/6 November 2000
WWF RAW is WAR
WWF 16 (+ 13/16
... last year: 23)
TONIGHT: It's a sold out house in Houston, because everybody saw the Rock do that thing to Austin on SmackDown! and tonight, they're supposed to TEAM UP against Kurt Angle and Rikishi? How can they *possibility* coexist? Find out - in seven minutes of show - and two minutes of bloopers!
TV-14-DLV-CC - One World Leader Attitude - WWF!
Highlights from last week's RAW - and SmackDown!
PYRO! We are LIVE from the Compaq Center in Houston, TX 6.11.2K and if it's TNN, it must be the WWF where RAW is WAR! Transmitido en espanol con SAP and a big crowd's at WWF New York, and I'm around 55 blocks uptown! Let's start things off with
VINCENT K. is here?!? YOU tell ME this isn't a sweeps month! Tonight's main event sees Rock and Austin team up against Rikishi and Angle, but there's so much more! Undertaker takes on Val Venis! Jerry Lawler will tie up with Raven! The Hardy Boyz put the gold on the line against the Right to Censor! And Steve Blackman puts HIS title on the line against Kane! But first....it's time for Vince McMahon to make a little noise. "With Election Day tomorrow, you have to wonder just who Stone Cold Steve Austin's gonna vote for. You have to wonder who'll the Rock vote for. You even have to wonder who will Al Snow vote for - after all, Al's vote counts as much as anybody else's. However, more important than Al Snow or anyone else that's been mentioned, the most important thing is who will each and every one of you vote for tomorrow." Lawler: "Tell us who to vote for, Vince!" "Now there might be some of you in this arena who say, 'come on, Vince, I don't care, I'm not gonna vote, 'cause I don't give a damn.' Well, I can understand that - why should you give a damn? Because for years now, the average American, the WWF fan has been what they call disenfranchised from the political process for a long, long time. You've been ostracized, you've been on the outside looking in, and the reason for that is that the politica pundits say they don't care about you. They don't give a damn about you. You know why? Because they say *you don't vote.* Now there's some truth in that statement - there's some truth to that statement; however, perhaps the biggest truth is you don't have a REASON to vote. Well here tonight, I'm gonna give you a reason to vote tomorrow. You see, when you think about it, you've got these various political candidates, the two major parties, and they've lined up all of their committed voters already. That's right. They've got the special interest groups, they've got the unions, they've got the corporation, the rich, all the individuals that vote in a block, they've got 'em all lined up, but guess what - they've all cancelled each other out. That's right. How ironic is it that despite all the money these candidates have spent? Despite all the special interest group and the influence-peddling, how ironic is it that not one - not one of the selfish political interest groups will elect the next president of the United States - they won't do it, but do you know who will? Each and every one of you. That's right, the average American - the WWF fan. And let's face it - you, indeed, have to face the fact that now more than ever, your country needs you to vote tomorrow. Your country needs your common-sense wisdom to elect the next leader of this great nation. Many of you may say, 'come on, Vince, once I get in there, I mean, I don't like any of these candidates.' You may say 'come on, I really don't have anybody to vote for,' and you might be faced with a choice of the lesser of evils, that's true - I still urge you to vote. There might be some of you, when you get in that polling booth tomorrow, who say 'wait a minute. I can't vote for any of these politicians because I think a lot of them are lying.' (sign in crowd: AUSTIN 3:16 SAYS DON'T TRUST ANYBODY) Imagine that - politicians that lie. However, I still urge you to vote NONETHELESS, despite the fact that some of these politicians might be lying - I urge you to vote for the politician that is lying the least - because, let's face it - tomorrow, come Election Day, you owe it to yourself to vote, you owe it to the great nation you live in to vote, and, by God, tomorrow, average Americans - WWF fans will in fact elect the next president of the United States of America. Thank you very much." I hear glass, and so does Vince - STONE COLD STEVE AUSTIN is out to offer his own opinion, I suppose. Four corner pose gives me a chance to flex my fingers a bit. "Welcome back, Steve!" Hand of Friendship. "Welcome back!" Austin decides on taking the mic away instead. "You know you're out here flapping your gums about politics and voting, and I think that's fine and dandy, but J(beep), it's Monday Night RAW, and Stone Cold Steve Austin - Stone Cold Steve Austin didn't come out here to talk about castin' a vote, he came out here to talk about openin' a big fat can o' whoopass! You see, tonight, Stone Cold Steve Austin has a tag match with the Rock. The very same man who, last Thursday on SmackDown!, gave me the Rock Bottom. So I'm just here to say this: Rock you can decide to double cross Stone Cold tonight, I'll be right here in the centre of this ring, givin' out these homemade knuckle sandwiches, and I think you know what I mean! The reason I'm out here, though, is real simple. You're in here flappin' your gums and I'm back there listenin', and the more I listen, the more I think. You know, who was the great mastermind who put together this big plan to take out Steve Austin? Because you know, Rikishi may have been driving the car, and as tough as he is, he ain't the smartest sumbitch in the world, so someone had to put him up to it! So who's the big mastermind that loves to manipulate people? Who's the man behind the scenes that likes to get people to do exactly what he wants people to do? Basically, what I'm sayin', an evil bastard sick enough to do this to Stone Cold Steve Austin. Yeah? I can see the look on your face - you're thinking the exact same thing that old Stone Cold Steve Austin is thinking. How do I know it wasn't Vince McMahon behind this whole plan? Blah blah blah blah, sit there and look at me in the damn eye, son. How do I know it wasn't Vince McMahon who pulled every little string, who--" KING KURT ANGLE & STEPHANIE ONO are out. "Hold it right there, bucko! No one talks that way to the father of my business advisor! How dare you! Just because the list of people is endless who'd want to take you out doesn't mean that you can pick on just anyone. I mean, heck, Austin, while you're at it, why not question George W. Bush? Maybe it wasn't Rikishi who hit you after all...maybe it was GW after he had a few cold ones - oh, it's true.
See, Austin, you may think you're in
your element - you know, the big man among all these drunken, beer
guzzling, foul smelling, yeehawing Texans...["ass hole"]...you know what,
Austin? That's just fine with me, because as an Olympic gold medalist, WWF
Champion AND representative of all fifty states, I am hereby renouncing my
ties to the state of Texas. You know what, Austin? If they wanta cheer a
loser like you, I say let 'em." Stephanie is in the ring, and in Austin's
face. "Who the hell do you think you are? I've got news for you, Austin.
You're not gonna put your hands anywhere near my father or MY business
partner, the WWF Champion Kurt Angle!" "Is that a fact?" "Yes." "Well,
you know what? I respect the fact that you're a woman, but for your own
safety you might wanta take about two steps back. There ain't a McMahon
around here that tells Stone Cold Steve Austin anything, and you ain't
gonna come out here and run your mouth in the middle of the ring--" Angle
with a forearm from behind. The McMahons hightail it -
"Iblockyourpunchyoudon'tblockmine," KICK WHAM STUNNER #24
STEP OFF BECAUSE
THE MAN SOMETHING SOMETHING FEELING THAT YOU WILL - replay, of course.
The Undertaker tries to run down some folks backstage. He's next!
The WWF Fanatic Series for November features "Hell Yeah: Stone Cold's Saga Continues." Wait...didn't it used to be Fanatix? Did they try to steal somebody's copyright? Naughty, naughty WWF!
The Dudley Boyz are an integral part of this ad for "No Mercy" for the N64
Moments Ago, Angle tried to sneak in one on Austin, but Austin turned it around. KWS: Please Don't Go!
Vince says he has a strange feeling something momentous is going to occur tonight, and this isn't the place for Stephanie tonight. He loads her in the limo. Before Vince leaves, Angle stops him to say "Mr. McMahon, I was very moved by your speech tonight...very inspiring. You're welcome. Take care of yourself, Steph. See you, Mr. McMahon. (after the car puls away) You're right, Mr. McMahon, this is gonna be a night like no other...especially for Stephanie's husband, Triple H."
HEY HEY HEY HEY v. BALD VENIS - somehow, the STEEL steps have magically levitated over to the barricade, standing on end! It's MYSTUFYIN', I tell ya! Let Us Take You Back to SmackDown! where the Reaper declined an invitation to join the Right to Censor. We learn that any RtC interference in this match will cancel their later tag team title shot tonight. Kick by Undertaker, soupbone, soupbone, back elbow, soupbone, threatening motions to referee "Blind" Teddy Long, back elbow, into the opposite corner, sidewalk slam, off the ropes with an elbowdrop, off the ropes with an elbowdrop, 1, 2, kickout. Venis has done NOTHING so far. Soupbone. Into the ropes, head down, kick by Venis, kick, sloooow neckbreaker gets 2. Venis right, right, block, soupbone, soupbone, soupbone. Into the ropes is reversed, back elbow by Venis, elbowdrop, off the ropes with a kneedrop, seven quick rights off the mount. Venis outside. Up top...but 'Taker pops up and grabs the tie - soupbone, soupbone, soupbone, soupbone, overhead beal across the ring. Got him in a choke...but Venis kicks out, kick, right, right, off the ropes, 'Taker with a clothesline. Warriors of Might and Magic Double Feature of the super beal. Venis kicks out at 2. Scoop...Venis wriggles free. Right, right, head to the buckle, into the opposite corner is reversed and Venis lands hard. Into the ropes, big Badass boot. 1, 2, shoulder pops free. 'Taker takes his head to the buckle. Soupbone. Into the corner, but Venis gets a foot up to stop the charge. Right, right, right, right, knee, 'Taker pulls him through the ropes and outside the ring. 'Taker follows - head to the STEEL steps, standing against the barricade. Back in the ring, whip into the ropes, Venis ducks a soupbone, gutshot by Venis, going for a suplex, but 'Taker blocks. Knee, knee,
wedgiebomb, 1, 2, 3. (5:09) I call him
Cowboy! Replay of the deal with the thing.
Triple H is WALKING! all the way to the Commissioner's office. After a brief buddying, bonding moment, H asks for the Radicalz. Foley says he can only do it if he finds three others to make it four on four. H says he has some folks in mind. Austin shows up at this point to ask about Foley teaming him up with the Rock tonight. Foley says he knows the Rock wouldn't be the accomplice, and teaming them up tonight should smooth things over. Austin says if Rock DOES try anything tonight, not only will be the Rock's ass, it'll be his ass, too.
Here's a look at the parking lot - we're waiting for the Rock, supposedly
Let Us Take You Back Two Weeks Where An Errant Cup Of Coffee Triggered An Epic Confronation For The Ages
MICHAEL KING COLE stands with Kane. "I gave you all a chance. I showed the world what I was - who I was - and the world didn't like it. You couldn't accept someone who was different! You put people like me in the closet. You hide us away - that way you don't have to acknowledge that we exist. You don't wanna see me - (whips back hair) - you don't wanna see what lies under this. You wanna see Chris Jericho. You want someone who you can look up to, someone you can idolize. Someone to cheer for, someone who's...pretty. You want Jericho. Well, the more you cheer for him, the more I hate him. The more you want to see him, the more I want to END him. And if the world won't accept the freak, then I'll give the world the monster." So why'd he challenge Blackman? "He is pretty as well." No, he actually says. "That's simple. After I beat Blackman and become hardcore champion, I'll challenge Jericho to a title defense. Then, when I tear his face apart - when I rip out his pretty blonde hair - when I beat him so bad that his appearance is so repulsive that he too wears a mask as a shield - when I do that, it'll all be legal." Well, that's pretty weak...yet logical...
Meanwhile, Dogg says he always has his back, but he hasn't spoken to him since he's been back. H says there's only one way they'll find out - go ask him themselves. Ask WHO? WHO?
WWF cookbook ad - some very kind person got me one, complete with signatures of Blackman, Angle and Ross. THIS IS THE GREATEST BOOK EVER!
Dudley Boyz "No Mercy" ad #2 - a different one. Buh Buh Ray fails to stutter.
Chyna and Billy Gunn are joking around when Triple H and Road Dogg hit the locker room. Triple H talks a lot about making mistakes - maybe they made mistakes too. But they have something bigger in front of them - the Radicals. They want a piece of them, so do they. They don't have to be friends. Maybe it's only for one night, maybe it's long beyond the point any of us are interested in them, but whaddaya say? Are you in? Is D-Generation X back together? Everybody shakes hands. I'm gonna go barf.
T&A (with Trish Stratus - the fitness model) v. TOO COOL (with WWF.com logo) - Big press conference Wednesday for WrestleMania at the Reliant Astro Arena - tickets for the event go on sale Saturday! T&A cut the dancing short and Hotty is tossed. Albert and Sexay in the ring - Albert with a right. Into the corner, yaaaah splash misses. Big boot by Sexay. Punch blocked, right by Sexay, tornado DDT.
Calling Hotty over -
but Albert catches the crossbody attempt and hits a yaaaaah slam. Hotty in
the ropes - Albert throats him with a catapult. Tag to Test. Right,
right, right, into the opposite corner is reversed, off the ropes, but a
big boot halts the bulldog attempt - Test gets 2. Scoop - and a slam.
Warriors of Might and Magic with the Double Feature. Test going up top -
but Hotty gets a boot up. Sexay gets the (it's been ninety seconds in) HOT
TAG. Right, right, right, into the ropes, boot is caught - but there's an
enzuigiri. Albert wants in but Sexay catches him straddling the top rope
and crotches him, bouncy bouncy! Hotty is over to clothesline him out, and
he follows - and so does referee "Blind" Mike Chioda. Back in the ring,
Sexay hits a dancin' dropkick off the second rope. Stratus is up on the
second rope - Sexay wants to punch her, but Test uses Stratus' boot on
Sexay. Chioda back in - 1, 2, NO! Hotty back in - Test going for a
poweromb, but Hotty falls backwards, goes off the ropes, and hits the
bulldog! "I'm going to do the worm" face! W O R M - hoo hoo hoo -
hiiii-YA! Sexay to the top - he's got the goggles - Hip Hop Drop scores.
But Stratus is on the apron again. Chioda is over to her, naturally.
Behind his back, Albert has a surprise yaah toss for Hotty and a big
yaaaaaaaaah Albertbomb for Sexay. Test over to cover him, Stratus off the
apron, Chioda around and counting a fall. T&A
win. (3:52) Post-match,
CRASH & A BLONDE
show up - Crash ducks a Test charge and lowers the
bridge, taking him outside, then landing a pescado. Meanwhile, a
distracted Albert falls to a Too Cool doubleteam. Now, the woman comes in
- looks like Starla Saxton/Mona - and works over Trish Stratus. She's in
pigtails - hot shot - springboard (almost falls) crossbody! Tossing
Stratus out of the ring as Crash's theme plays. Commentators are stupefied
as to her identity, so she ain't Mona - she has similar tights to Holly,
though. Must be his mother AND sister or something. Replay of what we
just done seen.
Hey look! It's the Radicalz and Terri! And they're WALKING!
Hey look! It's D-Generation X! One night only? They're WALKING!
"No Mercy" for the N64 ad #3 - see #1
And now, Warriors of Might and Magic present the WWF Slam of the Week! From SmackDown!, Triple H delivers a Pedigree to Benoit, but Guerrero uses his title belt to turn it around. The four are one...once again.
Hey, look! It's ROGER CLEMENS in the front row! But Lawler is more in a tizzy about galleryfurniture.com's JIM McINGVALE - Ross and Lawler give galleryfurniture.com a blowjob. I tried to visit the site but it was down - obviously some sort of testament to the power of being mentioned on WWF television!
D-GENERATION X - WELL, WHAT'S LEFT OF THEM (with RAW credits & TV-14-DLV-CC boxes) v. RADICALS (with Nipples) - Okay, if they're gonna spell it that way, then I shall too - we'll see if they stick with it. The second team comes to the ring to the "Aggression" DX theme, but without Run-DMC. I *won't* call him Billy Gee, 'cause it's LAME and GAY. Then again, Billy Gunn is kinda lame and gay, so maybe it's apropos. Guerrero and Gunn start. Duck, right by Guerrero, right, right, into the ropes, reversed, duck, duck, Gunn with a tilt-a-whirl slam. Tag to Chyna - Guerrero backs into her and has one of those classic reactions. Crappy elbow, crappy elbow, crappy elbow, into the ropes is reversed, gutshot, alleged swinging neckbreaker. Guerrero crawls to the corner, Malenko falls into a drop toehold. Tag to Dogg, left, left, left, juke, jive, right, into the ropes, head down, big back body drop. Saturn over to the adjacent corner to try to get referee "Blind" Earl Hebner's attention. Malenko reverses it with a right, kick, stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp, he falls outside. Benoit over to throw a forearm. Dogg put back in before Hebner can notice. Benoit tagged in. Backbreaker gets 2. Into the corner is reversed and Benoit falls backwards into Dogg. Benoit manages to get up first - running kick. Death suplex attempt is countered into a crossbody by Dogg for 1. Stomp by Benoit.
Benoit's clothesline is ducked, as is his
backhand. Benoit DOES manage a front face, Dogg shoves back into his
corner, but the other Radicals distract Hebner just before he can make that
tag. Saturn stays in and takes it to the Road Dogg. Into the ropes, head
down, kick by Dogg, but Saturn manages the Northern Lights suplex for 2.
Into the ropes, duck, mid-air collision puts both men down. Tag to
Malenko, HOT TAG to Gunn - he's a house on fire! Shots for everybody -
jackhammer for Malenko. Off the ropes, Guerrero puts a knee in the back,
turning him around to take a shot from Malenko. Gunn manages to counter
the whip with a Fame'Asser, but Benoit breaks it up. It's all breaking
down now - Pier Eight Brawl. Kind of a mess, really - nobody doing
anything important. H going for the Pedigree on Malenko - Guerrero tries
to save, but H shoves him to Chyna for another crappy forearm or two, DOES
hit the Pedigree on Malenko, and covers for the 1, 2, 3. I can't see how
Triple H was legal, but...oh well. (5:11) "The
Kings" proper plays, but
it's cut short as KING KURT
ANGLE runs back in, along with a renewed push
from the Radicals, and the forces of evil take control of the happenings
between the ropes. Angle lays the boots to Triple H, then takes off as the
Radicals' music plays. Angle smiles broadly and widely. Replay of the
Pedigree, pin, and punk out. We come out of the replay to see the Radicals
smiling and posing at the top of the ramp...
A limousine pulls up in the parking lot. Is it the Rock? Why yes, it is! And now he's WALKING!
"No Mercy" for the N64 ad #4 - see #2
And now, the WWF Rewind, presented by WWF No Mercy for Nintendo 64 - buy it wherever books are sold! From SmackDown! last Thursday, Ivory takes the Women's title from Lita.
WWF TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP: GOODFATHER & WALL BUCHANAN (with Steven Richards & Ivory...and Let Us Take You Back to Heat) v. HARDY BOYZ (with Lita) - Pier Four Brawl to start, but the Goodfather and Matt end up outside, leaving Buhanan and Jeff to go at it - into the corner, Jeff up and on the shoulders, Buchanan shoves him to the apron, head to the gut...butIvory pulls him off before he can capitalize! Jeff chases her into a Lita spear. Referee "Blind" Jim Korderas decides to ban BOTH of them from ringside. Back to the action, double gutshot for Buchanan, double suplex. 1, 2, no. Jeff stays in, right, right, right, kick, into the ropes, reversed, reversed to the first rope - chatting with Korderas while Goodfather throttles him behind his back. Oops, that's Matt - he's just got some goofy hair as well. Into the ropes, double gutshot from RtC - head to the mat - 1, 2, no. Lawler says he won't vote for Gore and Lieberman - they could be card carrying members of the Right to Censor! Running clothesline from Goodfather. Death suplex. 1, 2, no. Head to the boot of Buchanan, tag, into the ropes, gutshot by Goodfather, swinging neckbreaker by Buchanan. Arm wringer, clothesline. Tag to Goodfather, gutshot, into the ropes, head down, kick by Hardy, off the ropes, big boot by Goodfather. Sitting him up on top - right hand. Goodfather on the second floor, right by Hardy, shoving him off, super legdrop and both men are down. HOT TAG to Jeff! Ducks the clothesline, dropkick to Goodfather, shot for Buchanan, double leg for Goodfather, legdrop between the legs - Buchanan in, Jeff ducks, Matt with a punch - it's all down now, Pier Four ensues as Richards occupies Korderas' attention. Finally, Matt and Goodfather collide with Korderas, who falls outside. Goodfather dumped over the top by Matt. Matt on the corner- big splash to the floor! Jeff clotheslines Buchanan IN the ring, in the meantime - swantonbomb (sort of) lands, but there's nobody to count the fall! Jeff up to see what's going on - well, here's EDGE & CHRISTIAN - Jeff ducks Edge's clothesline and runs him out - Christian's Tomokaze fails when Matt makes it back in to give HIM a kick in the gut, and toss him outside. Poetry in Motion on Buchanan. Double gutshot for Goodfather, Poetry in Motion on HIM...no, Richards holds up the tag belt and Jeff runs into it. Goodfather covers, and Korderas is back up - 1, 2, 3!!! Ladies and gentlemen, we have NEW tag team champions. (5:20) Richards makes an array of exciting faces to celebrate the victory,
handshakes all around, and at the top of the ramp, a smiling Edge &
Christian. Here's a replay of how it all went down.
Kurt Angle is WALKING! He asks Garea and Long if they've seen the Rock. They direct him to the big door with "THE ROCK" written on it. "Thank you very much." Angle goes inside - "Hey Rocky!" - and WAFFLES him with his title belt. Garea, Long and Slaughter pull Angle off of him. Rock seems perplexed as to how he just got his ass beaten down.
"No Mercy" for the N64 ad #5 - I think - I'm losing count
Hey golly, it's one o' them Pat Buchanan ads! Oh my! Man, this ad is SO MUCH BETTER than those anti-immigration ads he insisted on running during SmackDown!
Moments Ago...three paragraphs ago
Your commentators are a pair of kings - LARRY KING & JERRY LAWLER.
Moments Ago, the Hardy Boyz just lost the tag team championship. "It's a damn shame!"
Backstage, Edge & Chrsitian celebrate their new eligibility for tag team championship shots with a kazoo rendition of Chris Benoit's theme. "Chris Benoit is here and he's really mad / Chris Benoit is here and he's really an-GRY / Here it is in full, the Chris Benoit song--" Foley interrupts with "Is there any wrestler who can prove him wrong?" "That reeked, Mick." "We're outta here." Foley says they should have been out long ago, when he gave them the night off. Yeah, but they got bored, they say. Foley starts in with a vibe that Christian describes as "suxual overtones" - Foley says their boredom will be relieved with a table match with the Dudley Boyz.
WWF HARDCORE CHAMPIONSHIP: WELL IT'S KANE v. MR. PARTY TIME STEVE BLACKMAN (with Riggs & Murtaugh) - Blackman dares him to meet him up the aisle, and Kane is accommodating. Kick by Blackman, right, right, knee by Kane, right by Kane, right, dropping him on the barricade, uppercut and Blackman goes into the crowd. Blackman manages to take HIS head to the barricade, though, then hits a Lethal Kick from the barricade to the floor, and apparently knocking the wind out of himself as well. DAMN! Kane rolls into the ring while Blackman tries to get his breath back and find some weapons as well. Kane stomps as Blackman comes back in. Right. Stomp. Into the ropes, clothesline by Kane. Kane grabs a garbage can lid...but Blackman manages a drop toehold. Blackman kneecaps Kane with a lid. Lid. Lid to the back. Kane pops up with a death suplex after Blackman hesitates. Kane with the lid...into the ropes, Blackman tries a roundhouse but misses - Kane hits him with the lid. Blackman tries to shake it off as Kane stalks - head to the buckle by Kane, into the opposite corner, sidewalk slam. Kane goes outside and climbs to the top floor - Blackman against the ropes to crotch him. Backhanded lid shot to the head. Blackman outside and he's got the "It's Party Time" sticks! Kane regards Blackman...and comes in - Hundred Sticks from Blackman! Stick in the crotch slam coming up - but Kane elbows away - elbow, into the ropes, Blackman slides under and uppernuts him with the stick. Stick in the back. Blackman outside, and bringing in the garbage can. Kane chokes him, but Blackman hits him in the head with the can, then comes off the top rope anyway - but Kane puts up the big boot to stop that. Running powerslam by Kane. Kane outside - grabbing the top half of the STEEL steps and putting it in the ring. Kane back in as well - ready to ... well, here's CHRIS MONDAY JERICHO (we all saw THAT coming) with a chair - WHACK! Kane falls and the steps fall on top of him. Jericho with a chairshot to the steps for good measure. Blackman hooks a leg - 1, 2, 3! (4:50) Jericho walks off with a serious look. Replay of the chair to the steps...to the mat.
Hey, the Rock is WALKING! He's looking for Kurt Angle...but he finds Steve Austin instead. He tells Austin that he hopes he demonstrated last Thursday that if he has business with him, he'd do it right in front of him. Austin says he hopes HE did the same thing Thursday. Rikishi's accomplice, whoever he turns out to be, is in line for a serious ass-whoopin'. Rock says somebody's ass should be whooped, but it won't be the Rock's ass, 'cause he told him he had nothing to do with it! "Well I guess I'll see you in the ring." "Damn right!"
WWF ShopZone.com ad - if you don't have a browser, you can call 203 601 5020 - but then, how are you reading THIS??
Moments Ago, Jericho and a chair stymied Kane's chances of winning
the hardcore championship.
JERRY LAWLER (already in the ring) v. RAVEN (with Tazzzzzzzzzz and the WWF.com logo) - Tazz takes Lawler's seat...to carry Ross. Lockup, to the corner, Lawler ducks a punch, Lawler with a right. Block, right, right, right. Fistdrop from the second rope. 1, 2, Raven kicks out. Raven muscles him to the corner, seven quick rights, five or six kicks, into the opposite corner, clothesline, bulldog, 1, 2, Lawler kicks out. Head to the buckle by Raven, again, head to another corner, Lawler starts growling and blocks the next one. Raven's head to the buckle, right, THE STRAP IS DOWN but this is Houston so nobody reacts. Right puts Raven down. Right. Wonder what's next - WHOA! A DROPKICK! Piledriver coming up - but Tazz hits the ring to stop that. (DQ 1:33) I wonder if AL SNOW will make the save - but of course. Bell clap with Head and a Head wearing crown. Tosses the crowned Head to Lawler, Head for Tazz - Lawler looks at the Head - and levels Tazz with it. Snow to Raven, Lawler to Tazz, Snow to Tazz. Snow's music plays as Lawler wonders what he's just done.
The Dudley Boyz are WALKING! and picking up a table.
Meanwhile, Edge & Christian are WALKING!
XFL cheerleaders ad - what'll they look like in heavy coats, I ask you?
"No Mercy" for the N64 ad #6
Here's a look at the exterior of the fashionable Compaq Center
WrestleMania X-Seven tix go on sale this Saturday. Call 713 581 1WWF if you're not at the Reliant Astrodome and let TicketMaster deal with your money!
Right to Censor huddles up backstage. "What we have just done tonight is one step closer to attaining our goal - soon, Mr. Venis - but for now, united with the strength of our convictions, there is nothing - or no one - that can stop us. We...are in...control!" Mr. Bischoff, paging Mr. Bischoff...
EDGE & CHRISTIAN (with RAW is WAR is brought to you by THQ's "WWF No Mercy" for the N64, 1-800-CAL-LATT, and Castrol Motor Oily!) v. THOSE DAMN DUDLEYZ in a table match - Edge and Christian meet them out on the floor and it's on. Edge and Buh Buh Ray go at it on the outside - D-Von puts Christian down on the inside. Edge hits the barricade. Christian dumps D-Von. Buh Buh Ray back in, right, right, right to Christian. Into the ropes, big back body drop. Into the opposite corner, but Christian ducks the splash. Poetry in Motion to Buh Buh Ray's back. They mock the Dudleyz - Edge asks Christian to get the tables, then Christian does D-Von's "testify" dance. Buh Buh Ray recovers and tosses Christian, sidewalk slam for Edge, "wassup" for Edge, "testify" dance, D-Von...get the table, but Christian & Edge double baseball slide dropkick the table into the Dudleyz. Christian works on D-Von on the outside while Edge and Buh Buh Ray go at it on the inside.
Full nelson atomic drop by Dudley. Table stood up in the ring -
Edge laid on top - Buh Buh Ray to the second floor....but Christian is over
with a low blow. Both Edge & Christian on the second rope...but before
they can superplex Buh Buh Ray through the table, the HARDY BOYZ run out
and move the table out of the way. Hardyz beat down Edge & Christian.
LITA is out as
well, and there's a scary 'rana for Christian. Dudleyz back
in - Christian gets 3D (Dudley Death Drop) through the table. (3:31)
Lawler: "Can't anybody have a match without somebody else interfering?"
Jeff with a swantonbomb to the floor, putting Edge through a table! That's
JONATHAN COACHMAN catches up with Rikishi, who is wearing (Virgil / Test / Scott Steiner)'s face mask. What happened to his nose? "Well, do you want to find out? Wipe that freakin' smile off your face, too. How many times do I have to tell you people out there that Stone Cold is all alone? It's not going to be a tag team match, it's going to be a handicap match - it's gonna be me and Kurt Angle out there pounding Stone Cold - You see, Rock was the one - Rock was the one - he was the one behind this whole deal! And whether you people like it or not, tonight, the truth comes out - bet that."
"No Mercy" for the N64 ad number...ummm...seven? JESUS
And let this be the LAST "Smack down your vote" promo we see...for a few years, anyway
Here's a look at WWF New York - inside, Debra samples the vittles
Michael King Cole stands with fellow King Kurt Angle. What's up with this sudden mean streak? "Oh, a little mean streak? Let me tell you something. I'm not only an Olympic gold medalist, I'm the WWF champion. See? Gold - gold. I have had the most successful rookie year in WWF history - I am not gonna be ANYONE'S whipping boy. Triple H thinks he can throw me around last week just because he can - well I showed him that I can do a heck of a lot, too. And the Rock - the Rock saw what I was capable of doing earlier tonight. And soon, Stone Cold will get his. Whipping boy. Children love me, dammit!"
Steve Austin is WALKING!
Meanwhile, the Rock is WALKING! Oops, somebody just shoved a large pile of heavy metallic objects into him. Hey, my kinda "walking" clip!
"No Mercy" for the N64 ad #8 - well hot damn, I probably got them all - now let's NEVER see an ad for this game again
...just like Jericho eating ravioli on a remote island
Moments Ago, the Rock was WALKING! Those big metal boxes oughta be OUTLAWED
During the Break, EMT's attempted to attend to the Rock - Rock made it to his feet...but fell over into the metal stuff again. D'oh! Foley asked for him to be loaded onto the gurney - he can't let him wrestle tonight.
RIKASHMONEY and KING KURT ANGLE (with Warriors of Might and Magic present Survivor Series 19 November!) v. STONE COLD STEVE AUSTIN in a handicap match - it's already two to the hour...this'll either be short, or this show is going WAY long. After Angle's entrance, we see Foley send off the ambulance with a promise that he'll get to the bottom of this thing. Say, Foley seemed pretty close to that situation, didn't he?
pulls Angle out and punches away - here we go. Right, right, right, into
the commentary table, right, right, kick for Rikishi, right, right, right,
right, into the STEEL steps, Angle gets in a shot. Into the ring, Austin
takes Angle as he follows in with a stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp,
stomp stomp stomp stomp stomp stomp stomp stomp, Rikishi over but Austin
punches him - right, right - into the ropes with Angle, back elbow. Into
the ropes, Thesz press, seven rights. Rikishi with an uppercut and FINALLY
Austni goes down. Stomp, stomp. Angle rolls outside to catch his breath.
Rikish slaps, Angle back in, double whip into the ropes, double clothesline
ducked, double clothesline delievered. Stomp to Angle's nuts as Hebner
checks on Rikishi. Austni stomps on Rikishi's nuts, but Hebner lets it go.
KICK WHAM but Angle shoves Austin into a Rikishikick. Angle stomp, stomp,
stomp, stomp, sotmp. Rikishi off the ropes with the drumstick drop. Angle
stomp, stomp, stomp, right. Rikishi right, right, Angle stomp, stomp, into
the opposite corner, fat ass splash finds nobody home. Austin with a
clothesline that flips Rikishi. Angle put in the corner, right, right,
right, stomp Rikishi, stomp, Angle with a waistlock, but Austin's trick
knee acts up. Parting the legs...and another stomp on the golden jewels.
Rikishi outside - he's found the sledgehammer. Double clothesline in the
ring and both Austin and Angle are down. Rikishi slowly climbs the steps
back into the ring. But Austin manages to recover enough to get first
strike on Rikishi - right, right, right, right, right, stomp, stomp, stomp,
Angle from behind, elbow, elbow, stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp. Right,
right, Rikishi sits on him, right, right, right, right, right, right,
right, right, right, right - THE NEW
MAN is out? Rikishi stomps. H goes
for Angle, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right,
over the top rope through the floor, got the sledgehammer. Austin is
stomping on Rikishi, and tosses HIM over the rope to the apron. And now -
oh yeah - Triple H takes the sledgehammer to Austin's head! "What the hell
is that? What the HELL is that?" Triple H puts on a black glove...right
hand! Thirty-two rights in total (I counted). There's one for Hebner as
well. Austin's blood is flowing. H with three or four more rights...now
directing Rikishi into a BAN - ZAI - DRAWWWWWWWWP! Ross swears that'll
stop your heart. "Someone tell me why, dammit!" H has the mic.
"Austin...your search - it's over. It's all - it's all over. Now you
know, you dumb son of a bitch." H and Rikishi exchange a high ten.
Rikishi gives Hebner another right hand. Ross: "Why, Triple H? You son of
a bitch! Why? Tell me why!"
WWF logo - and we're out.
Is H still a face?
Look, if you STILL don't want to vote because Bush and Gore are the same, why not go ahead and pull the lever for Harry Browne? The Libertarians are on more state ballots than the Greens, and they're not some flash in the pan party with a bunch of bandwagoneers who vote despite knowing NOTHING of the platform, and they're not a party that nobody will remember if they can't manage to find another celebrity to run, and they're the only alternative if you truly value your personal rights and individual freedoms. Visit the party website at www.lp.org and send a REAL message with your vote.
However, if you STILL can't stomach the thought of voting for a third party...
Bush is the lesser of two evils.
But you didn't hear that from me.