You are here /wrestling
Guest Columns

The Outsider




So here I am... back after a week off during the Thanksgiving rush.... did you miss me?

Well, lets just dive right into the thick of things. CRZ hit the nail right on the head a couple of weeks ago commenting on the lack of musical guests on Sunday Night Heat. This was the origin of my music/wrestling column so I found myself at a loss on the topic - of course, everything worked itself out in the end. Of course, now this just makes Heat a program seeming out of place on the music based network (even though there's hardly any music on MTV anymore anyway-- and that a whole other topic).

This of course segues nicely into the whole Tazz as an announcer. It was pretty cool and he does do a great job, but I think it hurts his in ring persona. See, he's supposed to be this badass, and when he first debuted he didn't say much but he kicked some ass. I thought his style was progressing nicely over the initial tenure, but over all Tazz seems to have been buried... well, there's no seems to... he has been.

And the problem is, he was built up as a badass, and now he plays a Bobby Heenan type character, and in feuds with Jerry Lawler. The best way to deal with everything would have been to have him no sell those Lawler piledrivers (which was so cool when it happened) and just go on a tear leading into the Intercontinental title scene... he would have been elevated, and if Raven came in at that point he too would not have been left hung out in nowhere land. Both guys in my opinion would make a great addition to the upper card, even if it is pretty saturated right now. I don't believe there can ever be too many guys if they're all built up correctly and the story lines are done well.

Best case in point for the previous argument would be Angle and Hunter fighting over Steph and Rock with the belt. Right there was the possibility for four main eventers to have powerful storylines, and two more wouldn't have been that big a deal (unless there was sloppy development).

Enough with the theoretical. Since Steiner won the belt over in wcw I figured I'd check out some of nitro. It wasn't THAT bad... but at the same time there's nothing more disheartening then watching sloppy wrestling. Like that Lance Storm match. Sometimes guys just aren't on the same page, or having an off day, or something... but watching missed spots and so on doesn't make me want to continue watching.

There's still so much wrong with angles like MIA which I still think is dumb, and Lex Luger who I just think is old.. And Sid fucking coming out of nowhere. I read about who Sid can still pop a crowd or how this is a great idea, but I only had two words when it happened, and two words now. WHO CARES? I know I don't... and no one did last time Sid was champ either. And as for the cliffhanger ending making me want to watch Thunder to see what happened... a) I figured the outcome was pretty obvious, and b) it was the main reason I didn't watch Thunder. Best move in this case is for Steiner to ANNIHILATE Sid Goldberg style... but I almost 100% sure Sid would NEVER go for that one... hit another softball you non-wrestling fuck!

Random Note number 1: I'd love for Goodfather to do one of two things: either be the one behind the whole RTC thing because he was brainwashing everyone to begin with; with a storyline playing out involving his Papa Shango past... OR.... just have him leave and come back as Papa Shango... that was a cool gimmick.

So Raw was so-so... I was entertained for the most part but bored over all... I love watching Austin get all wrestle-ing-ly on us... and Kurt is entertaining even when he screws up in the opening speeches... (heheh)... but I think HHH was brought back way too quick. It's a shame really because as Hollywood as the angle was it could've been played out and ended up really cool. Instead, the whole angle comes off as ultra illogical. I'm hoping there ends up being proof that HHH somehow got out of the car at the last second or something, even though I can't imagine how they'd do it. But everyone's right, with people like Hardcore Holly and Undertaken leaving to nurse injury for months at a time, HHH should have at least been off for a couple of weeks, even if it's just to make storylines more logical.

I'm also really disappointed that the WWF is going to attempt to totally blowoff this love triangle, after it was the best and biggest angle all year. What shame, there was some much to do with it, so many places to go, and instead they just killed it. (Well, actually, I'm hoping I'm wrong and there's so grand scheme, but I think not.)

As for Tiger Ali-Singh being in the second to last match of the night... well, all I can say is throughout the duration of the match I continuously questioned WHY while screaming at my roommate how illogical it was... he doesn't watch wrestling so it was wasted on him, but what can you do.

As for good things (and a list like this will never eeeeever consist of any mention of K-Kwick of Road Dogg) December's main event looks frigging awesome. I need to find some way to get the pay-per-view just to see this match. Of course, it does have the potential to be a cluster fuck but I have hope.

Random Note number 2: Bear with on this, because I've been meaning to talk about it for weeks but kept forgetting to... . I was watching an old tape of the Rockers and was surprised how Shawn Michaels rose to the top of the roster years later. I'm a big fan of the smaller guys that can hold their own with the bigger men. I don't think we need huge guys holding the belt... it looks good but it's not totally necessary. That's not to say I didn't love Paul Wight holding the championship strap.

Still, an underdog like Crash (though I don't necessarily like him persay) is fun to watch and could come off as a good champ given the opportunity. With that said (as you all wonder where I'm going with this)... I'd love for Jeff Hardy to get a run at the top of the company for a time. He'd be so cool holding the strap and being a cocky silent champ that people dug... and he'd get his ass kicked a lot but bust out some high risk high flying moves and win in the end.

See, the initial win would be flukish, but he'd prove himself in the long run. Even cooler would be a win of Wight in a couple of months.

Well, there you have it.... no great music has been released in the past couple of weeks. I picked up some of the Pearl Jam concerts that went on sale a while ago. And everyone should go check out New Found Glory. And since I was talking about the Rockers, my retro pick for the week will be Entombed just because there's never anything wrong with kickass thrash metal.

Pointless Plug: If you don't go check out Rebecca's Rant too, because her columns totally rule.

I think I may have pop, but I hope not...(!?)


The Outsider


Mail the Author



Design copyright (C) 1999, 2000 Christopher Robin Zimmerman & KZiM Communications
Guest column text copyright (C) 2000 by the individual author and used with permission