on Sega!  Ramon and Flair "post match" surprise  
news conference.  Yeah, they're unhappy, but at least they have that limo,  
eh?

Vince has fun with the previous interview.  Savage says Perfect can handle  
the situation.  Heenan wants to know how Savage can respect a man who stabbed  
three guys in the back.  Perfect "is in the biggest trouble in his life."

Lance Cassidy v The Brooklyn Brawler (Monsoon, Hayes)  Well, at least we get  
to hear some classic Monsoon medicine talk.  Monsoon goes on to mention that  
he's heard Cassidy knows how to twang a guitar. (Slam Jam?)  Inset interview  
has Cassidy sounding like a Big Spring disc jockey.  Clothesline off top rope  
to win.  Cassidy does Tim Harris-style gun motions with hand.

Call 1 800 634 6698 for *your* WM9 tix info.  It's in Vegas!  Viva!

Terrific Terry Taylor v Joey "WCW" Maggs (Monsoon, Hayes)  Monsoon praises  
guys like Maggs who "dedicate their lives exclusively to the WWF..."  Hrm.   
Taylor has a real nice jacket.  Head picture of himself with "TTT" underneath  
on the front, and a dictionary definition of "terrific" on the back.  It's  
white.  I want one for Christmas (Really!).  Monsoon calls him "Terrible"  
Terry.  Lots of punishment for Maggs.  Slaughter and Tunney are mentioned  
(Don't they know the Slaughter angle is dead?).  Taylor taunts crowd and ref,  
and wins with the slightly modified powerbomb.  And I thought he could only  
beat guys named Jim, I guess it's guys whose first names start with J.   
(Taylor 3-0-2 on PrimeTime)

Reverend Slick gives it to ya.  I imagine he writes his own sermons, too.  I  
guess he really is going to manage again.  GREAT.

Bob Backlund v Tom Stone (Vince McMahon, Bobby the Brain Heenan)  Listen to  
that crowd cheer, whoa.  Dull inset interview.  Stone looks generally pissed  
the entire match, especially during the handshakes before and after the  
squash.

Believe it or not, Savage likes Backlund.  Heenan asks Slick to say a little  
prayer for Perfect.

Sean Mooney, in the Event Center, introduces a canned Rick Martel interview.   
Sailor suit, pipe, and yes, no feathers.  He's coming after Bret Hart, yeah,  
him and everyone else.  Mooney congratulates Savage and in return Heenan says  
Mooney "wouldn't want the new Mrs. Mooney to get hurt, would you?"

Hacksaw Jim Duggan v Tom Becker (Monsoon, Hayes)  Kicked out of the studio,  
Duggan is forced to make a living by (ahem) wrestling.  Lord, this man his  
charisma though.  Monsoon's wish list of opponents for Duggan includes  
Shango, Demento, and Ramon.  Duggan wins with the bull run and, although  
having a little trouble pinning, manages.  2x4 toss.  HO!

Bam Bam Bigelow v Jerry Fox (McMahon, Perfect)  While McMahon acts like  
Bigelow is new to the WWF, Bigelow's inset interview clearly states "I'm  
back!"  Bam Bam wins with a head in the gut, off the top.

Promos:  ICOPRO (Bret Hart), WWF Figures, Electronic Talking Battleship  
("Yeah!")

Out comes Jamison with the "Loser's Lunch" for Heenan.  Heenan threatens some  
bodily harm, and Jamison (chicken) runs behind Savage.  McMahon hurredly  
calls the next match "Sean Mooney vs. Virgil..."

Shawn Michaels v Virgil (Monsoon, Hayes)  Michaels is announced as "new  
interconinental champion" for the benefit of the crowd.  How come Virgil gets  
all these title shots if he keeps getting creamed at the PPVs?  Come to think  
of it, when WAS Virgil's last win?  Hold on...ah, it was 3 weeks ago against  
Jim Peterson.  Well, OK.  Hayes is pining for Sherri.  Virgil is wearing his  
new b&w pants.  Michaels has some fun with Virgil's hair.  As expected,  
Monsoon raves on about the Hart/Michaels match at SS.  Seesaw of momentum.   
Monsoon's dream list of IC contenders includes the Undertaker, Yokozuna, and  
Crush, none of which I'd consider IC contenders.  Although you can't hear it  
on the tape, the crowd seems to be into Michaels.  "Virg" gets up from the  
reverse chin lock, horrible backslide (not sure who messed it up), but  
Michaels gets a "tremendous" shot to keep up the pounding.  Virgil gets his  
resurgence, knocking the gum out of Shawn's mouth (incorrectly identified as  
a tooth).  Virgil does a nice double-fakeout proving he has half a brain, but  
promptly runs into the corner, losing half a brain.  Side suplex (U.S. Patent  
4,621,897.2) and pin for Michaels.

Rrazor Rramon v Gary Jackson (McMahon, Heenan)  McMahon thinks that  
Ramon/Perfect would definitely be a great matchup.  Gary Jackson is 0-2  
tonight after this match.  McMahon is still talking about Ramon/Perfect, so  
you can guess an upcoming main event near you.  I suppose if Jackson could  
have afforded pay-per-view, he would've known there exists a Perfect counter  
to the Razor's Edge.

Heenan tells Savage that THAT is machismo.  The plan is Flair gets the belt  
and Ramon gets to take Perfect apart.  Pick yer fueds, ladies and gentlemen.

Let us take you back...waaay back...all the way back to January and the  
Rockers split.  Crash.  Listen for Michaels trademark phrase: ("Is there a  
problem?  I don't think so!") which he used all of two weeks.  Marks: "Hey,  
whatever happened to the Barber?"

Let us take you back to the mirror fracas.  Crash.

Mean Gene Okerlund interviews Marty Jannetty.  Jannetty correctly states that  
he took an "eight month hiatus," and no one notices.  Threats to Michaels.

(Orange) Crush v The Stamina Jobber (Monsoon, Hayes)  Oh, that's a "hang  
loose" sign on the back of the outfit.  Crush shows some interesting (as WWF  
goes) moves, but still has that dumb, dumb finisher.  Spiccoli doesn't last  
as long as he usually does, but does last longer than most of Crush's squash  
opponents.

Hey look, Caesar's Palace!  I guess Las Vegas really IS the new capital of  
family entertainment!

The Headshrinkers v Dan Robbins, John Larz and Gary Jackson (Sean Mooney,  
Hayes)  Just kidding about Jackson.  Hayes has the best line I've ever heard  
him use ever, EVER.  On dealing with telling those Samoans apart:  "Well,  
that makes sense.  Samu is the fat one, and the other is Fatu!"  I'm still  
ROTFL.  Hayes will get my second place vote for best color now.  While Samu  
picks his nose, we get that Clown shot which will alleviate any withdrawal  
you may have been suffering.  The Clown, by the way, has been following the  
WWF for two months now.  The Headshrinker matches are starting to fall into  
formula, although the submission ending is different.

From "The WWF's Hottest Matches," Savage v IRS (Mooney, Hayes)  Knowing they  
wouldn't DARE divulge the ending, I chose not to watch.  Bet on Savage  
keeping the belt, though.

Yokozuna v Mitch Bishop (Monsoon, Hayes)  Yokozuna gained 19 pounds since the  
last weight I heard.  Fuji is in his tux, so this match was before SS.   
"Banzai splash"?  All right.

Heenan wonders if Yokozuna might like some free property in Beverly Hills, if  
only he'd do him a favor...  Vince, ever the goader, takes this to mean that  
Bobby has no faith in Ramon.

Mooney gives us an Undertaker interview.  If you watched KRBK, Sacramento's  
Ch. 31 over the weekend, you'd already have figured out that there's going to  
be a Nailz/UT match at Royal Rumble.  This interview cements it in my mind.   
Why yes, I *do* have my ticket to Arco.  Thanks for asking.  No, I won't be  
taking notes there.

High Energy v W.T. Jones and The Greatest Wrestler Alive, Barry Horowitz  
(Monsoon, Hayes)  Ware brings out Frankie.  Horowitz manhandles Owen Hart but  
tags out to Jones.  Hart tags.  When was the last time you saw two black men  
in the WWF ring?  Battle royales don't count.  Of course, Jones is pinned;  
Horowitz would've been better not tagging out.  I'm sure he could've taken  
both men and won.

Promos:  GI Joe, Electronic Hot Shot Basketball, WWF Nintendo Cartridges

"Ladies and gentlemen, I've just been informed--Shawn Michaels has left the  
building!"

Heenan promises that Flair will be champ, and as Michaels leaves the  
building, so too will Perfect "leave the human race."

Mentions of Slam Jam: 0.
Mentions of Royal Rumble: 0.
Last time you hear me use the words "Ultimate Madness": Now.

Christopher Zimmerman             =I have my Royal Rumble ticket=
 / kzim@watserv.ucr.edu / kzim@ucrmath.ucr.edu / zimmerma@ucrengr.ucr.edu /