by Christopher Robin Zimmerman
WrestleLine/WrestleManiacs
MAD PROPS: And a special shout out to Ron and Fez, for devoting another
hour of coast to coast radio time to WRESTLING TALK - towards the end, I
was *really* fighting off a violent coughing fit but we made it through. I
got to mention Steve Blackman twice AND put over the "party time"
catchphrase, so it was productive for me as well. Thanks to several of you
who have already signed in to tell me you caught the show!
Before we get to the show, here's the latest: The AOL/Time Warner merger
may close as soon as the close of business the 13th. Coincidentally, the
Australian tour ends the 14th - which, thanks to timezones, is still the
13th here in America. If they want WCW off the books, something may HAVE
to go down by Friday. Add to all this the fact that that last show on the
14th is a Thunder taping, so next week's TV would be in the can. Add to
all this the fact that there's NO show of *any* kind scheduled the week of
the 16th - PLENTY of time to effect MAJOR change. Get my drift? By the
time you read this, something interesting may have *already* gone
down...or, it's about to. Hell, ECW got the boot - can we cross off three
in the same week?
Can I just point out ONE MORE TIME that one of Russo's absolute favourite
stories is about the night RAW was on three continents? The ratings were
SO bad that McMahon immediately told the entire world that Vince Russo was
the guy to make the WWF #1, by God! Second hour ratings from Nitro, last
Monday... from Another Continent: 1.9 / 1.9 / 1.9 / 1.9. (Thanks, Torch!)
Is that irony? Whatever it is, it's pretty sweet...to THIS wrestling fan.
We may NEVER look at Friday the 13th the same way again!
The following program is a CRZ SuperStation original report
WCW logo - TV-PG-DLV - tick, tick, tick
Steiner, Midajah and Jarrett are WALKING! Spying Stasiak, Steiner loses
composure and chokes him until he rats out Sanders as the man in charge
tonight. Steiner asks him to please convey his wishes for a tussle with
Booker T on this very show
Here's a few exteriors of Sydney - thank God, I'd almost forgotten what the
opera house looked like since the Olympics ended - whoa! A big closed
captioned symbol in THIS town, too!
Opening Credits
If I hear someone say "Thunder down under" ONE MORE TIME I'm gonna blow
something up, I swear-- HEY! PYRO! Coming to you via extreme tape delay
from the Entertainment Center in Sydney, New South Wales, Australia
11.10.2K (taped 9.10) on Atlanta's Superstation WTBS, THIS is THUNDER!
FRANCHISE (with Torrie Samuda) and LANCE STORM (with Major Gunns) v.
GENERAL RECTION and KONNAN (with Tygryss) - "Cut the damn music! Hey
Konnan, I'm gonna talk real slow and simple so you and all these low-IQ
American wannabe Aussies can understand! The way I hear it backstage,
Konnan, you and that pink dog bitch of yours tygress are looking for a
piece of twisted steel and sex appeal. Well, brother, if it's a death wish
you've got, then I'm the man, the pusher that's got your fix. Hey Konnan,
you take that calendar and you mark down Halloween Havoc, 'cause you've
just booked a date to get your ass Franchised." "First of all, you people,
let's make one thing clear: *I* come from America...and unlike you
Australians, I am a civilised woman, and I deserve a lot better than this
hellhole of a country. All week long..." The music interrupts her as Storm
and Gunns come out to a moderate face pop. Too bad these guys were booked
to be partners, I guess. "If I can be serious for a minute, this country
was basically founded by convicts and con men...so I'm not expecting much
outta ya - prove me wrong and show some respect for the Canadian national
anthem." Crowd completes a 180 and boos Storm. First man to talk over the
anthem was Schiavone - SHAME! Shocklingly (NO!), the anthem is interrupted
(:13) by "Not Edwin K. Starr" as Rection comes out - and wisely waits for
his partner to come out before they hit the ring...and clear it. Big stall
job by the heels. Konnan with a slap for Franchise...so Storm tags him in.
Lockup, to the ropes, to the corner, Konnan ducks, right, Franchise right,
they trade blows, they trade chops, Franchise into the ropes, leapfrog by
Konnan, blind tag by Storm, back kick by Konnan sliding around but eating a
flying shoulder off the top from Storm. Head to the buckle, right, knee,
knee, Franchise holds him - then choking him while referee "Blind" Mickie
Jay's back is turned. Tag to Franchise. Into the ropes, gutshot, off the
ropes with a kneelift. Tag to Storm. Kick, whip into the corner, follow
clothesline. "Canada sux" chant. Tag to Franchise, open kick, snapmare,
off the ropes with a dropkick. Side headlock, tag, holding him for the
kicks while Jay deals with Rection. Off the ropes, dropkick - 1, 2,
Rection comes in and Storm lets up. Konnan tries to punch out, but Storm
stays on him. Whip into the corner is reversed, but Storm gets the boot up
- trying to come off the ropes but Gunns holds Storm's ankle (!) - double
clothesline and both men are down. Now Torrie and Gunns are going at it -
now Tygress is over to give Torrie HER opinion. Meanwhile, something's in
the ring - didn't see it but Rection is in and he's a HOUSE ON FIRE -
double noggin knocker - Franchise thrown out to Konnan - big powerslam for
Storm in the ring. Rection ready to go up - Savage elbow, but there's no
ref in the ring as Jay has wisely decided to separate the three women...or
die trying, anyway. Franchise in and snapping back the neck to halt the
pin attempt. Big DDT by Franchise. Here's KIDMAN with a run-in, Tomokaze
on Franchise, rendering him unconscious for No Laughing Matter - Jay back
in to count THIS pinfall - 1, 2, 3. (4:22) Tony asks us to please
come back, because after the break Cat is going to make a big announcement
about new talent! WOW! "One of the biggest in a long time!" DOUBLE WOW!
Commissioner Foley sings to his plush dog - I mean, Sanders sings to a
plush koala. Stasiak comes in and says that that iWatch logo wants Booker
T. Sanders says he's got Steiner lined up for a world title match at
Halloween Havoc, but tonight T's got a nontitle "warmup" bout scheduled.
Stasiak refuses to be the bearer of news for Steiner.
WCW Magazine ad
Here comes CAT (with Mz. Jonez). "Okay, people, listen up, I got a huge
announcement. But right now, before I get to it, I wanna apologise to this
guy. You know I thought this guy right here was a fake - I thought this
guy right here was not the true and not the real deal, but I tell you what,
right now, after checking this guy out, this guy's a legitimate karate
champion. This guy right here is not only bad, this guy right here'll kick
the ass all over the place. So right now, I want to introduce to all you
people out there the newest WCW superstar, SAM GRECO!" "Well, before I
start, ah, the formalities, I need a warmup. And you guys have to help it
in here. And I'm gonna start by saying AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE" Crowd:
"AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE" "Thank you. Thank you Sydney, thank you Australia.
AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE" "That's the spirit - gold medal spirit! Well done.
Okay, first of all I know there's a lot of people in Australia that have
heard of me, but unfortunately in America, there's not. So, I've been
fighting on the international circuit of kickboxing for many years, and
I've been given the opportunity to sign with the WCW, and I've grabbed the
bull by the horns and I've signed that contract knowing - KNOWING - I will
face the biggest and baddest athletes around the world. But upon saying
that, I consider that a challenge. So, if I must say, Cat, I'd like to
thank you and your company for giving me this opportunity - and my country
and fellow men here in Australia, I hope you support me around the world.
And I'll do my part by defending the Australian name. Thank you." Stevie
Ray SAVAGED him the whole time, by the way. And now it's time to see the
NATURYL BORN THRYLLYRZ and hear from Mike Sanders. "Ernest, who in the
hell gave you the authority to hire anybody in this company?" "Hey Mike, I
hired your mom last night for a coupla hours and SHE didn't complain!"
"Look, I'm not even gonna go there, let me refresh your memory 'cause I
know you're a little old. Vince Russo--" "Just like that suit you got on,
OLD." "Vince Russo gave me the pen, the power and all the pull." "I tell
you what, Mike, the only pulling you was doin' (was last night [and Cat's
lips go out of camera range here]). But I'll tell you what, I'ma show you
the pull you have. I'ma book yo ass tonight in a match against...uh...ol'
fatass Mark Madden over here." "Well, Cat, that ain't no problem, I can
beat all three of those guys - but since we're talking about puttin' people
in matches, I would suggest you take that vanilla ice cream head o' yours,
stick 'em between those two pencils you call legs because your ass is going
to get powerbombed straight down under. You, my friend, will be in a match
with Coach Kevin Nash when he arrives." "Well, well Mike, since I have
more power, okay? I'ma change that match I put you in - I'ma book you
tonight umm.... against Showtime." "Who the hell is Showtime?" "It's not
HBO, bitch, we talking about Sting! Come on down here..." All six of them
make their way down the aisle. Stasiak is sent in - Greco puts him down
with a crescent kick. Sanders says we'll handle this when Big Sexy Kevin
Nash gets here. Now play his James Brown music!
WOW! Goldberg is lacing up!
The Valvoline Max Life replay is Greco putting him down with a
crescent kick - and Cat doing the splits.
In the office, Sanders tells the rest of the Thrillers that they're not
gonna let the Greco situation throw them. He sends Jindrak & O'Haire out
to take care of Thriller business. Palumbo and Johnny make fun of Stasiak.
WCW Magazine ad #2 - you may want to wait until next week to subscribe, you
know...just to see if they're still around.
WCW WORLD TAG TEAM TITLES: LT. LOCO & CPL. CAJUN (already in the ring) v.
THE iWATCH LOGO (with Mark Jindrak & Sean O'Haire) - lockup, side headlock
by Loco, Jindrak pikcing him up but Loco holding on - powering out, knee in
the back by O'Haire, providing the distraction - across the back - and
dropped on his face. Cajun comes in, distracting referee "Blind" Billy
Silverman and allowing O'Haire to come in for the doubleteam. Jindrak
monkey flip into O'Haire clotheline. O'Haire stays in - right, right,
block, Loco with a right, block, right, chop, into the opposite corner,
shoulderblock by O'Haire - Logo ducks - second rope crossbody for 2. Tag
to Cajun. Right, right for Jindrak, right for O'Haire, right, tag, into
the ropes, drop toehold by Cajun, dropkick by Loco. Head to the buckle,
tag to Cajun. Into the ropes is reversed, crossbody attempt is
caught...Loco in with a dropkick - Cajun gets 2. Elbow by Cajun. Got him
up for the sidewalk slam - punctuated by a clothesline by Loco. 2. Tag to
Loco - open shot. Right, into the ropes is reversed, Loco slides under,
O'Haire ducks a swing, waistlock, Loco elbows out, O'Haire with a
jawbreaker. Loco staggers into a right from Jindrak. Tag. Kick, kick,
kick, ten storey beal from the doubleteam. Jindrak calls Loco a "disgrace
down under." Big shot. Into the ropes, duck, but Loco doesn't duck THIS
clothesline. Jindrak with a few workds for the receptive crowd. Into the
ropes, Loco floatsover and drops him with a face jam. Tag to O'haire - HOT
TAG to Cajun! Cajun's a HOT AND SPICY - DDY for O'Haire, but Jindrak hits
a tilt-a-whirl slam. Loco perches on top - missile dropkick for O'Haire!
He kicks out at 1 while Jindrak tosses Loco over the top rope. Positioned
on top - Jindrak springs to the top rope with no hands and hits a
Frankensteiner, taking over Cajun. O'Haire in position for the
Seantonbomb, but Loco manages to crotch him before he can go airborne - and
he falls to the floor. Cajun dropkick puts O'Haire's head to the
turnbuckle - Loco with a frog splash (!) - 1, 2, O'Haire makes the save!
Was either man legal? Who cares! O'Haire tosses Loco out - doubleteam
into the ropes, Cajun ducks, Loco pulls O'Haire outside by tripping him up
while Cajun manages a standing 'rana on Jindrak - 1, 2, 3!!!! Ladies and
gentlemen, we have new tag team champions. (5:30) Or do we? "ABOVE
AVERAGE" MIKE SANDERS is out. "Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to introduce
to you the new world tag team champions! Guys, the bad news is, the former
champs get the first rematch, so I'd like to start that right about now."
LT. LOCO & CPL. CAJUN (already in the ring) v. MARK JINDRAK & SEAN O'HAIRE
(already in the ring) for the tag team championship - double surprise
schoolboy, 1, 2, double kickout. Whew! How lame would THAT have been!
Double boots - Loco out, Cajun into the ropes, boosted into an O'Haire
powerslam (sorta). Crowd chanting "Bullshit" and getting muted for it. 1,
2, Loco saves despite the fact that Cajun is under the bottom rope. Loco
tossed again. Cajun into the ropes, double leapfrog, but Cajun holds on.
Loco with a clothesline on Jindrak, O'Haire with a superkick on Loco, Cajun
off the top turnbuckle with a crossbody on O'Haire for 2. This is a MESS.
Springboard legdrop to the back of the head by Loco. But Jinrak mauls him
down. Doubleteam on Cajun - Cajun counters with a semi-sunset flip that
works in slow motion - O'Haire saves at 2. Right for Cajun, Loco over to
trade punches with O'Haire. Cajun puts Jindrak in the ropes - oh oh,
O'Haire is going for a title belt...Cajun trying another sunset flip but
O'Haire is over to pull Jindrak's arm. All five men stand frozen for
several awkward seconds until Loco comes in to strike O'Haire, allowing
Cajun to complete the sunset flip - 1, 2, kickokut. Gutshot by Cajun,
going for the rana again but NOW O'Haire waffles him with the belt.
Jindrak covers - 1, 2, Loco makes the save! O'Haire kicks Loco out of the
ring. O'Haire with a Seantonbomb - NOW it's over. 1, 2, 3. Ladies and
gentlemen, we have new tag team champions. (2:22) For even MORE fun, SGT.
A-WALL comes out at this point, clocks Jindrak, chokeslams O'Haire, and
chokeslams Jindrak. Play their music 'cause they DON'T have the belts!
PAMELA PAULSHOCK stands with Elix Skipper. He says "my house" a few
hundred times and challenges Kidman to a match
NEXT: Booker T is WALKING!
Sanders sends Jindark, O'Haire and the iWatch logo to the trainers -
then turns to Palumbo and tells him he's got a great assignment for him
tonight - he'll end Goldberg's streak tonight! Palumbo is taken aback.
BOOKA T. (with Halloween Havoc: 18 Days Away Graphic) v. ? - "First things
first - wassup Sydney Australia! You know I have a little message for Big
Poppa Pump Scott Steiner. You know, Steiner, you can run around the back
screaming and crying all you want, but until you meet Booker T at Halloween
Havoc, that don't mean nothing. Ya whacked me witch your little pipe, but
lemme tellya, Booker T just keeps on gettin' up. So I'm gonna say this to
you, Scott Steiner. All the way from down under in Sydney, and I'm gonna
say it real slow: when it's all over with, don't hate the playa, hate the
game. And as far as you go, Mike Sanders, tonight you can send any one of
them playa hataz in the back that you want, because I'm gonna take 'em out
right here in the middle of this ring." I'll bet you've already figured
out by now that KRONI>| are the opponents. Shockingly, the two take over
on the one and quickly we're outside. T tries to come back but he's one.
Crowd chants for Goldberg...I think. Referee "Blind" Charles Robinson gets
to eight before T is back in - full nelson into a uranage by Adams - 1, 2,
kickout! Into the corner, T ducks the charge by Adams, Clark collides with
Robinson (oh no), gutshot and axe kick for Adams, breakdancing up but into
a Clark clothesline. Into the ropes, double shoulderblock. The music hits
and COLD BEER comes out through the crowd - spear for Clark. Adams pounds
away - full nelson...but Goldberg powers out of it! Bak elbow for Adams -
ducking a clothesline from Goldberg but ending up in position for the Book
End! But Adams isn't a seller, you know, so he hiptosses T out of it
instead. Standing side kick from Goldberg, Harlem side kick from T.
Robinson, having come to, rings the bell and pronounces Kronik the winners.
(relaxed DQ 3:15) Sign in crowd: WHERE'S JUVI? I think that's a picture
from the newspaper right under it.
Backstage, Chuck Palumbo is CALLING HIS MOMMA and looking for words of
wisdom...trying to get out of his match with Goldberg, I think. Wow, that
must be some cel phone to get all the way to America with NO lagtime!
Halloween Havoc ad
Johnny "the Bull" catches up to Kevin Nash and the iWatch logo. Nash says
there's no such thing as problems...only situations. Then he walks off.
KIDMAN v. "PRIMETIME" ELIX SKIPPER (with Hacksaw Jim Duggan) - Have I
mentioned tonight that Skipper's new music SUCKS? Duggan hooooooos it up
for the crowd. Lockup, knee by Skipper, clubbing forearm, another, into
the ropes, Kidman ducks, waistlock, Skipper elbows out, off the ropes,
Kidman dropkicks him. Head to the buckle. Into the ropes, Kidman up on
the shoudlers, head scissors takeover, clotheslien puts Skipper on the
outside. Kidman with a springboard plancha on Skipper and Duggan!
Back in the ring, elbow, elbow, into the ropes is reversed, head
down, kick by Kidman. Low bridge when he tries to crossbody block Skipper.
Ray says "it's his house" fifteen or twenty times. Very confusing!
Skipper up top - twisting plancha to the floor! Back in the ring, 1, 2,
kickout. Another cover gets 1. Ray says "his house" another ten times.
Off the ropes, Kidman slides through, right, right, right, into the ropes,
Skipper bridges under the clothesline attempt that didn't come, and Kidman
stomps him off the ropes. Into the corner, splash misses. "His house!"
Stomp, stomp, Skipper drops the elbow, does it again, stomp, "Canada sux,"
European uppercut, 1, 2, Kidman kicks out. Kidman with a right, right,
right, Skipper with a right. Skipper with a death suplex. "Hoooooooo!"
"It's HIS HOUSE!" Top rope elbow misses. Kidman with
"Iblockyourpunchyoudon'tblockmine," right, right, into the opposite corner,
big right hand. Tornado bulldog - 1, 2, NO! Duggan raspberries the
camera. To the corner, Skipper up and over - DRAGON SUPLEX only gets 2!
Kidman up and over - short powerbomb gets 2. Into the ropes, but Skipper
holds on - Kidman after him, but he ends up crotching himself on the top
rope. Skipper to the top turnbuckle, walking the ropes, and hitting the
Frankensteiner - 1, 2, NO! I bet that's what he was supposed to do on
Monday when he fell down and blew the spot instead. Kidman reverses the
suplex attempt with a rollup - 1, 2, no! Kidman has him in the death
suplex position, but drops him face first instead. Kidman going up
top...but Duggan's passing Skipper a chair. As referee "Blind" Billy
Silverman removes the chair, Duggan cracks Kidman with the 2x4, taking him
off the top turnbuckle. Skipper with the Play of the Week - 1, 2, 3. HIS
HOUSE! (5:55) Hey, what a bullshit way to ruin a pretty good match.
Paulshock catches up to Palumbo, who's nervously watching a monitor. She
asks if it was really his mom on the phone. Anything wrong with that?
Nah, she thinks it's cute. What'd she tell him? He whispers in her ear.
"She told you to run?!" Palumbo expresses unhappiness that she made his
plans public.
Mike Awesome is WALKING! He's gonna talk later!
The WCW Ringside Release is the TBS Original Movie "First Target." WOW!
Tony introduces a WCW Magazine ad, but they played it earlier, so instead
we go to
THAT 70'S MULLET sits in the Lava Lamp Lounge, does some Australian crowd
manipulation, then calls out KWEE-WEE & PAISLEY. For some reason, Awesome
keeps calling him "Kiwi" - oh well. He asks him about the Thrillers, then
ignores his answer and starts hitting on Paisley. Awesome gets angry, and
we wouldn't like him when he's angry. Awesome should recognise that line -
it's kinda seventies. JOHNNY "THE BULL" shows up and waffles Kwee-Wee from
behind. Before Awesome can enjoy it too much, the HARRYS BROTHYRZ take out
*Awesome* from behind. That's just a taste of what he'll be getting later
tonight! WOW!
Backstage, Goldberg is taping up! WOW!
AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE
Nash asks Sanders why the hell he's wrestling Sting. He says Cat booked
him in the match 'cause he's pissed that Sanders booked him against Nash.
Nash expresses surprise. "You KNEW I was goin' down there tonight!" "Down
where?" "Down there!" Yuk yuk yuk....Nash says he has an idea about that
match with Sting tonight...
Promotional consideration paid for by Slim Jim (no Savage), Tootsie
candies, Geico, and Geico (again).
"THE EVENT" CHUCK PALUMBO (with Perfectshawn Stasiak & the iWatch
logo) v. COLD BEER (entrance 1:29) - Hey, did you notice that that "WCW
Australia" logo does NOT have the WCW star logo in it anywhere? Goldberg's
pyro seems a little...impotent tonight. Palumbo with a knee, right, right,
right, into the opposite corner is reversed, but he gets the boot up - big
clothseline - NO-SELL! Right by Goldberg puts him down. Stasiak from
behind, Palumbo with a DDT. Palumbo decides to pose 'cause he's an idiot.
Going up top for the big flying shoudler tackle - no effect. Clubbing blow
for Palumbo. Stasiak in - Stasiak speared. Palumbo speared. Jackhammer
for Palumbo. 1, 2, 3 (1:21) Jackhammer for Stasiak - 1, 2, 3. (plus
0:14) Goldberg is "7-0." Woof, woof. BRING BACK JERRY FLYNN!!!! *HE*
knows how to lose to Goldberg!
Advance Auto Parts presents "This Week is WCW Motorsports!" Blaise
Alexander's 81 car sported the Ric Flair paintjob, but Flair couldn't be
bothered to show up, though, and you GOTTA respect that. Alexander tried
to blame a tire screwjob for his "Top 30" finish, but you and I know
better. Next week, Wally Dallenbach drives Talladega!
Moments Ago, Goldberg speared that guy, speared that guy, jackhammered that
guy for a fall, and roared. I *believe* these replays are taking longer
than the actual match.
Halloween Havoc ad
CAT (with Mz. Jonez & the iWatch logo) joins our commentators, who include
TONY SCHIAVONE & SAY FROOT BOOTY ALREADY. Cat insults the third man at the
table liberally, and Schiavone makes a big show out of yukking it up
because the camera's on him - lookit him slap Stevie Ray in laughter! He's
hear to watch Sanders get his ass kicked...
"ABOVE AVERAGE" MIKE SANDERS v. (THIS IS) JEDOUBLEF JADOUBLEREDOUBLET -
"Hey, that's not Sting!" Cat and the Mark get muted several times as they
try to talk about "nuts." Jarrett comes out in the same paintjob and
jacket we saw Monday to Metallica (not "Man Called Sting?") "Owwwwwww!"
Jarrett lies down. "It's....SHOWTIME! Come on Sanders - let's make this
quick. Everyone knows, everyone knows that I can't wrestle anymore, and
this is gonna be great practice for when the Chosen One Jeff Jarrett, the
man with all the stroke in WCW, beats the hell outta me at Halloween Havoc.
So come on. Wait wait wait wait - on second thought..." removes jacket.
"This is the best I've wrestled in years! It's the best I've felt - so
Sanders grab the ref, ring the bell, and cover me. 'cause you know I got
Daisy Fuentes on the phone, and I can't keep her waiting. Ring that bell."
As they ring the bell, the lights go out, the music hits again and (THIS
IS) STING comes out and demolishes Jarrett, but as he comes out of the
ring, Sanders pops him with the baseball bat. It's all Sanders. Stevie
Ray actually busts out the Japanese name of the cobra clutch, dizzying me
for the rest of this play-by-play. Sting makes his inevitable
comeback as Cat proclaims himself the Real Deal when it comes to being
commissioner - ha ha. (Scorpion Death Drop -> pin 2:52)
Close captioning where available made possible by Meineke!
Sanders asks where his guys were while he was getting his ass handed to
him. Nash says he'll make it up in his match with Cat.
Hey, look, there's some Australian guy! He apparently owns the network
that's responsible for airing five-week old episodes of Worldwide or
something.
HARRYS BROTHYRZ (with Let Us Take You Back to the Lava Lamp Lounge) v. THAT
70'S MULLET & CROWBAR (with the iWatch logo) - Pier Four Brawl quickly
spreads outside and hopefully allows me to totally blow off calling this.
You into the railing, you into the ring, you hard into the mat, you
dropkick through the ropes, then Crowbar pulls the low bridge so Awesome
can hit a no-hands tope into a double clothesline out on the floor. We
continue out on the floor. Finally, Big Ron and Crowbar do a bit in the
ring - there's a switch - and Crowbar goes down to the sidewalk slam. Tag
to Heavy D. Into the corner, followup clothesline puts Crowbar down. Tag
to Big Ron - double press and drop. Off the ropes - big fist. Gutshot,
gutwrench, almost dropped on his head (yikes) and he gets 2. Crowbar
reaching for the tag but Ron holding him back - Don with a shot for
Awesome, then back to Crowbar. Crowbar manages a jawbreaker, but runs into
a uranage for 2. Double big boot by the Harrisses. Into the ropes, duck,
quebrada (!) takes both men out. HOT TAG TO AWESOME! Clothesline!
Clothesline! Big boot! Clothesline! But Heavy D manages a clothesline of
his own. Double half crab (huh?) until Crowbar tries to break it up - they
each punch him outside. Ron stays in and lays the fists into Awesome.
Awesome manages a spinebuster (which is not a wheelbarrow suplex, but
thanks for playing) to turn it around. Crowbar sets up a table outside the
ring, then takes a boot from Heavy D. The Awesomebomb attempt is cut off
with a big boot. DDT by Big Ron. They move the table into the corner as
Ron sets him up...but he's distracted by Crowbar swinging a chair and
hitting Don (we miss it, of course). Ron with a superkick to the chair to
Crowbar - then running for Awesome - back body drop (sorta) into the table,
breaking it (sorta). Awesome covers for the pin. I shoulda TOTALLY blown
this off. Oh well. (5:59)
NEXT: Scott Steiner and Midajah are WALKING!
Promotional consideration paid for by Tootsie candies (again), the
WCW Nitro trading card game, "Toy Story 2" on video and DVD, and Tootsie
candies (again) (again)
WHITE THUNDER (with Midajah & the iWatch logo) v. RAYMOND STEREO (with
Tygryss) - "When Big Poppa Pump comes to town...all my hooches come around.
You see, back in the States I have freaks nationwide, but ever since I've
come to Australia, I find out I'm worldwide. Because ever since I've been
here, night after night, I've taken freaks to the mountaintop, and not only
have they found the Big O, not only have they found Nirvana, but the Big
Bad Booty Daddy gave them Sexual Sanctuary. So this goes to all my freaks
out there - Big Poppa Pump is your hookup. Holla if ya hear me!" Is he a
face now? How confusing! Steiner threatens to beat up a few fans, gets
muted, and FINALLY gets in the ring again. Lockup, big knee by Steiner.
Stomp. I sense a size disparity. Military press with a few reps before he
drops him to the canvas. Slid out of the ring to the floor. Steiner doing
pushups to a face pop. Steiner goes out after him, just in case he felt
like getting counted out. Whip into the barricade. Another look at a fan.
Back in the ring - Halloween Havoc 18 days away. Stomp, stomp, stomp,
standing on the neck, chop. Mysterio manages a kick in the groinal area,
but Steiner's got nothing there so it has no effect. Run into the
turnbuckle. Into the ropes, Mysterio ducks, does his spin in the ropes for
no reason, ducks another clothesline, dropkick, but runs into a
Steinerline. Kiss the bicep, drop the elbow. No no, he's not ready to
cover him yet. Stomp to the head. Double bicep for the fans. Kneelift to
the face. Into the ropes, over the ropes - but Mysterio skins the cat and
drops a leg on the head while he's doing pushups. Mysterio with a quebrada
attempt - but Steiner catches him. He gets muted here. Mysterio drops
down and shoves him into the corner, ducks a clothesline, springs off the
bottom rope, lands on the shoulders and hits a headscissors takeover. Body
scissors, face jam - Rey going up top, but he's caught, and thrown over in
a blockbuster suplex. Mysterio put on top - second rope Samoan drop!
Steiner Recliner here - submission there. (5:14)
NEXT: Kevin Nash is WALKING!
"ABOVE AVERAGE" MIKE SANDERS is out again with the iWatch logo. Looks like
he's joining the commentary team. If he says "cupcake," take a drink!
CAT (with Mz. Jonez) v. COACH KEVIN NASH - Sanders leaves the table to
distract Cat long enough for Nash to pop him. Elbow to the back of
the head. Knee in the corner, knee, knee, and amazingly, even though his
hair is back in a ponytail, he STILL has to stop to brush it back. Elbow,
brush hair back. Elbow. I think he told him not to ever touch Mike
Sanders again. Standing on the neck. Brush hair back. Nash wants a test
of strength. Cat looks around, looks at the hand - and kicks him. Kick,
kick, kick, off the ropes with a back kick. Leg is hooked - 2 count. Cat
with a breakin' elbowdrop - for 2. Kick, dancin' uppercut, cover, 2. Into
the ropes, reversed, big boot by Nash. Nash smooths out his eyebrows and
pulls down the straps - of course, Cat is recovering behind him...Sanders
is in behind HIM, and he's got a chair. WHACK. Referee "Blind" Charles
Robinson calls for the bell (relaxed DQ 2:27) - TWO disqualifications? I
bet Russo didn't write THIS show! Nash starts to express outrage, then
remembers he doesn't care. Sanders sets up the chair and suggests Nash
powerbomb Cat through it. Before *this* can happen, though, we begin the
cavalcade of run-ins and clustereffery - first BOOKA T., then WHITE
THUNDER, then (THIS IS) STING, then JEDOUBLEF JADOUBLEREDOUBLET, and
finally COLD BEER. Whoops, then KRONI>| - sorry, I thought that was it.
Halloween Havoc is 18 days away, by the way. Before we can see High Times
on Goldberg, however, credits are up and we're out. Weeeeeeak.
Christopher Robin Zimmerman
www.CRZ.net