QUICK QUOTE: Markets weren't open for Labor Day - WWE 9.70 (- .21, last year: 11.30, two years ago: 21 3/4)

TONIGHT: The intercontinental title is on the line when Chris Jericho meets Rob van Dam! Also, his first interview since SummerSlam - we'll hear from Shawn Michaels! Come back in ten!

TV-14-DLV - CC - Attitude - Entertainment - Bischoff

Opening Credits - we can't go on like this - you can no longer refuse to see the change in me - WHY WON'T YOU WAKE UP

MUSCULAR DYSTROPHYRO - coming to you all the way LIVE from the Bradley Center in Milwaukee, WI Labor Day 2002 and airing on the New TNN & TSN!

TONIGHT: Intercontinental champion Rob van Dam meets Chris Jericho!

TONIGHT: Shawn Michaels' first interview since SummerSlam!

THE WIFESWAPPER kicks if off, as he so often seems to these days. Maybe *that's* why this show always seems worse than the other one...naaah. "You know...Brock Lesnar likes to refer to himself as the Undisputed Heavyweight Champion of the World, but ever since my competitor persuaded him to become exclusive SmackDown! property, I would say that that title is very, very disputed. And you know what - you fans in this arena who I love SO much...and fans from around the world deserve BETTER than that, dammit! You people deserve your OWN world champion! Exclusive to RAW, the #1 brand in the history, mind you, of sports entertainment...now Stephanie McMahon, she can refer to The Undertaker as the #1 Contender if she chooses, and that's fine, that's her prerogative, and she can have her match with The Undertaker and Brock Lesnar at Unforgiven - that's fine, because the world knows who the REAL #1 Contender is, don't you. That's right - he's the man that proved and convinced The Undertaker, right here on RAW, that it's much better to jump to SmackDown! and be a big fish in a little pond than it is to swim with the sharks on RAW. Ladies and gentlemen, may I introduce to you the REAL #1 Contender...TRIPLLLLLLLLLE H!" We are sadly denied the introduction of H's new "no foreplay" T shirt as H comes out in black polo shirt, slacks, nice shoes and belt. "You know, Eric, there's one thing you forgot to mention and that's the fact as to *why* Brock Lesnar left RAW to go to SmackDown! Let's face it - the reason Brock Lesnar LEFT...is me. Brock Lesnar knows that he doesn't belong in the same ring with me. Brock Lesnar knows that he can't hang with me in this ring. As a matter of fact, Brock Lesnar doesn't belong speaking my name. And the fact is, that the second I beat The Undertaker to become the #1 Contender, Brock Lesnar knew that his days as champion were numbered - so he took his belt, and he ran with his tail between his legs. You see, Eric, as it turns out, the Next Big Thing has no (balls)." "You know what, Triple H, you and I definitely are on the same page, man I agree with you a hundred percent. And, that's what I've always said about you, you know what I mean - you say what's on your mind - I mean, that's what I said when I first got here, if I would have been able to sign you to Nitro way back when, hell, I would - I KNOW we would have won the Monday night wars. No doubt in my mind. I mean, you kick ass - man, you- you- you- you just take control of the situation, you've been kickin' ass here in WWE longer than...than almost anybody! Your accolades here in the WWE are, are unbelievable, but you know what? They're about to become even bigger." Bischoff goes for his briefcase, and opens it to reveal...the Big Gold Belt. "Triple H - you may recognise this world championship, because you were the last man to officially wear it. It's been worn by some of the greatest champions in the history of this industry - and now, Triple H, it will be again - because ladies and gentlemen, your NEW WORLD CHAMPION...TRIPLLLLLLLLLLLLLE H!" H takes the belt and scales a corner - or two. Eep. "You know, Eric...a lotta guys have come out here and they'd say 'you know, God, what an honour but I really don't deserve this...' But then again, I'm not a lotta guys, am I. 'cause the fact is, YOU know it, I know it, and every single one of these people know it...that NOBODY deserves to be the World Champion more than me. NOBODY should be THE World's Heavyweight Champion more than The Game. And you know, Eric...I gotta hand it to you - you are a much better judge of talent than my ex-wife it. So let me tell you this, as your NEW World - no, hold on--" But instead, at this point RIC FLAIR makes an entrance. "Hey - like everyone else, if Lesnar refused to wrestle on RAW, the title he's wearing is most definitely disputed. And I think that the biggest wrestling company in the world, I'm talkin' about RAW, your company, deserves to have its own world champion. And you know what, Eric - I'm even inclined to go with - so far as to say as you may BE the man - after all, you wore this, you're the first, you wore it, you defended it, and everybody says now Triple H is the man - I got no problem with that. The problem I have is that you wore it once, I wore it sixteen times. And nobody gift-wrapped it, brought it out here in a gold Haliburton, and gave it to me - I won it right here by bustin' my ass, right in the middle of this ring. Bled, woooo!, sweat, and paid the price of a wrestling lifetime - so what I'm sayin' to you, and to you is, I think you need... not to just put that over your shoulder tonight - you need to earn the right the right to wear it out that door." "Hey you know what? He may be on to something, for the first time in a long time you and I definitely agree. But this isn't like SmackDown!, we don't need some bogus series to determine who gets a shot, we're gonna make that match right here tonight. First time in history, mind you, here on RAW - Triple H, the World Champion faces the Nature Boy Ric Flair. What are you thinkin'?" "I think...that it would be an honour and a privlege." "And I think I'm probably the luckiest man to be in this squared circle to know that I'm gonna wrestle you as the first contender - I'm equally honoured." Flair offers the hand - H starts to stick out HIS hand but shakes Bischoff's hand instead. "Triple H - do that world championship proud - and Nature Boy Ric Flair, seventeen could be right around the corner for you, my friend. Good luck--" But as Flair shakes Bischoff's hand, Triple H decks Flair with a right, dropping him in the middle of the ring. Play his music! I tend to think they script segments like that just to rile up the tOA Crew.

TONIGHT: Intergender tag team table match! Bubba Ray Dudley and Trish Stratus take on Christopher Nowinski and Molly Holly!

In the local slot, Stephanie must have bought some time (wink wink)... catch the WWE Tour of Defiance as they make their way to the San Jose Arena! It's the final SmackDown! crew stop before Unforgiven - Saturday, 21 September!

As for the RAW crew, the live event ad brings us back to the show with this list...Friday, Sioux Falls! Saturday, Rapid City! Sunday, Cedar Rapids! RAW is Iowa State University! Friday, St. Louis and Saturday, Casper!

Triple H is WALKING! Steven Richards and Johnny Stamboli offer congratulatory handshakes - hey, thanks for being a part of the show, guys! Bubba Ray, walking the opposite direction, bumps H as he goes by. H smirks and says "You got a problem?" and here we go....with more talking! "Yeah. I do have a problem." "Yeah - I'd say you do - I can see it in your eyes. It's the same look I'm gonna to see in everybody else's eyes when I walk through that locker room, isn't it? It's a look of jealousy. You're jealous. You know something? When you're as good as I am - when you're The Game, you get used to people lookin' at you like that - you get used to jealous expressions comin' your way. When you're That Damn Good, it's an everyday occurrence. But I'll tell you what - just keep that look. Unlike Brock Lesnar, there's no need for you to be jealous - 'cause I'm gonna give you the opportunity just like I'm gonna give it to everybody else, all you've gotta do, kid (pats his shoulder) - stand in line, and you'll get your shot at bein' the world heavyweight champion." He goes to leave, but Dudley grabs his arm. "You got it all wrong, man. This ain't the look o' jealousy - this is the look of HUNGER. The same hunger that every other guy in this RAW locker room has...the hunger to be the best in this business. The hunger to one day have the opportunity to be the world heavyweight champion - an opportunity that Brock Lesnar walked out with last week. You see, Hunter - that belt - that belt that Bischoff just gave to you - the belt that you so *proudly* wear on your shoulder right now...that belt is our salvation - and as far as that smug look on your face is concerned, heh heh, if I was you, I'd wipe it off...because one day somebody like me is gonna come along and SMACK IT OFF. And then one day *I* will be world heavyweight champion. Now if you'll excuse me - Champ - I gotta go and put somebody through a table."

TRISH STRATUS (Toronto, Ontario) and BUBBA RAY DUDLEY (Dudleyville - 310 pounds) v. CHRISTOPHER NOWINSKI & MOLLY HOLLY (with Earlier Tonight) in an intergender tables match
referee: JACK DOAN
Dudley's weight is WILDLY fluctuating - or Lilian's just making up weights, who knows. Here's your transcript as Nowinski spoke to JONATHAN COACHMAN: "Well, things between Molly and myself have been going great. And I'm sure that our chemistry outside the ring will translate INTO the ring tonight. And after Bubba and Trish go bursting through tables, I'm going to celebrate later tonight by bursting through something else - and of course by something else, I mean (looks to and fro) Molly's hymen." Lawler quickly picks up on his new favourite word - HYMEN HYMEN HYMEN HYMEN HYMEN HYMEN HYMEN HYMEN HYMEN okay shut up now. Men start. Lockup, side headlock by Dudley, right, right, rib shots by Nowinski, powers out, shoulderblock off the ropes by Dudley. Up and over - drops the elbow. Back to the side headlock - Nowinski manages to at least remove Dudley's cap from his head while trying to get out, powers out, hiplock blocked, Dudley with a clothesline to take him down. Head to the buckle, into the opposite corner is reversed, but Dudley comes out with a spear - right, right, right. Into the ropes, head down, kick by Nowinski, dropkick, forearm in the back, again, tag to Molly, into the ropes, double head down, kick for Nowinski, Dudley tries a powerbomb but Molly goes over the back and lands on her feet - she tries to grab a waistlock, but Dudley pulls her away and starts dancing with her. Molly is unhappy - tries a slap but Dudley blocks it...then pantses her. HYMEN HYMEN HYMEN nah. Trish in with a clothesline, clothesline, kick, moons her (well, thongs her), slaps Nowinski and tells him something too. Duck, forearm, forearm, forearm, into the ropes is reversed and Nowinski either pulls the hair (what was supposed to happen) or bumps into her, completely missing the grab (what actually happened) but in either case Stratus goes down. Molly goes for the double hairpull takedown. Head to the mat - again. Trish tries to fire back - forearm, forearm, but Molly hits a gutshot, and a swinging neckbreaker off the rope. HYMEN HYMEN HYMEN. Tag to Nowinski - he shoves her hard to the mat, and tags Molly back in - Stratus into the ropes, but manages a neckbreaker. If Lawler DIED, I'd be more relieved that sad. Tags on each side - Dudley clothesline, clothesline, into the ropes, big back body drop, big NOT back body drop with Nowinski landing on his face and shoulder instead - probably supposed to be a flapjack but he over-rotated - Dudley brings in Molly the hard way while Doan makes sure Nowinski's okay. Now Stratus comes in with a spear on Molly. Nowinski put in a corner, Molly put into Nowinski, and Dudley splashes the pile. Down goes Molly, and Nowinski falls between her legs - HA HA HA HE'S EATING HER OUT HA HA HA MOST FUNNIEST THING EVER I'M WRITING MY CONGRESSMAN. Nowinski comes up happy - double thumbs up from Dudley, then tosses him outside. Molly takes the flip flop and elbow. Nowinski in - scoop slam for him, Trish off the top with "What Are You Doing?" Trish! Get 'em. Table brought into the ring...and set up. But Nowinski is back up - and clotheslines Dudley down. He turns Stratus - but ends up backing her into taking the Molly-go-round from Molly! Dudley tossed out by Nowinski as Molly places Stratus on a table at ringside, then climbs up the post...Dudley back in, shoves her back to the centre of the ring, but Nowinski pulls HIM to the floor, conking his head on the apron on the way down - the HE climbs up top to attempt a splash to the floor...only to find no Stratus and one table! He's out, we're told. Molly brings Stratus back into the ring - into the corner is reversed, but Molly gets the elbow up. Molly starts to climb, but only finds herself in the perfect position to take the handstand headscissors. Dudley adds the powerbomb through the table in the ring and we're finally HYMEN (6:36)

TONIGHT: Kane takes on Lance Storm & Christian in a handicap match!

When we come back, Coach is standing with Lance Storm & Christian - tonight, their titles aren't on the line, but their *pride* is. What's so funny? "What's funny is the very notion of an American talking about pride. Come on. Americans wouldn't know pride if it came up and slapped Lady Liberty right across her fat face! You know somebody else who clearly has no pride is Kane. I know we were all set to burn the American flag last week and send this country a message that it would never forget, when that big red burnt-up freak came down and ruined everything. Well that's all right - 'cause tonight, we'll take great pride in ruining him." "What people don't understand here is we're not the bad guys. We're pointin' out the flaws in this country, so people can change their ways and NOT be hated by the rest of the world. You people don't even realise what a nation of hypocrites you are! Take Labor Day, for example - a holiday about labor which is celebrated by the fattest, laziest, most perennial unemployed people on the planet? How do you think the rest of the world feels about that? How do you think some ten-year-old kid workin' for forty cents an hour in a sweatshop makin' you your $200 sneakers feels about that? Yet somehow out here, we're the bad guys? It's unbelievable!" "It's unbelievable, that's what it is!" Test joins the picture at this point. "Try and look at the bright side here. Once you guys beat that big red loser, baby we're gonna celebrate by finishing what we started to do last week." And he shows off his WRESTLING TORCH

Meanwhile, Bischoff has Terri and Stacy Keibler in his office - later tonight, they'll be in the first-ever lingerie pillow fight. Presumably, once and for all, the question will finally be settled - what's better: tits or ass? Stacy's got assets but Terri's got pillows! "At least my PILLOWS are 100% natural!"

Meanwhile (3), Flair gets ready...and provides a captive audience as Jericho arrives his way. "I can't believe my ears! What the hell was Eric Bischoff thinking by awarding the very first shot for the brand new world title to you - a 53-year-old, over the hill has bean? Huh?" "I know what he was thinking - he was at SummerSlam when this 53-year-old has-been made you tap out to the figure four! Forgot about that? And you know what, as far as you bein' King of the World, King of the Universe - I don't even know what planet you're from, much less the world." "Hold on a second, Flair - you've got it all wrong. I actually hope you DO beat that assclown Triple H - and I'll tell you why. 'cause one of these days, you and me are gonna have a rematch. And if you're the world champion (woo!) when we have that rematch, and I beat the livin' hell outta you, then that title goes back where it belongs - around Chris Jericho's GORGEOUS waist. So good luck! Flair."

BOOKER T (Houston, Texas - 256 pounds - with RAW is brought to you by Stacker 2, Adidas and Foot Locker, and MGM's "Barber Shop!") v. WILLIAM REGAL (Blackpool, England - 240 pounds)
Lockup, no, knee by Regal, European uppercut. Big foreram - T fires back - right, right, right, right, right, right, into the ropes is reversed, but T reverses back and clotheslines him down. Knee by T, elbow, scoop...and a slam - mount, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, Patrick pulls him off. Regal sneaks in a left as T turns back. Into the ropes, Regal with an elbow. Elbow, elbow, elbow, into the ropes, reversal by T, side kick ducked and T crotches himself. Running knee by Regal puts T outside - and Regal follows. Coming up, Kane! T rolled back in, Regal beats the count at 3. Forearm across the chest, again, Regal pulls back on the arms. T isn't down for long, turning back around and breaking the hold - but Regal lands a knee. Forearm. Into the opposite corner, but it's T with the crisscross rollup - 1, 2, no! Clothesline ducked - back kick by T gets 2. T forearm, forearm, whip is reversed into the Union Jack, but Regal only gets 2! European uppercut by Regal. Regal waits for him to get up and gives him another one. A third time T goes down. Regal with a handful of hair - another elbow. T put into the ropes, but manages a knee coming off. Regal ducks the kick, gutshot - off the ropes but T is up and lands a side kick. Dueling arm wringers, T finally has the gutshot - off the ropes with the axe kick - aaaaand a 1, 2, 3. (3:14) Well, that was... "Kill the music! It ain't over yet. It ain't over 'til I give you what you came to see. The spinaroonie."

Michaels gets fitted up with a mic...he'll speak NEXT!

This month's Fanatic Series presentation is "NWO: Back in Black!"

Stacker 2 ad (Trish)

Take a look at the outside of the Bradley Center

Let Us Take You Back to SummerSlam and highlights of the Triple H/Shawn Michaels/sledgehammer matchup - oh oh, oh oh, oh oh, oh oh, oh oh, here come the hammer

In a wheelchair and LIVE from San Antonio, Texas is MR. WHYSPYR. "Well, Jim, as everybody knows I'm not a doctor and to make matters worse, I don't even play one on TV, so...ah...having said that I can tell ya at least how I feel. I do have feeling in my legs; it's just that my mobility is not where it should be, and more importantly (to me anyway) is that it's not where it was before the match, and ...until I get to that point, um...I'm gonna stay in this chair, I'm gonna go through the physical therapy, the rehabilitation, and eventually I'm gonna have no use for this chair, and I'm gonna get up and I'm gonna walk out of this chair." Was it worth it? "You know, King, I've had - I've had eight days to think about that - and, ah...I try to put myself back, you know, back in that ring, eight days ago and just think about all the emotions that were going on at that time, and the emotions that I felt the week prior to the match. And...I wondered, physically will be able to deliver - mentally and emotionally, can I, can I handle it - and...will the fans - will the fans even care, will they remember the show stopper? Will they hold me to that level and will I be able to reach that level, and ah...you know I got to see it back on tape...and, ah, it seemed like it was good enough for the fans, and therefore it's good enough for me, and...I guess, I guess to answer your question - yeah, it was worth it - it was....it was definitely worth it. And ah, you know, I - I have to thank God for giving me the privlege to just, to just get in that ring once again and do what I have loved to do for the last eighteen years of my life. And to do it in front of the people that I have so enjoyed doing it in front of. Um, the irony is, it's not, it's not the match that put me in this chair - it's Triple H hittin' me between the shoulderblades with a sledgehammer that put me in this chair." Does he have anything to say to Triple H? "Umm...it would be that I would think of all the people in the WWE that Triple H more than anybody oughta know the kinda guy Shawn Michaels is. But it's clear to me now that he doesn't, or he has just forgotten, so I want to say this to him plainly and clearly - Triple H...don't hunt what you can't kill. And what goes around - (displays sledgehammer) - is definitely gonna come around."

Triple H is WALKING!

TONIGHT: Lingerie Pillow Fight! Stacy! Terri! HYMEN!

RIC FLAIR (challenger - Charlotte, North Carolina - 234 pounds - with RAW Credits, transmitido en espanol SAP, TV-14-DLV & CC boxes) v. TRIPLE H (champion - Greenwich, Connecticut - 272 pounds) for the World Heavyweight Championship
Wow this entrance is going ON and ON and ON...but you know what's weird is that somehow they NEVER put together a graphic for this title and for these title matches! What could it MEAN? Okay, what happens when a dream match turns into a nightmare HERE WE GO! Feeling out process to start. Lockup, H to the corner...Robinson counts to hen forces a break by standing between them. We go - side headlock by Flair, chain wrestling to a hammerlock, drops down for a leg trip - and struts! Woooo! We go again - H with the headlock this time - HE goes to the hammerlock - Flair drops down with a drop toehold - floats over - front face - H reverses into a hammerlock - back to their feet - Flair ducks under and takes H to the corner - H with a back elbow before the break. Flair back with a chop! H goes outside...rushes back in but stops himself. Woooo! They lock up again - side headlock by Flair, shoves him into the ropes, shoulderblock by H - H up and over, Flair with a hiplock off the ropes. Flair applies the arm wringer - takes another turn then steps over and bends the arm in a way it warn't supposed to bend. Flair twists the wristlock one more time. Woooo! Flair moves to an armbar, steps over and applies pressure. H back to his knees - now back to his feet. Flair tries to turn it again, but H goes to the closed fist. Flair does NOT let go of the hold, but chops him instead! Flair with a turn - H punches, Flair turns it and chops back. Chop! One more twist but this time H cold cocks him with a right, taking him to the mat and breaking the hold. In the corner, H uses the right hand. Next one is blocked, Flair fires back, chop, chop, chop, into the ropes is reversed, and H gives Flair the Andersonbuster. H stands over Flair and gives him nine rabbit punches to the temple. In the corner, kick, kick, kick, kick. Into the opposite corner - FLAIR FLIP! HE ACTUALLY DID IT and ends up on the floor. Robinson starts the count...H shoves him aside at four and helps Flair in...with a suplex. H hooks the leg - 1, 2, Flair pulls the hair and slips out. H brings Flair up - elbow to the forehead, Flair chops back, chop, H gutshot, into the ropes, sleeper hold applied. Flair turns in and hits the death suplex! Flair's up - but the running kneedrop MISSES! H with an elbowdrop on the knee, elbowdrop, elbowdrop. H helps Flair up by grabbing his hair - H puts Flair's foot on the second rope, then leaps into a stomp on the back of his knee. H goes into a strut to a large negative reaction. H grabs the left leg and yanks back - again - and again. "NOW! NOW - we go to school - wooo! Woooo!" But as H drops down to give Flair the figure four, Flair wraps him up in an inside cradle - 1, 2, NO! H turns to Robinson to make sure it was two, then moves back to Flair - Flair ducks a swing, backslide coming up - 1, 2, no! H with a big clothesline to regain the momentum. Right hand. Flair chops back! H with a right, Flair chops back. H right, Flair chop - chop! Chop! Chop! H with a knee. Whip into the corner - Flair gets up the boot as H comes in - H whipped into the corner, Flair chops him as he comes out - chop - chop - woooo! Irish whip...but H puts up the elbow. Whip into the corner is reversed - H FLIP! Flair leans back but only for a moment - he wants to go outside but Robinson holds him back. Finally, Flair makes his way to H - only to go down as H gives him a hot shot from the apron. H rolls back into the ring - Flair with a gutshot - picks up H - picks him up again when they mistime it - then drops H's knee across his own. "NOW." Flair with the figure four! H screams...and quickly manages to reach the bottom rope. Flair lets go of the hold and gets back on him - stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp. H fires back with a right - but only serves to cue Flair to CHOP him! Flair with the strut! Flair pulls H back to the centre - but THIS time, H kicks Flair away - Robinson does a Herculean job of avoiding the collision, ending up out on the floor - but before he comes back in, Triple H sneaks in the uppernut while he's not looking. Pedigree is academic. 1, 2, 3, champ retains. (9:37) H is kind enough to keep selling the figure four post-match, so it's really hard to complain about this match - not that that won't stop a hell of a lot of people from trying. Post-match action has CHRIS MONDAY JERICHO run to the ring, shove aside Robinson and lock Flair in the Walls of Jericho. H is content to watch this from the aisle with a smile on his face...now ROB VAN DAM runs out, past H, into the ring, kick for Jericho, lots of elbows, stomping - H back in the ring - elbow, elbow, elbow, kick, into the ropes is reversed, van Dam ducks, van Dam kicks, and H goes outside! While van Dam points to himself let's fade to the ad break

The WWE Burn of the Night is brought to you by Stacker 2! From RAW, Kane returns in time to save...a flag

When we return, it's a (too) closeup of Bischoff. "Calm down. Relax, take a breath. We can work this out, but first you have to trust me, man." It's Big Show. "Trust you?! You want me to trust you? Two weeks ago you had Rosie & Jamal attack me. I haven't forgotten that. Trust you, you HAND Triple H the world championship. You don't hand out world championships - you're gonna hand it out, why don't you hand ME the world championship? I'm 7'2", I'm 500 pounds! NOBODY can do in that ring what I can do - you know it and everybody else knows it. You wanna, you wanna hand me something? You can hand me the #1 contender spot. You owe me, you hand me that, is what you can do." "Are you done? 'cause I'm gonna tell you something. You wanna be the #1 Contender?" "Damn right." "EARN IT. You've got a match coming up next with Tommy Dreamer - go out there and IMPRESS me. I dare you." "You dare me?" "I dare you." "You got it." As he leaves, Bischoff's cel rings. "Hello. What? Wait a minute - are you absolutely sure? You're telling me that someone is going to leave RAW tonight to go to SmackDown! to be with a family member? What the hell is that? Stephanie McMahon...the BITCH. Dammit!" What, does he have a mole or something? Ahhhh who cares

LANCE STORM & CHRISTIAN (tag team champions - 454 pounds) v. KANE (Parts Unknown - 326 pounds) in a handicap match
referee: Doan
Ross wonders if Kane has decided to join his brother on SmackDown! Doubleteam stompdown to start - well, Christian stomps and Storm forearms - into the ropes, double clothesline by Kane turns it around. Right for you, right for you, Storm into the corner, Christian to the opposite corner, "USA," clothesline for Storm, gutshot for Christian, pressed onto Storm, head to the buckle, gutshot, right, back elbow, into the opposite corner, double choke...and dropped. Off the ropes but Storm ankles him...so he lets himself out of the ring and heads out after him...until Christian gives him a forearm in the back. Kane turns back to Christian - and gets a drop toehold in the STEEL steps. The Un-Americans attempt to take over - Kane put back in the ring - Christian stomp, stomp, stomp, stands on the neck for 4. Barrelled ot the corner and Storm applies a choke while Christian works the body. Kane right for Christian, back elbow for Storm, right for Christian - choke for Christian, but Storm comes off the top to break it up. Christian covers, 1, 2, kicked out with authority. Blatant choke - and one more. Tag to Storm, doubleteam, forearms in the back by Storm, alleged snapmare, drops the elbow, again, *Storm* with a blatant choke. Tag to Christian - held open for the punch. Right hand by Christian, right, right, Kane fires back - right, right, scoop...wants Snake Eyes but Christian gets free and shoves him into the buckle. Wants the Un-prettier but Kane breaks free, gets Christian on his shoulders and drops him in an electric chair! Both men are down - Christian makes the tag just as Kane does the zombie situp - Kane right, right, right, into the ropes, big back body drop, big boot for Christian, Christian tossed over and out, Storm runs into a sidewalk slam - 1, 2, NO! Kane outside and climibing up - flying (ha) clothesline coming up - yep, he landed before he connected as usual. WHO MISSED THAT? 1, 2, Christian breaks it up. Christian heads out before Kane can pop him - back to Storm, who gouges his eyes. Christian throats Kane on the top rope, and he bounces back into a dropkick from Storm - hooks the leg - 1, 2, no! Storm pounds away and Christian is back in to help out - into the ropes - two heads down, kick by Kane, Storm ducks a clothesline, Storm tries a superkick that Kane ducks and Christian EATS - Storm choked - chokeslam - 1, 2, 3! (5:25) TEST is immediately in and puts Kane down with Wotsitolla Boot. Test picks up the flag and his torch, ALMOST puts them together too quickly, but BRADSHAW is out just in time - duck, right, right, right, right for Christian, boot for Storm, Test and Christian try to work with numbers but Kane is back up, and the ring is cleared. Kane sets the turnbuckles alight - but not the flag, which Bradshaw waves until it's all tangled up on its stick. TAKE THAT OSAMA BIN LADEN

The WWE Rewind is brought to you by the new Castrol GTX High Mileage - from last week, Tommy Dreamer gives up his hardcore match so he can lose to Rob van Dam...or something

WELL IT'S THE BIG SHOW (Tampa, Florida - 500 pounds - and RAW at Iowa State University hype) v. TOMMY DREAMER (Yonkers, New York - 252 pounds)
referee: CHAD PATTON
Show ain't patient - kick to start, in the corner, knee, into the opposite corner back first. Well it's the big suplex. Off the ropes as the onsale crawl starts - well it's the big legdrop - 1, 2, HE PULLS HIM UP!! Well it's the big hiptoss. Well it's the big headbutt. Off the ropes - well it's the big boot. Foot on the chest. 1, 2, Dreamer rolls away. Show is unhappy. Well it's the big forearm in the back. Into the corner, well it's the big clothesline. Well it's the big bearhug - and tossed to the mat. Into the ropes, well it's the big forearm in the back. Well it's the big death suplex. Show with the lackadaisical cover - 1, 2, Dreamer gets a foot on the bottom rope, which REALLY pisses off Show. Dreamer tossed to the outside. Show slaps his chest. Dreamer tossed into the STEEL steps. Show with a bleep for Lilian, then stealing his chair. Patton has full view so he doesn't swing it. Instead, he gets back in and I believe starts discussing the "McLaughlin Group 20th Anniversary Special" with him - meanwhile, Dreamer is back in and he DOES have the chair - Dreamer evades the punch aimed at the chair - WHACK (DQ 2:42) - WHACK - WHACK to the head - off the ropes - WHACK - timmmmmmmmberrrrrrr! WHACK WHACK WHACK WHACK - crowd chants "ECW" so he comes off the ropes and drops the chair on Show. Well, that was...

Backstage, Bischoff is WALKING! H stops him. "Hey - did you see that? Did you see RVD stick his nose in my business? I WANT HIM - TONIGHT." "Look, I know you want him tonight, but I can't do that. I've already got RVD in a match against Jericho." "Screw Chris Jericho!" "I can't screw Chris Jericho, it's done, the match has been made." "Listen to me - listen to me - am I the man around here? Am I the franchise player around here? Am I the world's champion? Yes I am. Then I get what I want - and I want RVD's ass tonight." Hey, stop reading into what he's saying, you pervert! "All right. All right, you want it, you got it. Here's what we're gonna do, all right? It's real simple. Main event--" Here comes Jericho. "Hold on a second, what do you mean it's real simple? I've got Rob van Dam tonight for the intercontinental championship - you promised me, it's already been announced. Huh? You're gonna change it just 'cause HE said so? The champ said so?" "Yeah. Because I said so." "When I became the champion, I beat two guys in one night. I didn't get the title from some cheeseball ceremony." "Look, guys! I don't have time for this, okay? There's a lot going on here tonight, I've got something I gotta do. This is the main event, this is the way it's gonna be - it's gonna be you two taking on RVD, Ric Flair, main event, all right? That's the match, that's the main event." Jericho isn't pleased - H is pleased enough.

Stacker 2 ad #2 (Trish again)

"WWE Superstars Posterbook 2002" ad

JEFF HARDY (Cameron, North Carolina - 218 pounds - with Castrol GTX High Mileage presents WWE Unforgiven on the 22nd!) v. CRASH (Mobile, Alabama - 220 pounds)
referee: Robinson
THE WIFESWAPPER is out before Crash's entrance is over. "Whoa, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, stop right now! There's not gonna be any match here - stop right now! And Jeff, you can wipe that confused coy look right off your face - you see I got it all - I got a call from a very reliable source that told me that someone was gonna be leaving RAW tonight to go to SmackDown! because of some...family issue? Well let me tell you something. I know you wanted to take care of business because of what your brother did to you, but hey - a little notice would have been nice. You know what I mean? It didn't have to be a month's notice - hell, it didn't have to be a week's notice - it could have been three minutes' notice." THE NEW GOOD OL' JR is out to double headbutt, double overhead flapjack, double elbowdrop - Hardy's chartreuse and white hankies (back right pocket) are left unscathed at least - and just before the final splash, Bisch speaks up again. "Now hold it hold it hold it hold it! Just for the record, this is what happens ANY time *anybody* decides they wanna leave RAW for SmackDown!" And there's the splash. "There, ya happy now? Ya satisfied?" But now Crash swipes the mic! "Mr. Bischoff, I just thought you should know...Jeff's not the one leavin' for SmackDown! - I am!" ZING - Bischoff was outsmarted by MR. HEAT EXCLUSIVE HIMSELF, CRASH. WAY TO GO. Bischoff *almost* seems geniunely guilty about the fact that he just took another year off Hardy's life.

When we come back, a red carpet has been rolled into the ring, a bedroom set has been assembled, and JERRY LAWLER has taken his place as Special Lecherous Referee...

STACY KEIBLER v. TERRI in a lingerie pillow fight - Maybe I'm gay - anyway, Terri wins. (1:44) Post-match, Stacy whacks Terri with a loaded pillow (loaded with an...alarm clock) - then produces a bucket of Castrol GTX (proud sponsors of Unforgiven) and tars and feathers her. Play her music 'cause she LOST!

NEXT: Triple H & Chris Jericho vs. Ric Flair & Rob van Dam!

TRIPLE H (world champion - Greenwich, Connecticut - 272 pounds) and CHRIS JERICHO (Winnipeg, Manitoba - 227 pounds) v. ROB VAN DAM (intercontinental champion - Battle Creek, Michigan - 235 pounds) and RIC FLAIR (Charlotte, North Carolina - 234 pounds)
referee: EARL HEBNER
We come back in mid-entrance but it STILL feels like it takes forever...van Dam spies H on the apron, but not Jericho behind him and here we go. Brief doubleteam until Flair comes out (Flair gets no entrance, hmmm hmm hmm) and trips up H - chop in the corner, right, right, right, meanwhile van Dam has turned it around on Jericho and is kicking away. H tossed out - Jericho put in the ropes - double back body drop. Flair to his corner as van Dam continues with the kicks. Forearm, into the ropes, Jericho ducks, van Dam leapfrog but Jericho's hooked the ropes - but Jericho runs into a kick. Hiptoss by van Dam, monkey flip out of the corner, backflip press gets van Dam 2. Elbow, elbow, into the ropes, Jericho slides under, leaps over the leg sweep, and launches an enzuigiri that finds the mark - 1, 2, van Dam's out. Right by Jericho, climbs into the choke. "RVD" chant. Jericho ignores HYMEN - Hebner - and moves back in on van Dam - into the opposite corner, van Dam up and onto the apron - shoulder through the ropes - back in and over with a guillotine. Tag to Flair! Chop! Chop! Right, left, right, left, right, left, right, chop, into the ropes is reversed and H throws up an elbow - then Jericho clotheslines Flair down. Tag to Triple H - stands over Flair for eight right hands. Flair dares him to come on - H right, right, Flair backhand chop, H right, Flair chop, H right, Flair chop, H knee - head to Jericho's elbow, tag. Jericho with a blatant choke on the second rope. Words for Hebner - and back to the choke. Wants the Boss Man straddle but Flair's outta there and Jericho throats himself on the miss. Everybody wants a tag, but the crowd is more interested in van Dam getting it. Tag to H - HOT TAG TO VAN DAM! Duck, kick, kick, kick is caught, enzuigiri is missed but the mule kick is not - dropkick - Jericho in, Jericho out, kick for H, into the opposite corner is reversed but van Dam gets the elbow up - vaults to the top - flying kick! Off the ropes, but Jericho trips him up...and when van Dam turns back to Jericho, he pops him through the ropes with a chair! That should be it - H with the cover as Jericho and Flair brawl - 1, 2, NO! Jericho shoves Flair into the barricade - H throws van Dam out to Jericho - Hebner busy trying to keep Flair from bringing himself OR the chair back into the ring - while outside, Jericho is working over van Dam's jaw by dropping it on the barricade. van Dam thrown back in and H covers - 1, 2, no. "RVD" chant. Elbow to the back of the neck - tag to Jericho. Jericho with a suplex. "C'mon baby" gets 1. van Dam to the body - left, right, left, right, left, into the corner, shoulder, shoulder, superfluous backflip, Jericho leaps over the next shoulder and manages a rollup - 1, no into the Walls of Jericho! Flair is in to break it up with a chop tout suite. Jericho shoves Flair to the floor, then tags in Triple H. Again Flair tries to get into the action and Hebner manages to hold him back. H drops the elbow. Flair swipes at H but misses from the apron. H with a facelock - van Dam tries to inch to his corner, but H lets go to pop him one - Flair doesn't go down, though - right hand, right, right, comes in - chop, chop for Jericho, chop, clotheslines Jericho out - H takes HIM out from behind. Back to van Dam but he's rested - backhand - again, again - forearm in the back by H. Into the ropes, van Dam back to back up and over, kick caught, but van Dam hits the stepover heel kick - off the ropes with Rolling Thunder - 1, 2, no! van Dam tries to build on the momentum but H is right back up with the gutshot - going for the Pedigree but van Dam backdrops out of the attempt! Spinning roundhouse kick! van Dam vaulting up - but Jericho shoves him off the top and into the ropes on his way back to the mat! FLAIR back in - Jericho ducks, chops, they trade blows and Flair ends up outside. Jericho with a Lionsault on van Dam! H covers - 1, 2, Hebner does his stupid foot shuffle which gives away a no count EVERY time - arrrrrrgh. On the outside, Flair ties up Jericho in a figure four - Jericho taps a lot since it doesn't count. Inside the ring, H has his belt - but van Dam kicks the belt into H's face! van Dam vaulting up - Fivestar frog splash! Cover - 1, 2, 3!! (9:37) Take a replay - when we come back, van Dam is posing with BOTH belts. Credits are up and we're out.

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