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Ohio Valley Wrestling by DrewDeuce

5.1.2

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THE AUDIT
OVW for the week ended 01.05.2002

When last we met - "Ironman" Rob Conway lost a heated match to the Prototype and was getting beat down by all of Boland Services post-match when the rest of "Team OVW" ("Mr. Wrestling" Nick Dinsmore and the Damaga) came to make the save. During the save, the Damaga took a vicious chairshot from the Prototype and suffered a concussion. OVW owner Danny Davis promised that "The Machine" Doug Basham would never be able to enforce the clause in his contract allowing him to purchase _ of OVW for $25,000.

The Disciples of Syn (Damien & Pain) and Mark Jindrak and David =46lair (the "Dewce Horsemen") wrestled to a no-contest when Shelton Benjamin once again interfered in a Disciples match by beating everything in sight with a pool cue. Doug Basham crowned Victoria as the Queen of OVW, promised he would be part owner of OVW, and then retired to his royal chambers to do it with Victoria (huh huh). With the Damaga injured earlier, Dinsmore needed a tag partner against the Suicide Blondes (Derrick King & Jason Lee), so the Ironman pulled double-duty and helped Dinsmore win the Southern Tag Team Titles.

Mark Henry said he was taking a hiatus from wrasslin' to compete in the World's Strongest Man competition at the behest of Arnold Schwarzeneggar.

Leviathan retained his OVW championship belt in a match against Flash =46lanagan. Post-match, Trailer Park Trash came out and made up with Flash for all the blood they shed trying to get their shot at the title over the last few months. I cried.

Over the Holidays - The 12.22.01 outing was a clip show dealing with the Southern Tag Team title situation. It covered quite a bit of stuff from September thru Dinsmore and Conway winning them in mid-December.

The highlight of the show was another showing of the match at the RAW tapings in Louisville, which pitted the Minnesota Stretching Crew (Brock Lesnar & Shelton Benjamin) vs. the then Boland Services team of Rico Constantino and the Prototype. The 12.29.01 show covered appearances by WWF SuperStars making appearances in OVW. There was a good promo exchange between "Stone Cold" Steve Austin and Rico Constantino, a match with Flash Flanagan getting a surprising win over the now Undisputed Champion and Living Legend Chris Jericho, and an awesome match between Nick Dinsmore and Kanyon. I taped over that match accidentally and wish I hadn't. Kanyon threw everything in his arsenal against Dinsmore over the course of 7-8 mins, and couldn't get the win, so he tried to use his then US Title for a belt-shot, but fell victim to a schoolboy from Dinsmore. Great technical match. If Good 'Ol JR is as serious about the cruiserweights as he attempts to be in his Friday reports, Dinsmore will make a great prot=E9g=E9 for Dean Malenko.

My own opinion, of course.

My boss is coming in town, and I still have a bit of work to catch up on, so I might "burn thru this mutha" (=A9Hyatte) a bit more than usual, but that still won't stop the favourite section of OVW fans "everywhere" who have probably felt lost without:

Stuff Nobody Cares About: Nice Christmas, got most everything I wanted (Microsoft Return of Arcade [Dig Dug Rules!!!], Dogma Special Edition, Simpsons Season 1, John Carpenter's the Thing Spec. Ed., Snatch Spec. Ed., and Dragon's Lair), and had a nice time with family and friends.

Hopefully you did too. New Year's was a low-key affair at a friend's house. Made my patented "Yellow Russians" ("White Russian" sans the half and half, and insert egg nog . . . . mmmmm . . . egg nog), and I hit the flea market and brought home a stack of cheap comics. I just can't pass up 70's & 80's Marvel and DC's for $0.25 or less. The BCS sucks. I barely even watched most of the BCS games, but loved that Outback matchup between Ohio State and South Carolina, since I got back from the flea market to see the 4th Qtr, which was the most exciting part. My beloved Seahawks are still alive for the playoffs (until around 7:00 e.s.t., at least), and behind Marshall Faulk and Shawn Alexander (with some more help from Brett Favre and Mike Vanderjaagt), I won my fantasy league and will have a little money waiting for me when I return from Vega$ in a few weeks sans cash. Saw Lord of the Rings twice. Just incredible. Lucas and ILM have a lot to try and top with Episode II as far as special effects go. I was a big fan of the books, having read them twice, and just thought it was incredible. Can't wait for the Two Towers now. At least we've got Spider-Man and Ep II in May, eh? Oh andtheScorpionKingwhichIprobablywon'tseesinceI'veneverseeneitherMummymovieeither. I happened to be home Saturday night with the wife and we were watching LOTR pick up the first ever best movie of the year from the American Film Institute (AFI), and I must say that was the most wonderfully disorganized awards show I've ever seen, and I sat thru parts of the Wayans' hosting the MTV Video awards a few years back.

Directors introducing their own movies and either not being very good public speakers (David Lynch and Baz Luhrman) or having a ridiculously slow or far away teleprompter. I'll vote for the latter since Michelle Pfeiffer had to put on her glasses to read the thing too. Speaking of which, has Dianne Keaton ever been in a GOOD movie? I've been around a while and seen quite a few movies, but have yet to be enticed to see something she was in.

How's she still a celebrity? Moving on . . .

The bodies are most definitely hitting the floor and we are in the Davis "Arena" for the first OVW show of 2002. Your hosts are [Baby New Year Himself] Dean Hill and James E. Cornette. I will begin 2002 by putting Cornette's lightning quick nicknames for people in the blocked parentheses like I did with Dean Hill a sentence ago []. We immediately go to the ring for:

Pain (w/Syn and Connie Swayle) vs. [the Self-Appointed Vigilante of OVW] Shelton Benjamin. Pre-Match Pain expresses his disgust at Shelton Benjamin for the run-ins of the past few weeks in retaliation for Syn throwing a fireball in Brock Lesnar's face and forcing him to do jobs to WWF stars in arenas all across the country. Benjamin is a house of fire to start the match and kicks Pain down in the corner.

Throws him to the opposite corner for a Hardyz-type splash. Educated feet to the cranium of Pain, and goes to the apron to launch himself back on Pain. Pain takes that opportunity to regain control and knock Benjamin to the floor where they brawl. Hot shot into the post and Cornette says that if Pain has anything in that head, it's scrambled now. Back in the ring for more kicks by Benjamin. Spinning heel kick by Benjamin blocked by Pain, but Shelton maneuvers that into a bulldog. Walks the rope like a cat (like the Undertaker, but without holding onto an opponent to balance himself) and splashes Pain. Second cat walk, but Syn pulls the rope from the outside to Pain can take over.

Lateral press and a two count but Benjamin kicks out. Pain positions Benjamin for a SuperPlex, but Benjamin reverses into a powerbomb, but can't get a pin attempt because he's spent. Both men recover and trade fisticuffs. Pain slung into the ropes and Benjamin shoulderblocks, then superkicks Pain. Belton then leaves the ring to introduce a chair into the match so he can Pillmanize Pain's leg. Ref calls for the DQ, as Pain's tag-team partner Damien makes the save. Double beat-down on Benjamin until a large man in a red bandanna identified by Cornette as the "Red Dog" from Texas, makes the save. Heels are cleared from the ring and Benjamin and Red Dog give the face hug.

Winner: Pain via DQ (chair) at 5:52

When we return Shelton Benjamin and the Red Dog have joined Cornette and Hill at the announce position. Benjamin breathlessly explains (he was just in a match, you know) how he got the Dog to watch the back of the man who moves like a cat. Dog gets on the mike and says "every dog needs a bone to chew on, and I think I just found some WOOOF." Cornette speculates that we'll be seeing more of these men together in the future.

Interview - OVW Southern Tag Team Champions Nick Dinsmore and Rob Conway. Mr. Wrestling is appreciative of the Ironman being able to step in on a moments notice to replace the Damaga and help him win the belts.

Ironman says the Damaga is probably disappointed he couldn't have been a part of it, but as an original OVW member like them, he had to be happy for them. We're about to find out as the Damaga comes out and says he's not in a good mood. He does congratulate Conway on stealing his half of the tag team belts and Dinsmore on being able to cash those WWF paychecks and spend their money while his money is a little light as of late. He compares Dinsmore's personality to sleep aids and says Conway is so full of himself that he has a lifesize cardboard cutout of himself next to his bed. Cornette tries to make peace and says that the holidays are stressful for everyone and that the Damaga should just calm down. Damaga says he's bigger than them, probably a little bit stronger, and he's not going to kiss the ass of anyone in the front office of the WWF to get respect. He wishes them luck with the titles, but as far as "Team OVW" goes, "he's gone, he's outta here, see ya later."

OVW Southern Tag Team Championship: [Lords of the Ring] "Ironman" Rob Conway and "Mr. Wrestling" Nick Dinsmore (already in the ring) vs. Sean O'Haire and Mr. Black of Boland Services (w/"King" Kenny Boland, Jerome Crony and the Prototype). O'Haire and Dinsmore start out and lock up. As Dinsmore is put to the ropes, he reaches out and tags Conway so they can double-team O'Haire and powerslam him. Doesn't last for long as O'Haire recovers and tags in Mr. Black. The Prototype joins Cornette and Hill at the announce position and says that unlike other businesses where employees are treated like family, they expect O'Haire and Black to be at each other's throats and in fear for their jobs at all times. Prototype is also pissed that his upcoming house show match against Leviathan is non-title. Cornette says he still has to establish himself as a singles competitor after wrestling with Rico Constantino as a tag-team for so long. Cornette says that if he establishes himself at least semi-fairly, he will get his title shot.

O'Haire quickly tagged back in by a winded Mr. Black. He slams Dinsmore, goes for a swanton, but there's nobody home and Dinsmore is able to make the hot tag to Conway. Conway takes it to O'Haire (who's been in almost the whole match) and Mr. Black who is again winded after running into the ring. It's a pier four and in the confusion, Boland throws in Mr. Black's police baton to O'Haire. Mr. Black takes umbrage since its HIS baton and HE should be the one to use it, so he pushes O'Haire out of the ring, which allows Conway to neckbreaker him for the pin and the champs retain.

Winners and still champs: Dinsmore and Conway via pinfall at 5:50.

The Revolution (Big Bad John and "Smooth" Johnny Spade) vs. Mark Jindrak and David Flair. Jindrak and the [Sneaky Disturber] Spade start out and Jindrak clotheslines Spade out of his boots, so he tags in Big Bad John. Sidewalk slam on Jindrak and Spade is tagged back in.

Jindrak tags in Flair so he and Spade go at it. Flair goes for a figure four, but Spade kicks Flair in the face and tags BB John back in. John quickly dismantles Flair and tags Spade back in. Spade misses a swanton and Flair makes the hot tag to Jindrak. Spade is monkey flipped and BB John comes in to make the save as the ref is distracted by Flair trying to come into the ring. Just like that it's over as John powerslams Jindrak and Spade gets the 3 count.

Winners: Big Bad John and "Smooth" Johnny Spade via pinfall at 2:50. Thank you Drive Thru.

When we return a couple of zebras have joined Cornette and Hill at the announce position. Senior OVW referee Robert Briscoe is unhappy with referee Ray Ramsey's call in the Prototype and Rob Conway match of 12.15.01. Hill and Cornette agree that it was a bad call. (He allowed himself to be distracted by Kenny Boland during a pinfall attempt). Briscoe fines Ray $200 and says a notice of reprimand will be put in his file in the OVW office. Ray is upset, and starts to pull wadded up money, change, gum and keys out of his pocket to try to come up with the fine, and comes up with about $60. Ramsey tells his "buddy" Briscoe to lose his phone number, and Briscoe is surprised that some people just can't take criticism.

In pre-taped comments Trailer Park Trash says that Flash Flanagan earned his respect in their Trailer Park Street fight last month and that's why he helped Flash out when Leviathan and Syn were about to destroy him, and for the good of OVW, he'll continue to stand beside him in the future.

[The man who loves to steal the show] Flash Flanagan (w/[the heart and soul of OVW] Trailer Park Trash) versus "The Machine" Doug Basham (w/Queen Victoria). Lockup to start, and Flash quickly turns it into a brawl as he drops some fists on Basham as he covers up on the floor. Basham is sent into the ropes so Flash can do a slingshot legdrop off the 2nd rope and get a two count. Basham recovers and gets up on the apron, groggy, so Flash does a springboard and shoulderblocks Basham and himself to the floor! Flash throws Basham's carcass back into the ring and goes to the top rope, but Machine recovers enough to grab the rope and cause Flash to crash to the middle of the ring.

Cornette says that he will never allow Basham another title shot again. He can't fire him, but he can damn sure punish him by feeding him to guys who have a chance to get a shot at the belt. Basham Irish Whips Flash into the corner and gets a two count. Machine does a chain of vertical suplexes on Flash and again gets two. Basham goes to the top rope for the diving headbutt, but Flash moves and both men are down.

Flash recovers first and clotheslines Machine and DDTs him. Instead of the pin, he sets up for the whiplash, so Queen Victoria grabs his ankle to prevent it. TPT knocks Victoria out to prevent any further interference and gets up on the apron himself. Flash then accidentally pushes Basham into Trash, knocking him off the apron to the floor himself, and getting the victory roll for the win!

Winner: Flash Flanagan via pinfall at 4:35

Post-match, Bull Buchanan makes the save for Basham and Victoria and puts the spinning double axehandle to Flash. Trash gets back in, but he's also beat down by Bull. Conway and Dinsmore run out to chase of Bull as we're out of time.

Conclusion: Decent show this week. I was certainly surprised by Flash getting the victory over Basham. Good booking to have the rest of the Revolution in the match right before so they'd be too busy recovering to interfere. Prototype continues to impress on the mic. Again, if you believe Good 'Ol JR's report, he'll be on the WWF house show circuit with Lesnar and Constantino sometime around Wrestlemania. I "boldly" predicted the Damaga turn in the 12.15.01 audit, so no surprises there. I'm not all that impressed with him, so maybe this will be his chance to show what he can do (Like my opinion matters).

Red Dog looks pretty good, but like Benjamin, shows that his mic work is a lot of what he'll probably be working on here. Not a bad start to '02. Hope to see you all next week.

DrewDeuce
[slash] wrestling

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