You are here /wrestling
Guest Columns

Rebecca Cerese




Hey All! First off I want to thank Marvelous Martin for mentioning me in his column last week, even if he made me sound like a sick bitch, but I guess I do enough of that on my own. If you haven't already, you should check out his great recap of the UK only PPV from this past Sunday. It actually looks like it was an exciting show.

Onto the Rants. I am not feeling so well today, so excuse me if I start rambling and not making much sense...oh wait that what I usually do anyway, right? Not much to complain about this week, as the Rock was thankfully absent from TV (Sorry Sharon, but you know what I mean), and HHH only participated in a ref capacity (and of course had to bore us to tears with a nonsensical promo). No, I don't hate the Rock so save your hate emails, HHH on the other hand...but truthfully, I was just looking for someone else to take the spotlight for a change. And I got my wish, as last night RAW was truly JERICHO.

Last night the WWF gave Chris Jericho the chance to create his future. With the Rock out filming Mummy 2, Vince and Co. decided to structure the whole show around Jericho. It could have gone one of two ways, it could've gone over huge, or it could've flopped. Chris Jericho made sure it went over. He came out pumped up and on fire. By the end of the night it was very obvious he gave us everything he had to give. He competed in three strenuous contests, and then suffered a brutal beatdown from the overly pushed DX. I have to say I was completely and thoroughly impressed. I think Chris Jericho proved that he belongs in the Heavyweight title picture, and not only that he should be the champion. And oh yeah, Benoit should be there too, competing against Y2J, continuing one of the most intense rivalries I have ever seen.

Ok, so first off I want to talk about this Iron Man Match at Judgement Day. I think this is a terrible idea, and if it weren't for my beloved undercard wrestlers such as the Hardys, the Radicalz (or whatever they will be by the time of the PPV) the Dudleys, 2blondes, etc. I would seriously think of not watching this PPV. I can't think of anything more torturous than watching HHH the man of no moves and no charisma in the ring against the Rock. Like I already mentioned, I think this is a TERRIBLE idea, and of course I will tell you why.

First off, the last Iron Man match was probably one of the greatest contests of all times. In a time when 15 minute matches are considered long, Shawn Michaels and Bret Hart put on an exciting and technically masterful 60 minute match. Plus, even with no pin falls, and they were still able to keep our interest! There will no doubt be comparisons between that match and this new one between HHH and the Rock, and personally, I don't think these two men are up for this kind of match.

Ok, lets first look at HHH: Besides his 3 or 4 knee moves, does the guy have anything else in his repertoire, ok, the Pedigree but that's about it. Ok, true HHH has worked very hard at building up his character. His matches against Mick Foley were excellent, but that was because they were against Mick Foley, who lives to make others look good in the ring, which he did masterfully for HHH, but the Rock is a different story. Rocky is not the best at selling people's moves, and honestly, until Shane McMahon and Stone Cold got involved at Backlash, the Main Event between these two was quite boring, and it wasn't even close to an hour. Rock and HHH don't have what it takes to put on a very exciting match, they don't' have the technical skill, despite what JR still tries to shill about what a great technician HHH is, he isn't plain and simple. The Rock has a few more moves than HHH, and he brings a lot of energy to the ring, but can he sustain this energy over a 60 minute time period? I don't' think so. So basically, I cannot for the life of me understand why they chose this type of match with these two competitors. I knew they were going to have some kind of gimmick match, but I certainly didn't ever expect it would be this one. Hell, if anyone should be having one of these matches it should be Jericho and Benoit. Now them I wouldn't mind watching for an hour, but Rock and HHH... please wake me when its over. Now I may be surprised, and they might be able to pull out a good match, but I highly doubt it.

Is anyone out there as horrified by the sheer boredom factor of this match as me? I just don't see it being a very good contest. Hell to keep my interest for 60 minutes, I need to see more than 3 knee moves and a spinebuster, a samoan drop and the people's elbow. What does that account for maybe 10 minutes if we're lucky? Where do they go from there?

I'm sorry, I know HHH deserves a rematch, but I am so ready for this Rock/McMahon-Helmsley Regime feud to be over. Its boring, its crappy, and it flat out sucks. I mean you look at the kind of matches Jericho delivered on Monday Night, first against Angle, Ok, the Big Show contest was sort of a squash with a messed up ending, but then you ended with the next in a set of incredible matches against Benoit, and you ask me who would I rather see in the Main Event Picture...that's an easy one...Chris Jericho. The man can actually wrestle, plus he is the man on the stick. His comments at the beginning of RAW were hilarious. When he said that Vince McMahon had a small penis, I was about to bust a gut laughing. I know Rock is the champ, but I really want to see a Jericho/HHH feud. I think that Jericho is good enough to carry HHH to a great match, hell it did it once before and he can do it again, then maybe he can go on to feud with the Rock, although I don't really understand how that would work, since they are both faces...

Which leads me to my next question...What the hell are the WWF's plans with the Rock? I mean the only person he is feuding with is HHH. When this is over...please god let it be soon, who will he have to fight next? The logical choice for me would be Chris Benoit. Benoit has proven with his in ring work that he is ready, willing and able to jump up to the Heavyweight title picture, and he should feud with the Rock. I even think he should eventually take the belt from the Rock. Talk about immediate and monstrous HEEL HEAT. This would get Benoit over huge as a heel, and set up what I really want to see...Benoit and Jericho fighting at Summerslam (did I mention I will be in attendance) for the World Heavyweight title. Ok, so I know I am dreaming, but this is what I want to see. I know all the millions and millions of Rock's fans want to see him hold onto the belt forever, but Rock isn't a very exciting champ, he's better when he's going after the belt, and HHH is a great heel but his in ring skills just suck. Ok, enough HHH bashing before I get into trouble.

Next up, I want to talk guessed it Christian. I was so proud that he got a huge asshole chant this Monday night. It means he's doing his job. Of course I will never be able to boo him, but it is great to see him getting over big time with the fans. I cannot say enough how impressed I am with Christian and Edge's mic skills. Honestly, who knew they had it in them. When Christian grabs the mic, its like he's been doing it his whole life, he is calm, clear and absolutely hilarious. His delivery is absolutely perfect. Their whole "posing for the benefit of those with flash photography" is damn hilarious. Ok, so you could tell I am ecstatic that my favorite wrestler is starting to get noticed...FINALLY. It took long enough. Hopefully the WWF will allow his in ring ability to take center stage soon as well. I understand that having them cheat to win is a good way to get them more over as heels, but they shouldn't make it seem that they are incompetent in the ring, because that is just false. At some point soon, they also need to get back to feuding with the Dudleys and the Hardys. I know it is coming eventually, so I will not complain. I hope Christian and Edge keep up the good work and continue getting the huge crowd reaction from all their "adoring" fans.

Just a quick note on mine and Sharon's favorite team the Hardys. I actually read one internet reporter call them the slumping Hardys. My eyes basically popped out of my head on this one. The slumping Hardys? If slumping means not in the Tag Team Title race anymore, well I can buy that. But if slumping means not putting on good matches, I have to strongly disagree there. I mean the Hardys come out and put on excellent matches every single week. Every week they put their bodies on the line to entertain us. Now personally, I don't think the WWF has been giving them long enough matches, but hell I could watch them for 30-40 minutes and still want more, so maybe I am biased. But I swear it seemed like their match against the Radicals was about 3 minutes long. Now I know the deeper story was the problems between Perry and Dean, but still, you have these 4 men in the ring and you should just let them go at it... I still think it is ridiculously stupid that the Hardys are not stalking Edge and Christian for the tag team titles. What do the Hardys suddenly not want the titles? Do they not remember their very intense rivalry with Edge and Christian? I know the WWF isn't really big on continuity sometimes...ok a lot of the times, but his is bordering on ridiculous. Instead it looks like Too Cool is going to be the next big opponent for Edge and Christian and I think this sucks...Too Cool are way over because of their dancing and the stupid Worm, but they do not deserve to be the Champions...The three teams who I feel are worthy are 2Blondes, the Hardys and the Dudleys. They need to bring back one of these feuds and do it quickly.

Ok, while on the subject of tag team, what was up with JR shamelessly shilling X-Puke and Road Dogg as "for his money the greatest tag team in the WWF right now." What the hell is up with this? First off, isn't JR a face announcer, then why is he shilling a heel team? Also why is he shilling DX at all? X-Puke and Road Dogg are not even fit to shine any of the three aforementioned teams shoes. And for my money, I would say that backstage politics and being friends with HHH who seems to be exerting a lot of influence lately has a lot to do with this shameless and unwarranted push of these two guys. (I am sorry Heather, I know you love Road Dogg but this is a little ridiculous.)

Ok, so I am done with the WWF right now, and I want to quickly talk about the ECW. I realize I have not talked about ECW in a long while, although I am still a loyal supporter, and I tape ECW on TNN every single week. I have to say I am drooling over the prospect of an RVD/Jerry Lynn rematch at this weekend's PPV Hardcore Heaven. Even if no other good matches were on the card, I would tune in just to see this one. I am so happy to see Jerry Lynn and RVD finally back from their injuries, and I think the way they wrote it in to the storylines was great. Jerry Lynn is another guy who I will never be able to boo, because I just think the guy is so amazing. So here's hoping for another excellent contest between the two on Sunday, and I know I will be watching, and if you like great matches, you should watch too. I also assume they are going to do some kind of tag team tournament to crown new tag team champions after Justin Credible threw down the belts two weeks ago. This should be good, esp. if say a certain insane Japanese Buzzsaw Tajiri teams with Super Crazy. Now I think they would be awesome tag team champions. And oh yeah, the Main Event ain't to shabby either, with a four way dance between ex-Tag Team Champions Lance Storm and Justin Credible and sometimes friends sometimes mortal enemies, Tommy Dreamer and Raven. If nothing else it should be quite an intense contest. So check it out!

That's all for me today, my nose is runny, and my throat is scratchy, so excuse me if this column isn't that great. Oh yeah, make sure to read the other great columns on this website, including the always great Sharon's Edge, Heather Birkett's returning column, It used to be called In the Zone, I don't know if she's still calling it that, and all the rest, there all good.

Thanks for reading, and I would love to hear your opinions about the Iron Man write me.

Rebecca Cerese
[slash] wrestling

Mail the Author



Design copyright (C) 1999, 2000 Christopher Robin Zimmerman & KZiM Communications
Guest column text copyright (C) 2000 by the individual author and used with permission