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THAT'S *MY* GARBAGE
HEY ASSHOLE
Hello! Let's jump right in!
AHOMOSEZWHAT:
The past week has sure been a controversial week of controversy, has it not?
I talked about Billy and Chuck's wedding last week, but now having seen it
I'll take this brief opportunity to say that I thought it ruled. I'm off
spoilers so I had no idea what was gonna happen. Bischoff unmasking I never
saw coming. Wowie wow wow. He's wicked awesome.
The whole thing came off about as inoffensive as it could have been, I
think. But now after supporting the happy couple and even getting them a
touching wedding gift, GLADD is all pissy about it. Basically after saying
what they did about the guys being positive portrayals of homosexuals or
whatever, which was fairly dumb to begin with, it seems they're mad that
Billy and Chuck weren't actually gay. It sounds like they actually expected
the wedding to happen and for that to be it, which everyone knows isn't
gonna happen on a wrestling show be the couple gay or straight.
And how about those lesbians! A lot of people sure seemed upset by this
one. If you were, that's cool, but I just didn't see what the big deal
about it was. They trotted out two girls to show off their naughty parts
and get the crowd to hoot and holler. Is it really that different than
Stacy and Terri pillow fighting in lingerie the week before with all the
shots of Stacy bent over in her panties? Or Stacy and Trish in bikinis
rolling in the mud? It's all serving the same purpose, but this outraged
far more people and it surprised me.
Granted, the HLA segment went farther than the other examples with the girls
kissing and whatnot... although they didn't actually show us their lips
touching. But even if they did kiss, who hasn't seen chicks kissing
somewhere before? ECW did the same thing like 6 years ago. That's a long
time.
Maybe people were more upset by the attack at the end. I kinda figured that
it'd be a 3 Minutes segment, so maybe I was just expecting it. It's not
like they've never attacked women before. But... whatever. I'm not saying
the segment was any good, just that I don't quite get all the outrage over
it. But you know what DID offend me was having Bischoff out there the whole
time to commentate on it. Next time just let 'em GET IT ON!
PPV:
WWE Unforgiven is this Sunday! Here's what we know of the card thus
far:
- Brock Lesnar vs. The Undertaker - WWE Championship match
- Triple H vs. Rob Van Dam - World Heavyweight Title match
- Chris Jericho vs. Ric Flair - Intercontinental Title match
- Chris Benoit vs. Kurt Angle
- Booker T, Goldust, Kane, Bubba Ray Dudley vs. The UnAmericans - 8-man
tag
- Rosie & Jamal vs. Billy & Chuck - HLA/Kiss My Ass interpromotional match
Other than Brock winning I really have no idea what will happen in any of
these matches. The tag match seems like a no-brainer in that surely
Stephanie will not be doing any hot lesbian action... but then again, if
Bischoff has to join the Stephanie McMahon Kiss My Ass Club, wouldn't she
have to bare her booty like Vince used to? I don't see that happening,
either. And at least something could happen to prevent her from taking part
in HLA. And with all their build-up, should the Island Boys lose their
first match? I gotta go with Team Eric.
The UnAmericans losing sounds fine with me. Hopefully the crowd is extra
hot to make up for Benoit/Angle being a heel/heel contest, as those matches
rarely get the crowd support they need. I'll pick Benoit cause he has Eddie
to help him. I have no idea what they're up to with Ric Flair, but Jericho
seems like the safe choice in that one.
RVD losing the I/C belt certainly seems like the setup for him to win at the
PPV, but... I dunno. What's RVD gonna do as world champion? Who's there
for him to fight? Hopefully they have answers for this if he wins. Shawn
Michaels and his sledgehammer haven't been seen since he promised revenge on
HHH, so that could possibly factor into this one.
Speaking of HHH, I haven't seen this pointed out much if at all, so have you
noticed what a wiener he is all of a sudden? Remember the guy with the
leather/denim jacket and the wet hair and the facial gruff for a beard who'd
stomp down and bust heads? I think he's dead. Now in his place there's
this clean-shaven guy in polo shirts and khakis with a pretty ponytail and a
shiny gold watch. Look at his "ZOINKS! (gulp)" reaction when RVD won the
#1 contender match. Aside from Mick Foley turning into Cactus Jack,
promising to rip Hunter's flesh from his body, when has he ever had that
sort of reaction to anything?
And how about costing RVD the I/C title by getting his own ass kicked? No
Pedigree or sledgehammer shot while the ref was down, RVD was so busy
beating up HHH that Jericho took advantage of it. I have no idea how this
relates to the PPV match, but I'd be interested in knowing why they decided
to make such a change.
Brock/Taker is probably the only forgone conclusion. I'm curious to see who
Brock will fight next, cause there's not really an established star left on
Smackdown's roster. After Taker we could get to see things like Edge in PPV
world title matches. How crazy!
TNA:
They're back on Wednesday, yep they are. Here's the line-up:
- The Truth vs. Jerry Lynn (X Division champion) - NWA World Title match
- Gauntlet For The Gold for NWA Tag Team Titles:
- Scott Hall & Syxx-Pac
- The SAT's
- The Flying Elvises
- Chris Harris & James Storm
- The Hot Shots
- Slash & Kobain
- Ron Harris & Brian Lee
- AND MORE!
- AJ Styles vs. Kid Kash
- Bruce defends the Miss TNA crown
- Bob Armstrong unmasks the Bullet
- Hermie Sadler returns!
- AN APPEARANCE BY SCREECH!!!
I can hardly wait!
THE NEWS:
Let's check it! Credit to Wade.
NEWS FROM WORLD WRESTLING
ENTERTAINMENT:
- TNN issued a statement saying they took serious issue with the content of
the last week's Raw. USA used to make similar statements when WWE pushed
the envelope and it's always been suspected that statements like these are
P.R. moves for the network while privately they've approved of the stunts.
The outrage of TSN, though, is considered genuine within the TV industry.
They heavily edited the HLA segment.
- It'll be interesting to see which title match, Brock/Taker or RVD/HHH,
ends up as the last match at Unforgiven. The Raw match seems more likely to
get the final spot if only because it seems unlikely that Michael Cole &
Tazz would call two straight PPV main events. (Yeah, 'cause Ross and Lawler have NEVER called two straight PPV main events. <rolls eyes> - CRZ) Also, it's more likely that
RVD will beat Hunter than it is that Taker would beat Brock, so all things
equal WWE likes a babyface victory ending the show.
- All indications lately are that Steve Austin has no intention of returning
to WWE rings. Apparently "all indications" are something JR said about it
in the Ross Report. There's the possibility that Austin and Goldberg could
promote a match with each other without any promotional backing. Or maybe
they could even star their own company. Austin would have to get out of his
WWE contract first, though.
- Test and Christian were asked to cut their hair short like Lance Storm.
Whoever it was in management who passed that along to them made the comment
that "long hair is out", which made someone joke as to when HHH and Nash
would be told. What about Edge, his career is over! Anyway, Test and
Christian didn't like the idea and I'm guessing they got out of it since
they still have long hair.
- One veteran of the wrestling scene says the best advice to guys getting
WWE tryouts is to work out in the ring ahead of time since the company's
rings are bigger than the average indy ring. The biggest problem indy guys
run into, says this guy, is running the ropes due to the difference in
size.
- Kanyon is considering tweaking his in-ring style to compensate for his
shoulder injury.
- Hulk Hogan was on Bubba the Love Sponge and acted as if he and WWE are the
best of friends, but sources say Hogan is frustrated and is still having
problems with his back. Bubba asked about rumors that Randy Savage would
come back to WWE, to which Hulk said "I hope not, I hate that son of a
bitch."
- Paul Heyman has taken Nidia under his wing. He's known for having regular
chat sessions with her, where he updates her on her character's direction
and gives her pointers on how to portray her character. Co-workers say
Nidia isn't showing signs of letting her push go to her head.
- The writers have talked about turning Brock because of the babyface
reactions he's been getting lately, especially at house shows, but Heyman is
strongly against it. Heyman critics say he doesn't want Brock to turn
because that could mean less on-air time for Paul. Heyman and Brock have
become very tight behind the scenes and are being referred to together in
the Austin/JR type way.
- Sources say WWE isn't interested in Steve Corino as a wrestler or
announcer because of all the scarring on his forehead due to excessive
blading.
- Sources keep saying that WWE is interested in Malice.
- Several former WCW wrestlers are planning to sue AOL/TW based on unpaid
licensing issues. Nash has been very vocal about the issue and will likely
spearhead the movement.
- Jericho, who officially re-upped for 3 more years a few weeks back, tried
out for the remake of the Rocky Horror Picture Show.
- The Rock and Britney Spears will make cameos in a movie for ABC Family.
Test and Goldberg were on an episode of "Kim Possible" on Disney.
- Triple H did an interview and talked about Angle, Rock, and Taker all
being awesome. He doesn't drink, his favorite sign is still the Triumph
"HHH is that damn good... for me to poop on" one, and the most annoying
thing about wrestling fans is when they approach him while he's eating or
taking a pee.
- WWE sources say that, despite what he's told people and what has been
reported, Scott Steiner has not passed any WWE sponsored physicals. WWE
isn't interested in Steiner at this time due to health "and other" concerns.
Steiner apparently wants a WWE job, especially since his options took a
hit when he had a falling out with the Jarretts prior to TNA starting, and
he sends out word that WWE is interested in him in hopes that it becomes a
self-fulfilling prophesy. In response, JR made it pretty clear in a Ross
Report that no talks have been had with Steiner.
- Back when they wanted to do a gay wedding with Too Much, Brian Christopher
outright refused to do it. Sources say Billy wasn't thrilled with it but
went along because he figured he'd have to pay if he didn't. The wedding
was more a Vince idea and Heyman just had to make the best of it.
NEWZ FROM NWA TOTAL NONSTOP
ACTION:
- The mood around TNA is said to be especially positive lately. The
Jarretts are excited about new deals they've struck and whatnot. A
potential financial backer will be at Wednesday's show. X-Pac and Road
Dogg, who's house arrest is finally up, will be on the show.
- Jeff Jarrett was on an internet show and gave every indication that TNA is
around for the long haul. He said they did have to make budget cuts as a
result of the Hassman situation, but they are now fine.
- TNA was warned against talking to the WWE-cut development guys because
most of those wrestlers are still under contract.
- "Slick" Mark Johnson isn't with TNA anymore. He's focusing on the rock
band he plays in and they're involved in some Battle of the Bands thing for
a record contract.
- The office soured on the Briscoe Brothers and Lost Boyz a while back when
they went 2 minutes longer than they were supposed to during a dark match.
It's expected that both teams will be used again, but management tried
sending them a message by not booking them.
- Mortimer Plumtree will likely make his on-camera return on the 18th!
Hoorah!
- A few TNA sources are questioning the idea of continuing to fly in Apollo
and Monte Brown.
- More X Division wrestlers should be coming in. Among the names being
tossed out are American Dragon, Xavier, C.M. Punk, Colt Cabana, and Ace
Steel. There's also been interest in Kenny and Jake from TE2.
- David Young is close to signing with Zero One. He's still got two dates
on his TNA deal, but they haven't been using him in hopes that people forget
the angle with Bobcat.
- Attorneys for Jay Hassman and Len Sabal filed papers in hopes of having
the suit against them moved from state court to federal court. The Jarretts
have 20 days to argue for keeping it in state court. Hassman and Sabal are
planning to file countersuits shortly.
- Sean Waltman has had a great relationship with Jerry Jarrett over the
years and is expected to get involved in some of the creative aspects, as
well as working with the younger guys. 'Pac now has an apartment in Los
Angeles and was working out at New Japan's dojo there, where he met with
Antonio Inoki. Waltman is working on a New Japan deal and is exploring some
options in Hollywood with on-air roles and stunt-coordination work.
NEWS FROM OTHER
PLACES:
- Longtime events coordinator Mike Lima died of a heart attack at 39. He
had a wife and four kids. He spent years in both the WWF and WCW. Shortly
after WCW was sold Lima was hired for the XWF, where he worked until they
downsized a few months back. XWF co-workers say Lima was known for having
heartburn and sweating attacks while at the office, but nobody ever
considered it to be anything serious. Lima had dinner with Jerry Sags two
nights before his death and complained that his arm had gone numb while the
two were walking after they ate. Sags advised Lima to get checked out, but
Lima said he was too busy. Brian Knobs had become very close with Lima
during their time in the XWF and is said to be taking his death very
hard.
- Shane Douglas did an interview explaining why he hates Francine. He says
Francine lied during her testimony for a court case filed by a fan who
claimed Douglas assaulted him at an ECW show. Shane says he tried
contacting her to find out why she lied, but she's ignored him. He hopes
her implants come in handy when she starts working at Hooters.
- Emory Hale, formerly of WCW and the XWF, is still waiting on a kidney
donor. Doctors are doing test to see if his sister matches up.
THAT'S ALL
FOLKS:
Seadawg
[slash] wrestling
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