/29 June 2000
Here's the short version: bad weather, long layover, hours of holding
pattern, and I slept in. Still, you got it on Friday, babe, so no
I GET LETTERS: Many people wrote me last week to say that Al Snow and The Droz had a hardcore evening gown match and shame on me for not mentioning it myself (if only I had remembered)
Jeremy Poursine is my hookup: Don't worry...you can still get to the old WWF site, with Blackman content and entrance video still intact...just go to http://woof2.wwf.com.
Just in case you need the Blackman fix.
The Rock says layeth the smacketh down if ya smell what the Rock is cooking UPN smell it!
TV-PG-DLV One World Leader Attitude - WWOR - SEACAUCUS!
Highlights from KOR - Shane chokeslammed from a very high point to a very low one, Vince's elbow is countered with Rock Bottom for the pine, Triple H said "curses!" and twirled his moustache. "The Next night:" Shawn Michaels had a major announcement, and introduced Mick Foley as the new commissioner of the WWF. There was a Triple Threat #1 Contender's match - won by the Rock, thanks to liberal interference by Chris Jericho. At Fully Loaded, the Rock will lay the smack down on HIMSELF!
Triple H and Stephanie are WALKING! Over to a cyclone fence with "COMMISSIONER" on a piece of wood attached to it. This must be Foley's office - a modified boiler room with a desk. Nice cactus on the desk. H tells Foley he never lost the title, he was screwed, and he wants his shot. Foley says he gave him a shot Monday. H says Jericho made sure he got screwed again. Foley says he doesn't give in to threats or intimidation...but he'll do the right thing.
Opening Credits - close captioned logo
Pyro alights and it's on one more time - we are on tape 29.6.2K (but taped 27.6) from the Hartford Civic Center and en espanol donde sea disponible! UPN will tell you all night in case you forget - THIS...is WWF SmackDown! Say...how about a match?
EDDIE GUERRERO (with That Slut Chyna) and RIKISHI v. VAL VENIS and CHRIS BENOIT - Let Us Take You Back to Monday where Trish Stratus and Chyna had what an old employer of mine liked to call..."issues." If you're gonna call him Rikishi, why not take the "Phatu" out of his entrance video? Commentators remark on the picture of Sinatra in Foley's office - I must have missed it. I DID see the Lava Lamp, though...my God, this match is RIFE with issues! Benoit and Rikishi erupt in punches while Guerrero and Venis stay inside and THEY work on each other. Benoit out, Rikishi scoop slam on Venis, tag out. Trademark senton. Off the ropes is reversed, back elbow by Venis, elbowdrop, tag. Benoit charges in but falls into a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. Into the ropes is reversed, Guerrero ducks th eelbow, but Venis puts one in the back. Guerrero shoves HIM off the apron, then hot shots Benoit. Backdrop suplex gets a near fall. Benoit arm wringer, off the ropes, Guerrero ducks but Venis lower the bridge and Eddie goes outside. Venis kicks a field goal and puts Guerrero back in. Benoit with a backdrop suplex of his own - for 2. Head to the buckle, tag to Venis, kick, kick, head to the adjacent turnbuckle, into the opposite turnbuckle with a followup lariat, back to the opposite corner and another clothesline, Blue Thunder powerbomb, 2. Tag to Benoit. Open kick. Hard into the corner, gutshot, vertical suplex is attempted but Guerrero lands on his feet, then rolls up Benoit for 2 - the kickout puts him near Venis, who throws a KO punch. Tag to Venis. Guerrero put in the corner, but the charge is met with an elbow. Venis presses Guerrero up from the charge, but Eddie improvises a dropkick at the top. Hot shot by Venis. Into the ropes, head down, kick by Guerrero, Venis' clothesline is ducked and Guerrero opens up - two rights and repeated headbutts. Knuckle lock, running to the corner and climbing the ropes...Benoit is in as well, so Guerrero springs off with a 'rana for Benoit while simultaneously hitting the armdarg on Venis! Forward roll to Rikishi for the HOT TAG! Right here, right there, double clothesline, Samoan Drop for Benoit, superkick for Venis, Venis into Benoit, fat ass splash on both men, clothesline for Venis, but Benoit manages a clothesline on Rikishi. Guerrero in with a clothesline on Benoit. Now T&A are out, but Albert has to turn back from the ring when Chyna engages Test. Albert holding her back. TRISH STRATUS (THE FITNESS MODEL) is out. Now TOO COOL is out and I'm starting to feel like a sucker for providing play-by-play for this match as referee "Blind" Teddy Long calls for the bell. (DQ 4:34) The highlight of the post-match shmozz is Chyna giving Albert a nutshot. Rikishi's music plays as the five stand in the ring. OH BOY! Chyna and Eddie are gonna dance with Too Cool and Rikishi! WOW! Suddenly, WHO CARES that that pretty good match was totally screwed over - LOOK IN THE RING! THEY'RE DANCING! Oy...it's gonna be one of THOSE nights...
Earlier Tonight, Kurt Angle asks Kaientai that he'd like to be called King Kurt from now on...he's the equivalent of an emperor...or a warlord...or head ninja. "Ninja?" "Or whoever rules you guys, but the point is..." Hardcore Holly appears and interjects. "What the hell are you talking about? They're not stupid, they're Japanese!" "Excuse me, did I summon you?" Holly says he'll leave him to his troubled communication problems...and punts his crown off a chair on his way out. "You just kicked my crown!" "You don't like me kickin' your crown? How about later tonight I kick your beep? How ya like me now?" And off he goes. Angle stands in stunned disbelief. "He kicked my crown!" I'm sensing a new catchphrase for the Big Shot...I think I'll have to give him a new nickname.
Trash Talkin' Stage ad
Commentators hype "Freedom," a new series coming to UPN. "This looks like the Matrix!" "Well, it's geared to your demographic - and it's ONLY on UPN!" That's paraphrasing.
KING KURT ANGLE v. KOOL MOE DEE - "You know something, Hardcore - I don't make fun of you because you dye your hair (or what's left of it, anyway). I don't make fun of you because you couldn't afford an orthodontist when you were growing up, and now you have these protruding bucklike teeth, oh no. But yet you choose to mock me by kicking my royal crown and costing me thousands of dollars in damages. To me, you're no different than anyone else here tonight; in fact, you're just like them - jealous, foul smelling peasants! I mean, do you realise how hard it is to find a crown repair shop in this city? It's true - it's true. Or as you people in Hartford would say - 'it's true - now call me a moving van so I can get the heck out of this town before I kill myself.'" Holly hits the ring, ducks a clothesline, and opens up. Right, right, right, into the ropes, knockdown, clothesline, Angle tries to leave the ring, Angle pulls him back in, stomp, tying him up in the ropes, badmouth, right, right, kick - referee "Blind" Jack Doan pulls him off as Angle frees himself and steps outside. Holly follows. Right, to the barricade, another run into the barricade. Right. Whip into the post is reversed and there's Angle's first offense. Stomp by Angle, back into the ring we go, field goal kick, right, right, right, right, right, Doan warns him. Chop! Holly starts to think about the no-sell. Another chop - Holly peps right back up and reverses positions. Open-handed slap, another. Into the opposite corner is reversed, but Angle puts up the foot - then runs smack into a belly-to-belly suplex. Celebrate, stomp, cover, 2. Vertical suplex by Angle gets another 2 count. Angle's mouth is bleeding - to the headlock we go. Commentators say that Jericho's interference on Monday ALSO denied *Angle* his shot at the title. Holly to his feet and punching out of the hold. Off the ropes, duck, crossbody by Holly for 2. Holly off the ropes into a big knee from Angle. Stomp, mount, punch. Doan and Angle have a brief discourse. Angle scoops up Holly for a slam. Angle to the outside and climbing the ropes - but Holly makes it over and tosses him. Backdrop suplex from Holly and both men are down. Well, it's been four minutes, bring on the run-in! Both men slowly up at 6. Holly with "Iblockyourpunchyoudon'tblockmine," right, into the ropes, Best Dropkick in the Business. Angle to the ropes - Holly pulls him off his feet - then kicks in a sensitive area. Jackhammer (?!) for 2. Into the ropes is reversed, Angle's clothesline is ducked, but he muscles him to the mat. Stomp on the head. Picking Holly on his shoulders, Holly punches but Angle manages the powerbomb...for only 2. Right by Angle, into the ropes is reversed, pickup, Angle down, waistlock, Holly with back elbows - three - reversing the waistlock...Angle's trick knee acts up. Scoop...and a slam. Angle on the top ropes - moonsault! Looks like his feet landed RIGHT on his ....err..."little Hardcore" as well. Post-production commentary has Cole saying Holly's left arm might have been broken as well. Holly knees out of the Olympic Slam attempt. They exchange punches as we check out the Twix Double Feature. Now Angle is in control...head to the turnbuckle. Into the opposite corner, off the ropes to try the bulldog but Holly clotheslines him. 1, 2, NO! Angle to the corner - Holly grabs the leg - but Doan pulls him off, saying there'll be no "un foul" stuff happening in this match. Of course, irony strikes as Angle puts an uppercut between his legs after Holly shoves off Doan - Olympic Slam! 1, 2, 3. (7:23)
Stephanie tells H that Jericho will pay tonight. Mick's intimidated and he'll give them what they want. Stephanie tells him to calm down, step outside and get a breath of fresh air...but be careful!
Meanwhile, the Commissioner gives audience to Edge & Christian. They proclaim themselves a little sore from their match with Kane & the Undertaker, and don't think they want to defend the titles against the #1 Contenders tonight. Mick says he feels a little bad about what happened Monday, so there WON'T be a title defense tonight. He says instead that we'll have some "friendly singles action" and books Christian against Kane, and Edge against the Undertaker. "You guys are SO gonna get the crap beat outta ya!" As they walk off, Christian mutters "that's MY line..." Ahh, THERE'S the picture of Sinatra - Mick sings to it in his style. "Whooo-ooa...Hit me baby one more time!"
UPN WWF SmackDown bumper - same one - arrrgh
Get ready for Maximum Power - brought to you by RC Edge Maximum Power cola! From RAW, Vince received another "final indignity" prior to being written out...once again. This time, the Rock provides it.
STEPHANIE ONO comes out to "My Time" alone, having sent her husband out for some fresh air. "She's the only champion left in the family!" Oh man, this should be painful. Let's pause for this chant of "slut." "I came here tonight...to the city where I was born - Hartford, Connecticut - to set the record straight! Triple H did not lose the WWF Championship at King of the Ring. He didn't - my FATHER did. As a matter of fact, it's only because of my father and mother's unhealthy relationship that six-man match was made in the first place. But Hunter and I have an extremely healthy...and virile...relationship. And I STAND by MY man! And my man stands by me! That's why tonight, Hunter and I went to the new commissioner and demanded a match with Chris Jericho - the man that cost Triple H the #1 Contendership Monday night on RAW. But you know what, Commissioner Mick? I'm a very impatient woman - and I'm tired of waiting. So Mick, I DEMAND you come out here...and give me my answer! A woman of my stature should never be kept waiting." Aw GEEZ. Here comes COMMISSIONER FOLEY. Big chant of "Foley!" "I didn't know that about Hartford being your birthplace - that's very touching. A little bit ironic too because I guess you would probably know that Hartford means quite a bit to me, too. Because it was in this very building, In This Very Ring, or maybe more accurately, Through This Very Ring - that your virile husband forced me into retirement. Steph, what I want you to remember, think back if you can to the way I looked when I left that ring a beaten man, right? Blood running down my arm, a little tear in the corner of my eye, streaming down my cheek - well just four months later, the ironic thing is - look at me now! I mean, in addition to having a new sleek, aerodynamic haircut, I've got this huge smile on my face because you and I both know that I can screw around with your husband's career...just like THAT! And the thing is, Steph, I don't feel one bit responsible because Triple H brought it all upon himself - you see, no no he did, because the way I see it is if he hadn't beaten me In This Very Ring, I'd still be an active wrestler which certainly means your mom (Linda McMahon) would not have made me the commissioner of the WWF, which means I would not have been in a position to make a match to cost your husband HIS #1 Contendership for the WWF title. Steph, don't get me wrong, I'm not here to make the WWF my personal little playground, because I think, above all else what I want to do is make sure everybody - in Hartford, Connecticut (thumbs up) - and around the world sees one hell of a show tonight!" "We've got the match?" "I guess what I'm saying...that as the commish, I'm going to grant your wish and I'm going to give you Triple H and Y2J In This Very Ring! Put 'er there - yeah! ...as part of a six man tag team match! You see I've given the matter some thought and I certainly think Y2J and Triple H deserve to be in there together, and Triple H will have as his partners...X-Pac and the Road Dogg." "That sounds fair." "It sounds good! And on the other side will be Y2J and...the Posse, no...Patterson and Brisco, no...no, on the other side it'll be Y2J and the Dudley Boyz!" Stephanie ponders this. "God I love the commissionary position. Yeah!" Mankind slaps some hands on his way out..
Chris Jericho is WALKING!
Oh MAN those White Castle burgers look good
wwf.com - new look, same attitude! Now Steve Blackman free.
DX says there should be no problems tonight - the Dudleyz have to still be feeling the effects of the dumpster ride. Y2J better look out!
THA GODFATHA (with eight - no, four ladies) v. BULL BUCHANAN - "It's time--" and the music fires up, cutting him off. That's a point for Bull right there! Did I mention he's got new music? "No, I'm gonna get this in. Now before I was so rudely interrupted, it's time once again--" but the giant international "NO" symbol appears on the OvalTron and some beeps and buzzers overpower the PA. And out comes STEVIE RICHARDS in cropped hair, slacks and tie. "Steven! The name is Steven, Mr. Godfather! And I'll tell you what I'm doing out here. I'm doing exactly what I did last Monday night on RAW. I saved millions and millions of viewers out there in TV Land from seeing the bare naked breasts of Terri Runnels! Steven Richards did what the network would not do - he did what the producers of the program could not do! I personally took the responsibility to censor what I feel to be vile, profane and unacceptable marketing material! I did what any respectable organisation would do if they had morals, which this one does not. And Godfather, I'm giving you fair warning, right here on SmackDown! to CLEAN UP YOUR ACT! Stop bringing the half-naked women to the ring! STOP promotiong SEXUALITY! Or Steven Richards will be forced to censor your activity!" Godfather ready to go out after him, but Buchanan hits him from behind and this match is on. Axehandle to the floor. Right, whip into the ring is reversed, Buchanan skins the cat to avoid the followup, the slides through with a dropkick. Back into the ring for the standard punchfest. Buchanan's "will he won't he" leap to the top rope and clothesline off actually lands perfectly this time. Big boot off the ropes. Right, into the opposite corner, Godfather puts up a boot. Running clothesline. Off the ropes, shoulder block. Into the ropes, back body drop. Hey, you think they'll go off the ropes? Godfather with his "spin around for no reason" legdrop. Into the opposite corner, Bull gets up to the second rope but leaps into a fist. Put in the corner, and it's time once again. No, Buchanan jumps OVER him as he comes in. Godfather dumps Buchanan onto the apron, Godfather shovs him off. Did Buchanan just strike one of the women? She comes up pulling her ankle. Godfather puts Bull back in the ring and makes the mistake of looking ringside as one of the other women tries to tell him about the pulled ankle of the FIRST woman. This allows Bull to come in with his "quick camera cut assisted scissors kick" for the pin. (2:19) That Richards thing could be interesting...if they'd done if the FIRST time they threated to do it, six months ago.
Kane is WALKING!
Meanwhile, our tag team champions: "What am I gonna do? I'm facing Kane next...this SO....totally sucks!" "I'll take 'Duh' for two hundred, please." "I gotta think of somethin'..."
More ads - NEXT! UPN!
Earlier Tonight, we learn that Kurt Angle broke Hardcore Holly's arm with the moonsault. Of course, that means that the WWF just banned the moonsault. Grisly spot shadow of the injury in this replay
KANE (with TV-PG-DLV ratings box) v. CHRISTIAN (with Edge - and Edge's music) - Twix presents Fully Loaded 23 July from the sold out Reunion Arena in Dallas, Tejas! Twix - it's all in the mix! Edge tries to distract Kane long enough for Christian to attack from behind...but it has no effect. Only in 2000 can you use one half of the tag team champions as 80's style squash fodder - witness Stasiak & Palumbo! Witness...oh wait, ECW doesn't HAVE tag team champions. Edge attempts to provide some outside interference, but it works about as well as you'd expect. Christian FINALLY takes charge with a drop toehold into the STEEL steps. This lasts until Kane throats Christian on the top rope. Kane up for his flying clothesline - Christian meets him up on the ropes - Kane throws him down and goes ahead with the clothesline, which ALMOST impacts before his feet land, in a shocking change. Back for another heapin' helpin' of SQUASH. This is what I like to call CANADIAN PRETZELS!! Kane puts Christian into the corner - only problem was referee "Blind" Jim Korderas was already there. Christian ducks the followup clothesline - but Korderas doesn't. Big kick by Kane - Edge in for the spear - but eats a clothesline instead. With his back to Christian, though, this is the best opportunity to try the Tomokaze - but Kane breaks free and puts Christian on his shoulders - Chrsitian punches out and breaks free - off the ropes, into the choke. Edge in with a chair - Kane has HIM in a choke...damn, the ref must be out for a reason. Ahhh, THERE'S our run-in...it's TAZZZZZZZZ. And HE'S got a chair. WHACK for Kane! WHACK! He walks off as Cole asks "what the hell did he do that for?" Edge & Christian sandwich Kane in a double chairshot. Christian covers and Edge rousts Korderas. 1, 2, 3! Holy crap! (4:45) I take back *everything* I said about squashes and jobbers and all that...except that bit where I made fun of Keith.
Moments Ago, Tazz confused all of us.
LILIAN GARCIA stands with the tag team champions, and congratulates Christian on his victory. "Yeah, congratulations to me! Man, I don't know how I did it, but I did - it's like they say: good things SO do happen to good people, and if I can get past Kane, Edge, I KNOW you can beat the Undertaker!" "I wasn't 100% sure about it before, but I feel a lot better about it now. I can SO totally do this!"
Here's a shot of WWF New York! And inside is Jim Ross - or so we're told.
Courtesy: MTV, here's some highlights from yesterday's TRL featuring Wyclef Jean and the Rock.
And here's the video of Wyclef Jean's "It Doesn't Matter" - well, part of it. I thought there was SkyDome stuff as well, right? We DO get slo-mo of Rock kissing a right.
Coincidentally, WYCLEF JEAN is in the front row! Here's a look at his CD cover!
The Dudley Boyz and Chris Jericho share a few uneventful words about their upcoming match
Meanwhile, Undertaker is WALKING! And ... chewing!
WWF SmackDown! returns in a moment on...
UNDERTAKER (with Kid Rock's CD cover and A Beautiful Titan Bike) v. EDGE (with Christian - and Edge's music) - Tonight, WWF SmackDown! is brought to you by RC Edge Maximum Power Cola, Stacker 2, and Castrol Motor Oily! Earlier Tonight, Tazz came out and attacked Kane for no apparent reason. I have to admit that my bias comes through here. Since this is the WWF, I have faith that this "meaningless" attack by Tazz will come together later and be shown to actually have HAD meaning. If this were WCW, I'd just be bitching creatively about how much that sucked. As for THIS match, Christian does HIS bit to provide interference, including distracting referee "Blind" Tim White long enough to allow Edge to swing a chair. Punching in the corner...Edge sets up the chair for a boost, but 'Taker catches him in a choke, anyway. Kick by Edge to break free - going for the chair again - 'Take catches him in a choke again. Chokeslam! Good night! (1:47) Christian is in with a chop block, and the tag team champions work a doubleteam. KANE slowly walks out to help - when he finally hits the ring, he surprises each man with an uppercut. Kane chokeslams Christian as Undertaker debuts his "I can't tombstone anymore" powerbomb on Edge. "American Badass" plays and Undertaker and Edge both give a "power to the people" fist. Replay of the powerbomb as Cole sells us on how devastating a powerbomb from the Undertaker could be and we really won't miss the tombstone at all, will we. I'M NOT BUYING IT! LET THE MAN PERFORM HIS DAMN MOVE!
Al Snow is WALKING! "I gotta be Blackman - no I gotta be me - no I gotta be Blackman - no I gotta be me--" He walks by a nearby concession stand, where the shutter opens to reveal Mick Foley. "Well, hello, MICK." Foley says it's time to let bygones be bygones, and he's gonna give him a title shot tonight. "Oh, really! Me and the Rock?" Foley does a classic spit take (mit Pepsi!) and erupts into laughter. Foley says it's a Hardcore title match..."and bring out that wacky Head thing you used to do...the people love that!" Snow starts in with facial ticks and walks off: "you're lucky you're commssioner..." Hey, Lawler spots the spit take!
Highlights of the WWF/Viacom deal, which was cleared Tuesday after the WWF/USA trial ended. SmackDown! gets three more years on UPN. RAW, the War Zone, LiveWire and Superstars will move to TNN. Heat moves to MTV. And there will be more series to come!
Does anyone else think all these shows should change their names once they move networks? Or would that do more harm than good with a bunch of already confused wrestling fans unable to figure out how to change the channel? I'm more in mind that it's the beginning of a new era...therefore, time for a new show name.
Moments Ago, we're gonna give that powerbomb one more blowjob. PLEASE accept it - the Tombstone is evil!
WWF HARDCORE CHAMPIONSHIP: AL SNOW (with Head) v. CRASH (with Scale) - Snow comes out to his old "What does everybody want?" music...and hides under the ring. Crash officialy has no last name now (effective last Sunday), but ring announcer TONY CHIMEL mistakenly announces it in his introduction. Crash goes under the ring to look for weapons - and gets surprised. We start out on the floor. Snow with a bodyscissors and facebuster on the STEEL ramp. Snow under the ring - oh no, I spy the bowling ball bag. Holly (oops) dropkicks a chair into Snow, Van Dam style. Snow comes back - cable choke. Crash delivers the garbage can lid to the head repeatedly. Leprechaunrana! Snow comes back with the garbage can. Cover on the ramp - referee "Blind" Mike Chioda in position - only 2. In the ring we go (?) Snow with a handicapped parking sign. Holly (oops) over the barricade and running off - Snow chases after him - and actually catches him! Snow appropriates a bin of popcorn from a vendor - and takes the bin to Crash's head - popcorn flying everywhere. Back into the ring. Snow with the broomstick - breaking it in half and then beating him with half of it. Snow puts him into the ropes, but Crash ducks the chair swing - gutshot, DDT onto the chair! Cover - 1, 2, no! To the corner - Snow blocks and puts Holly's head (oops) into the buckle. Trashcan lid - into the corner, followup clothesline. And here comes the bowling ball - well first Snow pulls out a bowling shirt and puts it in - the crowd applauds the appearance of the bowling ball - and there's the twopin strike. How did Snow know he was gonna get this match? Maybe *Foley* put the bowling ball under there - who can say. Snow brings the STEEL steps into the ring, but Crash manages a chair to the steps to Snow. Crash decides to walk off - suddenly he remembers he's forgotten his belt and walks back to get it. Hey, STEVE BLACKMAN lives! And he's walking down the ramp with referre "Blind" Chad Patton swinging some 'chuks. Crash takes a VICIOUS gutshot from the nunchuks, and one to the back. Leg is hooked - Patton counts - 1, 2, 3!! Holy crap! Ladies and gentlemen, we have a NEW WORLD Hardcore champion and a man we can ALL be proud of! (5:41) NOW GET HIM SOME WWF.COM LOVE!
Speaking of wwf.com, here's some hype for it
Moments Ago, Steve Blackman FINALLY got some well-deserved gold
Coming back to real time, we see the Mean Street Posse laying in wait with referee "Blind" Mike Sparks and weapons. Blackman heads to his car...swarm, swarm! But Blackman is ready - the ENTIRE Posse goes down - as if they ever had a chance. "You want some of this too, boy?" Sparks: "Uhh..no." That's right, baby, the Hardcore division just got a whole lot harder.
Here's a Special Video Look at Vince McMahon's word picture of his wife - and farewell speech from RAW.
Jericho asks the Dudley Boyz if they can imagine what it would be like to powerbomb Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley through a table. Buh-Buh Ray makes a face.
Yeah, more ads - right after this short bumper
And now, the Right Guard Xtreme Rewind! From RAW, Triple H Pedigrees Angle, but Jericho pulls him out of the pinfall, then hot shots H into Rock Bottom - and a pinfall (and #1 Contendership) loss.
D-GENERATION X (with Stephanie Ono) v. THOSE DAMN DUDLEYZ & CHRIS THURSDAY JERICHO - geez, we got like FIFTEEN minutes left in this show. Let Us Take You Back to King of the Ring, where Tori took a superbomb through a table despite having already separated her shoulder. What a trooper! By the way, the Dudleyz LOST that match. Triple H gives the "hold me back" treatment to Road Dogg & X-Pac as Jericho enters. Looks like D-Von will start for his team...Road Dogg tells Triple H to take it down a notch - HE'LL start. He runs at Dudley, who ducks and throws a right, right, right, right, into the ropes, reversed, hiptoss blocked, hiptoss by Dudley, in the corner, to the opposite corner, wacky jumpin' elbow. Tag to Buh-Buh Ray - into the ropes, double shoulderblock. Dudley covers - 2 from referee "Blind" Dave Hebner. Crowd chanting "table" as Dudley suplexes Dogg - elbowdrop gets 2. Dogg into the unfriendly corner, right, right, tag to D-Von, right. Right hand. Into the ropes, reversed, foot in the back by X-Pac as Hebner is distracted by Jericho - big boot by Dogg. Stomp. Kick, right, right, Dogg pulls Hebner away as Triple H and X-Pac doubleteam him. Tag to Triple H. Kick, kick, kick, stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp, Hebner finally manages to pull him off. X-Pac gets in a few as Hebner and H have a few words. X-Pac tagged in, kick, kick, Dudley tries to fight back but X-Pac takes him off the ropes, reversing the whip - spining heel kick. Tag to Dogg - into the ropes, double clothesline ducked, and D-Von hits one of his own! Tag to Buh-Buh Ray - clothesline for each man. Dogg ducks a clothesline but ends up feeling Uncle Slam. X-Pac over - whip reversed - big sidewalk slam. And there's a shot for Triple H on the outside as well. Scoop slam for Dogg, "headbutt to the graun" spot. X-Pac slammed - HE gets a second-rope headbutt to the gruan as well. Triple H FINALLY gets away from Hebner (who has managed to have his back to all this trying to keep H out of the action), only to eat a right hand from Jericho! Dudleyz in the ring, D-Von does his war dance and administers last rites as Buh-Buh Rays says loud enough to get a pop "D-Von - get the table!" Cole: "The table's getting a standing ovation!" While D-Von is outside getting the table, X-Pac sneaks back in and ...eats a punch from Buh-Buh Ray - oh well, it was a nice idea. It's all breaking down now - Triple H over to punch D-Von, Jericho over to punch Triple H. In the ring, X-Pac turns it with a heel kick off the ropes. Dogg with a surprise clothesline. Back to some semblance of a match. Shoulderblock by Dogg, tag to Triple H, who walks over to Jericho, drawing him in and bringing over Hebner so Dudley can be doubleteamed. Off the ropes, high knee. Cover - 2. Right hand, Dudley tries to punch back - X-Pac tagged in for the open show. Jericho in again - that doesn't help. X-Pac breaks into a gallop - there's a broncobuster to Dudley. Tag to Road Dogg. Snapmare takeover, Ultimo Dragon kick to the bac, rear chinlock. "X-Pac sucks" chant. Dudley to his feet - elbow, elbowing out, elbow, into the ropes, Dogg ducks the clothesline, left, left, left, juke, jive, right actually HITS, wiggly wobbly woomly kneedrop - D-Von breaks up the count at 2. Buh-Buh Ray put in the unfriendly corner, Triple H tagged in. Dudley comes back, right, right, left, right, left, right, into the ropes, H ducks the clothesline and hits the neckbreaker. Jericho breaks it up at 2. Buh-Buh Ray Dudley might want to give up on hitting that clothesline tonight. H manages to catch up to Jericho and slap him...bringing him in AGAIN and forcing Hebner to monopolize his time keep him out of the ring while a doubleteam rages behind him. Triple H to the sleeper. Dudley fading fast as the crowd comes alive at Jericho's behest. Arm falls once - arm falls twice - arm does not fall thrice. Shove into the ropes, Dudley with a sleeper of his own - Triple H quickly shoves out of it - clothesline is ducked - Buh-Buh Cutter! Cole called it, I'm shocked! Who will tag first? HOT TAG TO JERICHO! Road Dogg AND X-Pac come in - but *they're* not on fire, you see. Punch for X-Pac, kick for Road Dogg, off the ropes, gutshot, off the ropes with a bulldog. X-Pac gets a flying jalapeno after the clothesline fails. Into the ropes, clothesline ducked, but X-Pac accidentally hits Triple H following through! Jericho slaps on the Walls of Jericho, but Triple H manages to come in to break it up. Jericho tossed over the top rope - but the Dudleys are back in - double neckbreaker! Commentators calling it 3D, but no dice. Now they ARE setting up Triple H for 3D, but Buh-Buh Ray gets tripped up and pulled outside as Triple H holds the ropes. D-Von advances, but takes a gutshot - and a Pedigree. Triple H covers - Hebner says "wait a minute - Chris Jericho and Road Dogg were the legal men!" and does nothing. No, check that - he counts the pinfall. 1, 2, 3. (10:05) Buh-Buh Ray hits Triple H from behind in mid-pose. Stephanie slaps Buh-Buh Ray - that's, like, a bad idea. Stephanie assumes the position - but before Dudley can finish the job, X-Pac is in with a low blow. Jericho in and tossing X-Pac. H up on the apron to clothesline (a clothesline hits!) Dudley...Jericho to the corner, springing off with a dropkick that takes Triple H down through the table on the floor! This is the new intense ANGRY no goofy hairdo no fun mic time Jericho - warm up to him like an Undertaker powerbomb, baby. Replay of Jericho's springboard dropkick and H's careful landing. Jericho and the Dudley Boyz pose in the ring and we're out.
Despite all this manipulation and selling of things I don't wanna buy by the WWF, the fact that STEVE BLACKMAN won a title (adding to NO arena appearance by the Rock) automatically makes this the GREATEST SMACKDOWN! EVER!!
Back to a semi-normal schedule Tuesday - oh wait, Tuesday's a holiday, isn't it? Well, who knows WHEN you'll see me next. I'll get back to you.