/12 October 1998
WWF RAW is WAR
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One World Leader Attitude - WWF! TV-PG-V!
Clip of September 5th - a smiling McMahon guarantees that Austin will no longer be the WWF Champion - stills of Break Down and Austin being pinned - clips of McMahon taking the belt and announcing there will be no rematch - clip of Zamboni fun, with Austin - clip of Austin being arrested - clip of Austin attacking McMahon in the hospital from last week. "Austin's intense personal rivalry with McMahon is out of control! But why has Mr. McMahon asked Stone Cold to appear tonight?"
Let Us Take You Back to Earlier Tonight, as VINCENT K. drives his Corvette into the Colesium (License Plate: WWF 1), after a brief delay by the guy running the garage door. Waiting for him are PATTERSON, BRISCO, and SLAUGHTER, who help McMahon into his automated wheelchair (labeled "MR. McMAHON" on the back and with a WWF logo). McMahon tells the stooges to make sure that the garage door guy grants Austin access to the building for later. Oh yeah, there's a hernia donut in the wheelchair, no doubt because last week Austin stuck a...no, never mind.
En espanol sea disponible! LIVE from the Nassau Colesium in Uniondale, Long Island, NY, it's WWF RAW for Columbus Day!
NEW AGE OUTLAWS v. ANIMAL & DROZ (with Hawk) for the WWF World Tag Team Championship - although Gunn looks less animated coming out with his partner, he still gives the standard "Suck it" shtick instead of answering the question of how he's feeling about DX at the moment. Droz is dressed in LOD 2000 gear, although no goofy helmets this week. Hawk joins the commentators and shares with us that he's sober - he was hooked on pain pills but he's kicked it. Animal has suggested he act as an alternate for the moment, so he'll back up Droz & Animal for now. Of course, Sunday at the big pay-per-view, the THREE members of LOD 2000 will take on DOA & Paul Ellering in a six-man. Tonight, an eight man tourney to crown a new Intercontinental Champion - seven matches and they still have time for THIS match? Apparently not - as soon as James hits his wobbly kneedrop (followed by a Gunn wobbly legdrop - that's new), out run DOA & MR DOT.COM, who beat up Hawk, then Droz - Animal finally sees what's going on, ducks out of the ring and joins the fray. Meanwhile, to tie up the Outlaws, the HEAD BANGERS run in and paste the Dogg with a boombox, right in the head. The Bangers take on the Outlaws Sunday at that same pay-per-view. (No contest, 'bout 2:00) Wow, instant tag team division! I guess this set up two matches, so good for the WWF. James is bleedin' good. Ross says about a million times that that wasn't a JVCKaboom!box because they don't shatter like that other one did. Replay of the boombox shot. I wonder if James blames Gunn somehow...
Your hosts are Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler, who provide all commentary. Tonight, Austin - what could he possibly do to McMahon? Last Friday, McMahon stripped Triple H of the Intercontinental title - tonight, a one-night, eight man tournament with the participants yet to be announced. We cut to a shot of McMahon backstage in his office, watching a monitor - split screen shows KANE entering the building on foot. To our first ad break!
Hey, look, the GIANT in an ad for "Water Boy!"
WWF War Zone for the Nintendo ad.
Chucky on USA ad. These ads show a strange confluence in the wrestling world, don't they?
Triple H and Stri-Dex - big chocolatey taste and only one gram of fat!
STEVE BLACKMAN (with Riggs & Murtaugh) v. KING KEN SHAMROCK in a first round Intercontinental Title Tournament match - Let Us Take you back to two months ago when Blackman saved Shamrock from Owen Hart and Dan Severn (back when they were friends) and Shamrock suplexed him in thanks. First round matchups have a twenty minute time limit. Ross thinks he hears boos for Shamrock - Shamrock attacks before the bell, but Blackman turns the tide and has a good flurry of offense, culminating in a 2 count. Shamrock catches Blackman, though, and counters into a powerslam. Shamrock IMMEDIATELY begins destroying Blackman's right knee, which is still not fully healed, we are told. Shamrock continues to kick the back of the knee, yank the leg in various painful directions, try to break the shin with a scissorshold, and so on. Bodyslam by Shamrock, another leg attack. To the corner, kicks to the leg. Whip, reverse, and when Shamrock charges out Blackman manages a lariat. Blackman also manages a shoulderblock, but walks into a leglock and while Shamrock puts on the anklelock, Blackman has no choice but to tap (2:30). Post match, both men are attacked by a mysterious masked figure in blue which Ross says looks like the BLUE BLAZER. Humm. My first though was that Scorpio was trying to change his gimmick again, but apparently Ross wants me to think it's Owen Hart, so that's what I'll think. Shamrock is sufficiently angered enough to slap the anklelock back on Blackman until the Cart Full o' Refs manages to break things up, but not after scattering in fear once. Shamrock makes heely noises to get the crowd to hate him.
Backstage, McMahon watches the UNDERTAKER walk into the building. Can NO ONE afford a rental car in this company?
Shot of Terri Runnels and Val Venis backstage, which leads into a Special Look at Goldust - clips from the '96 Royal Rumble show Goldust demolishing Razor Ramon (which is a bit of revisionist history, as at the time Goldust was a hated heel and Ramon a beloved face, oh and Goldust cheated a lot) and clips from WrestleMania XII where Goldust took apart Roddy Piper (which is a bit of revisionist history, as at the time Goldust was a hated heel and Piper a beloved face, and Ramon a suspended pothead - oops - oh and Goldust lost that match) - Goldust should return TONIGHT!
VAL VENIS (with Terri Runnels) v. MARVY MARC MERO (with WWF Women's Champion Jacquelin) in a First Round Intercontinental Title Tournament Match - I just figured out Terri wears those nipple-outline-showin' dresses to keep me from looking at her face! notthatthere'sanythingwrongwithherface... Next week, MOTLEY CRUE! says Ross. Jacqueline has her new belt, which isn't pink, thank God. Lockup, dueling arm wringers, Venis with back elbow, whip, reverse, foot up. Drop toehold by Mero. Drop toehold by Venis into the armbar. Power out, reverse, duck, duck, powerslam by Venis for 2. Double underhook by Venis, repeated knees and a suplex for 2. Whip into the ropes, Venis ducks and Mero hits the knee, then the kick, then an awesome DDT for 2. Whip into the ropes, high back body drop by Mero. Mero's punching away. We check out Sable's hair weaved into Jacqueline's as Ross tells us someone's arrived in the back. Samoan drop by Mero and both ladies are up on the apron, distracting Mero and referee "Blind" Jack Doane respectively. Next thing you know, Venis has Mero in the Perfectplex and it's 1, 2, 3 (2:15). Jacqueline is unhappy enough with things to give the bum rush to Terri. Venis saves Terri and Mero grabs Jackie to split things up. Replay shows a pretty good Attack From Behind by Jacqueline, interesting armscissors, and a bunch of refs who can't WAIT to break up the fracas. Quickie graphic shows Venis and Shamrock advancing, with the bottom half of the bracket to be determined.
Let Us Take You Back to Moments Ago - whoa, it's PAUL BEARER arrived at the arena! He's carrying a briefcase and Vince is unhappy that Bearer is here.
WWF RAW is brought to you by NAPA Auto Parts and WWF: The Music (Volume 2) available at Blockbuster Music.
MICHAEL KING COLE, backstage, drools over (THE LOVELY) SABLE, who appeared on Pacific Blue last night in a display of what they now call "acting." Sable says she has one thing on her mind, and that is becoming the WWF Women's Champion, then she goes into a room, brings out JACQUELINE by her hair ("her" being either Jackie or Sable's hair, depending) and drags her out to the crowd. Big brawl o' fun, but everyone's clothes stay on - what a disappointment! Mero and the cart o' officials break things up.
WWF Judgement Day promo. It's THIS SUNDAY! and presented by 10-10-321.
Let Us Take You Back to Moments Ago where you see what you just seen.
MANKIND v. MARK HENRY in a First Round Intercontinental Title Tournament match - Earlier Today, Mankind dropped these comments: "The fact of the matter is, is that Ken Shamrock doesn't really swing a chair hard enough to hurt me - as a matter of fact, in all the years and all the times I've been hit by chairs, the one by Shamrock was the weakest, wimpiest and wishy-washiest of the all, so I'm not all that concerned about Ken Shamrock at Judgement Day, and if he doesn't like it, well, I've got one word for him: Socko." Then Mr. Socko says "have a nice day!" Henry is slated to wrestle the Rock at Judgement Day - err, why? Oh well. Also, he's suing Chyna for sexual harrassment. Earlier Today, Henry said a little love poem to Chyna, which doesn't seem to make sense what with the lawsuit and all, nonetheless he reminds me a lot more of Mohammed Ali than the Cat ever did. Lockup, to the corner, clean break - no, Henry waffles him. Hey, there's CHYNA come out to cause trouble. They're trading blows in the corner and now Mankind is hitting more blows - until Henry powers him away. Mankind gets up and runs at him again, and Henry pushes him away again. Then, a GIANT clothesline from Henry. Whip into the ropes, military press slam by Henry (impressive!) followed by a big splash on the leg. Kick to the back of the knee. Elbowdrop on the knee. Another elbowdrop after some smack talkin'. Chyna looks on. Bodyslam by Henry. I bet Mankind wins...Henry positions him then goes to the second rope. Splash on the leg misses. Mankind with repeated rights. Whip into the ropes, reversal and Mankind falls - his leg is too injured for him to run the ropes. Whip again, Mankind ducks the clothesline and hits the double-underhook DDT. Mankind removes his show and then his sock - wait! It's MR. SOCKO and he's in the Mandible claw position - sure enough, he stuffs the sock down the gullet (ugh, I hope not) and Henry is out. Ring the bell! (3:18) Mankind limps away, leaving Chyna to enter the ring. "What do you want from me?" "It's out of my hands!" Hey, you know what would be cool? If Clarence Mason were litigating this sexual harrassment suit...
Backstage, we see a garbage truck pulling into the arena - no, check that, it's a cement truck and STONE COLD STEVE AUSTIN is doing the driving. Austin has yet another new T-shirt, apparently. Let's take an ad break and then we'll find out what's going on!
Michael King Cole has made his way to Austin to ask what the hell's going on - Austin says the one-legged bastard should come out and check out his work, something's gonna happen which will interest the McMahon family. A shot of McMahon's unhappiness in his office. Slaughter trips and lands on McMahon's injured ankle and McMahon fails to cry out in pain. Oh well, can't win 'em all.
JEDOUBLEF JADOULBEREDOULBET (with TV-PG-V ratings box and RAW credits) v. X-PAC in a First Round Intercontinental Title Tournament Match - Clips from SummerSlam and Break Down show Jarrett getting shorn, then Jarrett gaining revenge with a guitar shot. Sunday X-Pac takes on D'Lo Brown for the European title - hmm, he can't win the tourney then. Jarrett attacks before the bell and away we go. After the lariat, lotsa stompin'. Head to the buckle. Uppercut. Whip into the corner hard. X-Pac comes back with chops (woooo!), kicks, and a clothesline. Jarrett knocks him down, then hits a ten story back body drop. Stomp. Whip into the ropes, reverse, Jarrett slides under, clothesline is ducked, spinning kick by X-Pac. Whip, reverse, duck, clothesline with a flip by X-Pac. Well, it looked cool anyway. X-Pac climbs the ropes, but Jarrett hits the leg and he goes down. Jarrett climbs but X-Pac shoves him away. Moonsault (!) misses. Jarrett is up first and it's time to work on the leg - figure four attempt is countered with an inside cradle for 2 - close! Big lariat by Jarrett, who told us not to piss him off. Whip into the ropes, duck, but Jarrett hits a powerslam for 2. I wouldn't mind Jarrett becoming champ again. Into the corner, X-Pac ducks away and Jarrett hits the corner hard. X-Pac with a kick, another, then the climb the ropes to hit the spinning hell kick to the head. Unfortunately, coming off, he back elbows referee "Blind" Mike Chioda. When X-Pac goes for the bronco buster, Jarrett puts the boot up and hits 'Pac squarely in the sensitive area (ref misses it). Jarrett goes outside the ring where he's apparently previously hidden a guitar under the ring. However, opening the case (since when did he need a case?) reveals not a guitar, but HEAD. This surprises Jarrett enough to get rolled up for the loss (3:09). AL SNOW runs into the ring, grabs Head and walks off. Jarrett is suitably pissed - hey, you're not supposed to piss him off. I'm guessing there's a feud in here somewhere. Snow walks out through the crowd.
Wow, I'm surprised they didn't have a four minute time limit in the first round. Ugh. Anyway, Snow vs. Mero is announced for Sunday. They had a good match back at In Your House: It's Time, you know. Of course, he was Cassidy then.
Enough of that! Austin has positioned his cement truck strategically near the aforementioned Corvette. Good Lord, he's filling the Corvette with Redi-Mix cement! That stuff is heavy, you know - all the windows blow out and cement drips down all sides of the car. That is too cool for words, and I should have figured that out beforehand, but I'm glad I didn't.
wwf.com promo - interesting.
There's Giant again in a "Water Boy" ad. I should be sick of that movie by the time it opens.
Another WWF War Zone for the Nintendo ad. They just rerun all the ads from one hour to the next, don't they.
10-10-321 brings you the WWF Rewind, which is what we just saw with the cement truck. Well, that's memorable enough, I guess.
When you hear the breaking glass, it's cause a Corvette's windows can't STAND all that cement! Out walks STONE COLD STEVE AUSTIN to make noise. He thanks McMahon for the invitation and says something about the "Austin 3:16 construction company." He then says that McMahon "screwed" him in an amazing Bret Hart impersonation - well, maybe not. As long as they are both in the World Wrestling Federation, he will make McMahon's life a living hell. He also promises that Sunday, when he will be the special referee for the Undertaker/Kane title match, he promises that after the two big bastards beat the hell out of each other, the only hand he'll hold up is his own, and there isn't anything McMahon can do about it. Well, this brings out VINCENT K., a hooded, sunglassed, baton twirling man, and two K-9 cops with canines. You should recognise the hooded SWAT guy, anyway. Austin tries to rush McMahon but the dogs hold him off. "I hope you're proud of yourself! I hope you're real proud! What gives you the right to destroy other people's property? What gives you the right to pour concrete in one of my Corvettes? That was part of a collection, and now you've ruined it! I just hope that the Stone Cold Steve Austin Construction Company gives you a pair of boots, 'cause you're gonna need them tonight - you're going to be wrestling in that ring tonight. But you're not going to be wrestling by yourself, oh no, I've got a partner picked out for you...the so-called People's Champion, the Rock. Yeah, that's the good news if there is any good news. The bad news is that you and the Rock will be facing two individuals who I hope will annihilate each other on Sunday, you'll be facing the Undertaker and Kane. I also hope that the Austin 3:16 Construction Company is going to provide you with a real good rear-view mirror, because I think some time tonight, you're gonna have to have eyes in the back of your head. I think of all I"ve been through these past two weeks, and I admit, my life has been a living hell, I admit. What's the matter with you people?" "I don't know how good your hearing is, but you've got about fifteen thousand people calling you an asshole!" "Over the last two weeks, it all started after you lost the WWF title, and you recklessly and carelessly drove that Zamboni at full speed into the arena - you didn't care WHO you ran over as long as you got to me! And then from there, you got to me all right, and after you did, and because of you, the Undertaker and Kane crushed my ankle - it's CRUSHED! I may never, ever again play another polo match! I may never again ride a horse again, EVER, I may never again compete in another athletic event, and I hold YOU responsible. And then, in the hospital last week, my God, my head is still ringing from being struck in the cranium by that thick metal bedpan, my nervous system is still in shock over that defibulation! And my rectal area...when you stuck...YOU VIOLATED ME, AUSTIN! YOU VIOLATED ME! That damn open hospital gown, let me tell you something, as much humiliation as I've suffered, you'll suffer more, and I'll tell you where, and I'll tell you when. It'll be this Sunday, it'll be in Chicago, let me tell you something, if you DON'T raise the hand of the new World Wrestling Federation Champion and humble yourself before me, then read my lips. I promise you - I GUARANTEE you, Austin - that if you don't raise the hand of a new WWF Champion this Sunday, on the spot, I will FIRE YOUR ASS." "You stupid bastard, you ain't got the ball(mute) to fire Stone Cold Steve Austin." "I don't have the balls? I've got balls the size of grapefruits, and this Sunday, you're gonna be picking the seeds out of your teeth, because, Austin, you will be humbled, I guarantee it, one way or the other, the easy way - you raise the hand of the Champion; the hard way - I publicly, I guarantee, I will fire your ass this Sunday! Hit the music!" And Austin's theme plays while McMahon wheels away, followed by the hooded figure, then the K-9 patrol.
Ross apologises for the language - hey, I *think* I'll live. Lawler reminds us that every time McMahon makes a guarantee, it's proven out, and Ross agrees.
VAL VENIS (with Terri Runnels) v. KING KEN SHAMROCK in an Intercontinental Title Torunament Semifinal match - Shamrock rushes Venis from behind on the ramp. They brawl on the outside while Doane tries to get them into the ring. Venis whipped into the steps. Shamrock breaks the count even though the match hasn't started. Venis' head meets the STEEL steps again. In we go, and there's the bell. Shamrock continues to relentlessly pummel Venis. Whip into the corner, and Venis goes down hard (so to speak). Lariat by Shamrock. Bodyslam with authority. The way Shamrock is looking in this match as well as the first one, I guess he'll win it all. Especially since he's facing Mankind on Sunday, that'd be a good IC title match. Shamrock with a knee to the kidneys. Venis finally shows some offense with some elbows but Shamrock comes back. Now Venis puts up the big boot. Clothesline by Shamrock for 2. Snap suplex, nicely done, and Shamrock gets another 2 count. The small of the back is apparently the focus, says Ross, and Shamrock kicks the back to underscore the point. Belly-to-back suplex by Shamrock. Boston crab by Shamrock! This is some damn fine storytelling, and I have to commend Ross because I might have missed it otherwise. Does Tony Schiavone ever do this, I am forced to wonder. Venis reaches for the ropes and Shamrock pulls him back to the center of the ring. Smart Shamrock! Again Venis crawls to the rope, and this time he makes it. Shamrock again puts a big shot on the back. Another buttdrop to the small of the back. Now another. Ross: "Shamrock is like a machine." Ross notes more booing for Shamrock, well I can't hear it. Val comes back with some elbows and a side Russian legsweep. Bump'n'grind pose probably isn't the wisest idea here - and Shamrock makes him pay by kicking him away. Venis still has the big mo, tho - back elbow and elbowdrop for 2. Whip, Shamrock ducks, then clips him and Venis is holding his ankle. This signifies an anklelock for Shamrock and a tapout for Venis (4:36). I guess there's FIVE minute time limit in the semis, ha ha. Quick look at the tourney graphic. Suddenly...
GOLDUST'S theme starts, and there he is! Venis is still nursing an injured ankle and can't do too much moving around. Goldust does the gay shtick with the rope to his robe, then wriggles out of it and crawls towards Venis' corner (Venis' look is appropriately frightened). Goldust pummels up Venis, picks him up and places his legs on opposite sides of the turnbuckle. Then he inhales, snaps his jaw, gives the ol' quickie pelvic thrust, rares back, and kicks Val right in the Valbowski (or rather, in the turnbuckle just under the Valbowski, but we get the effect.) Goldust's theme plays while Venis moans in pain and holds his inner thigh.
Later tonight, Austin and Rock against the Fun Brothers! Coming up next, Cole will try to get through an interview with the Rock without getting insulted.
McMahon and the Stooges examine the car. This would be a perfect time to drop the Brisco Brothers' Auto Shop name, but they don't. Fortunately for us, MANKIND is there to say that it doesn't look all that bad. "I've seen worse than this - hey, this sock just came from Mark Henry's mouth, it's seen worse than this..." and Mankind goes fishing in the cement for McMahon's car keys. McMahon encourages him to stop but Mankind looks again...
Cole interviews the ROCK who reminds us that he's already beaten Undertaker AND Kane on separate occasions. He doesn't like Austin, either, so there. D'LO BROWN and MARK HENRY come out to ask Rock wassup whichoo. Rock says he'll talk to them in the back and they walk off. You like how Henry cuts his beard really high, trying to make us think that his jawline is two inches higher than it really us? I think I'll try that.
10-10-321 presents WWF Judgement Day SUNDAY!
MANKIND v. X-PAC in an Intercontinental Title Tournament Semifinal Match - Clips from Earlier Tonight show Mr. Socko meeting Mark Henry. Mankind is covered with cement from his fishing expedition. X-Pac is limping out as we see a Clip from Earlier Tonight of X-Pac pinning Jeff Jarrett. Lockup, headlock by X-Pac, Mankind suplexes out, then stomps on him. To the corner, head to the turnbuckle. Repeated rights by Mankind. Whip into the ropes, X-Pac ducks, shoulderblock by Mankind. Head to the buckle again. Whip into the opposite corner, X-Pac puts up a kick as Mankind rushes him. Rights by X-Pac until Mankind throws him over his shoulder and to the floor. X-Pac's head meets the STEEL steps. Mankind's looking for a chair and manages to find one. Referee "Blind" Mike Chioda manages to convince Mankind that a DQ won't get him the title so he throws the chair out. Headbutt by Mankind. Whip into the opposite corner, boot up, another kick, spinning kick, Mankind's down in the corner, yup, it's bronco buster time. X-Pac crotch chops, and Mankind manages to hit a forearm smash to the face. Poundin away, pull out your own hair, bodyslam, Mankind does it all. Kneelift and X-Pac is on the outside. I think I see the Dude Love shirt on under the shirt and tie. Ross tells us KING KEN SHAMROCK is making his way out to check out his opposition. Why does Mankind have "4" on his tie? Neckbreaker on the floor by Mankind. Shamrock waves to Mankind "hey howya doin." Mankind throws X-Pac in, Shamrock catches Mankind in the ankle with the chair, and X-Pac manages a cradle for the pinfall (3:16 - hmm). Before X-Pac can celebrate, Shamrock is in and putting a major league hurting on 'Pac. Belly-to-belly with a snap and height and it looked cool. Mankind tries to help X-Pac and Shamrock takes him out. Shamrock to the neck. Now a "figure four head scissors," says Ross. A gaggle of referees, then officials (Dave Hebner and Tony Garea) try to get Shamrock off of X-Pac, while Slaughter, Brisco and Patterson are out to tell Mankind that Mr. McMahon needs him in the back, taking him away from the action. The crowd has finally turned on Shamrock with a "Shamrock Sucks" chant. We take a break.
When we come back, it looks like Shamrock is STILL on X-Pac. HUNTER HEARST HELMSLEY is out on his crutches. Chioda asks X-Pac if he wants to continue and X-Pac says to ring the goddam bell. I think he says the ring the fuckin' bell, too, but we weren't supposed to hear that. Anyway, the bell rings and Shamrock is quickly back on X-Pac. Helmsley joins the commentary team. Shamrock is lethal, going to the head, to the neck, to the face, with all manner of slams and kicks. X-Pac valiantly tries to chop (woooo!) back, and punch, and Shamrock just decapitates him with a clothesline. Back kick to the head. Body slam - no, hot shot on the top rope. Shamrock goes outside and puts his neck on the apron, then elbows away. Shamrock breaks the count, goes outside, and puts on a Dragon sleeper-alike which must wrench the neck, 'cause X-Pac's screaming a lot. Helmsley says he's unhappy with McMahon because he didn't pick up the phone to tell him he was getting stripped of the title. Meanwhile, X-Pac has managed a spinning heel kick to the head on Shamrock. Whip into the ropes and another big spinning heel kick. To the corner we go, kicks aplenty by X-Pac. Bronco buster attempt coming up, and it hits. He's out on his feet but still standing. Kick attempt is caught, though, and Shamrock turns it into an anklelock. X-Pac crawls for the ropes and reaches them. Shamrock puts him in the anklelock again - X-Pac is crawling, reaching, crawling, reaching - Shamrock pulls him back to the centre of the ring and X-Pac taps. Ladies and gentlemen, we have a new Intercontinental Champion. (3:56) Ross plays up the performance - attacking the knee of Blackman, the back of Venis, the neck of X-Pac - "Shamrock was a calculated assassin!" MANKIND comes in with a chair just in case Shamrock decides to continue to beat up X-Pac, but he walks off.
Coming up next, the big tag team main event. Split screen shows Undertaker and Kane in different dressing rooms.
WWF Judgement Day promo.
KANE & UNDERTAKER v. ROCK & STONE COLD STEVE AUSTIN - when we come back, Undertaker is entering the ring and Kane is already in. They stare down and that's the standoff. The Rock is introduced first for the other team. Ross announces that the Shamrock/Mankind match Sunday WILL be an Intercontinental Title match, bringing the number of title matches to five. Let Us Take You Back to Earlier Tonight and show the cement truck filling the car with cement again - this time not cutting away to show Vince's reaction so we can actually see the back window get blown out. Man, that looked COOL. Austin is introduced and he walks to where the Rock is standing outside the ring. They look at each other, then both shrug and rush the ring. Of course, the Fun Brothers get the early upper hand - Kane with Austin and Undertaker with the Rock. Rock catches the Undertaker with a shoulder as he runs at him in the corner while Austin gets the upperhand with rights. Austin and Kane to the outside while the Rock hits an elbow. Austin and Rock doubleteaming the Undertaker! Double elbow. I guess the alliance is formed, Rock goes outside and Austin takes it to the Undertaker. Whip, and a clothesline. 1, 'taker pushes him off. Whip, duck, flying clothesline by 'taker. PAUL BEARER is walking out. 1, 2, kickout by Austin. 'taker's seen Bearer. Ross forgets the DNA test and says Bearer is "allegedly" Kane's father. Arm wringer by Undertaker - he looks at Kane and then stays on him instead of tagging. Pound on the arm. Bodyslam. Undertaker asks Kane what's Bearer doing there and gets no answer. Elbowdrop for 2. To the turnbuckle. Undertaker glares at Bearer, who is stoic (well, in a humorous way). Austin fires back and now he's wrapping 'takers leg around the ringpost. Back in the ring, armdrag and a tag to the Rock, who punches, then bodyslams Undertaker. It's time for the People's Elbow - 'taker Zombie situps, so Rock kicks him down and THEN snaps the elbow - funny spot. 1, 2, Kane breaks it up. Rock has him set up for the Rock Bottom but Kane again interjects himself. Rock turns to Kane, but forgets about the Undertaker, who chokeslams him and tags Kane. Short clothesline by Kane. D'LO BROWN and MARK HENRY are out for no reason. Kane takes Rock's head to the buckle. Punch, punch. Headlock, tag to Undertaker. Kick to the gut by Undertaker, clothesline, stomp. Choke. Ross says no more commercials (well, duh, it's three to the hour!) To the corner, another choke is applied. Elbow to the mush. Right hand. Arm wringer, tag to Kane. Kane with a right. Scoop slam - legdrop. 1, 2, Austin pulls Kane off of him. Kick to the gut by the Rock. The Rock with a few rights, but Kane chops him in the throat. Arm drag, kick, whip, Rock ducks and hits a DDT. Zombie situp by Kane. Clothesline by Kane. Suplex - no, he hangs him over the top rope. Kane hits a springboard kneedrop from one top rope to the other - neat. 1, 2, no. Tag to Undertaker, another kick to the gut. Kane gets a kick in for kicks. Undertaker takes a shot at Austin so that he'll come in and tie up referee "Blind" Earl Hebner while the Fun Brothers double team with a boot on the throat. Undertaker throws Rock out of the ring and Kane drops him on the barricade. Austin walks over but he's too late to help. Undertaker is outside. Headbutt. Clothesline to the back. Thrown back in, tag to Kane. Undertaker hols him wide open for a kick. Snapmare into a chinlock by Kane. Crowd chants "Rocky," go figure. Fighting back up, he's finally firing back with rights. Whip, reverse, Rock ducks and hits a Samoan drop! Both men are down. It's now 2 after the hour, time for something to happen. Tag to Undertaker, tag to Austin. There's the house on fire we all know and love. Meanwhile, Brown and Henry are destroying the Rock on the outside - big Henry splash on the floor! Undertaker with the big boot to Austin - he falls backwards and ties himself up in the ropes. Austin with a kick - he's loose! Now it's Austin with the clothesline on Undertaker for 2. Whip, reverse, Thesz press by Austin - Kane is in to break it up. Now Austin is headbutting Kane in the gut repeatedly. Undertaker grabs Austin. The Rock can't help. And now the hooded man is out and there's a nightstick shot - the stocking cap is removed to reveal THE BIG BOSS MAN. And now the tripleteam is on - VINCENT K. and the Stooges are out, all smiles, to look on. (DQ 11:13) Undertaker is trying to bend the leg in a direction that it don't go. Traylor is wearing a flak jacket but does look in pretty good shape. He's called "Big Boss Man" only this whole time. McMahon smiles and taunts, and the credits are here and we're out. See you Sunday!