WCW Thunder by E.C. Ostermeyer
Taped in the live oak swamps of Loozy-Anna last Tuesday.
Your hosts are Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay, and (oh joy!) Konnan.
From his cinderblock-walled office, Dark Side Commissioner Mike Sanders runs tonight's card for us.
Perfect Event's got Chavo and whoever he wants as a partner, while Sarge gets his crack at ol' "Stumbles" himself, Lex Luger.
We interrupt this blather for some higher quality blather, this time from CEO Ric Flair.
Flair gives Sanders his marching orders for the evening: Steiner and Sid's conduct on last night's Nitro was unforgivable, so let's just put the two big lunks in the ring and let 'em fight.
Sanders is to make sure Lance Storm sings Our National Anthem. Tonight. In the ring. In front of God and everybody.
Oh, and since you shouldn't develop any ring rust, Mike, you're wrestling DDP tonight as well.
Sanders appears to be in the throes of a conniption fit.
Opening film montage thingie.
Juvy. We hardly knew ye.
As for Vampiro, well, that's a matter of personal taste, really....
Still stuck in Bossier City, LA.
We get a shift change for two thirds of the announce team.
Konnan steps in for Stevie Ray, and Mike Tenay replaces Scott Hudson.
Poor Schiavone gets to pull another two hour stint, because Madden's been suspended for making goo-goo eyes at Kimberly.
I bet Tony's butt has gone to sleep.
Match #1: Knoble & Karagias d. Three Count d. The Jung Dragons (w/ Leia Meow), (Top-rope Superplex by Knoble and Karagias on Moore/Karagias pin, 5:32) Three Way Dance.
K&K are in the ring as 3 Count charges down the ramp to attack them. Pier Six with Shane Helms dragging Karagias outside and pounding on him, while Shannon Moore gets Knoble in an airplane spin. Helms dives back in the ring for the 3 Count version of the Dudley Death Drop. BWA-A-A-A-A-NG! Well-timed gong shot announces the arrival of the Jung Dragons, accompanied by Leia Meow...!
...who's gonna catch her death...
Yikes, what a costume!
Or lack thereof.
Oh, to be twenty again!
Uh, where was I?
Its Dragons v. Three Count, with the Dragons getting the upper hand pretty quick. Karagias hangs a leaping double clothesline from the top rope that slams both Dragons to the mat. Yang and Karagias go at it as Kaz Hayashi leaves the ring. Hangman's neckbreaker by Karagias takes Yang to the mat, allowing Karagias to "drive the Caddy" for a bit. Helms storms into the ring, only to get clobbered by Karagias, who's on fire right now. Tag to Knoble, and he & Karagias double-team Helms. Double-clothesline backfires on Karagias and Knoble, who clothesline each other when Helms ducks away.
Superkick by Helms nails Knoble, and Helms covers 1,2, no!
Three Count takes over double-team duties, with Mr. Knoble as the unwilling center of attention.
Moore tries for a front bulldog on Knoble, but Knoble blocks it and hits a belly-to-back suplex instead. Tag by Moore to Helms, Knoble tags in Kaz Hayashi, and Helms backs off real quick. Tilt-a-whirl backbreaker by Kaz, at high speed, no less. Gorilla slam on Moore by Kaz. Victory Roll by Knoble on Kaz, who rolls right out of it, and nails Knoble in the head with a buzzsaw kick. Kaz then nails Karagias right in the face with a spinning heel kick. As Kaz continues top smite the foe, Yang's busy dragging a ladder from underneath the ring.
Helms, meanwhile, has countered Hayashi with a powerslam, and then hammers Yang off the ring apron with a running elbow.
Moore grabs the ladder and pinions Kaz in the corner with it. Karagias tries to horn in on the action, only to get a "Bottoms Up" signature move from Moore, who then puts the ladder across the top ropes in the corner.
Knoble and Karagias drag Moore up on the ladder with them... and hit an AWESOME superplex off the ladder that lands all three men halfway across the ring. WOW! Knoble crawls over to cover Moore, but Karagias pushes him away and gets the pin.
Afterward, Karagias is "drivin' the Caddy," with Knoble fussing at him.
Jeez, this was one heckuva match!
Backstage, Kwee Wee and Paisley are checking out the TBS Hardcore Holiday Sweepstakes Prize, a candy-apple red Yamaha Kodiak ATV!
Kwee Wee says that HIS ATV would need just one thing:
No, a pink paint job.
Paisley says that only a REAL man could drive a pink ATV.
This causes Midajah to bust a gut laughing.
"PLEASE, like anything like THIS (the ATV) is gonna make Kwee Wee look like a tough guy!"
Paisley is understandably miffed, we get the beginnings of a cat fight, that Kwee Wee jumps into the middle of, hollering at Midajah, "Don't make me angry!"
Scott Steiner arrives,
and pounds Kwee Wee into floor sweepings, and then drops the ATV on him. Ouch!
WCW Security arrives for the obligatory pull-apart.
A pull-apart involving Scott Steiner and Kwee Wee. Who'd a thunk it?
Steiner's bellowing "NOBODY TOUCHES MY FREAK!" loud enough to be heard in Atlanta.
In the locker room, CEO Ric Flair's talking with Lance Storm and Team Canada. Flair's on about Storm keeping his promise. Storm says he doesn't know the words to The Star Spangled Banner," and he doesn't want to disrespect the USA's National Anthem. Flair says he can learn the words.
Storm says not in the time allotted.
Hacksaw Jim Duggan horns in, saying he'll teach Storm the words.
Storm got that "if looks could kill" face on, just for Duggan.
"Thank...You...Jim!" says Storm.
Don't mention it," grins Duggan, who starts off with the first five bars of the Anthem.
Using the wrong words.
And off key.
Konnan can't believe that Storm's been in this country four years and still doesn't know the National Anthem.
"He's from Canada," retorts Tenay, as if that explains everything.
Match #2: Perfect Event d. Chavo Guerrero Jr. ( double-team flapjack , 5:49)
This match was supposed to be Chavo "and a partner of his choice," remember? Looks like Chavo decided to go it alone.
Sean Stasiak's in control early on, with Chavo hitting occasional offensive moves, but not getting the chance to follow up on them. Backstage, the rest of the MIA's are watching the match. Back to the ring, where Chavo's landing chops across Stasiak's throat, and trash-talking him at the same time.
Cross-ring whip by Chavo gets reversed, and Chavo tumbles over the ropes, after Chuck Palumbo "lowered the drawbridge," as it were.
Palumbo whacks on Chavo some more before tossing him back in the ring to Stasiak.
Flying forearm smash off the top rope by Palumbo, and Chavo's down. As Palumbo stomps a mudhole in Chavo, backstage Cpl. Cajun tries to go help him, only to get sat back down by Gen'l Rection. In the ring, Palumbo's explaining things to the referee, while Stasiak's busy pummeling on Chavo. Towering vertical suplex by Palumbo gets reversed and Chavo clobbers palumbo with a flying shoulder block. Cover, 1,2, Stasiak breaks it up. Stasiak's in control, now, and he powerbombs Chavo, then covers for a 1,2, Chavo kicks out!
Cross-ring whip by Stasiak, but Chavo counters with a Thesz Press and fists of fury. Stasiak's had enough of that, reverses, and HE does the fists of fury routine.
Another shot of the MIA's stonily watching Chavo get his. As the referee protests, Chavo gets double-teamed big time by Perfect Event. Leaping drop kick by Palumbo drives Chavo into the turnbuckle stack. Stasiak goes for the pin, but pulls up on two. Looks like they aren't finished with Chavo yet. Backstage, Cajun's hollering about how Chavo's out there all alone. Rection tells him "he's alone because he chose to be alone. And YOU need to learn a lesson. So sit down, and pay attention!"
Back in the ring, Chavo gets a double-team flapjack, and Stasiak covers for the win.
The "Three Bear-zies" are informed that Sid Vicious is not in the arena, but is on the phone. Vicious, upon being informed by Tenay of CEO Ric Flair's decision, tells them to keep Steiner in the building, and he will be right over.
WCW Upcoming Events Calendar:
12/17 Washington DC (Starrcade PPV)
12/18 Richmond, VA (Nitro)
Tickets available for the following January dates on 12/16/2000:
1/8 St Paul, MN (Nitro)
1/15 Fort Wayne, IN (Nitro)
Backstage, Kwee Wee's being attended to by WCW Security (?)
Meng comes charging up.
"WHO DID THIS?" he bellows.
"Scott Steiner did it, Meng", wails Paisley.
"AAAAAaaaarrrroooooooooo" howls Meng as he stomps off, hollering for Steiner.
Also backstage, Marie's getting a cup of coffee. Bam Bam Bigelow asks her if a guy like him could go out with a girl like her?
Bam Bam smiles, and it's the scariest thing I've ever seen! "C'mon, whaddya think?"
Marie splats him with her coffee.
"HEY! Whatchoo do that for?" bellows Bigelow.
It's Big Vito.
You holler at my sister like that?"
POW! Right in the mouth. Reno joins in, and Bam Bam eats a packing case.
Mean Gene Okerlund's got the Sarge cornered. Gene thinks Lex Luger's underestimating the Sarge, and the Sarge agrees. "I've taken on guys bigger than Lex and made 'em puke and crawl on their knees into the parking lot..."
You get the idea, don't you?
Duggan's telling Lance Storm that he's gotta sing it like he means it. "O-o-hh say can you see-e-e-e...."
"Jose?" asks Storm, clearly perplexed.
"NO, not 'HO-ZAY', 'O say... can you see..."
"I can't do this, Jim."
"You can do it! Sing from the HEART!"
Aw jeez, here's ol' Lex Luger looking through the latest WCW Magazine. Jeez, he's looking at the pictures and MOVING HIS LIPS! How lame is that?
"Pulp Fiction's" first victim of the week is Scott Steiner, and we get a footage montage of his past conquests, dosed heavily with loud rock music.
Footage from Comedy Central's "The Man Show" has Bill Goldberg clad in his wrestling togs (and a yarmulke?) grabbing both hosts by the side of the neck and dragging them back into his locker room, all the while hollering about gefilte fish and kreplach.
Ric Flair's got an enraged Meng to calm down, and does so by giving him a shot at Steiner's Title tonight.
Uhhh, what about Sid Vicious, guys?
Back to the ring, where it's time for Lance Storm to sing for us all.
Storm foregoes getting serious, and makes a couple of statements about integrity. Great is the booing derived thereof.
Out comes the Cat with Ms. Jones. They appear to have brought picnic lunch along, complete with tablecloth, folding chairs, and picnic basket. "If you think I was gonna miss this, Lance Storm," says the Cat, " you out of your mind! Now get to singin' And if I don't like what I hear, I'm gonna kick ALL your asses! Get a-going!"
Storm tries the National Anthem. I didn't know the words went blah, blah, blah? Neither did the Cat, who tells Storm to do it right "or the next sound these folks hear will be my foot bangin' against your Canadian ass!"
Storm makes a hash of the second attempt. The Cat hollers at Jim Duggan to see if he knows the words to the National Anthem, and could he help out Lance Storm. Duggan's delighted to get the chance, but starts singing about three bars behind the music. And also off key by a flattened fifth.The Cat, disgusted, starts throwing some food at Team Canada. Storm, enraged, says that the Cat can fight Duggan.
This sets up
Match #3: The Cat (w/ Ms. Jones) d. Hacksaw Jim Duggan ( ,0:00)
Match opens with Duggan just walloping the tar out of the Cat, and backing him into a corner. Team Canada, specifically Prime Time Elix Skipper, grab the Cat by the ankles and flip him to the mat.
Duggan walks away, telling Lance Storm and Team Canada that he doesn't want to fight the Cat if Storm and Team Canada interfere with the match. Storm, from the ring apron, clotheslines the Cat, and tells Duggan to pin him. Duggn hollers that he's still got his pride, just as the Cat recovers and wallops him a good one.
Konnan asks Tenay and Tony if Duggan's having a change of heart?
Meantime, Prime Time Elix Skipper drags the Cat out of the ring, and he and Storm do the beat-down. Big "USA! USA!" chant from the crowd. Duggan bails out and pulls Skipper off the Cat. Storm shoves Duggan, and Duggan shoves back. The Cat nails Prime Time, and Duggan pounds the Cat, and rolls him back in the ring. The Cat gets the better of Duggan, and starts pounding on him. Duggan shoves him out of the ring, then rolls out himself and brings along his 2x4.
Duggan butts the Cat in the gut with the 2x4 then tosses him into the steel guardrail.
As he winds up for a home run swing (with the Cat's head as the baseball,) Duggan sees a lady fan's hastily-lettered sign at ringside:
"Hacksaw! Come back! We love you!"
Duggan stops, then pauses for a moment longer, wrestling with his feelings. He goes to nail the Cat again with the 2x4, but catches Storm in the gut with the backswing!
The crowd's cheering him like mad, as Major Gunns rushes to help Storm. Duggan tosses the Cat back in the ring, climbs in himself, and then starts taking the Maple Leaf jersey off! Crowd's going nuts at this point. The Cat nails him with a superkick, rolls Duggan up with a hooked left leg, and gets the pin.
Post-match, a furious Lance Storm rips the Canadian jersey completely off Duggan, then turns and nails the Cat with a ("loaded" tennis shoe?) superkick. Ms. Jones does the run-in and the cover-up to shield the Cat from more damage. As Team Canada leaves the ring, the Cat helps Duggan to his feet.
Over at the announcers' table, Konnan hollers "HO-O-O-O!" and the crowd echoes him back.
Duggan does his signature thumbs-up, bellowing "USA! USA!" and gets cheered even more.
Now, that's how to do an old-school "face turn', folks!
Oh, and a sign behind Duggan says "Where in the HELL is Elkton, MD?"
Inquiring minds want to know!
Sarge gets the "Pulp Fiction" treatment, as he trains a new crew of wrestling hopefuls at the WCW Power Plant.
Mean Gene's got Scott Steiner and Midajah. Okerlund fills in Steiner on what the consequences of his squashing Kwee Wee are. Flair booked him in a match with Meng tonight. In addition, Flair has declared "open season" between Steiner and Sid Vicious. Steiner says he can handle Meng, and that Sid's afraid to face him.
We see Lex Luger bludgeoning Bill Goldberg with a baseball bat. Looks like Sarge is on his own tonight.
Match #4: Lex Luger d. "Sarge" Dewayne Bruce (it says here...) ("Torture Rack"/submission, 1:38)
Hey, Luger's using his old, pre-"Call-me-Total-Package" nonsense, entrance music.
I bet he doesn't even know the difference.
As Luger ambles his way to the ring, Konnan and Co. are on the phone with Sid Vicious, who's apparently become stuck in traffic.
Though, as he begins asking for directions to the arena, you get the feeling he's not stuck, he's LOST!
Luger tries for a Test of Strength, but he's too tall for the fireplug-like Sarge. Luger then obligingly gets on his knees and tries again. Sarge ain't havin' THAT, and boots Luger in the gut. Sarge is busy stomping a mudhole in Luger, then bounces his head off the turnbuckles. Luger rolls out of the ring, Sarge makes a grab and gets a handful of Lex's golden tresses ("Dear Hair Club for Men..."!). Referee Charles Robinson drags Sarge off Luger, who uses the respite to pull a bat from under the ring. As Sarge lunges through the ropes to get at Luger, he gets waffled big time with the bat. Torture Rack/submission, that's it, folks.
Aw, jeez, would somebody take the mike away from Luger, PLEASE?
And does he have to SPIT when he talks?
We come back, just in time to see Luger leaving town as fast as his walker will let him.
DDP's doing his "stoutness" exercises. Er, pardon, his stretches and limber-ups. He's talking to Mr. Cameraman as if he was Mike Sanders.
"I been wrestling for nine years, so that makes me... near twice as old as you! By cracky! And I'm STILL gonna kick your ass from one end of this building to the other!"
Mean Gene's got Reno, Big Vito, and Marie backstage. Gene says that, after what they did to Bam Bam Bigelow, he's gone and hired Kronik, who's now after their butts.
Vito says that Bam Bam isn't EVER to mess "with our sister. And Kronik, you want to step up to the plate, you're gonna get the same thing. Doubled."
Reno says, in essence, "Yeah! What he said!"
Trainer Danny Young's busy checking Sarge for nasty ol' double vision and concussions and such. Sarge appears to have some stove-in ribs.
Crowbar and Daffney are taking a stroll. Crowbar's glum. He's a big sad sack over having to defend his Hardcore Title against Terry Funk at Starrcade. .
"I'm not gonna handle THAT order, Daff!"
"What?! Have you lost your edge, Crowbar?"
Well, what am I s'posed to do?"
"How about losing that cheesy hat? (hat goes flying) And these (sunglasses), and whatever this is, (fingers the "$" necklace), a-a-a-nd that shirt, a-a-nd... hmmm. How about some ripped-up jeans...hey, where's your monkey wrench?!"
"Pulp Fiction" does the Natural Born Thrillers.
Luger/Goldberg feud footage.
Scott Steiner/ Sid Vicious feud footage. Tony Schiavone: "Oh my God! They've killed Kenny- er, Oh my God, It's Sid!"
Mike Tenay recaps the story on the Kronik/Reno & Big Vito feud.
Match #5: Kronik d. Big Vito & Reno (w/ Marie), ("High Times" finisher on Reno/Adams makes the pin, 6:22)
Match starts with good back and forth action between Reno and Brian Adams.
Konnan says the Filthy Animals plan to send the Harris Boys and Jeff Jarrett "Back to Mayberry."
"That laxative thing you did to them last night..." says Tony.
"Wasn't it beautiful?" says Konnan.
"That had the Harris Brothers literally running for the hills," says Tony.
Gorilla press slam by Brian Adams on Reno, and a cover, 1,2, Reno kicks out.
Reno recovers, hits a power surge, and then scoopslams Brian Adams.
Reno stands Adams up in the corner, then pounds away at him. Adams reverses, and powerslams Reno. Adams tags in Bryan Clark. Cross-corner whip by Clark, and Reno eats a big elbow on his way back. Cover,1,2, No! Clark tosses Reno into his own corner, and motions for Vito to come out. Vito obliges, and Clark promptly stomps him into the mat. Cross-ring whip by Clark, but Vito reverses it, and nails Clark with a running clothesline. Cover by Vito,1,2, Clark kicks out.
Vito hits a suplex on Clark, then elbows Adams off the ring apron. Double-team on Clark by Reno and Vito in the Wrong Part of Town. Good tag changes, all legal by Reno & Vito. Cross-ring whip by Vito gets reversed, and Clark's got a Big Boot to the gut for Vito on the rebound. Cross-face slam by Clark, who then tosses Vito through the ropes to ringside.
After pummeling on Vito at ringside, Clark tossed him back in the ring, but pinioned him against the ropes while Brian Adams went to work on him inside the ring. Adams locks on a headlock.
While this is going on, we see Jeff Jarrett and the Harris Boys sneaking through the crowd behind the broadcast table. "El-Kabong" for Konnan from Jarrett. The Harris Boys pile in, and we've got a beat-down on Konnan in the booth.
Tony says that the "Streetfight" appears to have started right now.
Bak ion the ring, Vito and Adams are going at it. Adams takes control with a rake to the eyes. Adams with a side-suplex on Vito, and a cover, 1,2, no!
Two referees come out and help Konnan to the back. Clark tags in, and he and Vito run headlong into each other, dropping both to the mat. It's a race to see who tags first, which Clark wins a split second before Vito tags Reno. Adams charges after Reno, only to get a big boot to the gut, and as shivering forearm shot that drops him to the mat. Clark tries for the save, only to get a superkick in the chops from Reno. Headbutt by Adams staggers Reno, as Clark and Vito brawl in Vito's corner. Reno tries for the "Roll of the Dice" finisher on Adams, but Clark breaks it up, and together, Kronik hits Reno with their "High Times" finisher for the pin and the win.
Post-match, Kronik added additional punishment to Reno. Vito makes the save with the pool cue, but Clark stopped him and took the stick away from him. Kronik then knocked Vito around before Every WCW Security Guy in the World piled into the ring to break up the fracas.
Backstage, Mike Sanders is telling the Natural Born Thrillers that they make have to resort ot some "drastic measures."
"I like drastic measures," says Sean O'Haire, with a big grin on his face.
This week's "Thunder Shoot Interview" is a treat.
Mike Tenay interviews Shane "Franchise" Douglas. Film montage depicts Douglas' recent exploits in WCW.
We learn that:
1) Douglas has been in the business more than 20 years.
2) He was trained at Dominic DiNucci's wrestling school.
3) Though he and Ric flair have not seen eye to eye, Douglas followed Flair's advice and joined WCW because WCW is the premiere wrestling organization.
4) Every great wrestler is performing in WCW, and Douglas wants to confront those wrestlers to prove he's the best.
5) Though no one else in the business has as many skeletons in their closet as he does, he will confront those skeletons and prove he's the best.
6) Douglas sees the World Title as his goal, and he devotes each day to achieving that goal. "I was bred to wear that Title belt around my waist!" says Douglas.
7) Though he often referred to Torrie Wilson as his "meal ticket", she was much more than that, being his confidant, being there for him at all times, and
8) that the so-called "accident" Torrie suffered was no accident at all; it was pre-determined "in the back," to make sure Douglas missed his chance at the US Title. (I'm sure Ms. Wilson appreciates the sympathy, Franchise!)
9) Douglas is focused on his victory over Gen'l. Rection at Starrcade. His winning of the US Title is his only goal, "at this time." Douglas will then use the US Title as a stepping stone towards winning the WCW World Title.
Mr. Cameraman spots DDP getting a drink. In the background, we see Chuck Palumbo and Mark Jindrak of the NBT's peeking through the curtains. DDP swills the water around in his mouth and heads for the ring. He spits the water at Mr. Cameraman, drenching the lens. Behind him, the NBT's are seen sneaking into DDP's dressing room.
We catch a glimpse of the NBT's leaving DDP's dressing room, with smiles on their faces. Mr. Cameraman pushes open DDP's door... and spots Kevin Nash unconscious on the floor with a lot of debris on top of him.
Match #6: Diamond Dallas Page d. Mike Sanders (NBT's Interference/DQ, 3:20).
Footage from Nitro (i.e. earlier in the evening shows DDP and ol' Big Sexy getting clobbered by the NBT's. Nash's right knee takes a pounding at the hands of Sean O'Haire and Mark Jindrak.
We find out that DDP and wife Kimberley will be at the Mall of Georgia reading Christmas stories. Wonder if they'll read Mick Foley's new Christmas book?
Sign in crowd: "Natural Born Thirillers: You're Gonna Feel The BANG!!"
Schiavone gives the update on Konnan from trainer Danny Young, (who ought to be getting his ASCAP card soon, the number of times he's been on camera this week). Young has cleared Konnan to wrestle at Starrcade.
DDP and Sanders exchange pleasantries, spit samples, slaps, and then punches to get the match started.
DDP starts off by getting a wrestling clinic going, with Mike Sanders as the unwilling participant. Punch, slap, slap, chop, rips off Sanders' shirt and tosses him in the corner for some more fun. Cross-corner whip by DDP gets reversed, but DDP still nails Sanders with a running lariat. Paintbrush slap by DDP is followed up with a clothesline over the top rope to the floor at ringside. Sanders eats a whole lot of steel guardrail. Cuppa "something" smashed in Sanders' face by DDP, who then bounces Sanders' noggin off the announcers' table.
Tenay says that the broadcast position's been like a combat zone this week. "Isn't it always?" retorts Tony.
Page takes Sanders on a trip around the ringside area, with the crowd hollering "DDP! DDP! DDP!"
We get another call from Sid Vicious, who's STILL driving around and STILL lost! Wasn't this guy just IN THE ARENA earlier?
Must be asking the locals for directions.
The locals, taking one look at Sid, probably scream, and run for their lives.
Meanwhile, Sanders has taken control of the match, throwing DDP into a corner and stomping on his "in-seam." Ouch! Sanders with the 'mudhole stomp", and then takes time out to jaw with a fan at ringside. Cross-corner whip by Sanders gets reversed. DDP hits a power surge, and starts chopping away. Gut-wrench powerbomb splatters Sanders all over the mat. Sign o' the Diamond Cutter, and here it comes, with a spin-around wind-up.
Cover by DDP on Sanders...
Whoops, here's Jindrak & O'Haire in to break up the pin attempt.
Diamond Cutter for Jindrak.
O'Haire lands a superkick.
Jawbreaker for O'Haire.
Slugfest between DDP and O'Haire. DDP whips O'Haire into the corner, and nails him with an elbow drop.
Chuck Palumbo shows up and starts stomping on DDP. Palumbo positions DDP, and O'Haire hits the Sean-ton Bomb off the top turnbuckle. Palumbo drags what's left of Mike Sanders across DDP's carcass, but referee Billy Silverman has already thrown the match out. That's okay, Palumbo obligingly counts the pinfall for Sanders.
Match #7: Scott Steiner (w/ Midajah) d. Meng ( w/Paisley [but no "Afro", doggone it!]) ("Steiner Recliner"/submission, 5:42)
Tony shills for the WCW "Backstage Assault" videogame as Meng and Paisley arrive at ringside.
Steiner and Midajah have some fun with the fans as they make their entrance. Midajah points at a fan's sign that offends her, and Steiner obligingly rips it to shreds, then grwls menacingly at the sign's owner.
Shot of some enthusiastic fans at ringside who are hollering for Steiner to "bring some of that to me, man!"
Steiner tries two mikes before finding one that works.
He then bellows that Ric Flair's plans to take the belt away from him are falling apart, and that Sid Vicious is "to afraid" to face him.
Meng's had enough of Steiner's noise, and chops that chain-link fence right off Steiner's noggin. Meng pounds away on Steiner, driving him into the corner, and let the stomping commence. Cross-ring whip by Meng, Steiner tries a boot in the gut, Meng no-sells it big time, and nails Steiner with a vicious-looking backbreaker. Lateral press by Meng, cover,1,2, Steiner gets a shoulder up. Elbow drop by Meng, and Steiner bails out of the ring. Steiner anglrily jaws with the at ringside fans for a bit, and the fans are giving it back volt for volt. Midajah has to get Steiner's attention focused on the match, before referee "Slick" Johnson counts him out.
Back in the ring, and a collar and elbow tie-up, then a Steiner attempt at a scoopslam, which Meng escapes via float-over, then nailing a running elbow to Steiner's forehead.
Cross-ring whip by Meng, but Steiner ducks, and hits a neat hangman's neckbreaker. Bicep-kiss elbow drop on Meng, followed by a quick set of 10 pushups. After cussing out the fans some more, Steiner starts punching and kicking on Meng. A set-up for a 'Franken-Steiner" gets blocked by a couple of Meng headbutts, followed by a leaping clothesline off the middle turnbuckle. Meng back up and splatters Steiner with a Giant (and I do mean GIANT) Splash off the middle rope. Cover by Meng, 1,2, Steiner kicks out. Snap Jaw-Buster by Steiner gets a superkick riposte from Meng, and down goes Steiner. Meng with punches (and chops!) in bunches, then a cross-corner whip into the turnbuckles. The charge by Meng gets a big Steiner boot to the face, followed by a Steiner belly-to-belly suplex, and Jeez Lou-weeze, the WHOLE RING SHOOK with the impact!
Lateral press by Steiner, 1,2, Meng gets the left shoulder up! Steiner tosses Meng through the ropes to the floor at ringside, and we get some brawling back and forth before Meng tosses Steiner hard into the steel guardrail. Midajah swarms all over Meng's back. Meng shrugs her off with a snap body drop. Clothesline from Steiner on Meng, as Paisley takes the opportunity to get in some serious pounding on Midajah.
All we need is Tony hollering "Catfight! Catfight!" like Joey Styles.
Steiner watches the catfight for a bit, before hauling Paisley off Midajah and telling her to get lost. Which Paisley does, and at high speed.
As Steiner rolls Meng back into the ring, Tenay is hollering for "anyone in the back...have we seen Sid Vicious yet?!"
Cross-corner whip by Steiner, followed by a flying elbow attempt that Meng ducks.
Meng with a boot to Steiner's breadbasket...
TONGAN DEATH GRIP!
Hey, we could have a new champion here if...!
Holy cow, Steiner broke the Tongan Death Grip!
T-Bone suplex by Steiner!
Meng gets the Steiner Recliner...
...as (finally!) Sid Vicious' music starts up.
Meng resists the Steiner Recliner as long as he can, and then taps out.
Steiner sees Sid on the ramp.
Sid motions for Steiner to join him on the ramp,
"...and AWAY WE GO!" hollers Mike Tenay.
Sid's just all over Steiner with punches and kicks, and whips into the steel guardrail. Sid's choking Steiner on the steel guardrail, then tosses him back into the ring. Steiner tries for some offense, but gets cross-ring whipped into a Big Sid Boot. Sid ducks a weak clothesline attempt by Steiner. Sid sets for the chokeslam, asks Steiner (to his face!), "Ready?", and then craters the ring with him.
Off comes the shirt, as Tony's hollering that "The original madman is LOOSE! What will happen on Starrcade, this Sunday night??!!"
Gee, I don't know, Tony. Guess we all will have to buy the PPV, hah?
Closing credits on a pretty good show, one that kept all the story arcs humming along to the PPV, and kept me interested. A much better show than this week's Nitro, and WAY better than the pablum WCW was offering us here just five months ago.
Way to go, guys.
Where's my wallet?
See you next week.
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