From: kzim@ucrmath.ucr.edu (christopher zimmerman)
Newsgroups: rec.sport.pro-wrestling
Subject: WWF Monday Night Raw - 12/4/93
Message-ID: <28861@galaxy.ucr.edu>
Date: 13 Apr 93 22:03:51 GMT
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Well, today was Opening Day at Jack Murphy Stadium, and as such I didn't
get to the report until 1am.  Hope it makes sense.

WWF Monday Night Raw, shown "live" on the USA Network 12.4.93 from the
Mid-Hudson Centre in Poughkeepsie, New York.

We start off seeing the Beverly Brothers and Money, Limited discussing the
Steiner brothers.  I guess that's why we had the Bev/Steiner matchup last
week.  The Beverlies are seen pocketing cold cash from Ted DiBiase and
giving strategy/advice on how to work the Steiner Brothers in a matchup.

Your hosts are Vince McMahon, the Macho Man Randy Savage, and Rambling Rob
Bartlett, who provide all commentary.

Irwin R. Schyster v. Scott Steiner - As you might expect, both men are 
accompanied to the ring by their respective tag team partners.  This match is
a hype for any upcoming corresponding tag team match.  Twice Schyster gets
caught in a Steiner hold, and twice Schyster heads for the ropes.  Schyster
gains the advantage with some impressive kicks, but Scott reverses into a
powerslam.  DiBiase diverts Steiner's attention so Irwin can roll out of the
ring.  Steiner with headlock, repeated shoulder blocks, Schyster with drop
toehold which Steiner reverses into arm bar.  Scott takes Irwin to the
turnbuckle and down.  2 count.  Resume arm bar.  Schyster gets up and elbows
Steiner.  Repeated elbows and boot to the head of Steiner.  They have a
suplex duel and Scott wins, 2 count.  Irwin rolls out of the ring again and
consults with the Multimillion Dollar Man.  IRS suspiciously plays with his
pocket.  Lockup, into the corner, but as referee "Blind" (I don't
remember...one of the veteran ones) goes between them to break it up,
Scyster pokes the eyes of Steiner.  Schyster throws him out, and by
coincidence Scott lands at the feet of DiBiase.  He clotheslines Scott,
inviting Rick over.  DiBiase removes his outfit and assumes the "ready"
stance and we take an ad break.  When we come back, IRS is taking it to
Scott.  Horrendous piledriver, 2 count.  Chinlock/choke, and the "Irwin"
chant has started up.  Scott starts to come back, but Irwin pulls the hair
and resumes the hold.  Up goes Scott again, and they trade punches.  IRS
with backbreaker.  Irwin poses (inexpicably) and takes half an hour to climb
the ropes, so it's no surprise when he meets up with Scott's boot on the way
down.  Scott gets his resurgence, complete with multiple uses of Irwin's
tie.  DiBiase comes in to break the 3 count, immediately inviting
disqualification.  While Schyster lays like a slug, Rick and Scott do
justice on DiBiase and are all set to hit "that Steiner finisher" when from
nowhere come the Beverly Brothers.  Rick is quickly dealt with and a vicious
triple team on Scott ensues.  As DiBiase holds Scott for the double Beverly
clothesline, Scott somehow manages to duck (which looked more like DiBiase
pushing him down) and Theodore takes the clothesline.  The Beverlies are
overwrought with sorrow, as you might expect and while Scott quietly rolls
away to join his brother off camera.  Schyster and DiBiase both come to, and
rather than let the Beverlies explain what happened, start shouting and
shoving.  The timely intervention of *one* WWF official prevents further
mayhem, but one can only wonder...

Tatanka v. Von Krus - Hmmm, the Nazi against the Indian...I'm going with the
Indian on this one.  Krus does a pretty funny imitation Tatanka dance and
tomahawk chop, and spits in Tatanka's general direction, but that's about
it.  Luckily, halfway through the match Doink appears, squirting water on
the audience, the camera...and then disappears as quickly as he showed up.
I guess the feud will start later.  We learn that the Beverly Brothers want
a match with Money, Limited.  Geez, and they were such good friends only
twenty minutes ago.  Fink:  "The winner of this bout, and still
undefeated..." Eych.  Savage:  "Tatanka's still doin' the thing!"  Double
eych.

Sean Mooney with the WrestleMania IX report.  Hulk Hogan is the new champ.
Two Doinks.  The Undertaker returns from the dead.  Watch it again!  Right
after RAW!  It's an *encore*!

Promos:  ICOPRO (New one, Steiners), Slim Jim (Savage), Odor Eaters foot
powder

Rob Bartlett interviews Luna Vachon.  Lovely haircut, lovely makeup job,
lovely smile, and LOVELY singing voice.  I can see Luna's also been
attending the Damien DeMento school of interviewing.  As you might expect,
she trashes Sherri.  Of course, the announcers already let us in on the fact
that Sherri was here, so out she comes to no one's surprise.  Her makeup
isn't quite as bad as Vachon's, but at least she's showing more cleavage
(this later turned out to be quite an omen).  Trash talkin' from Sherri
which leads to an all out attack.  She takes a couple of moments out from
trouncing Vachon to relieve Bartlett of most of his upper outfit.  After
trying to separate the two cats--er, women--Bartlett disappears in pain.
Sherri with back suplex on the mats.  Vachon removes her belt and uses it on
Sherri.  Sherri grabs the microphone cord and chokes Luna.  Clothes start
flying and the fight moves over the steel barricade into the audience.
Somehow, Sgt. Slaughter ends up with Vachon over his shoulder and he carries
her out of the arena.  We don't see Sherri and I'm wondering if her top
managed to stay on (it was certainly having trouble).

When we come back from an ad break, Savage has given Sherri his hat to put
in front of her (no, her top is still on).  Luna comes running back and they
fight again.  Yeah, call me warped, but this kind of T&A does something for
me.  Sherri manages to undo the back of Luna's bra-like thing, but Slaughter
once again makes an untimely intervention.

Papa Shango v. Scott Taylor.  Incredibly, Shango does nothing while passing
by Sensational Sherri, who is walking away in the opposite direction.  As
for Taylor, he tries, but well, you know...  We hear that there may be a
Money/Bevs match next week on RAW.  McMahon: "Uncut, uncensored, and
undressed!"  Bartlett finally returns, with some "injury" makeup, half a
shirt, and playing the dazed & confused bit.  In all this, Shango wins with
his patented shoulderbreaker, and in a surprise development, no feud is set
up with this match.

The "debut" of Friar Ferguson v. Chris Duffy.  He's a monk.  He comes out to
a Gregorian-like chant.  He sprinkles (holy?) water on the crowd.  He drinks
some himself.  He is listed as 385 pounds.  He's wearing a robe (thank
goodness).  He dances.  He makes the cross symbol.  He wins.  Ladies and
gentelmen, I should retire right now.  I have seen everything.

Don't know if he's a face or heel, but I do know that it's times like this
that I'm *SO* proud that my favourite federation is the WWF, the BEST
federation ever.  Can't wait for a Friar/midgets mixed tag.

Clips of Todd Pettengill and Finkus Maximus doing post-WrestleMania
interviews with WrestleMania spectators.

Promos:  WWF Figures (Bulldog?), Alien Cubed Nintendo cartridge, Odor Eaters
Sneaker Tamers.

Next week:  Interview with Bret Hart, Virgil vs. Razor Ramon, and the
Beverly Brothers vs. Money, Limited in a non-title match (gee, wonder who'll
win).  

Cut to Money, Limited in the dressing room area.  Before they can answer a
question from McMahon, the Beverlies jump them from behind.  Pier 9 brawl,
sayeth Savage.  We fade to black.

Christopher Robin Zimmerman, your man on USA
 / kzim@watserv.ucr.edu / kzim@ucrmath.ucr.edu / zimmerma@ucrengr.ucr.edu /