THE GOOD, BAD, AND UGLY FOR 10/23/2000
There are few things worse than a Monday morning where you have to listen to an inane radio DJ droning on about celebrity gossip while sitting in traffic on the way to a job that you could do without.
However, there are few things better than coming home Monday evening and plopping down on the couch for a night of sports entertainment.
Yes, friends, it's Michaelangelo and, contrary to popular opinion, I am a wrestling fan. There's something inside me that says tonight's shows may well make those of us who admit to liking this stuff very proud.
One non-wrestling tidbit. Go see Bedazzled. Brendan Frazier is incredibly funny and versatile. If you don't like him, at least go to see Elizabeth Hurley in all those great outfits. I am thinking of raiding the production's wardrobe closet just for CyanIndigo.
WCW has come back to the states after a very successful two week jaunt to the land down under. Admittedly, they put on a couple of fairly decent Nitro shows. Word is that morale is kind of skewed these days, though. Brett Hart got his walking papers last week and word is that the impending sale is still up in the air. I am thinking most of the guys in the locker room are scared for their futures in the business, and they should be. We'll see how all this emotion translates to the ring there tonight.
To top it off, this Nitro will be leading WCW into the Halloween Havok PPV on Sunday.
Expect Vampiro to be the "surprise superstar" slated to return this evening. How long will it take him to job? I give him 7 minutes.
The WWF is coming off their No Mercy PPV which had its ups and downs. Now, I did not see the PPV myself, but I have read every recap I could get my hands on, so I have a few comments.
Okay, I think that's enough of that. Let's just see where the night takes us, shall we?
The Good, Bad, and Ugly for October 23, 2000
WCW MONDAY NITRO
SAD: Nitro is back in the United States. Half full arenas and piped-in cheers and boos are back as well. That's gotta be an ego breaker to the guys in the locker room. Notice the low shots of the arena starting the show.
HMM: Palumbo has been wearing Hulkamania yellow tights. I wonder who will be the heel when these two guys break up.
BAD: The Harris Brothers. Boy, have these two been wasted lately. Have they won a match since they returned?
BAD: Madden and Nash on commentary at the same time.
I WONDER...how Nash feels about Hall being released? He seems a bit lackadaisical. Then again, he always seems that way.
BAD: Constant muting throughout the match interrupts the commentary team. Does WCW know just how annoying this really is?
BAD: Nash on the H-Bomb to Palumbo: "And that's the bottom line..." Um, how many commentators are going to steal their lines?
GOOD: Nash choking out Staziak when he dares get in his face. The few times I have liked Nash lately are when he has shown all this rage against the Perfect Event. If he put half as much effort into his wrestling, he might get less heat from the critics.
UGLY: Pamela Paulshock's orange dress. She looks like she should be singing about fruit.
GOOD: Booker's interview with Mean Gene. Can't fault the man's mic skills. His wrestling ability and workrate are nothing to scoff at either. What took them so long to put this guy into the upper card?
BAD: I hate all of Booker's catchphrases, especially "Don't hate the player, hate the game."
WHAT...the hell is on Gene's hand?
BAD: Midajah's still not wearing a skirt. I guess the leather pants is her official look.
GOOD: I love when locker rooms empty into the ring.
BAD: It really makes no sense.
GOOD: Awesome goes after Steiner...perhaps he will finally make it to the big time.
BAD: Since Awesome is next in line for a title shot a week from now, it may be a sign that Steiner will be champion then. I'd like to see the belt on Booker for longer than a month at a time.
AWFUL: The promo Steiner cut on Awesome where he ends up baa'ing like a sheep. Egads. There's awful and then there's God awful...and then there's that last promo.
GOOD: Stevie Ray manages to ignore Madden quite well.
GOOD: Sanders promo on The Cat. I think he's pushing that "SOL" catchphrase a bit too hard.
GOOD: The Jung Dragons are back!|
BETTER: Leia Meow is with them. Yow.
BAD: Madden's line about her: "Sanders has padded gloves and she has a padded bra..." Yeah, asshole, and you have a padded stomach.
BAD: Jamie San attacks Sanders with wrestling moves...isn't this a kickboxing match?
TERRIBLE: This whole travesty of a match. It takes too long, makes the Dragons look stupid, and seems a waste of my time.
BAD: Leia hurts her leg kicking Sanders in the junk. He pulls out a protective cup to explain why he no sold the blow. Now shouldn't she just kick him again? I mean, he just removed the protection! I thought she was the brains of the operation.
FUCKING ASSHOLE: Madden has officially stolen Stevie's Yak line. I really hope he is the first guy to get canned when the McMahons move in.
INTERESTING: Madden on Kronik: "If anyone ever buys this company, I might just hire Kronik to protect my job." You're gonna need it, you wanker.
GOOD: Adams cuts a heel interview with a few face elements worked it. He puts Goldberg over in a backhanded way. Not bad.
BAD: Too bad, Goldberg has already beaten these two guys individually. Kinda takes all the mystery out of the end, doesn't it?
GOOD: Three Count is back! Woo hoo!
BAD: They become fodder for Kronik. Didn't we go through this a few months ago?
WOW: Meltdown on Shannon! Holy shit, the sheer force of him coming over Clarke's shoulder could have snapped a man's spine!
HEH: Nash manages to work in a couple of little comments about his impression of Hall's release...and then he goes full on to bash the company for their actions. Now that makes me wonder if it is a work, or if Nash is just shooting off his mouth as usual...or maybe he knows something that none of the rest of us know.
GOOD: The MIA's depiction of Team Canada. Jigsaw Jim Jugghead and his 9 foot 2x4 cracked me up. "I can't spell Canada, tough guy!" Who knew that Wall could be funny?
GOOD: I know that this whole shtick is lifted from DX's own book, but that doesn't make it less funny. Okay maybe a little, but I laughed.
ARGH: I can't stand to look at Mike Awesome in that suit. This is supposed to keep us from switching to RAW?
SUGGESTION: I think that the only way they could possibly keep the viewers is to put the Nitro Girls in the ring and have them strip naked, and even that would be a high risk.
BAD: Oh, so we get Nash at 9 p.m. This better be good...I have a theory...it's a bit far fetched...but could they have swerved us here? Could the Bad Guy be coming back?
NOPE: We get Goldberg instead. If Hall had come back, I might have hesitated with the remote. I am not interested in another Goldberg squash.
BAD: All sorts of sound troubles backstage during Goldie's entrance. Nice to see they worked those little kinks out. No wonder Vince wants to put all his own people on the production crew.
GOOD: Goldberg no selling the jumping back elbow. Nice spot in spite of itself.
BAD: Weak ass spear there.
BAD: So we get to see Goldie for five seconds? How delightful.
BAD: Not only is Disco still carrying that duck, but there are now signs in the audience asking for it.
INTERESTING: Disco is the second person tonight to allude to the possible buyout of the company. Is that really a good idea? Maybe at this point it doesn't matter, but I gotta believe that you don't air your dirty laundry. Besides, the 60% of their audience that is not on the Internet don't have any clue what he is talking about anyway.
GOOD: Jindrak, Wright, and Kidman in a three way dance. I won't gripe about these three.
WOW: Wright with a top rope missile dropkick that nails Jindrak right in the head! Nice form, Berlyn.
GOOD: The champions beale Kidman into the ring! That just looks great.
BAD: The match ends way too soon. I was just starting to get into it.
UGH X2: Crowbar in 70's gear. Why not just ruin all your best young workers with suicide gimmicks?
BAD: Stevie and Madden have degraded from mildly amusing banter to childish bickering that is more annoying than anything else. Well, I hate Madden anyway, but I just thought I'd mention this.
GOOD: Stevie compares Crowbar to Rollo from Sanford and Son. Any reference to a Red Foxx series is okay by me.
UGLY: Madden screeching, "He's baaaaccccccckkkkkkkkargleargle!!!!" when Vampiro comes out. My kingdom for a telescopic sight.
SIGN: "The people behind me can't see." What sort of asshole brings that to a wrestling match?
DECENT: Crowbar versus Vampiro. Not sure what the point of this match is, but I can't say I hated it. There were some good moves and a fair amount of bumps, so it's all good.
BAD: It runs a little long...just a little.
WOW: That top rope belly to belly was sweet! Nice air there.
GOOD: Stevie Ray is the only guy who keeps asking what the rules of this match are. I am asking too. Since the ref allows everything, I am gonna have to assume no DQ.
EXCUSE ME? Crowbar goes through the tables and now the ref rings the bell?
GOOD: Vampiro reveals why he went after Crowbar, and it makes sense!
WHAT THE? Shane Douglas in a cast again? What the hell?
GOOD: Konnan getting in Shane's face. Not bad acting there K-Dogg.
WHAT THE...There's a match between these two guys tonight? Why? They are supposed to be fighting at the PPV...why give it away now?
AH: The PPV match is a mixed tag and includes Tygress and Torrie.
AH FINALLY: At the end of the night, Tony finally mentions Yokozuna.
BAD: A fucking tiger?!?! They are wasting money on hiring a tiger for the night!?! That poor animal is freaking out. I don't think a loud crowd, fireworks, and bright lights are the most healthy things to have around an animal as dangerous as that.
BAD: They are playing Booker T's video as Awesome's music is still coming through the PA.
GOOD: Midajah is looking quite busty tonight...I daresay Trish Stratus busty.
BAD: Midajah gets in the ring and blatantly kicks Awesome in the face and the ref does not call for a DQ. What kind of screwy rules do they follow in this federation?
BAD: Booker spends a little too much time putting Papa Pump over at the commentary table.
GOOD: Awesome and Steiner really work it well tonight. Lots of great suplexes and high impact moves.
NASTY: Pump nails Awesome with a huge Samoan drop! That has to be hard.
GOOD: The match ends clean.
BAD: Steiner wins again. this guy is just like X-Pac. He never loses.
OVERALL: Not as bad as it could have been but not as good as I was expecting. Most of the matches jelled well. I am not sure what I think about Awesome/Steiner as the main event, but the two men did produce a good match. Again, mot of tonight's fault lies with the announcers' table. It seems that Madden just spends the entire two hours badly spewing other people's lines all night. Stevie Ray bickers with him while Tony keeps promoting anything but what's happening in the ring. When and if WWFE moves in to revamp things, I hope they take a good long look at who's calling the matches.
WWF MONDAY NIGHT RAW
GOOD: Vince personally narrates a tribute to Yokozuna. Rest in peace, big man.
BAD: I didn't hear them mention that he was a World Champion. They did show him holding the belt once. I guess that would have screwed up the whole "Samoans don't win titles" thing.
HEY: I had no idea that WWF was in Connecticut tonight! Damn! I coulda gone to the show.
GOOD: Rikishi in Polynesian garb and with new music. Listen to those boos! He made the transition to heel in record time.
WAY TO GO RIKISHI: He has to be hurting inside after hearing about his cousin's death. See, it's the ability to hold onto your composure and deliver a great interview under these circumstances that makes you great. The man is a professional and I commend him.
GOOD: Rikishi is the smartest man on earth! While Stone Cold was run over 10 months ago and only sought to beat the revenge into Rikishi, the big Samoan thought enough to actually press criminal charges against Austin when he tried to reciprocate the heinous deed.
INTERESTING: Rikishi calls out Rocky. I can't imagine that the People's champ is too happy to talk to his cousin after last night.
GOOD: The exchange between Rocky and Rikishi. The crowd is totally into this and the timing between these two guys is great.
BAD: Rikishi does flub a few lines now and then...he steps on his tongue a couple of times...
GOOD: That will all come out in the wash. His mic skills are well above average.
BAD: The Rock's trademark pauses kind of get annoying after ten minutes.
BAD: The camera angle of Rock delivering the Rock Bottom to Rikishi. It's too close for us to get a good look at it.
BAD: Lita defending her title in a "Bra and Panties" match? She doesn't have to agree to this! She's the champion! If she wants to get her hands on trish, why doesn't she just ask for the match herself?
ER..UM...not that I am complaining or anything. I have no problem at all with seeing either of these two women lose their clothes, I just think that Lita is better than this.
BAD: Mick playing the lech. Leave that stuff to the King, Mick.
SUGGESTION: Why not make it a Lillian Garcia's bra and panties match? The winner is the first person to strip the ring announcer to her skivvies.
OBSERVATION: Trish is hardly wearing anything to start with. Are those supposed to be shorts that she has on?
UGLY: The flying head scissors on Trish jammed her head right to the mat.
BAD: Was there a point to this match other than to show us Trish's ass again?
GOOD: Looks like there was...RTC in the house.
WOW: Lita has some serious juggs. Holy shit. Who knew she was so...er...um...top heavy.
GOOD: Ivory joined RTC! Woo hoo! Finally we get to see her wrestle again...and we get to hear her on the stick again! I am glad they finally brought her back and that she has joined this group.
GOOD: Edge and Christian and the Conquistadors. I am interested to see how this plays out, but they have to either end it or really give us something worthwhile tonight or it will be officially old.
HUH: Why did they show that station wagon pulling into the parking lot? What the hell was that all about?
GREAT: Benoit. Yeah baby. Chew his face off!
GOOD: He's got a new shirt...I love it...a broken bone on an x-ray with the words "Victim of the Crossface" surrounding it. I gotta get me one of them.
GREAT: Benoit is solid on the stick tonight. He even got some smatterings of applause out there.
BAD: He's fighting Road Dogg again? Jeez.
CHRIST: Garcia announces "Chris Jericho" as the winner. Just when I thought she had her shit together...
COOL: Malenko is now back with Benoit. I have no problems with that.
GOOD: HHH puts Benoit over as the "best damn technical wrestler" with whom he has ever faced in the ring.
BAD: Too bad he didn't put Benoit over while they were in the ring last night.
BAD: If Austin makes it tonight, I will be totally bullshit. He was arrested in New York and if he isn't there by now, he shouldn't realistically be able to get there.
GOOD: Crash Holly. I just like this little guy.
BAD: He coughs and chokes on the stogie, in spite of the fact that he does not get the it lit.
GOOD: Jericho's band is getting a shot to be on MTV. I have been wanting to hear these guys for a while now.
BAD: Jericho just made enemies with Kane.
GOOD: Jericho versus Regal for the European Title.
BAD: Kane is going to interfere in this match. Can't they find anything better for Jericho to be doing? How about a run for the title?
GREAT: This match lots of great reversals and countermoves. I'd best enjoy it before that fire billows from the ringposts.
YEP: Here comes the Big Red Machine.
BAD: A feud that was started when a guy spilled coffee on another guy? Oh man. Are the writers getting lazy or what?
QUESTION: Trish is still not dressed yet? Her match was a half hour ago! It takes that long to find a sweater?
GOOD: Angle wears the title belt like all good champions should.
A REVELATION: Stephanie is just not attractive...I just realized that right now.
GOOD: The celebration of confetti and balloons.
BAD: Now we have to hear balloons popping the rest of the night...and I bet the cleaning crew is pissed off.
GOOD: Angle's recap of his career to date.
FUNNY: Angle says that sales of scepters and crowns went up 49% after he won the King of the Ring. King ices the cake by saying, "Every time I tried to buy them, they were sold out."
BAD: Just when this segment starts to run a little long, Foley arrives to ensure that it runs a lot longer.
GREAT: Angle/Rock/HHH in a title match tonight.
BAD: We all know some sort of schmozz will cause Angle to retain.
GOOD: It should still be a fun match.
GOOD: Chyna finally gets a measure of revenge on the Ho's for messing with her relationship.
BAD: She shut the door first. Damn!
I WONDER...what Too Cool think of the change in Rikishi. Are they turning heel too? If so, what's taking them so long?
BAD: Isn't it time for Scotty and Sexay to have gimmick changes too? Too Cool's dancing shit has gone on TOO LONG.
GOOD: I like Raven and Tazz. I hope they start winning now.
BAD: This match has, like, no heat.
GOOD: The Worm is broken up not once, but twice! The second time, that Evenflow delivered by Raven was awesome!
GOOD: Edge on his ring gear: "You know what the best thing about my boots is? They say 'Edge' on them." Something about the way he delivered that line cracked me up.
DAMN: I guess Christian did get hurt last night...they concocted an injury angle for him.
UGH: Ass and Chyna do a little dance in the ring for their new opening. The word "sickening" comes to mind.
BAD: He's fighting Val Venis. I have zero interest in this match, as good as Venis may be.
GOOD: Eddie in the house. I love those sinister smirks on his face. Cheat to win!
EH: Ass's first TV match since his injury. I can't say I was all that impressed. At least he didn't get hurt again.
GOOD: HHH insisting that Stephanie stay out of his corner. At least he is consistent.
BAD: The fact that his consistency does not make sense. She will be out at ringside one way or another. He may as well have her in his corner instead of Angle's. Couldn't he have more control under those circumstances?
BAD: If the attack of Christian was a set-up, how did the Dudleys know that only one of them would leave when they sent the message that Foley wanted to see both of them?
WHAT? These two Conquistadors look a little small...could that be Matt and Jeff?
BAD: This whole Conquistadors thing is going to continue?
GOOD: Mick ends it all once and for all and the Hardies get their belts back. Best of all worlds.
EXCUSE ME? Tiger Ali Singh is back? Ugh, I hope he doesn't make people eat disgusting things for money again...
INTERESTING: The champ enters last tonight. How frightfully traditional.
BAD: They wait until almost 11 before starting this match. I hope they don't rush this thing.
EH: This seems to be a pastiche of the last few mixed tags that Angle/Rock/HHH have shared over the past few weeks. I can't say that I am really all that impressed right now.
WHAT? HHH does a stretcher job? We've seen him come back from worse than this. What's the deal here?
COOL: HHH is back in the match! Listen to that face pop!
WHOAH: Boos for Rocky when he pulls HHH out of the ring and cheers when HHH reciprocates a moment later! Now that I didn't expect.
FUCK MAN: The ref lets two belt shots go but calls the match on Rikishi's interference?
AYYY: Austin returns. See above.
GOOD: Okay I popped when Austin ran over Angle on his way to the ring and then delivered a stunner.
BAD: A damn good match ends with a screwjob. Sometimes I hate being a wrestling fan.
OVERALL: Solid night for the WWF. This seemed to sew up a couple of angles as well as start a few new ones. Isn't that what the Monday night after a PPV is for? The Jericho/Regal match and the main event were both quite good until the screwy endings. Austin's appearance at the end of the night was predictable but no less exciting for the crowd on hand. No major complaints.
That's it for this week. I want to end on a serious note. Yokozuna, former WWF World Champion and cousin to Rikishi and The Rock passed away this week in his hotel room. This comes at a bad time as rumors were circulating that the WWF was considering bringing him back to get involved in the Austin/Rock/Rikishi storyline. My sincere condolences go out to his family and friends.
Questions, comments, fire in the hole? Send all correspondence to firstname.lastname@example.org. All letters will be answered or sacrificed to my god.
I am Michaelangelo and will be for a while.Michaelangelo
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