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/7 April 2000

ECW on TNN by E.C. Ostermeyer




Sandman to Shawn Michaels' TWA?
Mike Awesome to WCW?
WWF takes over TNN?
TNN goes Gen-X??!
ECW sues XPW over the use of "X-treme" in their name?

These are some of the rumors and blurbs I've heard in just the past WEEK, and all having a bearing on Extreme Championship Wrestling.

Me, I'm just your recapper for yet another weekly sojourn into the Arena of Extreme, ol' "Elucidatin' Curettage" himself. (Look it up!)

And I only recap what I see, and let you, gentle readers, draw your own conclusions.

We are live on tape (1 April 2000) from the Siegel Center on the campus of Virginia Commonwealth University in Richmond, VA.

That whizzing sound you hear is John Singleton Mosby spinning in his grave!
Yankees in the Commonwealth! Again!

You know, every time I watch this show, ECW makes it a point to prove that, yes, they HAVE sold out the arena, and that there are no fancy camera angles hiding empty seats on THIS show.

Tonight is no exception.

Every seat is filled, or would be if this mostly male, college-age crowd wasn't on its collective feet and cheering like crazy.

Your hosts are Joey "No, my haircut does NOT make me look like Vanilla Ice! HE looks like ME!" Styles, and Joel "I think they put too much gas in me" Gertner.

Gertner's Poetry Corner offers us

"The ladies always love it...
(Styles looks like a pious hamster. Again.)

"When I'm here in Virginia...
(Gertner like a dyspeptic one.)

" 'Cause tonight at my hotel...
(Here comes the punch line.)

"I'm gonna - [gross and offensive phrase deleted by The Network for your safety]!"
(I believe it rhymes with "get stuck in ya!" Any ideas?)

Joey Styles (JS) gives Joel Gertner (JG) a look, and then says
"At this time, please welcome the Queen of Extreme, Francine..." (BIG pop from the fans!)
"... and the man who put a bounty on Tommy Dreamer, Raven!" (another big pop, though nothing compared to Francine's.)

Francine and Raven make their entrance, both wearing black leather jackets.

Francine's wearing "Daisy Duke"-style hotpants and a t-shirt that says something appropriately macho and vengeful.
Raven looks like something the highway clean-up crews threw back.
They are accompanied by two ECW Security "Black Suits", I guess to make sure that no burly, testosterone-sodden VCU "Joe College" makes a grab for Francine's, ummm, "essentials!"

Styles wastes no time:
"So YOU put a bounty, a HIT, out on Tommy DREAMER?" This to Raven.

"Because of the levels of depravity that I've attained," responds Raven, "I can understand why you'd think that I could do something of that nature. But Joey, you put FAR too much stock in the Internet, and FAR too much stock in the dirt-sheets. I had nothing to do with the "hit" on Tommy Dreamer."

JS: " But 'Da Baldies' said that you did..."

"Joey," says Francine, " I've known you for over six years. You and I, we go way back, right? I mean, who are you gonna believe? Myself, or "Da Baldies?!"
(Gertner is motioning to Styles to "Believe her!)

Francine continues.
"Not to mention, Joey, but I am a 'baldie' myself, but I just can't show you..." "WHOOO-HOOOO!" from the crowd.
Styles is nonplussed.
Gertner's suddenly on point like a hunting dog!
"...what I am telling you is that I am a 'baldie' myself, I just can't show you on TELEVISION...!"
HUGE pop from the crowd!
Joey's standing there, goggle-eyed.
Raven's got a wisp of a "knowing" smile on his face.
Gertner's doing his "Happy Chicken" dance.
"... and if anybody here knows who put the hit on Tommy Dreamer, it's me, and I know for a fact that it wasn't Raven!"

JS (recovering his composure): "Well then, maybe it was YOU who put the hit on Tommy Dreamer?"
Francine is incensed.
"Oh, so now you're gonna get cute, right? You know, Joey, in these six-plus years, I never liked you anyway, and who the HELL are you to get in my face and accuse me?! Huh?!!"
(Francine is right in Joey Styles' face.)
"Who the hell are you? Huh? Who the hell are you?!!"

At this point, "Da Baldies'" music starts up, and out they come, DeVito, Grimes, and Angel.
Styles moves to the far corner of the ring.
Francine takes off her jacket.
Gertner's looking for possible escape routes.
Raven just stands there, looking mildly amused, as "Da Baldies" enter the ring.

Angel's got the ring microphone.
"Yo, Raven, poppa! Why you tryin' to play yourself? You KNOW that you put that hit out on Dream!"

Angel runs a lo-o-o-ong sniff up Raven's right side.
"Is that fear I smell?"

"What you smell, " says Raven, "is your Mom, and that's only because I only had ten bucks on me..."
A spear by DeVito ends the verbal portion of this interview. All concerned proceed to the physical, as "Da Baldies" have Raven against the ropes and are beating the hell out of him. Joey Styles is trying to restrain an enraged Francine from diving into the fray. Gertner's nowhere to be found, as DeVito and Angel pinion Raven in the corner for a BIG SPLASH by the 400 lbs, Grimes, and we cut to...

Aw jeez...

Minister James Vandenberg, all snazzy in his crimson cassock and cheapjack red mood lighting. Looks like the "ECW Makeup Dept." has toned down the peaked eyebrows this week. He's still wearing the Lee Press-On "talons", though.

Hey, all you Dads that have daughters.
Want a good scare?

How's this:
"Daddy, there's a boy outside..."

Vandenberg's here to fill us in on the current ECW angles and gimmicks.

Awwww, do I have to??

"It looks like Tommy Dreamer rolled the Dice of Fate and...crapped out. You see, the hard line on the street is that Raven put a hit on Tommy Dreamer. Which doesn't surprise me, because Raven has the ethics of a weasel, and the loyalty of a drowning rat! That's why I like him! However, Raven refutes that, and Raven always tells the truth, even when he lies. The only thing that's certain around here, is that someone's pulling on an awful lot of strings. Hahahahahahahaha!"

Mr. Cameraman pulls back, and we see that "Dad's Worst Nightmare" has got strings attached to his cane. The strings lead down over a precipice. They are each attached to a limb of Mikey Whipwreck, who's sprawled at the bottom, moving his arms and legs like a puppet, and laughing crazily.

Here, watch these...

Opening Credits

...while I go wash out my eyes with soap.

And we're back to the ring in time to see Steve Corino and Jack Victory of Team Network making their way to the ring. Styles and Gertner are still wondering who put the hit on Tommy Dreamer, as we get our first dose of tonight's


ECW "Hardcore Heaven" PPV. ECW "Extreme Warfare, Vol. 1 " video. Pep Boys shock absorbers. Sammy Sosa shills for the "High Heat Baseball 2K" video game for Playstation. (Sosa: "Eets soo reeeeallll!"). Geico Insurance. MTV's Tom Green shills for "Road Trip" by eating a mouse! (Ooooog!) David Arquette-Cox falls off a cliff. (Hey, AT&T, how's about an anvil chaser for ol' Dave, a la Wiley Coyote? Pretty please? I'd be willing to pay? C'monnnn!)

We come back to the ring, just in time to hear Joel Gertner saying:

" you see, Joey, THAT'S how Francine keeps from getting razor burn!"

Match #1: Steve Corino (with Jack Victory of 'Team Network') d. Kid Cash (5:44)

This is the first appearance of Kid Cash on the "ECW on TNN" show. Corino's dumped his wrestling singlet for traditional tights and boots, ostensibly to curry favor with the TNN corporate suits.
Styles says that "TNN 's the only network who's offices are surrounded by chicken wire!"
Gertner says that "though there may not be a lot of cowboys at TNN, there sure is a lot of bullsh-"
"OH-KAY", says Styles, cutting him off," and speaking of 'steer excrement', I do believe that Cyrus is in the building tonight."
Meanwhile, Corino and Cash are trading wrist- and hammer-lock moves. Kid Cash dominates with a deep arm drag, followed by a drop kick, and then a running clothesline puts Corino out through the ropes to the floor. Victory goes to help him.

JS: " Everybody watching this match knows that Steve Corino is completely out-classed by Kid Cash."
JG: "I disagree, and I think Jack Victory would disagree as well!"

Kid Cash to the top turnbuckle, and WOW! There's a springboard one-and-a-half onto Corino & Victory, flattening them both!
Crowd : "ECW! ECW! ECW!"

Styles asks Gertner if he knows just how risky that last move of Kid Cash's was?
JG: "Why of course, having been a luchadore myself before managing the Dudleys to eight World Tag-team Titles! I was known as "El Muffin de los Studd-os!"
While Joey Styles digests that whopper, both men are back in the ring.
Irish Whip by Kid Cash is followed by a stiff clothesline rocks Corino in the corner. There's a chop ("Whooooo!" from the fans.) that Corino sells like Ric Flair.
Another whip, but this time, Corino's got an elbow up, and Kid Cash eats most of it. Another whip gets shortstopped by Corino twice, who then converts it into a sit-out powerbomb and a pin attempt on Kid Cash. After the kick-out, Cash crawls to the ring apron. Unfortunately, this is also The Wrong Part of Town, as Jack Victory's big elbow drop across the throat tumbles Kid Cash to the floor.
Corino's outside as well, and whips Kid Cash into the steel guardrail. Both men back in the ring, where Corino tries another Irish Whip. Kid Cash uses the momentum to climb the ropes, and do a double springboard Giant Splash onto the surprised Steve Corino. Lateral Press, 1,2, no!
Corino recovers first, and hits a clothesline on Kid Cash, sending him to the mat.

Some fan hollers "You SUCK!" to Corino real loud.
Ah, nothing like cheap heel heat, is there?

Chop by Corino ("Whooo!"). There's another whip by Corino, but Kid Cash ducks under the running lariat, and hits a through-the-ropes baseball slide on Jack Victory, tumbling him way up the ramp. Corino and Kid Cash trade punches across the top rope, then Kid Cash goes up top, and hits a flying hurancanrana on Steve Corino. In comes Jack Victory, but his running clothesline misses, and Kid Cash nails him with a double drop-kick that sends him spinning into referee Jim Keener, squashing him in the corner. Big Right Hand by Corino staggers Kid Cash, whose Irish Whip gets reversed. Corino's trying for a backslide, but Kid Cash reverses it, kicks Corino in the gut to double him over, double underhooks the elbows, PEDIGREE! Cover, but there's no referee, so Kid Cash does his own count out.
Yikes, here's Rhino in the ring! He's daring Kid Cash to come at him. Kid Cash leapfrogs the first of Rhino's gore attempts, but can't avoid the second, and gets speared big time.
Rhino drags the groggy Steve Corino across Kid Cash, and the equally groggy Jeff Keener makes the count. Another win for Steve Corino and Team Network.

Backstage, Mr. Cameraman shows us a door. The sign says "ECW Wrestling Dressing Room".
Inside Little Guido and Big Sal E. Graziano are cutting a promo for the WCW Television Title match next week on TNN.
Out comes Don "Cyrus the Virus" Callis to say that The Network has full confidence in Little Guido's ability to wrest the TV Title from Super Crazy.
Even more so since he, Cyrus, acting on The Network's behalf, was making it a Three Way Dance including the "Japanese Buzzsaw", Yoshihiro Tajiri.
At the mention of Tajiri's name, Guido wants no part of the match.
That is, until Cyrus assures him that, after they both dispose of Super Crazy, Tajiri will "do the lay-down" for Little Guido, leaving him as the Champion. Guido's mollified, especially when Cyrus says that Little Guido will be "capturing the "Young Italian Male" demographic which The Network really wants, "just like Bruno (Sammartino?) did for Vince McMahon Sr. back in the Sixties!"
After Cyrus leaves, Little Guido tells Big Sal E. that he can't lose next week, to which Sal replies, "Yeah, maybe. But I still think that the guy's pretty shifty!"

Same old same old.

We come back to see Mikey Whipwreck heading for the ring.
Mr. Cameraman gets collared by Cyrus, who drags him into Yoshihiro Tajiri's locker room.
Tajiri's busy doing katas.
Cyrus interrupts Tajiri to say that he's included Little Guido in the Three Way Dance for the TV title next week.
Tajiri's not too pleased, and is quite voluble about it, in Japanese, of course. Cyrus just keeps smiling that pimp's smile of his, and says (in English) for "Tajiri-san" not to worry.
He's worked a deal with Little Guido where, after they both squash Super Crazy, Guido will do the lay-down, and Tajiri will be the TNN Network TV champ! There's a lot of give and take between the two, and, truth be told, not a great deal of understanding on either side.
Cyrus, still with that infuriating smile on his face, finishes the spot by talking about how Tajiri would capture the "Young Japanese Female" demographic that the Network suits are so hot for.

Whoops, THAT didn't come out the right way, did it?

Nothing to see here, folks. Move along, please.

Match #2: Super Crazy d. Mikey Whipwreck (ECW World Television Title Defense.)(4:36)

While Mikey and Super Crazy do some great "chain-wrestling" moves in the ring, Gertner finds it ironic that Super Crazy now holds the TV Title, since, when he was growing up in Mexico, the family TV only had two channels: "On" and "Off!"
Meanwhile, Mikey Whipwreck tries for his "Whippersnapper" finisher, but gets pushed off, and Super Crazy counters with a tilt-a-whirl flying head scissors that puts Mikey out of the ring.
Super Crazy goes to the ring apron, and mule-kicks Mikey Whipwreck in the chin. A Super Crazy Asahi moonsault finds nothing but concrete, but fortunately, Super Crazy lands on his feet.
Not so fortunately, Mikey superkicks Super Crazy in the neck, knocking him to the ramp-way. Whipwreck gathers Super Crazy up and whips him into the steel guardrail. There's a side Russian leg sweep by Mikey, and Crazy gets the steel guardrail in the back. Mikey grabs the "Insane Luchadore" around the waist from behind, levers him up and hotshots Crazy's noggin off the top of the steel guardrail.

(While the action is going on, Joel is remarking on Mikey Whipwreck's red hair, saying that for anybody who'd worked a week too long in "Atlanta", you'd expect their hair to be gray! Styles agrees, saying he has had THAT confirmed by "the guy who runs this joint!" (Paul Heyman?))

Back to the action, where Mikey hits an elbow to the nose, followed by giving Super Crazy the "finger", and then finishes off with a backbreaker. Both men in the ring, and Mikey Whipwreck continues his assault on Super Crazy with a knee to the back of the neck, followed by another backbreaker. Mikey ties up Super Crazy's legs and...?

is that Mil Mascaras' old "Altar of the Sun" submission hold?
I haven't seen that move in twenty years!
Still looks painful as all get out!

Well, the "Insane Luchadore" doesn't submit, and Mikey's forced to break the hold. A whip to the corner gets reversed, and Mikey lands hard. Super Crazy up top now, and here's a "Ten-Count Punch-Down" with the fans counting the punches "en Espagnol".
Another whip across the ring by Super Crazy, and another attempt at the Punch-Down, but Mikey Whipwreck stops the count at three with a Reverse Atomic Drop on Super Crazy. Whipwreck drapes Crazy across the middle rope, face up, goes up top and NAILS the guillotine leg drop. Lateral press, 1,2, not this time,
Whipwreck with an Irish Whip to the ropes. Super Crazy counters with a go-behind, but Mikey reverses and hits another Reverse Atomic Drop, followed by a side Russian leg sweep. Hook of the near leg, cover, 1,2, Crazy gets a shoulder up.
Whipwreck is up on the top turnbuckle, but his set-up move gets countered as Super Crazy nails him with a running powerbomb.

Super Crazy with a leap to the top rope,

Crazy straddles and hooks the far leg, 1,2,3! Your winner and still ECW World Television Title Champion, Super Crazy!

Whoops, here's Little Guido in the ring for the post-match beat-down on Super Crazy.
JS: "Looks like Guido didn't want to wait until next week!"
Little Guido gets in a couple of shots on Super Crazy before he's blindsided by Yoshihiro Tajiri, who nails Guido with a couple of stiff "buzzsaw" kicks to the head. Tajiri then sprays Super Crazy full in the face with the "Green Mist Spew", followed by a mean-looking double drop kick to the head, and that's it for the "Insane Luchadore".
As Tajiri stares down the boo-ing crowd, and Joey Styles screams that "All hell has broken loose tonight!", we take time out for some more


And now it's time for "Introspective Moment" with Tommy Dreamer.
Tommy's "Quiet Place" looks suspiciously like the locker room.

Tommy's also wearing a New York Yankees warm-up jacket.
In Richmond, VA.

"Let me get this straight. It's the year 2000, and there's a BOUNTY placed on my head? What a joke! All these guys are gonna come in and try to collect."
(Pulls out a fat wad of currency.)
"Here! Here's REAL money! I double whatever he's paying you, if you're man enough to get the job done!
"I don't understand you Raven. Why won't you face me, one on one? We have fought... sooo many times before, we know each other..." pauses to look at the back of his right hand, "... like the back of our hand.
Dreamer punches the locker with his right fist.
Two more times!

"And there's times when, I tell you, I hate the back of my hand right now!"

"If you can get out of your pill-induced stupor for one minute, and realize that, through failed gimmicks and unsuccessful stays "elsewhere", you're nothing without me!
"And you want to claim that you hate me.
"But you need me!
"And you want to blame your father for your messed-up life!
"But if you peel back your hair, and pull out your piercings, and look beneath your tattoos... you are a thirty six year-old man who should finally realize that the person he hates most...
is himself!"
"Face it, Scotty (Levy)! Without Tommy Dreamer, there is NO Raven!"

1Wrestlingdotcom replays the after-match beat-down of Super Crazy by Little Guido and Yoshihiro Tajiri.

JS: "So next week, right here, Super Crazy defends the ECW World Televison Title in a Three Way Dance against Tajiri and Little Guido."
JG: " Also, next week, Rob Van Dam makes his return to ECW Television. And if there's anyone who can stick it to Cyrus, it's Rob Van Dam!"

"Da Baldies" make their entrance, then we hear the lilting notes of Alice In Chains' "Man in the Box", and Tommy Dreamer comes to the ring.

Match #3: Tommy Dreamer & The Sandman (with Raven) d. "Da Baldies" (Match time unknown. See below.)

Tommy's got the microphone, and says that, since "Da Baldies" think this is a three-on-one Handicap Match, he, Tommy, feels that he should get a drunken "Hardcore" partner from the crowd.
A forest of hands greets his last comment.
Yep, lots of takers, though there don't seem to be too many drunks among them. Must be that dog-goned "No Coolers" rule again.

Dreamer, unfazed, says "Hit the music!"

Metallica's "Enter Sandman" cranks up, and everybody, ("Da Baldies" included), yes, the WHOLE PLACE is on it's feet looking for the "Hardcore Icon" himself.
He appears, way up top, with beer, pack o' smokes, and Singapore cane.
Well, it's a four-beer night as the Sandman takes his own sweet time about getting to the ring.
About half the fans are singing along with the frightening lyrics. The other half are cheering with terrifying intensity!
The Sandman reaches the ring, (and about time, too), pops another cold one, has a few words with Angel, and just as we are about to leave, Tommy Dreamer comes from backstage again, only this time, he's got a roll of barbed wire...

ECWwrestlingdotcom's got X-rated (yeah, right!) pics of Elektra!
Hey! What happened to the "Pervo Pics" from last week?

ECW arena schedule
(Your reader is Paul Heyman, just kay-fabing his ass off!)

4/8 "The Flick" in Buffalo, NY (Rob Van Dam's return to "ECW on TNN")
4/13 Indianapolis, IN
4/14 Evansville, IN
4/16 St Charles, MO ("Wrestlepalooza 2K" comes to the St. Louis area.)
4/21 Bethlehem, PA ("Cyberslam 2K, Part 1")
4/22 ECW Arena in South Philadelphia, PA ("Cyberslam 2K, Part 2")
4/27 Utica, NY
4/28 Schenectady, NY
4/29 Poughkeepsie, NY
5/5 Duluth, MN
5/6 Minneapolis, MN
Heyman: "Jesse Ventura for President! We mean it! We believe it..." (smooch smooch smooch!)"...and we're kissing his ass on network television!"

We come back to...

An 'Extreme Replay'?
They interrupted tonight's Main Event for the "Arena Schedule" and Paul Heyman kissing Ventura's ass??!!
Who's doing the post-production here?

Anyhoo, Dreamer and the Sandman are seen blasting "Da Baldies" with beer, then using a ladder, chairs, tables, and the Singapore cane to "raise the level of violence!" (JS).
Dreamer places the barbed wire in the ring, then suplexes Grimes onto it HARD! Ol' Grimes is rolling about, howling, while the barbed wire digs into his crotch. He's on his hands and knees now, but the wire still won't turn loose. Tommy puts the ladder on the mat, then lays Grimes on top of it. Dreamer's on the top turnbuckle, and is wrapping a strand of the barbed wire around his forearm. He sets for the elbow drop, but Grimes rolls out of the way, and Dreamer's elbow hits the ladder.
With Tommy out of action momentarily, "Da Baldies" make the most of this respite to clobber the Sandman pretty good.
Tommy gets clobbered as well, and it looks like "The End" for Dreamer and Sandman.
Angel thinks so, and, grabbing the ring microphone, says that "Da Baldies'" matches always end up as a "three-on-one!"

What the...?

Is that RAVEN"S music?!

Yup, and here comes the man himself, head wrapped in a blood-soaked bandage, out for payback on the beat-down he suffered earlier this evening at the hands of "Da Baldies."
DeVito gets clobbered.
Then Angel.
Raven sets up the steel chair in the ring, then drop toe-holds Grimes face first onto the seat.
Angel gets tossed through the ropes and out onto the floor.
Raven's got DeVito.
Sets for the move, cinches DeVito's head in real tight, plays to the crowd a bit,and there's the "Evenflo DDT", and the cover.
Referee Jim Mullinaux counts 1,2,3, and Dreamer/Sandman/Raven win the match.
Post-match, Dreamer gets to his feet, and eyes Raven with undisguised venom. Raven's giving Dreamer the stink-eye as well.
The two are squaring off, and it looks like we are FINALLY gonna get a resolution to this whole story-line, when

Out comes Mike Awesome and Judge Jeff Jones.
Once in the ring, Awesome confirms that, indeed, Raven was NOT the one who put the bounty on Tommy Dreamer.
Awesome knows who did, however, but he lets the Judge tell who it is.
Jones, with barely contained glee, tells Dreamer that it was himself, Judge Jeff Jones, who ordered the hit!
(What a swerve! My face must resemble Dreamer's, because I never saw THAT coming!)
Dreamer and Raven don't have time to act, because they get double clotheslined by Mike Awesome, who then grabs not one, but two tables, and Awesome Bombs Tommy and Raven through each.
Awesome stands in the center of the ring, glowering, while Judge Jeff Jones is just capering around, and it's time for


When we come back, it's to see Judge Jeff Jones and Mike Awesome back in the locker room. Jones is still celebrating, and making much of his own cleverness in putting out a contract on Tommy Dreamer.
A nasty gleam starts in Mike Awesome's eye, and he rounds on Jeff Jones, shouting that HE was the one who took out Tommy Dreamer, and therefore HE should get the bounty money.
Jones, terrified, coughs up the cash.
It's not enough, though, as Awesome grabs Jones by the neck, and hollers that he ought to be paid more for taking out Raven as well!
Jones, choking, and REALLY coughing this time, finds some more money, which Awesome takes as well.

(Wow! That;'s the first time I EVER saw a lawyer give money BACK to his client!)

Awesome's still not satisfied.

Aaagh! He's going to speak!
"I got money in my pocket and food on my plate, and the ECW (Heavyweight) title on my shoulder, because I'm... just... AWESOMMME! Grrrrrr!"

Oh, yeah! He'll fit right in over at WCW, no problem at all!

Jeez, Mr. Cameraman, not a CLOSE-UP of this guy, please, I'm beggin' you...!

Mercifully, we cut to another backstage area, where the Impact Players are cutting a promo.
Dawn Marie is particularly "buoyant" this evening.

The director is counting down, "Three, two ...?"

when Cyrus interrupts the shoot, and says that the Impact Players are good for ratings, and that they had the "sexiest manager in wrestling!"
He departs, and "World's Sexiest Man", Jason, sensing that his Big Chance has finally arrived, comes out front to do some pose-downs for Mr. Cameraman.
Needless to say, this sends Dawn Marie into a tizzy, screeching at Jason that

"It was ME, that he was talking about! Jaasonnnn! Heyyyy!"

Lance Storm and Justin Credible are seen smirking in the background.

Next, we get a WHOLE lot of Miss Jazz, who is usually lovely, except when she's angry.
Tonight, Jazz is REAL p.o-ed at Dawn Marie!
She states that she does wrestling instead of "catfights", and then uses a whole lot of bad language that nearly overheats the censor's "bleeper".
Hey, Jazz, on your next promo (the NEXT promo? HA!) try to keep it at least PG-13, okay?

And here's Cyrus and Rhino sitting in the locker room.
Rhino's hunched forward, and still in need of a wash and set.
He appears to be...sobbing? Again?
Cyrus, oblivious to Rhino's emotional display, speaks of Rob Van Dam, saying that when Van Dam returns to ECW next Friday night, it will be a very different world that he comes back to.
A world dominated by Rhino.
Rhino raises his head.
He wasn't sobbing, he was seething with rage!
After snarling at the camera about how he plans to destroy Rob Van Dam, Rhino headbutts a locker for emphasis.
He actually dented the STEEL locker with his head!
Cyrus, grinning nastily, nods his approval, as we get the

Closing Credits

See you next week.

E.C. Ostermeyer
[slash] wrestling

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