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/19 August 1999
WCW Thunder

19.8.99

Guest columnist: Greg Conley
Main

BLAH

We start off the show with Tenay and Larry babbling about the great names of Texas, "Mr 61-0" Sid, and the unbelievable match between Kevin Nash and Hulk Hogan. What workrate!

1) Psychosis vs. Silver King- Silver King comes out like a raving lunatic. My sign idea if I ever go to a WCW show- Repo Man Stole Silver King's Sanity. Yes! He'll be facing Psychosis. To start off the match Silver King misses a double leg dive and hits a nice swinging DDT. King tries another double leg dive in the corner but ends up getting hung in the ropes and Psychosis nails him with a springboard legdrop. He nails him with a dropkick followed by a spin kick that sends Silver King to the outside. Psychosis then nails one of his signature suicide dive moves. After this they get back in the ring and the psycho one has the advantage. Nice tilt-a-whirl backbreaker and gets a two count. King almost knocks Billy Silverman out. King throws Psychosis into the ropes and Psychosis gets a sunset flip in for a two. Right when Psychosis got up he nailed him with a nice running clothesline. He scoop slams him and devlivers a front kick to the side of the head and does a dance. Silver King misses a double springboard moonsault and Psychosis goes to the top rope and Sid comes out. F--K YOU WCW! Psychosis leaps off the top turnbuckle and Sid powerbombs him and the bell rings (**, 3:39). He gives a powerbomb to poor Silver King also. Sid blahs and blahs incoherently about why he does this and that when his streak reaches 76 he's going to shake all over. He then said that he heard his name in the same sentence as Babe Ruth. My sentence: "I wish Babe Ruth would hit Sid hard with a bat." My guess is as good as yours if it's a no-content or a DQ on Silver King.

2) Al Greene vs. Shane Douglas- Shane Douglas comes out to Dean Malenko's music. I guess they haven't gained the rights to "Perfect Strangers" yet. They both play the crowd to start and they exchange wristlocks and hammerlocks. Douglas gets put into the corner by Al and pounds on him. He chokes Shane and throws him into the corner. As he charged in Shane got a boot up. Shane nails a nice Rolling Snap Mare and executes a vertical suplex. Chinlock on the ropes by Shane and drops Greene's throat on the ropes. Greene surprises Douglas by tossing him to the floor. Shane reverses a rail whip and they fight back to the inside on the ring. Douglas nails Greene with a flying crossbody block for a two and snapmares him into a chinlock. Greene gets a few moves in but Shane nails with a running clothesline. Greene gets advantage again by whipping Douglas into the corner and avalanching him. Greene goes for a vertical suplex but Douglas blocks it and nails a gutbuster which he follows up the Pittsburgh Plunge for the 1-2-3 (4:30, *). Douglas is really starting to slack off in his work ethic. I usually love the guy, but his constant state of being lazy in the ring is annoying me.

Gene Okerlund interviews Rick Steiner- Oh my lucky stars, Rick Steiner. Members of The Revolution want a shot at his title and Gene asks him about it. Steiner does his usual stuff calling them little girls and saying he'll beat their mothers to. Steiner says no one can out-think, out-smart, or out-wrestle him. I can think of probably 300 wrestler that can out-think and out-smart him. He says he's going to take their heads off and offers a challenge to any of them. Blah....

Promo for Coach "Buzz" Stern- This was a real bad promo as Stern (Glacier) is in a coaching gimmick and he goes over rules and gives the three Ss. Sweat, Sacrifice, equals success. Ugh...

3) Bobby Blaze, Adrian Byrd and Dave Burkhead vs. Steve Regal, David Taylor and Chris Adams- Whoo, the jobber team isn't used to big crowds. Regal and Burkhead start the match with Regal beating on Burkhead. He quickly tags out to Dave Taylor who nails him with an European Uppercut which is followed by a vertical suplex. Tag out to Chris Adams. Taylor comes in and makes the jobbers try to come in the ring as Adams and Regal double team Dave Burkhead. Burkhead ends up getting a hold of Chris's leg just ends up getting enziguried out of the ring where Taylor beats on Burkhead with the Union Jack (Flag). Back in the ring Adams hits a backdrop suplex and tags out to Steven Regal. He nails him with some European Uppercuts and eventually Blaze makes a tag. Regal beats on Bobby to and whips him off the ropes and Blaze goes for a sunset flip. Regal holds his hands out and Adams and Taylor hold on but Charles Robinson kicks their hands off and Regal goes down and Blaze gets a 2 count. Taylor and Adrian Byrd get tagged in. And by looking at it either Adrian is very short or Taylor is very tall because Taylor hovers over Adrian. Taylor whips him off the ropes and nails what else? European Uppercuts. Scoop slam by Tayloy and he distracts Charles Robinson allowing a double team to happen. Tag out to Adams who executes a snap mare and a kneedrop and then tags out to Regal. Adams holds Adrian and Regal kicks him and follows it up with a European Uppercut. Regal knee chokes him and tags out to Taylor. Taylor brings him into the corner and nails the uppercuts and boot chokes him. Tag to Adams as the jobbers distract the ref even more and they punish Adrian some more. Legdrop by Adams and tags out to Taylor. Gutwrench slam by Taylor for two as Bobby makes the save. On the outside Byrd is getting his rear kicked and then Sid and Rick Steiner make their way out to the ring and Sid destroys the jobbers as the Europeans take off having it be a DQ win for the jobbers (6:46, * 3/4). Sid makes Charles count three as he pins Burkhead and Adrian. Steiner executes a belly-to-belly suplex on Blaze. Sid takes the mic and blahs and blahs. Sid powerbombs Burkhead as Rick blahs and blahs on the mic. Sid makes Charles count 1-2-3 again. Sid then powerbombs Blaze again and Charles counts. Rick compares the bodies to Sting, Goldberg, and Hogan. Ugh, what a dumbass segment.

The Revolution in for an interview- Shane asks the crowd if they agree if it's time for a change in WCW. You can guess what the crowd does. Douglas says people in the back are shaking in their boots over The Revolution. Douglas points to his members one by one and says they're the real deal. Saturn takes the mic and says he's going to take the challenge and that he's going to beat him, not bite him. Saturn- "Out with evolution, in with revolution." What the hell does evolution mean anyway?

4) Cruiserweight Title Match- Lenny "Without the Lane" (w/Lodi) vs. Rey Misterio Jr.- Signs- Lenny's All Over Me, About My Diet, I've got 2 much free time of my hands, and We Luv Big Horns. Lenny grabs the mic- "Well hello there." Rey snatches the mic from him and tells him that he was whining about wanting another title shot after what happened during their match on Nitro. Rey tells Lenny to have his boyfriend go back to the funny farm and Johnny Boone sends Lodi to the back. Rey attacks Lenny to start the match. I guess he learned that in the hood. Rey gets out of a slam attempt and goes behind lenny. Lenny shakes his booty and Rey nails him. Rey comes off the ropes with a nice headscissors takeover which sends Lenny to the outside of the ring where Rey connects with a suicide dive. As Lenny gets back in Rey goes for a Springboard but Lenny dropkicks him in the gut and gets a two count. Lenny whips Rey in who goes for a body-scissors but Lenny nails him with a brutal looking face-first powerbomb for a near fall. Lenny hits a standing shoulderbreaker and a slam for a two count. Lenny beats on Rey in the corner and moves around cocky. Rey gets a sunset flip in for a 2 count. Lenny nails Rey with a running lariat and puts Rey in a facelock on the bottom rope. Rey gets a comeback but an eyerake stops it. Lenny whips Rey into the corner hard and covers for two. Lenny picks Rey up for a fireman's carry and airplane spins him then slams him down. Lenny acts dizzy and then covers for a two count. Lenny throws Rey to the outside of the ring and sends Rey into the apron. They both go back in and Lenny executes and a scoop slam and a legdrop for a two count. Rey gets under Lenny and nails an atomic drop. Lenny goes to the top rope but gets wobbly and ends up jumping off and his crotch landing on Rey's knee. Lodi's back to cheer on his man and comes into the ring. Lodi hits Lenny instead of Rey and Lenny has Lodi's crotch in his face (Can't describe it, you have to see it). Lenny and Lodi make sure they're okay Rey hits a dropkick on Lenny from behind. Lenny tries a leg dive but hits the ropes and Rey executes a Bronco Buster on them. Lenny goes outside and Rey nails him with a legdrop. Lodi tries to interfeare but meets the safety rail for his troubles. Off the ropes, Lenny tries a leg dive, but hits the ropes. Rey drop toe-holds Lodi who falls head first into Lenny's crotch. Ouch. Back in Rey runs into Lenny's boot in the corner and Lenny hits what I believe was the Memory Lane (Full Nelson faceslam) for a two count. Rey rolls up Lenny and Lodi gets on the apron. Lenny kicks Rey into Lodi and Lenny then rolls-up Rey for the win! YES!!!! Finally Lenny Lane gets the Cruiserweight Title! Great match! (7:03, ***)

5) WCW Tag Team Titles Match- Harlem Heat vs. Scott Norton/Horace- Stevie Ray gives us those odd looks from his eyes. Norton shoves Booker T who responds with a slap and a spin kick. He tries an armbar but Norton picks him up and slams him with ease. Booker gets elbowed to the mat and after Norton misses a charge Booker T scoop slams Norton twice. Stevie Ray gets tagged in and he cleans house as we go to break. As we come back Horace suplexes Booker for a two count. Horace tries to run Booker T into Norton's big boot but Booker stops him and nails an axe kick. Norton doesen't take to well of it and nails him with a running clothesline. Stevie Ray argues Nick Patrick as Horace beats on Booker T on the outside of the ring. Norton brings Booker T back in the ring and executes a short-arm clothesline and elbowdrops him. Norton nails him with a double cross chop and tags out to Hogan. Horace chops him and whips Booker T into the corner. Horace charges and Booker jumps up and nails a sunset flip for a near fall. Horace rakes Booker's face and tags out to big Scott Norton. Norton nails him with a shoulderblock and cross-corner whips him and charges him. Norton takes to Horace and Booker T gets a short lived comeback but Horace put an end to it with a rake to the eys. Horace knees Booker a few times and then whips him into the ropes, and cross bodyblocks him. Horace tags to Norton and goes for a powerbomb but Booker T slips out of it and rolls him up for a two count. Norton nails him with a double sledge to his back as Horace comes in and they miss a double clothesline and Booker T nails them both with a flying forearm. He tags out to the fruit booty and he beats on them both. Powerslam by Stevie. Horace and Stevie fight on the inside while Norton and Booker T fight on the outside. Horace gans advantage with a side slam and a body splash that had Stevie Ray down for the count but Patrick was trying to get Booker T and Horace to stop brawling. As Horace whips Stevie into the ropes Booker T comes off the top rope with a Missle Dropkick out of nowhere for the win (11:09, *1/2).

Gene interviews The First Family- The First Family (All of it) come out to no reaction. Hart says they have only one goal and that's to take the tag team gold away from Harlem Heat. Jerry Flynn insults Mean Gene which gives him one more point in my book and says they need no introduction. Hugh Morrus acts like...Hugh Morrus and challenges Harlem Heat. Barbarian says something in one of his languages that sounded like "How you say, we will eat your lads." Watch out kids! Knobbs lays down a challenge for him and Hugh Morrus to fight Harlem Heat on next weeks show. Blah....

6) WCW TV Title Match- Rick Steiner vs. Saturn- Some water flies by Steiner and he yells at a security guard telling him to get the fan. Yep Rick, I bet that water really pisses you off. Steiner babbles and asks Saturn where his boys are. Steiner tells us to shut up. That's not going to work. Texas Rednecks don't listen. Steiner lands some stiff shots to start the match and nails him with a Steinerline. Steiner chokes Saturn in the ropes and whips him off the ropes. Saturn ducked a clothesline and hit a crossbody lcock from the second rope and then nailed an atomic drop and a clothesline and Steiner goes to the outside. Steiner comes back in and Saturn whips him into the corner and Saturn ends up running right into the corner and Steiner picks him up and drives hangs Saturn on the turnbuckles. Steiner chokes him again and tosses him to the outside. Rick sends Saturn into the tail and into the steel steps as we go to a commercial... As we come back Steiner is dominatin and rakes Saturn's face. Rick tries to hit Saturn's head on the turnbuckle but Saturn counters. His comeback didn't last long when Steiner hit a DDT on Saturn and gets a two count. Steiner applies a standing surfboard and Sagturn is able to get up. He comes off the ropes with a nice neckbreaker. He tries a whip but Steiner reverses it and Saturn hits a side kick and nails him with a T-Bone for a two count. Saturn gets the famous 10 punches in the corner and Sid makes his way out. Saturn goes to top rope and Sid pushes him off right into a Steiner belly-to-belly suplex for the DQ (8:05, * 1/2/). Steiner beats on Saturn for a second until Benoit makes the save. They battle each other on the mic until they challenge them to a tag match on next weeks show. Sid accepts and Steiner says Saturn couldn't get it done and Steiner says they don't have a chance. Sid and Steiner try to come in the ring but Benoit and Saturn prevent it. Benoit: "Out with the evolution, in with the revolution." And we leave.

The Good- Lenny Lane winning the Cruiserweight Title
The Bad- The First Family has no mic skills, Sid should have interupted the matches after they were done.
The Ugly- The Barbarian's speaking voice, and for the second week in a row, Rick Steiner.

Greg Conley
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Guest column text copyright (C) 1999 by the individual author and used with permission