You are here /wrestling
/Cubs Fan
Guest Columns

The Cubs Fan



Ultimate Pro Wrestling

I'm so close to being, so close.

For you who don't get America One (or don't check out their live feed on, Ultimate Pro Wrestling is a collection of early 90s matches from USWA, GWF, World Class and parts in between. It's only a half hour show, so they don't have time explain why the matches they have are going.

This week, they've got footage featuring Wild Bill Irwin in Global, Chris Walker vs Sweet Daddy ? and from the USWA, Hollywood John Tatum vs Bill Dundee.

Hollywood John Tatum vs Bill "Superstar" Dundee (w/ woman) for the USWA Southern Heavyweight Title (Dallas, Texas, 1990) - They have a graphic, but don't mention her name. Dundee's the Southern Heavyweight champion, while Tatum is a "changed man." Let's here him tell you: "Bill Dundee, I know what I've done in the past has been low down, I know I shouldn't beat a woman, I know all the things I've done in the past were wrong. I shouldn't done them. I got myself some help. I've gone out and I've been, I bought myself some self help improvement guides and I've been studying, and I've learned that what I did was wrong, and if you'll just - no, I mean it! I mean it! Tessa, just look at me, just look at me, I'm sorry for everything I did to you Bill Dundee - I'm sorry for running your head into the pole and busting you open like a pig. I'm sorry, I'll pay the doctor bills, I'll pay for each stitch, I'll pay for each and every one of them. No, I mean it! Shut up! I mean it! I'm gonna show you Tessa, starting right now, I'm a changed man. I have totally changed, Bill Dundee, I really got nothing against you, except you took the woman I love, and you're really not a good person. You're really not a good person. And I just want to show you - I'll never cheat again, I'll never do anything to hurt anyone again, and I promise, and I promise, and I'll show you right now, okay? Just give me the chance to show you, okay? Stand there and watch and I'll show you, okay? I've changed everything about myself." Dundee parts the ropes for Tessa to leave, there's the bell. Tatum talks to Tessa some. Stalling in a Bill Dundee match? Tatum wants a handshake, but Dundee won't go. So he talks to the camera. And then tries again. They discuss. He was in love, but he's really changed. Hand shake goes fine. Circle. Tatum leans out of the ring and shakes a security guard's hand. And hugs both the camera men on the apron. He goes for a hug with the ref, but the ref escapes. "I love everyone." Dundee talks trash on the mic. Two minutes after the bell rung, we've got a lockup. Dundee with an armbar. Tatum reverses and takes him down. Tatum thinks about a stomp to the head, but hesitates and Dundee's already up and reversing the armbar. Reversed back by Tatum, Dundee with a n arm drag to take him down. Working on the arm. Tatum back up, to the ropes for a break. He wants another handshake. Dundee doesn't want it. The announcers actually called it "the Hand of  Friendship." Headlock by Dundee, off the ropes, shoulderblock by Tatum. Dundee falls all the way to the floor. Tatum is...parting the ropes to allow Dundee back in. He wants another shake, but no. Dundee talks to Tessa. Tatum talks to the fans. Lockup, armdrag by Dundee, Tatum up and looking for a handshake. Tatum claps for Dundee. Four minutes in. Lockup, headlock take down cover for 0. Another handshake, but no. Double thumbs up. Tatum talks to Tessa. Lockup, off the ropes, drop down, drop down, drop down, shoulderblock, Dundee falls out of the ring and onto Tessa. Dundee checks on her, while Tatum pulls something out of his tights - a chain. Perhaps he's done with the handshakes. Dundee is helping Tessa to a chair as Tatum hides chain - there's a shot to the head, slips them into his tights, and covers - 3 count. (5:17) That's either the worse match ever or the best. Also, Hollywood John Tatum is your new Southern Heavyweight Champion. Tessa comes in the ring as we go to break. This is one of five title changes these two have in summer and fall of this year, so no clue on the exact date.

Chris Walker vs Sweet Daddy Falcone (Global Wrestling Federation) - Lockup, head lock by Sweet, off the ropes, shoulderblock by Chris Walker is a muscle freak so he no sells. Off the ropes, shoulderblock, no sell by Falcone. Lockup turns in a battle for strength, headlock by Falcone. The announcers are talking about the CWF and Major League Wrestling, so I'm confused. Walker can't break out of the devastating headlock. But he eventually does. Falcone claims hair pull. Circle. Lockup. Off the ropes, shoulderblock is no sold, Falcone keeps running, drop down, leap frog, armdrag, armdrag. Names dropped about people to come later: Axl Rotten, Jim Cornette, Stan Lane, Scott Hudson. Arm bar by Walker. To the ropes, shot by Falcone, whip, armdrag. Armbar. Eyepoke to escape by Falcone. Forearm, right, right, "Go Chris Go" chant, right, right, chop, is that Nick Patrick as the ref, right, whip, clothesline. slam, fall behind by Chris, roll up but Falcone grabs the ropes, Harris is slow to get up to take the clothesline. Into the corner, corner whip, walk up and a right, right, corner whip, charging splash comes up empty. Walker to the top, almost losses his balance, cross body for 3. (5:22) Those matches were nearly the same length but so different.

Wild Bill Irwin vs Chris Germany (Global Wrestling Federation) - Bill Irwin is Belvis Wesley in ECW now, right? Or is he still there? Would any one notice? Lockup, into the corner, shot to the chest by Bill. More shots, whip, hard knee to the midsection. Bodyslam. Stomp. Corner whip, clothesline follow. Running stomp. Snap mare. Now they're calling it "International Professional Wrestling" and I'm even more confused. Chin lock. Hair pull. Germany gets up with kicks but Bill punches him a bunch. Turnbuckle shot. Snap suplex. Body slam. Up to the second rope, elbow drop. Kick to the stomach. Wild Bill is talking throughout this. Headlock. "I've never seen anyone who's submitted to a side headlock!" Thumb to the eye! Whip, side backbreaker, one hand cover, Irwin picks it up to continue. Shots to the back, thrown to the outside. Irwin doesn't follow. Germany up to apron, stun gun by Wiles. Back up to the apron and brought in the hard way. Eye poke. Eye rake. Whip, clothesline misses, scissors kick connects (4:27)

Next week, the Missing Link, the Rock and Roll RPMs, and the Lighting Kid! I wish I had THAT week instead. That's what this show is - sometime you get interesting wastes of time like that Dundee/Tatum match, some time you get "hey, it's that guy I know now a long time ago" like that Lighting Kid match would be, and sometimes you get total pieces of junk, like our second and third matches. Best to watch the first segment to see what's on before you waste the whole half hour.

The Cubs Fan
DDT Digest

Mail the Author
Visit DDT Digest



Design copyright (C) 1999 Christopher Robin Zimmerman & KZiM Communications
Guest column text copyright (C) 1999 by the individual author and used with permission