QUICK QUOTE: WWF 10.95 (- .06, last year: 15 3/16, two years ago: 25)
TONIGHT: Tom Jackson says "Louisville!" and the WCW tag titles are on the
line as Jericho & Rock tackle T&T! Oh, and there's a big WrestleMania
rematch or something or other...
THIS WEEK'S TNG CAPSULE REVIEW: "Too Short a Season." SUCKED. Wow this
first season sure could be excruciating, couldn't it?
TV-14-DLV - CC - One World Leader Attitude - WWF!
Opening Credits
ARE YOU HAP-PYRO? WE ARE LIVE from the Hall of Freedom, Freedom Hall in
Louisville, KY 29.10.1, transmitido en espanol SAP and people are in WWF
New York and we're on TNN and BY GOD THIS IS RAW
TONIGHT: It's a Street Fight! Father vs. Son! And so forth!
TONIGHT: Jericho & Rock vs. Test & Booker T for the WCW tag team titles!
BILLIONAIRE VINCE leads out THE ENTIRE WWF LOCKER ROOM, who surround the
ring. Wow, look at all the people I haven't seen on RAW in forever -
Crash, Funaki, Billy Gunn....hmmm... "I am happy to report to you
tonight, I'm happy to report that at Survivor Series, the World Wrestling
Federation will wipe the Alliance off the face of this earth! And with
it, and with it the two-headed monster than runs the Alliance, Shane and
Stephanie McMahon! Last Thursday night on SmackDown!, Shane McMahon
pinned his very own mother's arms behind her back, and Stephanie slapped
her mother down to the floor. THAT ACT WILL NOT GO UNPUNISHED. As a
matter of fact, Shane, you and Stephanie...I know you can hear me, and I
would suggest you not only worry about surviving Survivor Series, but
Shane, if I were you, I'd be worrying about surviving the asskicking I'm
personally gonna give you tonight in the Street Fight! Now as far as
Survivor Series is concerned, allow me to introduce to you Team WWF. The
five members of this team will represent the World Wrestling Federation in
a ten-man elimination tag team match to determine who will WIN IT
ALL! Firstly, allow me to introduce to you the Undertaker! And the
Undertaker's brother, Kane! The Olympic Hero Kurt Angle! Y 2 J!" Crowd
chants "Rock E!" "And, the fifth person...the Rock! There you have it,
ladies and gentlemen, Team WWF, the t--" "My Time" plays at this point,
and STEFFO is out. "Hi, Daddy! Hi everybody! I'm sorry to interrupt
your little announcement, but I've got a little announcement of my
own. You see, Dad, Shane and I, well we might be a two-headed monster, we
might be ruthless, but we are definitely successful. And we are downright
clever. I mean, take last Thursday on SmackDown! for example. Shane and
I set you up good. Shane sent that phony note for you to meet him in the
parking lot, leaving poor Mom all alone in your office. And then Shane
went and grabbed - well, you know what? Let's let actions speak for
themselves!"
LAST THURSDAY: Here's the set of clips that usually opens the show. My
cable (fortunately?) cuts out at this point - we pick it up after a minute
and a half...
"...trembling and scared of what's gonna happen to her poor husband
tonight. Well, I'd like to dedicate tonight's match between my brother
(Shane McMahon) and YOU (cuts out) to MY MOM. So Mom, I hope you enjoy it
when my brother destroys my father on worldwide television. So without
further ado, allow me to introduce you to the very man who will just DO
just that - my brother, the gladiator - SHANE McMAHON." Hey, I thought
Mike Awesome was the Gladiator! "You know, Dad, nothing is gonna give me
more pleasure than tonight, coming down there and systematically tearing
you apart. Actually, there is - I just thought of something. There is
one thing that would give me great pleasure, and Dad listen to me because
this is big - this is absolutely enormous, because tonight here on RAW, a
member of your precious World Wrestling Federation will defect to the
Alliance...right here tonight! Who will it be? Matter of fact...I'm
looking (cable cuts out - I'm gonna guess Shane says "at (him/them) right
now.") So, Dad, while you still have a little teeth left....chew on
that." Vince takes a slow look around the ring. No noticable look at
anybody not looking away at him...eh, it's probably just X-Pac.
How come my cable doesn't cut out during the ADS, hmmm? I mean, I could
miss Kane wasting another four cans of Chef Boyardee when he once again
fails to remember that HE CAN'T EAT WITH THAT MASK ON
IceBreakers gum presents the WWF live at the Compaq Center of San Jose!
It's the afternoon before Vengeance so look for PPV warmups! (Actually,
the main event was announced on Metal: Austin v. Rock.) Meet Chris Benoit
at the onsale this Saturday!
Shane and Stephanie are WALKING! "You were just unbelievable out there.
I mean, the look on Dad's face - it was priceless!" Having made there way
to the door with Austin's name on it - knock - "come in!" And in we go.
Hugs and handshakes all around. "Ain't no way that they're gonna figure
out who's jumpin' to the Alliance - ain't none of 'em, they're all too
stupid to figure it out! What? I said they're too stupid to figure it
out!" "Hahahaha - say it again." "What? You guys didn't tell anybody,
did you?" "No." "I didn't tell anybody." "I didn't even tell Regal."
"I mean, the three of - (points to Debra) I didn't tell her - there's
three of - I'll tell you - tonight's gonna be a hell of a night for the
Alliance. You know what? You know what my watch is sayin'? It's sayin'
it's time for Shane McMahon to open up a can o' whoopass on his old man in
a street fight tonight, that's what it's sayin'! You kick the hell outta
him. Stand tall for the Alliance. It's our night. Loosen up, kid. If
you need any secrets, I'm here." Out they go, leaving Debra alone with
Austin to ask who's it gonna be. "What?" "You're gonna tell me, aren't
you?" "What?"
WWF INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP: ROB VAN DAM v. KING EDGE (with Rob
Zombie CD
cover) - HOLD THE PHONE! Why is Rob van Dam competing for a WWF title?
Isn't Vince trying to get the hardcore title OFF van Dam? But now van Dam
gets to go for ANOTHER piece of WWF hardware? That DOES NOT MAKE SENSE.
We can only assume Edge will go over somehow, since they didn't pursue the
more logical match story of Edge/van Dam for the hardcore championship -
if Edge gets a fall in THAT scenario, the hardcore title changes hands and
you'd think they probably want to keep the belts where they are. OR, and
this could be even more likely, they need a run-in and DQ in here and a
hardcore match wouldn't get that accomplished - in which case I stand by
my original "plot in hole is symptomatic of weak thinking writer"
bitching. Hey, I guess I could STOP bitching and "get to the damn match,
already," though, couldn't I? Right, HERE WE GO: Lockup, van Dam side
headlock...powered out, shoulderblock by van Dam (1). van Dam off the
ropes, backflip over Edge as he drops down - van Dam with a gutshot, Edge
into the ropes, van Dam hits the splits - so Edge dropkicks him in the
head (ha!). van Dam into the ropes, Edge flapjacks him. Stomp. Elbow,
into the opposite corner is reversed, van Dam somersaults into a monkey
flip attempt, but Edge lands on his feet...van Dam ducks a clothesline,
catches the kick, steps over and hits a standing spinning heel kick right
on the button. Edge rolls out to the apron and pulls himself up. van Dam
runs the ropes and puts him onto the floor with...not a roaring elbow -
more of a whispering elbow. van Dam onto the apron - FROG SPLASH!
Referee "Blind" Tim White is out to remind them that he actually counts
people out (see Heat). Everybody back in - kick by van Dam - whip into
the opposite corner is reversed, but van Dam gets the elbow up. van Dam
to the second rope...spinning heel kick, but he kinda hits him with his
butt instead - whichever, it takes Edge off his feet for 2. van Dam in
control - gutshot, elbow, elbow, Edge switches back, elbow, elbow, elbow -
van Dam manages an atomic drop - a clothesline, a backflip press and he
gets 2 again. Stomp. Elbow. Kick, right, right, elbow, (they're calling
spots!) into the opposite corner, boot up by Edge - everybody staggers -
Edge ducks a clothesline and hits a ...I dunno, let's call it a 3/4 nelson
bulldog with Edge sitting out - yeah, that's good and confusing - leaving
both men down. The count is on - both men up before 5. Into the ropes by
Edge, big back body drop - clothesline by Edge - Viscera kick - into the
ropes is reversed, van Dam with a standing heel
kick. Stomp. Split-legged moonsault - but Edge gets the knees
up! Heyman just suggested that if the Alliance won at Survivor Series,
maybe they'd "look for Schiavone or something." Looks like the WWF's
gonna win! Edge with a rollup for 2, van Dam rolls back for 2, Edge
shoves him out - but runs into a superkick. van Dam off the ropes -
Rolling Thunder hits but van Dam is slow to cover - 1, 2, Edge scissors
the arm and cradles - 1, 2, NO! van Dam misses a clothesline - Edge hits
Edge-o-matic - but only for 2! Edge with a stomp. Pulls him up - into
the opposite corner, reversed, van Dam starts a tumbling run - so Edge
SPEARS him! OH NO VAN DAM PISSED HIS PANTS AGAIN 1, 2, NO!! Edge can't
believe it. Edge slowly climbs the corner...van Dam catches him as he
hits the second floor and pulls him back with a slam. van Dam up -
Fivestar frog splash MISSES! Edge hits the DDT, which you and I knew as
the Buzzkiller and Ross knew as the Impaler - but which is NOW known as
the Edge-ucution - or to Ross NOW as the Executioner (well, he's getting
there) - at any rate, as Tony would say "that's his move!" and guess what
- 1, 2, 3 and van Dam actually gets pinned. And THAT'S why it wasn't a HC
match. See, put enough theories out there and one of 'em's GOTTA
be right! Ain't I smark - I mean smart? (5:28)
Austin likes what he sees. "Lookit RVD! He's pathetic! I tell him to
keep his feet on the ground, keep reaching for the stars, and he loses to
Edge? (knock on door) WHAT?" It's Tazz. "What do you want?" "Who is
it?" "What?" "Who's jumping ship from the WWF to the Alliance? I gotta
know, Steve, the suspense is killing me." "Are you that nosy? Are we
good buddies? I'm supposed to tell you everything I know?" "No no, wait,
wait, whoa...you know, I'm dying to know. I can understand why you
wouldn't tell...her...but c'mon! It's Tazz! You gotta let me know."
Austin chuckles. "Do you know what this watch is saying right now?" "I
actually do." "You do?" "Yeah - it's sayin' it's time for Stone Cold
Steve Austin to tell Tazz who's jumpin' from the WWF to the Alliance."
They share a laugh - then Austin stops. "That's not what it's saying.
Do you own a watch?" Tazz flashes it. "Right there." "Nice. Mind if I
have a listen?" "No doubt. What's it sayin'?" "I don't know, I don't
speak Spanish. Do you know what this watch is saying - what it's really
saying?" "No." "It's saying it'd be nice if one nosy individual would
leave my dressing room, because they're getting on my nerves, that's what
it's saying." So Tazz shoots Debra a "do you mind?" look. Austin looks
at Debra, at Tazz, back and forth, then to Tazz. "I'm talking about you!"
"Oh - OH OH OH - okay, I got you know. Okay, you're gonna tell me later,
that's cool. I'll see you later." "Don't touch. Can you believe how
nosy he is?" "I didn't think he'd ever leave - you can tell me, go
ahead." "What?" "Go ahead and just tell me." "What? What? WHAT?
Tazz lifts another truck of Stacker 2 - I think. Strangely, we only get
the "A" audio (or only the "B" audio?) this time around, so while there'e
music and effects, there's no vocal track
YAY! New Booker T Chef Boyardee ad! Best one since the Big Show!
The APA wonder aloud about what Shane said. Bradshaw brings up that
Faarooq was a former WCW Champion. "Man, that ain't no joke, man."
"Just kidding, man!" Faarooq promises whoever it is'll be in line for a
good ass whipping. Cards are down - camera pulls back to see Saturn
without mustache but with unlit cigar. "Go fish!" The APA proclaim it
not quite good enough to win. "You take all the ones, I'll take the
twenties, Ron.." "What the hell's wrong with you, man?" "Hey, they're
all bills!" Teddy Long interrupts to say that there's a big WWF meeting
and they'd like everybody to be there. "Man, who called a meeting?"
"Chris Jericho." "Jericho? I gotta see this." "Jericho.... DAMN."
"You're welcome." Well, we hit all the high spots - such as they were.
Saturn takes four beers with him. Bradshaw, interestingly (or not), has
LEFT his European title draped over a drawer of the APA file/beer
cabinet...
HURRICANE & MIGHTY MOLLY (with WrestleMania X8 tix on sale SATURDAY!
graphic) v. TAJIRI & TORRIE SAMUDA in a mixed tag - Men start - lockup,
side headlock by Tajiri - Hurricane counters to a side headlock of his own
- Tajiri powers out, but Hurricane hits the shoulderblock (2). Pose - off
the ropes - somersaulting underneath Tajiri's leapfrog - Tajiri put into
the ropes - hiptoss blocked, knee by Hurricane, leg over the back of the
neck, flippy flippy, pose - and Tajiri kicks him. Molly comes in so
Tajiri calmly steps under the clothesline, hooks her up and starts a
Spinning Rack...then lets her go when she's good and dizzy - back to
Hurricane, ducks a clothesline, chop - cable cuts out again, damn - almost
two minutes later, we're back and Tajiri is putting Hurricane in the
tarantula, but Torrie isn't in that corner anymore - the ladies must be
legal, as they're in the ring and referee "Blind" Jack Doan, seeing Molly
rolling up Torrie (but NOT seeing Molly pull the pants) moves over and
counts 1, 2, 3. (2:43) I kinda wish I'd seen this match...well, I'm over
it now, though.
The WWF cameraman has been invited to the big meeting! Jericho is ready
to address the assembled superstars - looks like everybody except Taker,
Kane and Rock. "Guys, can I have your attention, please? Thank you.
Now when I first came to the WWF over two years ago from the WCW, I did it
for a reason. And that reason was this: working in the WCW and in ECW
were some of worst experiences I ever had in my personal career. And now,
I love the WWF. Do you? Do you LOVE the WWF? That's what I thought.
Well I'm not about to stand around while the World Wrestling Federation
gets SCREWED just because some coward wants to jump to the Alliance. Now
every single WWF superstar is not in this room right now, but chances are
whoever is thinking aboat jumping to the Alliance IS in this room right
now. So let me make it simple, let me throw out an open challenge to the
coward that wants to jump if you're in here...show your face. Show some
guts and reveal yourself right now - let's see who you are." Rock's
walked in behind him at this point...and clears his throat. "Well like
the old saying goes, FINALLY the Rock decided to show up to the meeting."
Murmurs abound. "Who in the blue hell do you think YOU are? Organising a
meeting? Rallying the WWF troops? Since when did you - YOU - you become
the leader of the WWF?" "Well I guess I, *I* became the leader of the WWF
the moment I beat YOU for the WCW Championship, ROCK." "Oooh!" Rock
smiles. "Hold the Rock's belt. Thank you, Spike. You know, Chris?"
"What, Rock." "You may have won the big one...once. Once. But remember
- never forget that the Rock has been winning big ones for YEARS. The
Rock was winning big ones when you were down there in WCW on Monday Nitro
getting your monkey ass whipped by Juventud Guerrera." Everybody cracks
up. I think Jeff Hardy just asked somebody who Juventud Guerrera is.
"Chris. You came from the WCW...(pats belt)...you're the WCW Champion.
You *are* WCW, but remember - always remember, that the Rock...is the WWF
- and will always be the WWF. Rock can look around this room at every
person here - look into their eyes - and realise that no one is stupid
enough to jump ship. No one is stupid enough to jump ship....unless,
someone is (looks at Jericho) stupid enough to jump ship." Rock and
Jericho share a long stare - and Rock turns back. "Ladies and gentlemen,
thank you. But this meeting is now adjourned." One more staredown before
Rock takes off - and the meeting breaks up. Jericho has a "why'd he have
to bring up Quasi Juice?" look on his face. I might as well point out
that X-Pac had the most prominent seat in this shot....which probably
makes him a red herring THIS time. ("Man, you waffle more than an IHOP.")
It's called SHARING MY THOUGHT PROCESS and PROVIDING ANALYSIS. ("Well,
you're half right on the analysis part - the first half of the word at
least.")
Earlier Today at the University of Louisville, Kurt Angle and Bradshaw led
the last Smackdown Your Vote! rally of 2001.
Back to the Austins. "How stupid is that? Having a meeting - trying to
find out who's gonna be the big defector tonight. They'll never know.
Come in! William Regal." "Stone Cold - Debra, how are you." "How ya
doin'." "I know why you sent for me - you want to tell me who's going to
join the Alliance, right?" "No, that's not why I sent for you - I'm not
gonna tell you who's joinin' the Alliance." "Why not?" "Because you're
the commissioner!" "I know I'm the commissioner - that's why you need to
tell me who's joining the Alliance." "No! I wanna tell you how important
you are to the Alliance!" "Thank you." "You got a big match tonight."
"Yes." "You're gonna stand tall." "Oh yes." "You got a match against
Kurt Angle." "Yes." "You're gonna bring the United States championship
BACK home to the Alliance - that's why you're here, that's what I wanted
to tell you. And you know what? Speaking of Kurt Angle, I want you to
put the word out on the street that I need to see that man in my dressing
room - private - before your match. I need to talk to him." Regal makes
the confused face. "Thank you very much. Good luck." "No...thank you
for thinking of me--" "I'm always thinking of you - thank you." "Kurt
Angle?" "Yeah, I wanna see him before your match. In private. Thank
you." "No, thank you." "Thank you." Debra: "Thanks." Regal takes off.
"Thank you." "Thank you." "What?"
Meanwhile, the Fun Brothers discuss strategy vis a vis their upcoming
match with the Dudley Boyz. Jericho barges in. "So there you are, I've
been looking all over for you guys! A WWF superstar is defecting to the
Alliance tonight! And I can't find you guys - we just had a meeting with
the ENTIRE WWF roster, and there's no Taker, there's no Kane, where the
hell were you? Huh? HUH?" Taker turns to his brother. "Can you believe
this guy?" Stands up. "Who in THE hell do you think you are barging into
our dressing room, running off at the mouth? And who the hell is Chris
Jericho to call a WWF meeting? Let me remind you, you little sawed off
pissant - while you were running around sucking your thumb in diapers, I
was kicking people's asses here, so I don't need to hear - what?" Kane
attempts to pull him back. "He's just a little bit excited, man, come
on..." "Why don't you BACK OFF little brother?" "Hey hey hey hey hey -
first of all, that's exactly why we need you at a time like this, Taker -
you've been here for ten years, everybody respects you, everybody knows
who you are, we need you right now, and second of all, before you get too
excited, you're not the one that I'm insinuating is gonna jump to the
Alliance..." Jericho looks back - Taker turns back - and Kane cocks his
head.
"Halloween Hijinx" ad
DIAMOND DALLAS PAGE is out to kill off another segment. "It's ME! D - D
- P! And do I have a surprise for all of you. You see, I know who's
leaving the WWF and coming to the Alliance. You see, Shane McMahon said
he's BIG - I mean, he's HYOOOGE. A superstar of gigantic proportions!
Ladies and gentlemen, the superstar surprise IS...the Big Show! And let
me tell you way - because now the Big...wait a minute, first of all, the
WWF superstars - let me tell you what they think of the Big Show - they
think he's a freak - who makes funny noises - and, he's overweight and out
of shape. But - that's not a bad thing - THAT'S a GOOD thing. Why?
Because now the Big Show knows that his friends are really in the
Alliance." WELL IT'S THE BIG SHOW dutifully makes his entrance. "All
right - all right!" We all know where this is going - but we all want to
see it. Show has a big smile during his big walk to the ring. "It's THE
BIG SHOW! And Big Show, I like you. And I know YOU like me. And
together with the Alliance, I'm going to help YOU like YOU. You got it,
baby - hey, welcome aboard - welcome to the Alliance - put 'er there, Big
Man - put her ARRRRRRRRRRGH" ahhhhhTHECHOKESLAAAAAM play his music again
thank you good night
Kurt Angle meets with Vince McMahon. Vince thinks he's there because he's
worried about his US title defense against Regal, but he has nothing to
worry about - Vince has supreme confidence in him. "Mr. McMahon...I'm
gonna beat Regal tonight, I don't have a problem with that, I'm gonna take
him out - but that's not what this is all about. This is something even
more important. Stone Cold Steve Austin wants to have a meeting with ME,
tonight - with me! I mean, I don't know what it's all about, I wanted to
come to you because...I don't know what he wants. I mean, I just kicked
his butt all over the place the last few months, he wants to have a
meeting with me." "I don't trust that son of a bitch." "Neither do I!
I mean, I'll kick his butt again, Mr. McMahon, you give me the word, I'll
do it. Whoa whoa whoa, wait a minute - why are you lookin' at me like
that? Why are you looking at me? Mr. McMahon, I worked too damn hard to
get this company where it is. I've been with you. I became the WWF
Champion, now you're giving me that look?" "All right, all right, all
right, all right okay, look. Have your meeting with Stone Cold, all
right? Find out - find out what he has on his mind. And um...I was gonna
use this (produces 2x4) in my match, but maybe you wanna take this into
your meeting with Stone Cold as a token of my appreciation." "All right.
I will. I'll tell you what, if he gives me any problems, I'll knock his
head off." "Good." "And I'll tell you what - good luck in your street
fight with Shane McMahon. You kick his butt. You show him who's the
boss. All right?" "I'll do just that." They shake hands. "All right,
you do it. I'll see you later, after I...have my meeting."
UP NEXT: Y2J & the Rock take on Booker T & Test!
The WWF Rewind is juicy because it's brought to you by Starburst! Isn't
life juicy? From SmackDown!, Booker T trips up the Rock and clocks him
with a trashcan, leading to van Dam pinning him - later, Test and T beat
up Rock and Jericho
WWF TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP: T (with RAW is brought to you by the JVC
Giga-Tube, Twix and Honda!) and T (with RAW credits & transmitido en
espanol SAP & TV-14-DLV & CC) v. CHRIS MONDAY JERICHO & THE
ROCK - I'm not going to bitch again about how the Alliance is getting
another shot at a WWF title, BUT I COULD. Your referee is Mike Chioda.
Rock and Jericho share a few words, but Rock turns his back when Jericho
tells him Booker's trying to make a move - Rock right, right, right, righ,
right, chop, slap, chop, slap, into the opposite corner is reversed...but
Rock pops out with a clothesline. Samoan Drop. 1, 2, T kicks out. Tag
to Jericho - running kick - chop, chop, chop, into the opposite corner,
back elbow. Head to the buckle, kick, kick, kick, kick, kick, kick,
right, right, chop, chop, into the opposite corner, reversed, but Jericho
gets up the elbow - second rope - missile dropkick - 1, 2, T kicks out.
Wow, T's done NADA thus far. Knee to the head by Jericho, right, chop,
chop - into the ropes is reversed, Test gets a forearm in Jericho's back -
Jericho turns back and elbows HIM off the apron...but runs smack dab into
a whip spinebuster from Booker. FINALLY he makes the tag - Test comes in
and takes it to Jericho - that's nine piston rights in rapid succession.
Head to the buckle by Test, right, back elbow, right, back elbow, right,
kick, kick, kick, kick, kick. "Rock E" chant. Test takes Jericho to the
opposite corner and follows with a clothesline. Test stands on the neck
and uses the ropes for a little help. Vertical suplex - gets 2. Test
goes to the headlock. Jericho eventually elbows out, elbow, chop, chop,
into the ropes, reversal, Jericho manages a rollup for 2. Test quickly
comes back with Uncle Slam for 2. Tag to Booker - held open for the kick
to the gut. Arm wringer into back kick by T - quickly becoming one of his
trademark spots. Nice bodyslam - cover - T gets 2. Jericho comes back
with a forearm, chop, right, T with a knee in the abdomen. Into the ropes
is reversed, Jericho with a flapjack - Jericho should have broken into a
breakdance, but alas. Jericho DOES try to crawl to his corner...only to
have T stop him by grabbing the leg. Jericho with an enzuigiri to break
it up - but he's down hard as well. Now reaching - ROCK reaching - crowd
going nuts - tag to Test - HOT TAG TO ROCK!
"Iblockyourpunchyoudon'tblockmine," right, right, right, right, right,
Test is wobbly, right, Test flails, right, off the ropes, flying
clothesline FINALLY takes him off his feet! T in - block, right, right,
into the ropes, belly-to-belly throw. Ducks a punch from Test, gutshot,
DDT - T tossed over the ropes to the floor - right for Test, right, right,
right, NOW KISS THAT OHHHHHHH HE GOT JERICHO when Test ducked! Test with
a right - Rock into the ropes - Rock ducks the Wotsitolla and hits the
spinebuster! Rock tosses his armband to the crowd, but behind him we see
Jericho entering the ring - JERICHO WITH A BULLDOG ON THE ROCK! JERICHO
WITH THE STROKE!! Rock almost botches his landing - I guess he never had
to take that before. Jericho rolls out of the ring...but runs back in as
Test tries to make the cover, breaking it up JUST before 3. Jericho with
ANOTHER Stroke on Test (and another poor sell - man bring in Jeff Jarrett
to school these guys!) and Jericho goes back to his corner to ask for the
tag. Rock is slowly back to his feet...looks at Jericho...finally decides
to MAKE the tag, but brings in Jericho the hard way! OHHH ROCK BOTTOM ON
JERICHO! Jericho and Test are both left laying in the ring...Rock LEAVES
THE RING AND WALKS UP THE RAMP... Test AGAIN tries to hook the leg - 1,
2, Rock BARELY makes it back and makes the save! All four men in the ring
- T with a right on Rock, right, into the ropes - Rock tries a reversal
but T lands a back kick before Rock can whip him. Harlem sidekick - but
Rock ducks and IT HITS TEST! Jericho quickly tries to put on the Walls of
Jericho while Rock has T - right, right, right, ROCK BOTTOM - TEST IS
TAPPING!! Champs retain! (8:07) You know, the BEST stories are told IN
THE RING. Champs take back their belts...and give each other the evil
eye. Words are exchanged...but for now, words are all the happens.
Kurt Angle is WALKING! He's got his 2x4 but not his American flag.
Making sure the cameraman is following him to capture the carnage on tape
(I guess), he blows into the room and threatens to swing...but it's only
Austin and Debra cowering into the cubby holes. "What are you doin'?"
"You wanted to see me?" "Yeah I wanted to see ya. Can't you knock?"
"Yeah I can knock!" "Put the 2x4 down. I don't wanna fight you, I've
already fought you. Settle down, you can trust me. I promise." "Oh
trust YOU, right?" "I promise. I wanted to see ya because I wanted to
ask ya straight up, man to man - easy - I wanted to ask you-- straight up,
man to man, I'm asking you to join the Alliance right now. You might as
well join up with a winning team. Stone Cold Steve Austin is a part of
it. Whaddaya say?" "What?" "I'M ASKING--" "I HEARD YOU, AUSTIN."
"Then what's it gonna be." "You want me to join the Alliance?" "That's
what I'm saying." "I'll tell you what - all right. Let's say I join the
Alliance. Okay, that's fine. Well you tell me - who's the big player
making the big impact tonight? Who's crossing over to the Alliance
tonight? Huh? Who is it, Austin? Is it the Rock? Huh? 'cause that's
something you would do. It's the Rock, right?" "I can't tell you that -
I can't tell you that. I can't tell you everything I know. You got a big
match tonight, I can tell you good luck. That's what I can tell you.
And I can tell you another thing. I can tell you--" "YOU don't need to
tell me nothin'." "What." "I don't need luck, Austin. And I'll tell you
what - I'll tell YOU something." "What." "You can go to hell!" He
leaves. "YOU CAN'T TELL ME TO GO TO HELL! If he hadn't had that 2x4...he
cain't talk to me like that!" Austin slams down his baseball cap.
I don't know about you, but I've always thought that looking at the
exterior of the Freedom Hall would certainlly be one of the highlights of
television
Xbox presents Surv1vor Series!
MICHAEL KING COLE attempts to get some comments from the Rock. "Yeah, the
Rock'll tell you his comments. And it's as simple as this: Chris Jericho
you wanna try the Rock? When you try the Rock, you must prepare to GET -
your monkey ass - WHOOPED!" Cole says he was actually hoping for some
comments in reaction to Kurt Angle's comments. Of course, Rock hadn't
heard them yet so Cole stooges him off. Rock's expression changes.
"Where is Kurt Angle's locker room?" And off he goes...
STACY DUDLEY (with Let Us Take You Back to SmackDown!) v. LITA
Heyman: "I'm in love!" Ross: "With a WOMAN? Wow." Stacy gets first
stomp as Lita goes through the ropes - Lita responds with a right. Lita
goes for a hiptoss but Keibler handstands through - and laughs. Stacy
ducks a clothesline. "Twice!" So Lita makes the next clothesline land.
Lita with an alleged sidewalk slam and hooks a leg for 2. Into the corner
- Stacy with the boot up five minutes too early - head to the buckle,
kick, kick, boot on the neck (YEAH SPREAD 'EM THAT'S THE MONEY SHOT) -
referee "Blind" Chad "defected to the WCW but nobody noticed but me"
Patton breaks it up at the 5 count. Stacy and Patton share a moment so
Lita can charge up for her big comeback...switch in the corner, right by
Lita, right, right, right, snap suplex, leg is hooked - 1, 2, no. Stacy
manages a jawbreaker. Whip into the corner is reversed - Stacy up and
over - legs on the shoulders, so Lita just tosses her over the top to the
floor. Lita up to the top - SHE dives to the floor, missing everything
but the barricade RIGHT in the gut. MATT HARDY is out to check on his
woman...then puts her back in the ring (hey, disqualify her, ref!).
Stacy is up now - and thinks Matt is out to help HER. Big smiles. Matt
makes a big speech for Lita's benefit - Stacy gets unhappy and slaps him
one. Matt grabs her, rares back for the punch - ohhhh but he elbowed Lita
on the backswing. This is a TRAGEDY. Stacy back in - 1, 2, NO! Stacy
grabs Lita - whip attempt is reversed into a quick gutshot and neckbreaker
and 1, 2, 3 (2:49) - Matt comes into the ring but Lita ain't interested.
Matt tries to apologise, but I think we all know what Lita's thinking:
"Eddie Guerrero FINALLY comes back to me next week..."
RAW magazine ad - Rock brings it on the cover
Angle's preparing for his match as Rock finds him. "Angle!" "Hey,
Rock." "'Hey, Rock.' 'Hey, Rock.' The Rock was just informed that you
were in Stone Cold Steve Austin's locker room. Talkin' about the
Rock. Talkin' about Rock in Stone Cold Steve Austin's locker
room. Insinuating, implying that the Rock is turning his back against the
WWF, and the ONLY thing you have to say is... 'hey, Rock.'" "First of
all--" "Whoa. What were you even doing in Stone Cold's locker room to
begin with?" "Hold on a second. I got permission from Mr. McMahon. All
right? I went in there to knock Austin's head off with a 2x4! I wanted
to get information from Austin, that's what I was doing!" "You got
permission? You got permission from Vince McMahon? Information from
Austin with a 2x4, 6x8, 8x10, it doesn't matter to the Rock! Kurt
Angle, don't you ever question the Rock's loyalty to the WWF. The Rock
lives, breathes and will DIE WWF. Kurt Angle, don't you ever say that the
Rock is...turning...his back against the WWF. You want information? The
Rock'll give you alllll the information you need. The Rock isn't turning
against the WWF, and the only thing you should worry about is the Rock
take his boot, and *turning* it sideways, and shoving it straight
up...your punk ass. Kurt...how does the Rock know...that it's not
you...who's turning his BACK on the WWF." "Come on, Rock. Get
serious. ME. I don't think so." Rock looks him up and down...locks eyes
with him - is he gonna kiss him? - no, he just walks away."
Let's look at Times Square!
Inside is COMMISSIONER McFOLEY, complete with copy of Halloween Hijinx, #6
on the New York Times bestseller list. Foley says we need to watch the
Today show Wednesday morning. Foley says if they have Matt Lauer or Al
Roker interviewing him instead of Katie Couric, people may see a big, ugly
man crying on live national television. Ross asks Foley why he made the
WWF tag team title match. Foley says after SmackDown!, Rock and Jericho
asked HIM to make the match, so he cut a deal with Regal - in exchange for
giving T&T a shot at the WWF tag titles, he had to give Taker & Kane a
shot at the Dudleyz' WCW tag titles. Well, that explains everything but
Rob van Dam's IC shot...baby steps, Chris, baby steps. Oh, Mick's on
TOMORROW'S Today show, not Wednesday's, okay.
William Regal warms up!
UP NEXT: Kurt Angle takes on William Regal for the US Championship!
Music video: WWF presents "Desire," by Creed
WCW U.S. TITLE: COMMISSIONER REGAL v.
- Regal has new music that, in my uneducated snap judgement, doesn't work
at all - we'll see if I change my mind on that in a few weeks. Hey, Nick
Patrick is back! Angle makes the mistake of trying a corner pose, and
Regal pounces with a forearm in the back. Left Euro elbow, elbow, elbow -
left - into the ropes, reversed, back elbow by
Regal. Clothesline. Clothesline. Regal's outside, Angle's
following. Chop. Hard into the barricade. Regal manages a boot in the
gut - tossed into the ropes, and Angle bounces back to the floor. Regal
puts him back in - another European elbow. European forearm. Into the
ropes is reversed, backdrop out - Angle gets 2. Right, right, right, into
the ropes, reversed, back elbow by Regal - 1, 2, no. 1, 2, no. 1, 2,
no. Angle breaks it up - right, right, right, knee by Regal, off the
ropes with a big collision. Stomp. Regal with a...half nelson
chinlock? Man I'm seeing all SORTS of moves tonight. Ross calls it a
"neck vice," that's as good as any. Two more big matches to come
tonight! "USA!" Angle manages a gobehind - but eats a back elbow. Angle
blocks the left - chop, chop, chop, right, right, into the ropes, reversed
- Angle ducks the clothesline - Regal catches the crossbody and crotches
him on top - then kicks him off the ropes to the apron. Forearm to the
face, forearm, stomp. Angle manages to barrel him into the corner -
right, right, right, fireman's carry takeover out of the corner,
clothesline, clothesline, right, right, into the ropes - no, pulls him
back - belly-to-belly suplex! Forearm in the back - German suplex - two -
let's go. Wooow! DOWN COME THE STRAPS! Angle tries to grab Regal for
the Olympic Slam, but he knees him in the head to break it up. Regal off
the ropes - but Angle catches the leg and applies the Anglelock! Regal
has no choice but to tap. (3:27)
"What the hell YOU want?" Looks like Vince is paying Taker a visit.
"You need something?" "Chill, okay? I simply walked in here tonight to
wish you...(long look)...to wish you good luck in your match." "You come
in to wish me good luck. If that ain't the biggest crock I've ever heard!
I've been here ten years, almost eleven, and I ain't even got as much as a
'kiss my ass' outta you, and now all of a sudden you gonna come into my
dressing room and wish me luck? I don't think so! Vince, why don't you
just lighten up a little bit. Why don't you tell me why you're really in
here? The fact of the matter is, you're a little bit nervous tonight!
You're nervous the old Taker's gonna screw you over. Or maybe if it ain't
Taker, it's Kane. That's what you're really all about, isn't it? Hey,
big man! Vince came to wish us luck tonight!" Vince looks back...and
back to Taker. "Yeah. Good luck." "Hey, Vince...I don't need any luck.
But I think you do." Vince gives Kane one more look - back to Taker - and
leaves.
WCW TAG TEAM TITLE: DUDLEY BOYZ (with Stacy Dudley) v. AWESOME UNDERTAKER
WHO IS AWESOME & ALSO PRETTY GOOD KANE - Stacy is limping from her earlier
match - D-Von and Kane start - D-Von with a gutshot, right, side
headlok...powered out by Kane, Kane with a shoulderblock (hey THAT'S a new
variation!). Gutshot, into the corner, sidewalk slam out. Off the ropes
with an elbow. Arm wringer - tag to Taker - open kick, soupbone,
soupbone, soupbone, left, soupbone, back elbow, into the opposite corner,
avalanche (!), free shot for Bubba Ray - D-Von into the ropes, head down,
kick by D-Von, no effect - Bubba Ray lowers the bridge as Taker tries to
come off the ropes, though, taking him outside. Crowd is really booing
something that has nothing to do with this match. Stomp by Bubba Ray -
hard into the STEEL steps. Taker put back in - right by D-Von, tag to
Bubba Ray - double team in the corner. Right by Bubba Ray, forearm in the
back - back comes Taker - soupbone, soupbone, gutshot, into the corner,
follow clothesline, apron clothesline for D-Von, Bubba Ray manages a
clothesline to turn it around. Tag to D-Von - into the ropes, double back
elbow, double free shot for Kane. WHAT DOES "BUBBA RED" MEAN, ROSS?!?
Back to Taker - back into the ropes but THIS time Taker hits the double
clothesline! Taker looks to his corner but Kane is still out on the floor
- Taker ain't too happy about this. Taker looks back - but falls into a
double death suplex by the Dudleyz. That's a whole lotta D's there.
D-Von 1, 2, NO! Kane's back up in his corner. Tag to Bubba Ray - open
shot. Right by Bubba Ray, ducks a soupbone, another right. Into the
ropes, head down - Taker with his DDT. Both men are down - both men on
the outside reaching for a tag. Tag to Kane, tag to D-Von - Kane right,
right, into the corner, follow clothesline. To the opposite corner,
uppercut out. Into the ropes, big boot. Bubba Ray in, HE gets a
clothesline. Kane goes up - flying clothesline hits D-Von - 1, 2, NO!
Taker in - soupbone, kick, and that takes care of Bubba Ray but it also
monopolises the attention of referee "Blind" Brian Hebner, who is trying
in vain to get Taker back in his corner - in fact, Taker is ready to pop
HIM one. Meanwhile, Kane has the cover but no ref to make a count AND
Stacy is feeding one of the championship belts to Bubba Ray. Kane up,
trying to have a word with his brother....and now taking the belt shot
from Bubba Ray ohhhhhhhhh no. D-Von drapes an arm - 1, 2, Taker breaks it
up! Bubba Ray comes in - Taker ducks the swing, arm wringer, yanking the
arm, up to the top for Old Skool....but unfortunately, Kane staggers back
into the ropes, breaking it up - (actually, Taker falls before it
happens...but you *could* argue he saw Kane coming for him and that's why
he fell early) - Kane falls into 3D (Dudley Death Drop) and D-Von covers -
1, 2, 3. Champs retain and we got some more people pissed off at each
other. (4:57) Taker pulls himself up into the ring...
And we break away because Shane McMahon is WALKING!
Vince McMahon, also, has caught wind of the latest craze - WALKING!
WrestleMania X8 tix on sale SATURDAY! Order at Skydome, online at
WrestleMania.com or charge by phone!
And now, the WWF Slam of the Week, presented by Burger King! From
SmackDown!, Shane and Stephanie save the drama for their momma
SHANO v. BILLIONAIRE VINCE in a Street Fight - Maybe Earl Hebner will
turn.....nah, too easy. Shane doesn't want to let Vince get in the ring,
trying to kick through the ropes. Hebner tries to hold Shane back but
isn't having much luck. Shane finally tries the baseball slide out but
Vince is waiting - right, (bell rings) right, right, and Shane trips on
the ramp. Vince mounts and punches. I DARE Jim Ross to call this
"bowling show ugly." Vince throttles his son. More rights. Vince grabs
a "KEEP OFF" sign off the barricade - and whacks Shane in the back.
Field goal kick. WHACK in the head. Vince throws Shane into the STEEL
steps. Running kick. Shane has made sure to wear a well-tucked-in shirt
underneath his jersey lest we catch sight of his abs - and I'm not sure
how we would underneath the layers of ("hey, that's a low blow - you ain't
YOUR ideal weight, neither.") Yeah, but I hide behind a computer to look
thin. Hey, lookit the BUBBLE GUN in the crowd! Awesome! Camera quick
shift shots to avoid seeing it. Shane rammed into the post. Another
field goal kick. Shane finally fires back - no luck. Double sledge by
Vince - and another one. Vince grabs the cable and chokes away. Vince
back to another cable choke. Vince tosses Shane into the ring (THEY'RE
GOING IN THE RING?!?) and looks for plundah (oh) underneath - garbage can,
lid, can, lid, can, kendo stick, lid, can - back in for another field
goal. Vince gets bleeped as he raises a can - but Shane lands an uppernut
before he can use it. Shane takes a garbage can lid to Vince's back -
WHACK - WHACK WHACK WHACK WHACK WHACK. "You wanna play with me? You
wanna play?" Snap elbowdrop, elbowdrop, elbowdrop. Shane rolls him over
and rabbit punches him (four). Shane with a can - can in the chest.
Shane places the can on Vince's chest...and starts his climb to the
top....ohh no SHOOTING STAR PRESS but it MISSES and Shane squashes the
garbage can instead! You bet that gets an Xbox Replay (two angles).
Vince attempts to capitalize - double sledge. Vince grabs a can...no,
puts it down. He's got the Singapore cane - stick in the back! Stick in
the belly! STICK! STICK! STICK! Vince waits for Shane to get up...and
clotheslines him out of the ring. Shane out of the ring - Vince down the
stairs. Vince to the commentary table - top is gone. Crowd chants
"table" as Vince rearranges the furniture. Monitors and fans away - Vince
turns back to catch a garbage can lid from Shane RIGHT in the face!
WHACK again! And one in the back. MONITOR to the head! Vince is dead on
the table - and Shane is looking behind him at the turnbuckles one more
time. Back in the ring - vault to the top - Savage elbow from the far
turnbuckle to the table, allegedly landing somewhere near Vince as well!
They're both out. Xbox replay, each angle more charitable than the last.
I wonder when somebody jumps to the Alliance...no, wait. Shane pulls
Vince up, carries him on his back, rolled into the ring - I guess falls
don't count anywhere in this match. Cover - 1, 2, VINCE GETS THE SHOULDER
UP!! Crowd goes silent, wondering when the run-in will happen. Kick by
Shane, kick, kick. Shane with a right, right. Shane with the can - can
to the back of the head. Shane puts the can between the ropes - and
Vince's head rests between the corner and the can. "Dad, hold this can up
for me, would ya?" The camera no longer looks at Vince as Shane climbs to
the top - another van Terminator? Well, he TRIES it - but Vince manages
to put the can into Shane's knees in mid-dropkick! So it was OKAY that he
was holding it - ohhhh here's T&T to keep Vince from covering - and now
here's the FUN BROTHERS - no turns yet - Test dumped over the top by Kane
- he follows - DOUBLE BIG BOOT and they're both out. Back in the ring,
Booker T takes the Last Ride (and a heroic effort on T's part to stay in
position instead of Testing it up) but COMMISSIONER REGAL lands an
uppernut on Taker. UNION JACK!! Regal stomps until ROCK comes out -
right, right, right, right, ROCK BOTTOM!! Stomping away - STONE COLD
STEVE AUSTIN KICK WHAM STUNNER ON THE ROCK! KURT ANGLE is next in our
rumble - he's got a chair and Austin begs off - CHRIS MONDAY JERICHO right
behind Angle NOOOOO ANGLE JUST CHAIRED JERICHO WAS IT INTENTIONAL OR AN
ACCIDENT OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ANGLE JUST CHAIRED ROCK IT WAS NOT AN
ACCIDENT NO NO NO ANGLE CHAIRS TAKER ANGLE CHAIRS KANE NO NO NO NO NO NO
NO NO NO Austin picks up Vince - KICK WHAM STUNNER (kinda) and Shane's put
on top - OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH - 1, 2, 3
WHYYYYYYYYYYY(11:11)YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY Shane, Austin and Angle are the
last men standing...Houston, we have a problem.