KINGS UPDATE: 19-8 (2.5 GB) Please PLEASE GET BETTER CWEBB
UPN - Thursday!
EARLIER TODAY! (TV-PG-DLV) Booker T smiles - but stops when Flair takes
the other end of the sofa. What's he doing in Mr. McMahon's office?
"The same thing you are, waiting on the man." Flair brandishes a
clipboard. When T fails to ask, Flair eggs him on. "Aren't you gonna
ask?" "What up?" "What have you been waiting for for six months? Vince
and I worked all day. He wants the deal done, it's done; it's your
contract." Flair doesn't like it, but Vince is his partner and he's gonna
play ball. "What's your deal, man?" "I ain't got no deal, I ain't got no
agenda. For some reason he sees you to the WWF like basketball and Jordan
and hockey and Gretzky - he sees you as a player." T insinuates that he's
just trying to get back on Vince's good side after Monday's figure four.
"You don't get it. I'm jumpin' on because I wanna be a team player and I
wanna make this work. He sees you in that light - I'm gonna work with
it." T asks to check it out - then lights up as Flair relates that that's
a "couple hundred grand more" than he wanted to put on the table. T
pronounces it "bling bling" and "a whole lotta ducats" and then quickly
gets a pen to sign it. "And....you don't think I deserve this, huh."
"No, I don't." "Lemme tell ya somethin', I'm worth this...and a whole lot
more, now can U DIG IT, sucka. Now take this and go do what you do, man.
Go do what you do." Flair shakes his hand and wishes him happy
holidays...then gives a smile as he checks something in the contract on
his way out. Yep...
Opening Credits (close captioned) are beautiful, people!
PUH-PUH-PYRO - it's the New Orleans Arena in Guess Where, LA 20.12.1
(taped 18.12) SAP transmitido en espanol and TONIGHT: Rock takes on Test!
not to mention so much more - all tonight - on SMACKDOWN!
WWF INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP: KURT
ANGLE v. KING EDGE (with Rob Zombie CD cover - and snazzy LUGZ
T-shirt) - Big staredown to start. Lockup, jockeying for position - Angle
barrels him to the corner - referee "Blind" Mike Chioda forces the break.
"Angle sux!" chant. Lockup, waistlock by Edge, running Angle to the
corner (trying to elbow out, nope), and another break. War of words in
the middle - Angle tries to go to the closed fist, but it's blocked -
forearm by Edge, forearm, forearm, into the ropes, nice heel kick. Stomp
in the corner, stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp - Chioda pushes *Edge*
off. Into the opposite corner is reversed, but Edge pops out with a
clothesline. Into the ropes, Angle holds on and pulls himself out.
Chioda starts counting...Angle takes advantage of a distracted Edge to
ankle him out - chop, chop, head to the STEEL steps. Angle puts him back
in...and follows. Right to the back of the head, right, stomp, stomp,
stomp. Into the ropes, back elbow. Cover - 1, kicked out at 2. Blatant
choke on the second rope - knee in the back of the head to add leverage.
Break. Right hand. Right, right, right, stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp,
stomp, Chioda pulls him off. Angle stands him up and chops away. Wooow!
Edge fires back - elbow, right, right, right, into the ropes, reversed by
Angle, Edge ducks, crossbody...but Edge comes up punching instead of
covering. Broken up - clothesline by Edge, clothesline, duck,
Edge-o-matic and hooks the legs - 1, 2, no! Edge waits for him to get up
- gutshot - DDT BLOCKED - Angle grabs a waistlock - Edge elbows out of the
German suplex attempt - Edge with a belly-to-belly suplex!! Edge waiting
for him to get up...here comes the SPEAR - NO, Angle tries to shove Chioda
into the path but Edge pulls up - Chioda moved aside and Angle is waiting
with a BIG kick to the nuts. Oops, but Chioda saw it. See ya. (DQ 3:45)
Angle and Chioda have quite a tet a tet - Angle pushing Chioda around,
Chioda countering with a mighty point of his WWF patch. Angle decides to
go back to work on Edge - right, right, right, into the ropes is reversed,
Edge with a Viscera kick! There's the half nelson facebusting bulldoglike
thing! But Edge walks RIGHT into an Anglelock. Choida desperately tries
to pull Angle off of him but has no luck - and ends up getting CLOCKED, as
well. Back to the anklelock - a gaggle of REFS come out...and DO manage
to pull Angle off of him. Play his music 'cause he LOST!
T is hip hop happy and awaiting Vince's limo. Big hug for a surprised
Vince - "I wanna thank you for all them zeroes!" Vince seems to not know
about that fat contract. Flair steps in at this point (Vince: "I OWE YOU
ONE!") and reveals that because he's now the sole property of the World
Wrestling Federation, he's booked to wrestle tonight on SmackDown!...oh,
by the way, it's against Stone Cold Steve Austin...oh, by the way, it's a
First Blood match. Vince and Booker share comical facial expressions in
reaction. Time for that first ad break!
Jakks Pacific's WWF RealSounds Arena ad - just in time for Christmas!
Yikes, make that RealSounds Arena ad #2 in the same break - it MUST be
Here come THE
ROCK to say a few words and/or show off his BIG, BIG belt buckle.
"Finally, the Rock HAS COME BACK to Nawlins!" Where's Lash LeRoux when
you need him? "Tonight, the Rock goes one on one...with Test. Oh yes,
Test, Test, the man who has immunity. And just let the Rock get something
straight, right here, right now, Test. You see, ever since you won your
immunity, you been runnin' around, flexin' your muscles, pickin' on
referees, pickin' on announcers, pickin' on women. You know, that's
really impressive, Test, but the fact remains, is just because you cannot
get fired does not mean you cannot get your (beep) whooped! And the Rock
is a little confused about something; you see, Test, you have immunity,
which means you should be happy, which means you should be *smiling.* But
see, you're not smiling, you're walking around with a frown on your face,
walkin' around angry, MEAN - and the Rock was thinking, what exactly are
you angry about? WHO are you angry at? Just like that, the Rock figured
it out - you're not angry with the referees, the announcers, the women,
you're not even angry at the Rock - Test...the one man who you hate more
than anyone else in this world....Sssssssanta Claus. Oh yeah, Test, the
Rock figured it out. The Rock figured it out, and it all goes back to
that letter you wrote to Santa Claus when you were a little kid. You
remember that letter, Test, went like this: (imitating Test) 'Dear
Santa...you ride around on a sled, what's that all aboat. But anyway,
(almost says "the Rock" instead of "I") I'll keep it really short and
sweet, the only thing I want for Christmas is my two - front - teef.' But
you see, Test, the Rock says you better be careful of what you - wish for
because you just might get it, and just like Santa, the Rock has a list,
he checks it twice, and after last night, you see the Rock DROVE about a
hundred and ten miles, crossed a lake called the Pontchartrain [I hate it
when they talk about local stuff I have to look up in order to spell -
that's TWICE this week] ....a very very big lake, long bridge, and the
Rock was thinking about three things on his list - #3 is that the Rock
gets a rematch with Chris Jericho and, once he gets that rematch, becomes
the Undisputed champion. #2, since the Rock is here, the Rock wants a
does, a nice big healthy dose of that Big Easy - MMM Pie! And #1, #1,
Test, is that you and the Rock, tonight, the Rock whoops your candy(beep)
live, live on the Rock's show, LIVE on SmackDown! But you see, Test,
before you go one on one with the great one, the Rock wants to leave you
with something, leave you and and your angry face with something tonight -
seeing as this is the holiday season, we are ALLLLL in the holiday
ssssspirit....Test, there's a song, and it's called "The Twelve Days of
Christmas." And you see, Test, the Rock wants to sing you twelve things
that you can look forward to tonight. And the Rock'll go slow at first
for you, Test, just so you can understand, it goes like this. 'On a night
Test faced the great one, this is what he'll see / 12 sharpshooters
stinging / 11 eyebrows raising / 10 spines a-busting / 9 noggins knocking
/ 8 kicks a-kicking / 7 punches punching / 6 suplex smashing / 5 seconds
of the people chanting the Rock's name.... / 4 Rock Bottoms / 3 People's
Elbows / on your 2 Buck teeth / and an (beep) kicking all over New
Orleans...' IF YA SMELLLLLLLLALALALALALALOWWWW what the Rock is cookin'!"
I dunno, I liked Bob & Doug McKenzie's version better.
Catch the WWF LIVE! Tomorrow, RAW is Miami at a special TV taping! And
Saturday will see a special SmackDown! taping in Orlando!
UPN spot has the Big Show, on "My Favorite Holiday Gift:" "I'm a big huge
fan of peanut butter cups, and my mom got me, like, this giant bag of
peanut butter cups, there must have been like a hundred of 'em in there.
THAT was cool."
Oh man, the FAT ALBERT CHRISTMAS SPECIAL IS MONDAY
Did you know Chia is only in business during December? That's your L.M.
Boyd for the day
And now, the WWF Slam of the Week, presented by Xbox! From RAW, Rock
saves Rikishi - leading to Test getting Ye Olde Stinkface
RIKASHMONEY (with SmackDown! is brought to you by Crash Bandicoot: The
Wrath of Cortex, Lugz, Blockbuster, and the wwf.com "I Wanna Go!"
sweepstakes, featuring "The Fast and the Furious" - wow, so many ads) v.
LANCE STORM - Storm strikes - right, right, right, right, right, right,
'kishi shoves him off - Storm back up - right, right, right, 'kishi shoves
him again, clothesline, right, right, into the ropes is reversed,
shoulderblock by 'kishi. Storm rolls outside. 'kishi out after him -
head to the STEEL steps. Storm rolled back in - 'kishi slow getting in -
stomp by Storm, stomp, stomp, stomp, whip is reversed, back elbow by
'kishi - off the ropes - DRUMSTICK DROP! 1, 2, nope. Storm manages a
right hand up. Off the ropes, sunset flip ain't happening - but Storm
evades the heapin' helpin' of squash - off the ropes with a seated
dropkick. Storm drops the elbow. Storm going out and up - springboard
clothesline, nicely done. Leg is hooked - Rikishi out at 2. Storm going
up one more time - MISSILE DROPKICK - 1, 2, no. Storm takes issue with
referee "Blind" Teddy Long's cadence...but punishes US by going to a
headlock. That doesn't last long as Rikshi powers out - BIG Samoan Drop
off the ropes. Storm crawls to a corner, just in time for Rikishi to warm
it up - there's a big butt splash. Storm flumps, but before Rikishi can
take the expected course of action, THE NARCISSIteST walks out, completely
distracting the big man. Rikishi swings - but Test hops off the apron to
the floor with no contact. Storm up from behind with a kick to the back
of the leg, a superkick, and two feet on the ropes on the cover - 1, 2, 3.
Backstage, Kane gets a visit from Booker T - he asks for the 411 on First
Blood matches with Austin (NO WAY!) and then asks if he could maybe borrow
his.... Kane slaps away T's hand when it looks like he might be going for
the mask. "Hey hey hey, hey, ease up, ease up, big homey. You know I
just need you to hook me up with some advice, man, that's all." "Advice?
D-Von Dudley, from all of them at the World Wrestling Federation, wishes
us a....and then gets cut off for that "chimney sweepin' log" ad
"WWF Desire" Special Video Look at Triple H - he returns on the 7th, you
Take a look at the exterior of the Arena! It's...an arena!
KYLE TURLEY is in the crowd! Say, is he related to Edge?
If you don't believe Undertaker's a heel, perhaps this Special Video Look
will help you out
UP NEXT: Matt Hardy takes on Undertaker for the hardcore title!
Yikes, what a NOTHING segment. I mean, even more than normal!
RealSounds Arena ad #3
Commentators shill "Avalanche" - a movie in which John Tenta does NOT star
WWF HARDCORE CHAMPIONSHIP: AWESOMETAKER
v. MATT HARDY - Hardy barely waits for Taker's ride around the ring to end
before appearing and taking a kendo stick to Taker. STICK! STICK!
STICK! And so on. In the ring - oops, Taker got in a kick - it's over -
soupbone, back elbow, complaints to referee "Blind" Jack Down. Hardy
whipped into the opposite corner - but Hardy manges a clothesline with the
stick. STICK! STICK! STICK! STICK! STICK! You know, I think Taker's
getting tired of tasting the stick - he catches it, gives Hardy a knee in
the gut, whip into the ropes, swing - and a miss by Taker - clothesline by
Hardy! Off the ropes with a legdrop. Hardy dares him to get up - gutshot
- Twist of Fate attempt is shrugged off, and Taker powers him down with a
clothesline. Taker rolls out and removes his vest to show off his stick
welts. Hardy rolls out - apron run...but caught - and Taker puts him into
the ringpost. Stomp, stomp. Taker mouths off to the front row - then
puts Hardy hard into the barricade. Soupbone! Hardy tries a gutshot -
Taker with a big back elbow. Into the barricade again. Over to the
commentary table - head to the table - there goes the tabletop.
Soupbone! Taker runs Hardy across the table and into Cole's lap - so Cole
takes off. Taker grabs a chair and puts the edge into Hardy's sternum.
Another chair to the sternum. SmackDown! Replay shows Cole running like a
bitch. Head to the STEEL ring steps. Hardy with a gutshot - Taker with a
big kick. Hardy takes a trip to the timekeeper's table...the hard way.
Another chair in the gut. Taker makes Cole flinch in a MAJOR way - damn,
he's so awesome. "You WILL respect me!" Soupbone. Back onto the ring -
Taker with a running kick to the head from the floor - and an elbow to the
heart. Back in to taunt Doan - headbutt - headbutt. Headbutt. Taker is
methodical. "So's your mother!" Front row: "Oooooh!" Taker opens up
every orifice in Hardy's face for the benefit of the front row. Stomp.
Last Ride coming up - say good night, folks. Taker rams his forearm into
Matt's face for benefit - 1, 2, 3. (5:08) Taker decides to throw the
hardcore title and his vest back in the ring before driving
away...stopping at the top of the ramp not to raise his fist, but to look
back at Matt. He's off the bike and walking back to the ring! Doan
wastes no time running away as Taker stands over the fallen Hardy.
Through the ropes and outside. Taker again grabs Tony Chimel's chair -
and dares Matt to get up. "I want you to meet this chair, boy!" Chair
against the throat - and RAMMED TO the floor! Hardy clutches his larynx
as Taker reclaims his title belt. Replay is good 'n' graphic - from two
angles. If they can't get him booed NOW, they might as well give up.
(Hell, I like him either way, but that's just me.)
MOMENTS AGO! Taker tried to decapitate Matt Hardy - for real!
DURING THE BREAK! Hardy got the collar - and a free stretcher ride
Backstage, Hardy is about to be loaded into the ambulance...but not before
getting a visitor. "Hey, boy! On this trip to the hospital you're
getting ready to make, I want you to ask yourself one question......was
the (beep) really worth it?" OHHHHHHHHHHHH SNAP I wonder what Sara
thinks of this (no, I don't) off goes the ambulance...
JERICHO kicks off hour two (with TV-PG-DLV) - pausing to kiss each of
his title belts on his slow walk to the ring. "You know, I don't really
appreciate the response that all you people have been giving me lately.
I used to be your hero! I used to be your FAVOURITE. You used to CHEER
so LOUDLY, yet now you boo me. Why is that? Huh, why is that. I'll tell
you why - it's basic human nature. Because as humans, we have a tendency
to dislike those that are *better* than us. And quite honestly, I am
BETTER than all of you. And I am BETTER than all the rest. Don't you
people get it? Don't you realise that I am the very first and ONLY
Undisputed WWF Champion in history? Don't you realise how big of a deal
that is? Don't you realise how much respect is attached to such an
accomplishment? It means that I am BETTER educated than you...it means
that I have a BETTER standard of living than you do....and it's quite
obvious from looking around that I am BETTER looking than all of you
(especially that guy) but most importantly, I am an all-around BETTER
athlete and all-around BETTER champion than all of those who preceded me.
["Rock E!"] I am BETTER than the Rock! I am BETTER than Steve Austin!
And I am even BETTER than Ric Flair! And speaking of Ric Flair, speaking
of the co-owner of the World Wrestling Federation, let's check out what
happened during my championship title defense (successfully, I might add)
against Rob van Dam last Monday night on RAW - let's see it. [Let Us Take
You Back to RAW] You see? Absolutely despicable, I would like to thank
the courage of Mr. McMahon, who in the interest of fairness prevented Ric
Flair from SCREWING me out of my titles....and as far as ROB VAN DAM
goes..." But the music hits - don't tell me HE'S gonna get in HIS two
cents! Cole reminds us he's the Whole Dam Show. "WELLLL whoa whoa whoa
whoa who Well Rob van Dam, you had your chance, kid. You had your chance
to become the Undisputed champion (kisses belt), but you BLEW it, BABY.
You proved to me that you were exactly what I said you were, and that is
not worthy enough, and that is not good enough, to beat ME. I'm BETTER
than you, van Dam, but hey - you're always so COOL, I'm sure you're cool
with that, van Dam, I'm sure you're cool with the fact you didn't win on
Monday night, and I'm sure, hell, you're probably even cool right now,
isn't that right, R - V - D?" van Dam decides to just storm the ring
instead - clothesline ducked, elbow, elbow, elbow, leg sweep, mount,
right, right, right, right, Jericho rolls it over, right, right, van Dam
shoves him off - spinning heel kick puts him down - vaults to the top -
Fivestar frog splash! YAY! HE POINTS TO HIMSELF! I MUST PLAY HIS MUSIC!
Replay of the GRRRRR ANGRY FROG SPLASH
UP NEXT: The Rock vs. Test!
The 2002 Royal Rumble theme song is available on Kid Rock's new album,
"Cocky!" Go get Cocky NOW!
Let Us Take You Back to Last Week, when Edge broke William Regal's nose
Let Us Take You Back to Earlier This Week, when the WWF cameras caught up
to William Regal at his home, where he cut this old skool promo: "I've
spent several hours on an operating table, having my nose reconstructed.
And now, I sit here and it feels like somebody's smashing me in the face
constantly with a hammer - and why? Because of you, Edge - because of you
and last Thursday's actions at SmackDown! when you completely smashed in
my nose...I have got to sit here, be miserable and unhappy all over the
holidays, but I don't want you to think about that, Edge, for one second.
I don't want you to consider the fact that the next time I get my hands on
you, of the pain, of the suffering, and the misery that I'm going to put
you through. I wouldn't want you to even, just for a slight second, worry
about the fact that when I step into the ring with you the next time...you
are going to be turned into a bloody vegetable! And I will become the new
intercontinental champion. But I have to admire you, Edge, d'you know
why? Because you did something that I would have done if I had the
opportunity; you took a gamble, as us British say, 'who dares wins,' and
your gamble paid off! D'you know, my father used to always say to me,
'when you gamble with the devil...' - and believe me, Edge you have
gambled with the devil this time - '...the devil always wins.'"
THE NARCISSIteST v. THE
ROCK - This'll be "there" for sure - Rock ducks a clothesline, right,
right, right, right, into the ropes is reversed, knee in the gut by Test
FLIPS Rock! Test to a knee - right, right, right, right, intimidating
referee "Blind" Tim White. In the corner, right, back elbow, right, back
elbow, right, right, right, foot on the throat, breaking at 4 and staring
down White again. Into the opposite corner, clothesline by Test. Wow, I
didn't expect much of ANYTHING from Test. Into the opposite corner, Rock
squirts out of the clothesline attempt, right, right, right, but Test
fires back with a clothesline....for 1. Test picks up Rock - vertical
suplex coming up - nicely done if slow - 1, kickout at 2. Rock breaks up
the next attempt - right, right, into the corner is reversed, but Rock
gets the elbow up. THEN Rock runs into a whirlybird slam. Test FINALLY
smiles - probably not for the reasons the Rock wanted - right hand to the
small of the back - another look back at White. Shot in the back -
bearhug as Rock comes off the ropes. Test has picked his body part -
believe it or not. Crowd chants "Rock E" but he's fading fast. White
checks the arm - no movement. Arm falls once. Arm falls twice. I have a
*sneaky* suspicion the arm will not fall thrice. Sure enough, Rock starts
to suck it up and fight back - right hand, right breaks it up, right,
right, right, Test tries but it's blocked, Rock right, right, right,
right, whip is reversed but Rock is off with the flying clothesline!
Test into the ropes - belly-to-belly throw - leg is hooked, 1, 2, Test
kicks out! Into the corner, but Test gets the elbow up - feet on the
ropes - 1, 2, Rock JUST kicks out! Test takes umbrage at White not
getting to three - there's a fake punch and White does a SERIOUS flinch.
Meanwhile, Rock nips up - gutshot, DDT! Leg is hooked - 1, 2, kickout!
Rock back to the punchin' - right hand, into the ropes is reversed, head
down so Rock kicks him. Test runs at him - Rock steps aside and helps him
over the top to the floor! Rock outside after him - but Test lands the
knee - into the STEEL steps - rolled back in - and Test grabs a chair.
White gives him the business....but behind his back, LANCE STORM is out
and takes Rock out with a superkick! Test back in - hooks the leg - 1, 2,
NO!! Test is *livid*. "You count to three!" There's a shove on White.
Rock up from behind as White shoves back (!) but instead of Test falling
into the predictable schoolboy, it's Rock hooking Test's arm as he rares
back to take a swing at the zebra - spun around, right, right, right, into
the ropes, but pulled back by Test - knee in the gut, Meltdown attempt -
Rock slides down the back, shoves Test into the ropes - spinebuster! Rock
brings in Storm the hard way, as he's suddenly appeared on the apron again
- right, right, right, NOW KISS THAT - no, Rock steps aside as the
Wotsitolla Boot comes into the picture - hitting STORM instead! Test
walks into ROCK BOTTOM - 1, 2, 3! (5:53) That was about a MILLION times
more entertaining than I thought it would be. Give it up for the Rock!
Replay of Rock looking back, seeing Test coming, moving aside, and ROCK
WWF Shop Zone Dot Com ad
TONIGHT: 1st Blood Match Stone Cold Steve
Austin vs. Booker T! Don't you dare forget it!
Your hosts are a pair of kings - MICHAEL KING COLE & JERRY LAWLER.
LAST MONDAY: Go read the RAW report to learn how things escalated between
Austin and Booker - *with HILARIOUS results*
Q: Why is Flair laughing at a TV that isn't even on? A: Senile Jericho
barges in asking if he thinks his little plan with Rob van Dam was so
funny. Jericho tells Flair he's jealous and envious of his Undisputed
Championship. "Wanna touch it? You can't!" Flair denies trying to screw
with Jericho - but maybe he WILL screw with him - how about a championship
defense? How about The Big Show? How about NEXT? Jericho makes the
Please, no more BOD ads.
CERTAINLY not twice in the same break!
When he's not being better than us, Chris Jericho also moonlights at THQ -
as this ad for "SmackDown! Just Bring It" clearly shows
And now, the Lugz Boot of the Week! From RAW, Tajiri puts two boots in
Torrie's face - and ends up on the losing end of his match.
Commentators hype Heat - Christian takes on Rob van Dam with the European
title on the line! How can Christian manage to keep his title facing the
man who never jobs? Tune in Sunday! (also, Torrie Wilson will be around)
UNDISPUTED CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH: MR.
JERICHO (with EARLIER TONIGHT!) v. WELL IT'S THE BIG SHOW - Champ
enters first because Flair is SCREWING WITH HIM - Jericho, with no time to
prepare, still wears his funny pants out to the ring. WILL BIG SHOW
FINALLY REGAIN HIS RIGHTFUL PLACE AS THE STANDARDBEARER AND FLAGSHIP OF
THE WORLD WRESTLING FEDERATION? (Probably not, no.) Hey, remember when
Giant was protecting Jericho as part of an NWO joke? Me either. Show
goes for Jericho, but he hotfoots it out of the way - then shuffles to
show he is flighty! Show goes for him again - again Jericho sneaks out of
the way. Chop! I think he made him made. Jericho heads out of the ring,
then runs when Show follows him - back in - Show on the apron - forearm,
forearm, forearm, no dice - well it's the big forearm and Jericho goes
down. Show Diesels over the top rope - well it's the big forearm in the
back. Well it's the big scoop - and slam. Well it's the big scoop - well
it's the big backbreaker. Well it's the big slap in the corner. And one
more. The Best of 2001 voting ends at MIDNIGHT! Into the ropes, Jericho
hangs on and makes an escape. Show is back out after him. Well it's the
big forearm in the back. Well it's the big press - and dropped throat
first on the barricade! Well it's the big shove into the STEEL steps
(after the commentators get set to run away). Well it's a big slap.
Referee "Blind" Brian Webber is only up to five - Show presses Jericho
over the top rope from the floor, and back in the ring. Show's back in -
and keeping Jericho from escaping - so Jericho goes for the eyepoke.
Forearm to the face, forearm, Show absorbs it all and clotheslines him
down. "What are you thinking, little man?" Well it's the big knee.
Show winds up - running avalanche - MISSES! Jericho quickly climbs to the
top - missile dropkick! 1, 2, kicked out with authority. Jericho for a
forearm to the back of the head, another, another, running knee to the
head, field goal kick...still Show can shove him off - Jericho with
another running kick - right, right, right, Show shoves him off, well it's
the big clothesline, well it's the big clotehsline, into the ropes,
presses Jericho up - and lets him drop. Show makes it look SO EASY.
Jericho manhandled into the corner...but Jericho gets two boots up to stop
the charge. Crossbody - CAUGHT. THE FINAL CUT!!!!!!!! 1, 2, FOOT ON THE
ROPES!!!!!!!! Show is PISSED OFF. Well it's the big headbutt. Whip out,
reversed back into the original corner, clothesline. International sign
of the chokeslam! Jericho is in the choke - but kicks the knee, kick,
kick, and takes Show to one knee, releasing the choke. Jericho runs in -
but AGAIN finds himself in the choke. Desperate, Jericho shoves Webber
away, then kicks Show in the...little show to get him to let go. Jericho
grabs the WWF Championship belt and CLOCKS Show with it - Jericho covers -
1, 2, 3. ABSOLUTELY.... PERFECT. (5:29)
UP NEXT: 1st Blood Match - Steve Austin v.
"Best of the WWF 2001 Viewers Choice" airs New Year's Eve! the NEW tnn!
BOOKER T (with Final Fantasy X presents the Royal Rumble!) v. STONE
COLD STEVE AUSTIN in a First Blood match - T grabs a chair on his way
to the ring - he's no dummy and he knows there's no disqualification in
this match - and no better way to make a man bleed than by conkin' his
noodle with a chair. Hey you know we haven't seen Austin tonight until
now. Austin decides to grab a chair of his own, throwing it into the ring
- make that two chairs - Austin rings the bell and throws IT into the ring
- and there's one more chair (complete with timekeeper Mark Yeaton's
jacket!) tossed in. Austin grabs his first chair - T won't let him in -
SWING and a miss - Austin tries to get in again - SWING and a miss - so
Austin ankles him and pulls him out - right, right, right, right, head to
the commentary table, up and over - see ya, Vole - right by Austin, right,
right, right, lariat puts him back on the floor. No blood yet. Kick to
the head. Into the ringpost - didn't open him up. Mount on the floor,
right, right, right, right, rolled into the ring - T manages a shot to the
back as Austin comes in - and one more. Stomp by T. Austin into the
ropes, reversal spot is flubbed but they keep rolling - KICK - T into the
ropes, Austin press! Austin with seven or eight rights - Fuck You elbow
off the ropes - and Austin goes to the turnbuckle, undoing the pad
covering that STEEL eyebolt! Another clothesline for T. Austin muscles
him over with the snap suplex. Austin stands on his head and uses the
ropes for leverage. Stomp. T put into the ropes, reversed, knee in the
gut puts Austin DOWN. T quickly clamps on the headlock - which to my
knowledge won't make Austin bleed. Austin manages a takeover to counter.
Lariat. Kneebrace across the face - but didn't open him up. The
turnbuckle pad is off! T manages to duck - and connect with a Harlem
sidekick. T again goes to the headlock. Lawler tries in vain to explain
it - E for effort. Austin punches out - off the ropes, ducks a
clothesline from T, but not the flying jalapeno. T moves in - stomp,
stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp. T helps Austin up - straight right
hand, right, to the exposed turnbuckle - but Austin blocks! Blocks again!
Austin right, right, right, T puts a thumb in Austin's eyes. Whip is
reversed...and T is sent over the top to the floor. Austin rolls out
again - T's head meets the STEEL steps - and a second time. Again, T's
head meets the STEEL steps. Rolled back in - Austin grabs an extension
cord and puts on a super choke. With his last bit of strength, T manages
to grab a chair and swing back, cracking Austin in the head. That one
DIDN'T open him up, but T is back in control. Right, right, block, Austin
right, right, right, right, T catches the next one, steps under and lands
a heel kick. T mounts him - right, right, right, right right right right
and maybe a few more. Into the ropes, T wants the gutshot but Austin
shoots into a double leg takedown instead - and HE rabbit punches him.
Up we go - into the ropes, Austin with a sleeper - T turns in, shoves
Austin into the ropes and HE clamps on a sleeper. Austin backs T into the
corner (exposed turnbuckle!) but T manages to hang on - THEN rams the back
of Austin's head into the STEEL! That may have knocked Austin out.
Stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp. Austin tries to pull himself
up...T with a right. Head to the buckle - BLOCKED! T manages a gutshot
instead, whipped out, whipped back to the corner, Austin hits back first -
T in, but Austin hits him with SNAKE EYES ON THE BOLT!! T is a walking
zombie. KICK WHAM T shoves Austin into Hebner, knocking him out (ohhhh) -
T with an elbow in the back - whip is reversed, Austin hits a spinebuster.
No blood yet. Austin grabs a chair - THIS might do it. ARE YOU SHITTING
ME IT'S THE BIG BOSS MAN and HE's got a chair in hand - WHACK! and down
goes Austin. HE OPENED HIM UP, KING! T adds an axe kick...and looks at
his hand. It could be - it is - the most electrifying move in sports
entertainment! T breakdances back up - kick in the gut, kick, kick, kick,
kick - Hebner is STILL out - T tries to help him up - Austin comes over -
T stays in control, though - gutshot, right, right, kick, kick, T swings
the chair - but MISSES - Austin comes firing back! Right, right, left,
right, left right, kick, kick, kick, stomp stomp stomp stomp stomp stomp
stomp - into the ropes, KICK WHAM STUNNER! Austin grabs a chair - he's
poised - but ohhhh Hebner is up and he actually sees the blood on Austin's
head. That's it. Your winner is Booker T. (9:53) T hightails it...with
Austin in close pursuit - until stopping to look up at the video screens.
It's Vince. "Hahahahahahaha - hahahahahahahahaha - hahahahahahahahaha -
hahahahaha" and so on. Credits are up and WE OUT