From: zimmerma@ucrengr.ucr.edu (Christopher Robin Zimmerman) Newsgroups: rec.sport.pro-wrestling Subject: WWF SummerSlam Spectacular - 22/8/93 Message-ID: <35807@galaxy.ucr.edu> Date: 23 Aug 93 22:41:32 GMT Sender: news@galaxy.ucr.edu Organization: University of California, Riverside Lines: 192 Nntp-Posting-Host: ucrengr Here is YOUR SummerSlam Spectacular Report. Shown 22.8.93 (but taped 16.8) from the Mid-Hudson Civic Center in Poughkeepsie, New York on the USA Network. Scenes from February's Duggan/Yokozuna squash. Banzai! Notice that Fuji has hair in that match. Your hosts are Jim Ross and Gorilla Monsoon, who provide all commentary. They are wearing matching ties, signifying that they've signed onto the Luger bandwagon. Yokozuna v. Hacksaw Jim Duggan - The Fink announces this is a non-title match. The Champion comes out first with Master Fuji, but without Jim Cornette. Duggan brings up the USA chant. Inset photo of Jim and new daughter. Duggan was wearing his Luger wristbands, but takes them off and throws them into the crowd. 'Zima turns to throw the zalt, and Duggan jumps him. A series of punches fazes the champion briefly. Duggan goes for the board, but the ref wrests it from his hands. As Duggan turns to argue, 'Zima chops him down. Fuji gets in a shot as well. The Champion keeps the Proud American down with a series of boots, and a choke with the boots. Fuji gets to choke him with the Japanese flags. The commentators feel the Champion may well be over 600 pounds now. Duggan is thrown out. Luckily, when enough fans chant "HO," he comes to. He's back in, and quickly lying on the canvas again. 'Zima drops the leg. Headbutt, bearhug. See ya in five minutes... Duggan punches out of it, but then tries a slam. Bad move, the Champ falls on him for two and we take an ad break. When we come back, Duggan is in ANOTHER bearhug, and the Champ's hair is starting to come undone. Duggan tries to punch his way out, no dice. Headbutt does nothing. Somehow, the arm only falls twice. Duggan resorts to munching on the Champion's face to break the hold. Champ chop. 'Zima has guppy breath. Vicious champ choke. Stomp on the head. Duggan hears the "USA" chant, and gets up. He punches, and the champ staggers, but regains his momentum. On the outside, Fuji commands "Banzai banzai banzai!" The Champ responds, whipping Duggan into the corner. Duggan manages to get out of the corner and avoid the splash. The Champ falls to one knee. BOth men get up and Duggan hulks up with a "HO!" Duggan clotheslines him, nothing. Another clothesline, nope. After getting the crowd's permission, he tries one more clothesline, and he goes down. Duggan gives the thumbs up to the crowd and assumes the three point stance. Unfortunately, he chooses Fuji's corner to do it. After a suitable distraction, the Grand Champion comes to and axehandles Duggan to the canvas. One big butt drop and it's over. 1, 2, 3. Fuji gives some more orders to his man. The Champion tosses the ref and goes up to the second rope again. Showing some signs of intelligence, a cartful of WWF referees get Duggan out of there. Goodbye, Jim, way to go out a loser. Vince McMahon and Jim Cornette meet Fuji and Yokozuna on the other side of the curtain. Vince interviews Cornette. If you try really hard, you can even see Fuji. I forgot to mention this in the house report, but when 'Zima's hair isn't in the bun, he looks REAL Samoan. Cornette has a masterful interview, as always. Yosh! Monsoon sees the Main Event as a "close call." Ross plugs the SummerSlam Hotline. Let us take you back to the setup of the DiBiase/Ramon angle. You know, Ramon is fighting this face turn every step of the way. rRazor rRamon v. Blake Beverly - Well, Ramon is nicer to the ring boy, anyway. He's also wearing his Luger armbands. Don't know why Beverly isn't. Posturing by both men. Blake with some nice slaps. Blake with knife edge, kicks, Ramon reverses and chops away. Ramon whips Blake, who holds on to the rope and exits the ring. Ramon follows. After a chase, Beverly comes back in and catches Ramon off guard. Beverly with facelock. Every time Ramon almost powers out, Blake grabs the hair and resumes the hold. Blake: "He ain't nothing!" Ramon finally powers out, grabbing Beverly's hair instead. Beverly asks for the test of strength, flexing for the crowd first. Monsoon: "The only way he wins that one is if he cheats!" Sure enough, Beverly kicks him before the lockup. Ramon, angered, does some illegal punches, flooring Beverly. Ramon rushes Beverly who ducks and sends the Cuban outside. Beverly removes the turnbuckle protector. Neckbreaker by Beverly, and an Irish whip into the exposed metal. Beverly keeps up on the back with a series of axehandles, and a backbreaker. Whip into powerslam. Geez, Ramon's looking good. 2 count by Beverly, Ramon reverses the lackadaisical cover. Pissed off, Beverly clotheslines him ("That's it!!") Ramon face first into the (covered) turnbuckle (Monsoon: Geez, why didn't he used that exposed one?") Beverly gets clumsly, slapping Ramon around. Ramon reverses and whips Beverly into the exposed buckle. This sets up the Razor's Edge. 1, 2, 3. See ya Blake, way to go out a loser. SummerSlam ad. Shots of the Lex Express. Jerry Lawler is sitting in a pink Cadillac with the Honky Tonk Man (No, wait a minute...) They talk about kings, and impostors, and other stuff. I didn't know Elvis was a heel. Jim Ross interviews Bret Hart, who acts generally pissed. Apprarently, there will be Harts seeded throughout the SummerSlam audience. Promos: ICOPRO (Luger), GI Joe, Slim Jim (Savage) Cowboys & Indian v. Barry Horowitz & Reno Riggins & The Brooklyn Brawler - The good trio is wearing Luger armbands, while the bad trio isn't. How annoying. Hey, if the WWF ever creates a six man title, weird as it sounds, the Great One, the High Roller and the Brawler would be the #1 contenders. They work over Billy the Scotsman for Horowitz does get to use his Global catchphrase ("Bye bye!") and hits a Northern Light Suplex for 2!!! When he tags to the Brawler, he says "Take him, Steve!" Riggins gets a side slam, Lombardi gets a neckbreaker, Horowitz gets that neat move were you put your head under the other guys head and snap his jaw by going to the canvas, Horowitz gets a DeMento knee, Brawler gets to munch on the face, and they even manage to distract referee "Blind" Dave Hebner so they can triple team. Horowitz teaches Riggins how to do the Pat on the Back. Anywho, the match stops being fun when Billy tags Tatanka. The high cross body pinfall is thirty seconds away, Riggins being the unfortunate pin-ee. Just when I was getting interested in this match. Sigh. Geez, if the Scotsmen and Tatanka are this bad at SummerSlam, it'll be a short match. More shots of that damn Lex Express. Mean Gene Okerlund interviews the Undertaker. The lights go out for the Pale Destroyer. We learn nothing. Luckily, just to make it interesting, the Giant Gonzo comes out with Harvey Wippleman and gives a fascinating twelve word interview. Sure enough, we get another one of those exciting, two mile an hour chase scenes, complete with unnecessary Undertaker music. Still more shots of that damn Lex Express. Shawn Michaels v. Bob Backlund for the intercontinental title - The Champ is introduced first. Geez, the Fink's off tonight about that challenger-comes-first bit. Michaels starts with scoop slam, and poses, doing a sweeping pantomime in Backlund's direction. Michael's with a second scoop slam, followed by a rest on the top rope. Backlund looks annoyed. Backlund is wearing Luger armbands, by the way. Backlund gets some tosses and slams, finally. Backslide for 2, and Michaels is quick to exit the ring. All Michaels can manage is a spit in the former Champion's direction. Backlund exits the ring, and the chase is on. Michaels goes back in and cowers in the corner. While Backlund asks the audience if he can punch out the IC Champ, we take an ad break. When we come back, Backlund is doing his best imitation of a punching bag. Michaels with lateral press for 2. Michaels with double axehandle off the top to Backlund's head. Michaels with front facelock. Michaels makes "I'm bored" face. Backlund powers out, depositing Michaels on the top turnbuckle. Slap from Backlund (about time!) Backlund puts three or four more moves together, but only 2. Backlund with half hour atomic drop. Backlund covers, and Diesel gets up to distract referee "Blind" Bill Alphonse while everyone counts: 1, 2, 3, 4, 15, 27...anyway, Michaels pins Backlund with an inside cradle, thanks to an extreme handful of tights. So long Bob, way to go out a loser. Who Is Lex Luger? You know, if they took out all this Lex crap, they could have fit a Doink match on this show. Vince McMahon interviews Ludvig B0rga, who starts out in--what, Finnish? Anyway, he switches to English, and promises that Marty won't be around long. His constant refrain of "More pain!" reminds me of someone... Martyr Jannetty v. Duane Gill - Again, only Jannetty has the Luger armbands on. Jannetty hits a nice head scissors, but this match is basically filler, what with Marty missing half his moves and all. "Radio WWF" is hyped, which sounds suspiciously like Jim Ross' old show. 9-11PM EDT, Saturday. Jannetty finishes off Gill with a somersaulting DDT and the fist off the top. 1, 2, 3. Ross steals "Stick a fork in him, he's done" from Monsoon. Promos: Jurassic Park Action Figures, "Bart's Nightmare" Genesis cart, Bicycle Playing Cards Mean Gene with YOUR SummerSlam Report. Aaron Neville will be singing the National Anthem. "Greatest SummerSlam in WWF history!" Luger/'Zima. Hart/Lawler. Perfect/Michaels for the threepeat (what the HELL does this mean?). 'Taker/Gonzo. Steiners/Bodies (if the Steiners win the cage match). Tatanka & Scotsmen/Bigelow & Headshrinkers. Ramon/DiBiase. Kid/IRS. Jannetty/B0rga. From the home of the Repo Man, it's SummerSlam! While the cage erection continues, Ross plugs the SummerSlam Hotline again. Read that over, it's not dirty, honest. Here is the Main Event! Money, Limited v. The Steiner Brothers for the Tag Team Titles in a Locked Steel Cage - As the rules go, the only way to win is for both team members to go over the cage and put the feet on the floor. All four members are constantly involved. I don't know how I can call this one. This match was GREAT. Several times, one member of a team would exit, only to have to go back in when his partner started getting doubleteamed. The finish came when all four men were on the outside of the cage, Rick went under Schyster, putting him on his shoulders and preventing him from leaving as Scott and DiBiase made it out. If only I hadn't know the Steiners were going to win, this match may have earned even that many more stars. Oh yeah, there's a semisuperplex off the cage, in case you were wondering (IRS on the top rope suplexes Scott from the top of the cage). What a match. It's going on my permanent tape, yep, yep. Whew. The match spans two ad breaks and over 20 minutes. Unfortunately, we end with Rappin' Randy Savage and M.O.M. doing a tribute to Lex Luger. Oh well, they can't all be gems. Rest assured, that if there are ANY developments at all on tonight's RAW, I'll let you know. Christopher Robin Zimmerman, your man on USA / zimmerma@ucrengr.ucr.edu / kzim@ucrmath.ucr.edu / kzim@watserv.ucr.edu /