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Mr. Saturday Afternoon




It seems like all ECW fans worship Tommy Dreamer to be the most loyal man in wrestling. He has turned down numerous offers from other promotions to stick with ECW for his whole career. He has suffered so many injuries trying to make ECW better. But is he really that great? So let's see some reasons why Tommy Dreamer is just a fraud and won't be remembered by anybody in 15 years. Shall we?

The first obvious thing why nobody will remember him is because he just can't wrestle a good match. Honestly, can someone tell me the last time Dreamer had a good wrestling match with someone? All of his matches have to consist of mindless brawls in the crowd, a ladder, and some other foreign object that will lead to a gimmick match with him and Justin Credible. If he's so great of a wrestler why can't he just wrestle a match without any of those things?

The second reason nobody will remember him is because Tommy Dreamer is fat and out of shape. It looks like he's never went to a gym in his life. Come on, the guy has to wear a shirt when he wrestles because he's so embarressed of himself. Face it, he has bigger breasts then his valet Jazz. Someone needs to buy him a bro or a manzairre. Another reason why he won't be remembered is because he can't do the one single thing that can really make an average wrestler look great: He can't work the mic. OK, I know this isn't the most important thing in the world to get over, but he just can't do it. Every single Tommy Dreamer promo I have ever seen has himself banging his head against a locker while saying some nonsense that can not be understood. Then at the end of it he cries. What is the point of that? I mean can I just bang my head against a locker and say some crap and be loved?

Also Tommy Dreamer rarely ever wins. Remember his feud with Raven? He won once. The bad thing about that is that feud spanned over two whole years. That must have been at least 50 losses for Dreamer. And the worst part about that is the only reason Dreamer won the last match between the two was because Raven was going to WCW. What about the feud with Justin Credible? He won once. Tommy Dreamer and some other tag partner would beat the Dudleys every once in awhile. That's just a few examples. He reminds me of Barry Horowitz.

Like I just mentioned above Tommy Dreamer cries, and cries, and even cries some more. That's all he ever does. He cries during interviews, after his wins, when he gets turned on by another face, (which happens a lot) and even when his girlfriend got 3D'ed by those damn Dudleys. Remember when he gave his "retirement" speech? He could barely finish the interview because he was crying so much. And who could forget the historic night where he won the ECW Heavyweight Title from Tazz and jobbed it to Justin Credible in the same night? After he beat Tazz for the belt Dreamer cried so much it it seemed like he was at a funeral he cried so much.

The last reason is because he has never left ECW. At least 85% of wrestling fans don''t watch or know about ECW. This means that they won't know or care about Dreamer. Besides if he did go to WCW he would be stuck in there "hardcore" division since he wrestled in ECW. And if he went to the WWF he would be stuck on Jakked/Metal beating Gangrel and the Bossman. Did anybody care that Tommy Dreamer interfered during the HHH-Tazz match on Smackdown? And I know barely any of you remember Dreamer being on Raw about 3 years ago since it was so boring.

Let's all just face the facts. Tommy Dreamer is a horrible wrestler. He is fat and out of shape. His back is like Jello. If he really wants to help ECW he should retire. Maybe then someone in ECW will get to be in the spotlight and make it the number two company in wrestling. In 15 years he should be out of our minds. And hopefully he won't be a Dusty Rhodes by wrestling horrible matches showing the heel what old school is all about. Have a good day everyone.

On a side note. Is it me or is Chris Hyatte's mop ups getting a lot better lately? Get it?

Mr. Saturday Afternoon

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