From: zimmerma@ucrengr.ucr.edu (Christopher Robin Zimmerman) Newsgroups: rec.sport.pro-wrestling Subject: WWF Monday Night RAW - 2/8/93 Message-ID: <34947@galaxy.ucr.edu> Date: 3 Aug 93 05:36:17 GMT Sender: news@galaxy.ucr.edu Organization: University of California, Riverside Lines: 116 Nntp-Posting-Host: ucrengr WWF Monday Night RAW, coming to you from the Castle Recreation Center in Alexandria Bay, New York, shown 2.8.93 (but taped some time in July) on the USA Network. From last week: Doink challenges Savage, while Doink #2 and Doink #3 look on. Savage accepts. Opening Credits. Your hosts are Vince McMahon and Bobby the Brain Heenan who provide most of the commentary. We cut to Savage in the lock room, who promises a "little surprise" of his own. The Steiners v. Dwayne Gill and the Greatest Wrestler Alive, Barry Horowitz - As usual, Gill does a good job of selling the Frankensteiner. I wonder how many matches he's been in with them. (Hint: Gill is one of the masked jobber Executioners, too.) "Who Is Lex Luger?" Part One. Simply dreadful, boring interviews with Luger in a monologue about life with MTV-style editing (no camera angle is used longer than 3 seconds). Absolutely nothing useful here. Besides, until they tie it to the Narcissist angle, I'm not buying anything coming out of his mouth. Adam Bomb v. Tony Roy - Vince says next week we'll have the official contract signing for SummerSlam's main event. Wonder what'll happen there. He also plugs "Marilyn & Bobby: Her Final Affair," a USA Premiere Movie. Heenan thinks it's about himself and Mrs. Quayle. Bomb finishes up with a clothesline from the top, followed by the atom smasher (powerbomb). Next week on RAW - Tatanka vs. Mr. Hughes. "Two fierce gladiators collide..." Hmmm. Doink (The Clown) v. Ad Break - As Doink enters on his unicycle, we take an ad break. Amazing, the Macho Patriot enters to his usual theme and NOT his "WrestleMania: The Album" cut. Savage chums it up with the crowd, and Vince tells us that Savage is dedicating this match to Crush, by some convoluted logic. Savage goes under the ring and comes back, apparently finding no clowns. The matchup FINALLY begins as Savage once again works the crowd. Lockup, Doink misses a punch. "Macho" chant has started up. Vince wonders what the "little surprise" is, which finally ruins it for me: I now just KNOW that there's going to be a midget involved. Doink with some illegal moves. Savage gets angry, and goes outside to steal the Fink's chair. While referee "Blind" Dave Hebner wrests the chair from the Macho Man, Doink blindsides him and gains the advantage. Doink pounds away and puts Savage in a Boston Crab. Using the ropes for leverage, Hebner catches him the second time. Doink puts the knee on the ropes and jumps on it, so we can get that infamous Savage limp (tm). Savage manages to get in one shot before he's pounded some more. Savage gains the momentum back by reversing Doink's attempts. Doink ends up on the outside, and Savage follows. As the Clown slams the Macho head into the STEEL post, we take an ad break. When we come back, Savage is powering out of YASH (yet another submission hold). Vince calls Savage a "future Hall of Famer" (meaning one day he'll die). Doink takes Savage post to post. Belly to belly suplex for 2. Another 2 for the Clown. YASH, abdominal stretch. Savage throws Doink over his shoulder. Doink comes back with YASH. Doink reverses a Savage charge into a powerslam. Finally, Doink goes up to the top to deliver his Cannonball, but cleverly Savage rolls out before the Clown lands on him. Eye rake, and Savage rolls out of the ring. Savage goes UNDER the ring. Finally....oh no, it IS a midget. Tiger Jackson, wearing a face mask and dressed like the Macho Man, comes out. Doink thinks this is hilarious, and I would have to if Vince hadn't COMPLETELY GIVEN IT AWAY to me. Anyway, Doink exits the ring to chase the Macho Midget and gets tripped up when he forgets about Savage. Everybody goes back into the ring and thanks to the Midget's distraction, Savage puts Doink in a small package for the 3 count. Vince: "Doink has been out-Doinked!" I wonder who wrote this one. Get a good play-by-play man and it'd be a hit. I still can't forgive Vince for giving away the ending. I know that most WWF fans are too stupid to see it coming, but GEEZ... Promos: ICOPRO (Luger), GI Joe, Slim Jim (Savage) Mean Gene presents *your* SummerSlam Report, sponsored by Chevy Trucks. It's four weeks away! He's only telling us about four matches! New this week: IC match, Perfect vs. Michaels. By phone, Vince interviews the Multimillion Dollar Man. Ted vents spleen at Razor Ramon for about thirty seconds, then hangs up when Vince takes us to footage. Courtesy Wrestling Challenge (Commentary Jim Ross, Heenan) we see the last bit of the 1-2-3 Kid/DiBiase match. Razor comes out and cheers on the Kid. Why? I dunno. While Vince and Heenan discuss the latest series of events, out comes Jim Cornette. Heenan is utterly amazed, but Vince gets to be the first one to say "Cornette." Vince goes on to identify Cornette as "from Smoky Mountain Wrestling." Heenan goes up to the ring and introduces "the greatest manager in the sport," which you wouldn't expect from the greatest manager in the sport. Cornette has come to the WWF to challenge the Steiners on behalf of his team, the Heavenly Bodies (Tom Prichard and Jimmy del Rey). Heenan: "This is the man that's going to set the World Wrestling Federation on fire!" Cornette joins McMahon and Heenan at the commentators' table. Mr. Perfect v. Barry Hardy - Both Cornette and McMahon plug Smoky Mountain. Cornette has some choice words about Vince's hair which I'm sure will be brought up in the 50 million "Cornette on RAW!!!!!!1!" posts. Perfect, after stripping Hardy, gives him the Perfectplex. Promos: "New" WWF Figures, Jurassic Park action figures, "Spiderman 3" Game Boy cart "USA" video played for the millionth time. By the way, Hacksaw is a father again. Heartfelt congratulations to Duggan. Anyway, you have to give Arista credit for passing on this album, a bold and brave move for any record company. Next week: The aforementioned contract signing, Tatanka vs. Hughes, and an appearance by the Heavenly Bodies. Christopher Robin Zimmerman, that one and only RAW guy / zimmerma@ucrengr.ucr.edu / kzim@watserv.ucr.edu / kzim@ucrmath.ucr.edu/