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WWE Velocity by The Cubs Fan

21.9.2

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TV14 DLV Entertainment CC Open Fireworks - Loyd is hyped up about Stephanie's interference on RAW.

Billy Kidman (3) vs Tajiri (7) - your announcers are everyone hates Marc Loyd and Cole - they're all about Taker/Brock tomorrow night. This would be the third time (in 18 weeks) we've had this match up on this show - the series is currently even at one to one. Standoff. , Kidman with a headlock, Tajiri shoots Kidman into the ropes, Kidman back with a shoulderblock, Kidman off the ropes, over, Tajiri with a hiptoss, Kidman goes for the Cruiserweight Flip Out, but Tajiri starts to stand up so Kidman 'ranas him (or maybe Kidman meant to do that from the start? Can't tell.) Tajiri out, Kidman off the ropes, baseball slide dropkick is sidesteps and Tajiri hits a hard kick to the left shoulder. Cole starts to talk positively about Kidman overall slowing his game down - not being out of control - and then when Tajiri took over, Cole turned it into a negative. Kidman thrown shoulder first into the barricade. Thrown in and cover - one two no. Your ref is Brian Hebner. Stomping the arm. Armbar on the bad left arm and twist. Elbow to the arm. Jumping armbar takedown. Grounded armbar - I guess a Fujiwara, but he's more holding it twisted rather than cranking it in. Loyd has kids. Kidman battling up - forearm/rights with the good arm to get free, and then he manages an armdrag with the left arm. Grabbing it, covering - no, Tajiri rolls through into a hammerlock on the left arm. Stomping that arm. Knee drop. Yelling. Stretching it around the ropes for a three count. Armbar. Back to the grounded hammerlock. Holding it and kneedropping it. Cranking it. Kidman trying to draw from the fans - they help a little - up with back elbows, jumping snap mare to escape. Walking into the corner - and Tajiri nails the shoulder with a kick as he comes in. Tajiri walks out right into a dropkick. Kidman is down in the corner though, and Tajiri has a chance to follow up - into a kick. Into another kick. That left arm is dead right now. Tajiri with a high kick, Kidman ducks, clothesline, clothesline. Kick is caught, enziguri is not. Kidman covers one two no. Don't know how much longer Kidman can last with that shoulder - picking up Tajiri, 3/4 bulldog on for the Dudley Dog but Tajiri pushes him off - Kidman jumps to the second rope, turns around and comes off with nothing - well, Tajiri kicks him in the face so he gets something, cover one two no. Tajiri with a powerbomb - Kidman faceslam one two NO. Kidman grabs Tajiri by the arm to drag him in position, but Tajiri snap kicks him on the bad shoulder. Kidman to his knees - KO Kick is ducked, Kidman with a kick to the gut, Dudley Dog! Now dragging him into position  - Kidman going up for it, Shooting Star Press MISSES. Tajiri rolled out of the way and Kidman hit hard on the right shoulder, trying to protect himself. It does leave him really open - KO Kick to the left shoulder, one two NO! Slam, no Kidman slips behind, Kidman Sky High no his arm huts and he falls to his knees - KO Kick one two three. (4:54) Tajiri is undefeated against Kidman on this show when Torrie doesn't distract him. This does affect the ladder.

Still to come, Undertaker and Brock.

Burger King Crossface reversal of Thursday

Albert (w/last week) vs Sho Funaki - Albert punked out Funaki post match, so here we go. Hey, they updated Funaki's video and the announcers gave him his first name back. He's got something to say - "This is Funaki - SmackDown! #1 Announcer. Hey Albert - Albert! Last week, the people told you to Shave Your Back. Funaki agrees with the people - you are one hairy bully." Circle. Lockup - no, Funaki ducks it. Albert laughs - lockup no Funaki ducks it again. Funaki jumps up into a side headlock, Albert lifts him a couple feet off the ropes. Shot into the ropes and Albert levels him with a shoulderblock. Splash - but Funaki moves - dropkick to the face one huge kickout. Dropkick to the head again. Off the rope, bulldog. Off the ropes, cross body into a powerslam one two no. Elbow drop, elbow drop. Modified camel clutch. "Shave Your Back" chant causes Albert to go nuts - but let go of the hold. Funaki with rights but Albert isn't affect - gutwrench into over shoulder backbreaker, and Albert goes to his knees to drive it in. One two no. Turnbuckle smash. The chant distracts Albert again. Punches, boot choke. Albert takes his time following up and Funaki kicks him away. A knee ends that. Corner whip and Funaki goes down. Albert is pleased about it. Headbutt. Yelling at Funaki to get up - he's setting up for the Baldo Bomb - Funaki sloe up, but then turns, double choke on but Funaki pulls at the hair on Albert's chest! That's an interesting technique - knee lift, hard into the corner, Albert smash but Funaki gets his boots up. Off the second rope, cross body and he's caught into a high bearhug. Funaki pulls the body hair to get loose, rolling down into a sunset flip but Albert ain't going - punch but Funaki's out of the way. Funaki kick shoves Albert chest first into the corner, then schoolboy trips him on the way out - double leg hook cover one two THREE! (4:25) Funaki better get the heck out of there. Albert is chiding by the announcers for not finishing off Funaki when he had the chance. "He could've won this match ten minutes ago!" There's the clothesline. Loyd is all over some storyline where Albert's been warned about these repeated post match beatdowns - Mike Choida yells at him to get out of the ring. Albert leaves - is he coming back? Yes. Sliding dropkick! Plancha oh it's caught - back first into a post. And again. And dropped to the floor. Double arm raise. Will he leave this time? 

Up next, a Brock/Undertaker recap

Lugz Sara acting of Two Week Ago

So there you go. (5:49)

Earlier today, Smackdown #1 Announcer Funaki talked to Crash backstage. "Crash, we are 24 hours away from Unforgiven. [Crash gives this a thumbs up.] And you face off with Hurricane on Velocity. And you seem very - confident?" "How could I not be? Funaki, you know since I've come to SmackDown!, I'm unbeaten. Heck, an unblemished record. You might even say unstoppable. Funaki, do you know anyone who could stop me?" "Hurricane, tonight." [Crash is angry or shocker or something here. He leaves.] "For Velocity, this is Funaki, Smackdown #1 announcer reporting."

the Hurricane (9) vs Crash (yellow - smart move!, 7) - Ladder numbers are post Tajiri/Kidman so it is possible to have two 7s in one show. Loyd: "Crash is 2-0, kinda like the Chicago Bears, New Orleans Saints." Cole doesn't believe in Superheroes! Circle, lockup, Hurricane with a waistlock, Crash go behind, Hurricane armdrags out of it, Crash with a single leg, cover for zero, Hurricane with a single leg, cover for zero, stand off. Circle. Lockup- no, Crash with a kick. Off the ropes, into a hiptoss. Slam. Whip, sets up for the goozle but Crash sees it coming, stops, and slides out of the ring. Hurricane is annoyed. Crash tries to sneak back in but gets stomped on the hand and out. So Hurricane pulls him up to the apron, forearm. Crash with the jawbreaker over the ropes to stun him - back in with an inside cradle one two no. Hurricane and Shannon are both unsure why Matt's acting so goofy. Corner whip, push chest first, forearm to the back. One two no. Slam. Cover one two shockingly no. Front facelock - working the back with facelocks. Abdominal stretch - Crash set this up six inches from the ropes so someone's gonna grab it. Scotty 2 Hotty returns! (to the World for Unforgiven.) There's the grab - he gets caught right away. Mike Sparks warns him. Going for the stretch again but Hurricane blocks - forearm to the back, then reapplies. In the middle of the ring so I don't see a grab coming here. Cole goes off on a tangent about the referees asserting themselves - perhaps it was just a segue to get back to Brock/Taker. Hurricane chant  and he starts to rally with elbows - armdrag out. Crash up quick with a kick though. Corner whip, Crash spins, rushes into a boot. Hurricane to the second rope - Overcast! They'll never call it that again. I think Loyd called it a "floating neckbreaker" but the Hurricane flies. Both men down - nope, now Hurricane hops up into kinda pose position and goes after Crash. Right, right, whip, reversed, Crash spins and doesn't see the forearm coming. Crash always does that spin but it's sticking out tonight. Back elbow by Hurricane, corner whip, Crash goes in chest first and Hurricane hits the jumping neckbreaker on the way out one two no. Hurricane picks him up - front facelock, suplex is blocked, Crash runs him back first into the corner, inside cradle with feet on the ropes one two NO. Crash can't believe it - maybe he shouldn't used the bottom ones. Hurricane set up on the top rope and going for the superplex but Hurricane's feet aren't set up right so you know he's not going to get it - blocked, Crash is shoved off. Hurricane up - plancha! One two NO! You're no Orton. Hurricane setting up, SUPERKICK is caught, Crash spins him around, Crash kick caught, Hurricane spins him - goozle, thumbs up, Crash reverses into a fireman's carry like rollup! One two NO! Well Crash is here to wrestle, good to see that. Slam, no Hurricane goes behind, reverse facelock set up for the Eye of the Hurricane but Crash turns around in the hold and pushes Hurricane into the ropes, Crash tries the reverse rollup but Hurricane holds onto the ropes, Shining Wizard kick! One two three. (5:38) This was pretty good. Hurricane gets out of the cellar finnaly - good for him.

Coming up next, highlights from RAW. 

What he said. (2:01) None of the bits from SmackDown! And this leads to us our PPV card. Kane looks like a goof. That Jericho graphic shows how much thought they put into that title change. It makes sense on some level, but since when did they start calling Undertaker "the Striker?" anyway. Uh oh, Undertaker video package. (4:00)

Shannon Moore vs Randy Orton - I think Shannon has new music - new to me. They must be short on clips for Confidential if they're starting this one so late. Ring Announcer Jason Roberts is mentioned - obviously, Cole and Loyd don't read wwe.com because they don't know where Chimel is. Circle. Lockup, Randy with a headlock, takedown, Shannon with the leg scissors reversal, break. Shannon with drop toe hold, front facelock, Orton gets an armbar for a nanosecond and Moore rolls free. Standoff - it doesn't work if you've only been wrestling for :20. And if you do it in back to back matches. (Not to say it worked the first time.) Handshake/slap. Lockup, Orton with a hammerlock, Moore with a hammerlock, Orton reverses to a wristlock, Shannon rolls into a reversal, corner whip, reversed, Orton charges in but Moore flips out, Orton charges out but Moore armdrags him. Jumping spin kick one two no. Circle. Lockup, Shannon with a waistlock, Orton leverages him to the mat. Whip, Shannon may have tried for a spinning headscissors but Orton stops it and loads Shannon on his shoulder - snake eyes! Orton going up, Orton plancha but Shannon rolls through (well, you can see Orton pulling himself through without much effort but let's pretend he over hooked the leg or somethin') one kickout. Orton up and nailing Shannon with a clothesline. Kick to the ribs. Draw a card. Another. Maybe that one was more to the shoulder. Yea, - there's shoulder  into the corner buckle so I guess that's what he's going for. Another. I guess we have our heel. Armdrag takedown on the bad left arm. Cranking that arm. Hey I saw this before too. But it worked for Tajiri. Armbar on the mat, with Orton driving his knee into the shoulder joint. Now the knee is off and he's just tightening up the hold. Shannon trying to stomp the crowd back into it (battling out of the hold maybe), getting to his feet, forearm, forearm, forearm, whip, had down too son so Shannon kicks the shoulder. DDT? Shannon grabs the ropes (well, after he blocked it) and Orton goes down alone.  Kick to the gut, kick to the gut, dropkick. Shannon off the ropes, jumping spinning neckbreaker one two no. Corner whip, reversed, Moore with the WOW Crossbody one two no. Orton with a forearm, forearm, off the ropes, into a powerslam one two no. Orton covers again one two no. Orton can't believe it. Back suplex - no he's going to set Orton facing out on the top rope. What's he going to do here? Back Superplex? Shannon back elbows out, knocking Orton to the mat, then stands up - corkscrew moonsault is called the "Halo" by Loyd and it actually hits - one two no he needs a new finisher. Whip, no his arm hurts to much - Orton with a sour look on his face, kick to the gut, Overdrive (dubbed "the Ozone") one two three. (5:36) Nice that they're getting around to naming some of these moves, even if I still think they're incredibly lame. I guess the idea is that he lands hard on his bad left shoulder, which actually might make sense as compared to selling it as a neckbreaker variant. Give him an arm submission and you may have something to make the heelish bit he was working here work on a interesting level.

Oh wait I kept talking but the show is over. That's it.

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