Slash turns 3!!! CRZ is finally out of the terrible two's!!

I just want to send congratulations and thanks out to CRZ for keeping this excellent independent site running. It's got some great writers who entertain me with daily updates, and has the best message board of any of the sites I visit regularly. It's very much appreciated. I also appreciate that he actually posted my OVW musings for about 4 months until I ran out of steam and just couldn't muster the strength to keep it up (I'm certainly no CRZ). So thanks to Chris, the Cubs Fan, Brewguy, Seadawg, etc., etc., etc.

Last Week - OVW heavyweight champion, Nova and the "Lords of the Ring," ("Ironman" Rob Conway and "Mr. Wrestling," Nick Dinsmore) won a hot 6-man tag match against "The Revolution" ("The Machine" Doug Basham, the Damaga and "Smooth" Johnny Spade w/"Queen" Victoria). I had planned on "catching up" from where I last left off but I didn't realize it was THAT long ago (and the older tapes are already packed up for the move into my first house), so we get this instead.

"Let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the floor," let them please stop using this song ;-)

Opening Match: Redd Dogg (w/the injured Shelton Benjamin) vs. [the man who is from everywhere because his home is mobile - whoops along with his heel turn, he's pulled up his stakes in the trailer park and has set up permanent residence in Eastern Jefferson County] Trailer Park Trash (w/[the man who loves to steal the show] Flash Flanagan). Lockup to start, and Dogg goes behind. Trash puts on a headlock, but Redd Dogg powers out and the men use the ropes to launch themselves at each other until Dogg shoulderblocks Trash down. Trash retreats to the corner to recover and plan his next strategy. Announcers James E. Cornette and Dean Hill are still pissed at Trash for the heel turn and are talking bad about him living in Eastern Jefferson County now. Attempted lockup, but Trash kicks Redd Dogg in the gut and begins to pound on him instead. Trash misses a clothesline, which allows Dogg to use a belly-to-belly suplex on him. Lateral press, but the leg isn't hooked so it just gets two. Trash recovers and begins kicking the Dogg down and then rips at Dogg's face with his fingernails. Knife-edge chops on Dogg in the corner. Dogg reverses and gives them back in kind. Trash again claws at Dogg's face knocking him down. Scoop slam and Trash goes to the top rope, but nobody home. Dogg is up and is a house afire and goes for a powerslam, but Trash holds onto the ropes. Both men down, so Flash gets up on the apron to encourage Trash up, which brings Shelton Benjamin across the ring and into Flash's grille. Their struggle distracts referee "blind" (tm CRZ) Senior OVW official Robert Briscoe, and allows Trash to reach into his jeans for a pair of brass knucks. Dogg is able to duck the punch and get the rock bottom for the pin.

Winner: Redd Dogg via pinfall at 4:15.

We then go to footage of David Flair being attacked in a match by an unknown assailant a couple of weeks ago. This person used a slapjack on David's ribs repeatedly and has put him out of action for at least a two weeks. As the footage ends, the assailant is in the ring and clears the refs out. A couple of security guards actually rush the ring and get knocked down by the slapjack. This unknown person grabs the mic and identifies himself as "Travis Bane (I think that's what he said, there's nothing on their website), and you can call me a Solution, cuz I'm a Problem Solver, and that's what I do." He's got no problem with OVW, he's just here to take over. Apparently "the Comission" was aware of who he was because they gave him a wrestling license and now Bane wants to know if Cornette has the balls to let him loose in OVW. Cornette is agreeable, as long as he leaves the slapjack at home and will face David Flair man-to-man, and eye-to-eye at Six Flags Kentucky Kingdom on July 12. Bane leaves as Cornette threatens to call the police on him and they get medical attention for the security guards who were laid out.

When we come back from commercial, confirmation is given that Bane and Flair will meet at KY Kingdom and that as a result of the night's opening match, Trash & Flash have demanded a match against the Redd Dogg and Shelton Benjamin at the July 12 event.

Interview: Bolin Services. We now go back to footage from last week where in a very good match, the Prototype (you might now know him as John Cena) injured Shelton Benjamin with a piledriver! Good God, write up the death certificate now, oh wait, Shelton was out and got involved in the night's first match. As we return, Bolin Services ("King" Kenny Bolin, the Prototype and Sean O'Haire) are in the ring with Cornette. Cornette fined Bolin Services $3,000 for the two piledrivers he's done on OVW Champ Nova and the one on Benjamin. He refuses to take 10 free car washes and lifetime movie passes at Stony Brook cinemas (where I once ran into Bolin and a couple of wrestlers, wonder if he actually has a piece of that or is just friends with the owner?) as payment for the fine. Bolin knew that Cornette wouldn't accept that as payment, and he doesn't care because all Bolin Services' money problems have been solved with the Prototype's debut on WWE SmackDown! The "King" produces a cashier's check for the 3 grand and calls it chump change as Cornette turns his attention to the new Sting (According to pretty much everybody on the 'net. I never even considered this comparison. He's just too good as a heel, and Sting, well, he wasn't). Apparently he has Ruthless Aggression and was told so by the Undertaker and Vince McMahon himself. He has it so much, Mr. McMahon cut him a bonus check for $20,000 on the spot, so Cornette can have his fine, and then he gives James E. a $100 bill from his tights so he can "buy 4 cheap suits, 3 pairs of 'coke bottle' glasses, 2 cases of Sprite, and a partridge in a pear tree." Cornette (in a very loud red sports jacket and matching tie) is aghast. Then he gets down to business. He wants to know why his request for a title match against OVW Heavyweight Champion, Nova for July 12 at Six Flags KY Kingdom was denied. Cornette says it might have something to do with him being oh and FIVE against the champ. (Apparently Nova had a couple of wins over Prototype from a few years ago in another promotion and he used that to goad the 'Type and his ego into a championship match on his first night in OVW and won the belt. He's lost a couple more since). Cena says he made a name for himself that night on SmackDown! as well as a few friends in high places, and since he's the Perfect Man, not only because he looks good, but because "he's got it here" (points to his brain), he used $15,000 of that bonus to buy himself and insurance policy because he knew Cornette would screw him out of another opportunity. "That man hates you (points to Cornette), hates all of you (points to the crowd), and hates the USA (points to North America on a map, well, not really), but loves Ruthless Aggression." Cornette wants to know if this man is qualifed for an OVW title match. Prototype runs down this man's resume. He's a former Euro Champ, a 7-time Tag Team Champ, and the master of the Tables, Ladder and Chair match, he's Christian! Apparently, Christian and Nova have some 4-year old heat that will be blown off July 12. Cornette wants to know what's in it for Prototype. Cena is apparently a Ted DiBiase in training because Christian will turn over the title to Prototype after he's won it. This brings out Nova, Shelton Benjamin and the Redd Dogg. Nova says Prototype isn't the perfect man, but is really the "perfect puss." Nova does some math and says since Prototype has $2,000 left out of the 20 grand, he wants Prototype to put up what's left against him right now (non-title). After some goading the 'Type agrees and Nova says to make it fair, Benjamin and the Dogg will be at ringside to stop any interference. Cornette scraps the next segment and after commercial break it's on!!

OVW Heavyweight Champion Nova vs. The [Perfect Man] Prototype in a non-title match. Battle of shoves to start and Cena misses a blind charge into the corner. Nova punches Prototype a few times and goes to whip him into the opposite corner, but it gets reversed and he goes first instead. He tries to lift himself over a charging Prototype, but Cena grabs Nova out of the air and puts him on his shoulder for a slam, but Nova pushes off and pounds the Perfect Man's back. Nova sent into the ropes, but slides under Cena and backslides him down for a two count. Prototype back up, but gets a standing dropkick from the champ. Nova then puts Cena in an abdominal stretch but gets tossed over and the Prototype is now in control! For those that haven't seen Nova since his ECW "super-hero" days, he's wears his hair in a Shawn Michaels' ponytail, has some scruffy five o'clock shadow, and wears black leather/pleather pants. Cena beats on the slightly smaller man for a bit, and gets warned by referee "blind" Senior OVW Official Robert Briscoe about closed fists. Nova is able to move out of the way of a shoulderblock and gives Cena a boot to the face, a clothesline, a flying forearm, and a spinning DDT. Before Briscoe can count three, Sean O'Haire pulls him out of the ring and to the floor. This brings over Benjamin and the Dogg, taking all the peripherals out of the match. As Briscoe climbs back in the ring, Prototype low blows Nova (learned a thing or two in that match with the Nature Boy at KY Kingdom a few weeks back eh?), but only gets two. Prototype still in control as when we return from a commercial break. Cena puts Nova on his shoulder and puts him up straight long enough to show us the muscles on his unoccupied arm and then drops Nova back to earth. Scoop slam off the ropes for another two count. Prototype goes to the top rope and goes for a splash, but Nova moves out of the way. Some dance move punches and a body scissors for two by the champ, but Prototype kicks out and tries to mount a comeback. Enziguri to the back of Prototype's head by the champ, but again, only gets a two. Nova then slings Prototype into the corner, but unfortunately, also into referee Robert Briscoe, so his belly-to-back suplex on Cena is for naught as nobody is awake to count. All the peripherals are back in the ring at this point to brawl. As they leave the ring to fight, Prototype recovers and does an atomic drop on Nova, sending him into the ropes. However, as he follows Nova's momentum and tries to follow it up, he inadvertently runs into Nova's elbow, knocking himself out. Both men fall with arms on each other's chest and get the three count from a recovered Briscoe and OVW official Phil Fair who had come from the locker room. We go to commercial and when we come back, Cornette is in the ring with both referees and all three men agree that there was no winner and that there should be a rematch for the $2 grand.

Winner: No contest 6:20 aired.

Interview: The Lords of the Ring. Apparently, Doug Basham is peeved over the Revolution's loss to them last week and says that Nova gave them an unfair advantage, so he wants a one-on-one match with Nick Dinsmore tonight, which is just fine with "Mr. Wrestling." Conway says that the Revolution has been a failure because nothing has changed since they came into OVW, which brings out the Revolution. Basham is incensed and says that he will answer two questions tonight, the first being who is the best damn technical wrestler in OVW and the second being what happened to his heart. He says that the second can be answered by once again telling the tale of how his heart was ripped out by his uncle and OVW founder Danny Davis when he put all of his energies into training Dinsmore and focusing less on him. He was promised fame and fortune and that he would never have to work a minimum wage job again, but that was all taken from him when Dinsmore showed up. Dinsmore stole his WWE contract and his uncle, so he had to go out and earn another one to get back in OVW. When he did, the WWE told him to come back and take on all of OVW's top talent, and tonight he will prove that HE is the top talent in OVW.

"The Machine" Doug Basham vs. "Mr. Wrestling" Nick Dinsmore. The first ever OVW wrestler vs. the second. Basham tries to pieface Dinsmore, but Nick doesn't go down and shoves Basham back. Double kick to the gut by both men, but Dinsmore takes the least of it, and gives Basham an elbow off the ropes, a clothesline and a standing dropkick. Basham tries to recover in the corner and use the ropes to pull himself up, but Dinsmore grabs Machine's legs and yanks him into the center of the ring. Lateral press for one, then a series of head pounds to all four turnbuckles. Wristlock turned into a test of strength and is won by the Machine. Dinsmore struggles to get back to his feet and pushes Basham's hands to the mat and holds them there. Basham bridges up twice to avoid a count and gives Dinsmore some knees to the gut as Nick tried to put his knee into Basham's abdomen. Both men, with hands still locked, are up. Machine jumps in the air to try a hurricanrana, but Dinsmore catches him and tries to slingshot him back down. Machine is able to hold into Nick's midsection and floats under for a sunset flip. Dinsmore recovers quickly and boomerangs Machine into the corner, but Basham lands on the second turnbuckle and kicks a charging Dinsmore with the back of his boot. Machine tries the double axe handle off the second rope, but gets caught and falls prey to a Northern Lights Suplex. Machine powers out at two and floats over out of a suplex attempt and pushes Dinsmore into the ropes and into the Damaga who had just gotten up on the apron. Sunset flip on Dinsmore by Machine but it only goes for two. At this point Senior OVW Official Robert Briscoe ejects the Damaga from ringside and we take a commercial break. When we return, Machine is still in control and pounds Dinsmore down and into the ropes, where he chokes him a bit. Nick makes a small comeback but Basham is able to flapjack him face-first into the center of the ring. Lateral press by Machine on Mr. Wrestling for two. Basham is exhausted, so he goes to a headlock. Dinsmore powers up and tries to use the ropes to launch himself against Machine, but he misjudges it, and falls prey to a snap neckbreaker from Basham. Another lateral press, and another two count for Machine. Machine goes to the top rope for a diving headbutt, but Dinsmore moves out of the way and takes over with some punches to Basham's head. Dinsmore puts an atomic drop, and inverted atomic drop and a flying elbow on Basham before falling prey to Queen Victoria grabbing his ankle before he can finish Basham off. Basham puts his boot to Dinsmore's gut and performs a face-first gourd buster on him, once again getting only two. At this point, Rob Conway has moved to the other side of the ring to keep Victoria from interfering again, which distracts Briscoe allowing "Smooth" Johnny Spade to enter the fray and stop Dinsmore from suplexing the Machine. One german suplex from Machine later, Dinsmore has come out on the losing end of this hotly contested match.

Winner, and best damn technical wrestler in OVW this week: "The Machine" Doug Basham via pinfall 7:18 aired.

Post-match, Conway clears house, but the numbers of the Revolution soon take over and the Lords of the Ring get beat down as tv time expires.

Conclusion: As usual, an awesome show this week.

Thanks for reading and thank you CRZ.