|WWF Sunday Night Heat by The Cubs Fan
You know, I forget to stop taping Worldwide's old slot - I got a used car infomercial and a Cleo infomercial. I should've recapped them, but no.
Here's a look at Commissioner William Regal's action since getting that position.
LIVE! WWFNY! (the NY stands for New York!) Michael Cole and Tazz! William Regal hasn't showed up yet! Joey Numbers hasn't seen him either! Cameras are ready to show him arriving!
Haku vs Raven (w/WWF The Music Volume 5) - Cole says "Spike Dudley, of the Dudley Boyz" just in case you weren't sure. Tazz says it was the best Wrestlemania evah. Nova and Raven should have formed some sort of tag team in ECW. Lockup, yea, Raven's not winning that. Beatdown in the corner. Haku backs off, then goes back to work, pummeling corner whip, reversed, off the ropes clothesline from Raven. Kick. Off the ropes Haku is slowly clothesline d out, but then right back on the apron to get the sliding dropkick. Russian legsweep into the barrier. Raven tries for the DDT but Haku picks him up and runs him back first into the corner. And now into the apron. Right. I think Raven's actually a Holly, the way he's just fighting super heavyweights. Also, the similar winning records. Back into the stairs and thrown in. Right, right, headbutt drops Raven. Stomp to the midsection. Raven gets up and gets kicked. Chop, chop, bearhug. OH MAN IT'S NITRO ALL OVER AGAIN - we cut to a limo pulling up. Back in the match, Haiku runs Raven in to the corner, then kicks him. Headbutt. Right. Raven fights back with a Bob Holly patented "kick from the corner to escape the beat down", then he hits the Bronco Billie special (corner whip/clothesline/bulldog.) Mr. Wrestling #1 Knee Lift! Bulldog! Right, right, right, right, right, right, pulled off by the ref and there's the Tongan Death Grip, pushed down for the pin. (3:36) He won't let go! But then he will. Fear Tonga!
The announcers talk - tonight, we'll get the singles debut of Spike Dudley, facing, um...Lita? Whatever. Moments ago, Regal just did get out of the limo, and yelled at the limo driver for making him late. Then he can't get past the fans.
Wow, they're really mixing it up this week - we're doing the "hosts addresses the crowd from the stage in the SECOND segment. The fans should be happy that he's there. If it wasn't for the horrible New York streets and cab drivers, he'd be here on time. Order is what is needed in New York, and the WWF. "Y2J" chant. Regal compliments Vince. Vince brought us Regal as commissioner, Wrestlemania X-Seven (the best pay per view ever), and a suspended Rock. That doesn't go over to well. Tonight, because Regal cares about the fans, he'll take suggestions from them about how to better the WWF.
The announcers speculate on the changes - Tazz offers to take Regal to Red Hook and make some changes. Also, the roads are better in New York than Scotland. Later tonight, Spike Dudley versus Lita.
It's a little late for tea time. Anyway, Regal calls back security for being touched by the fans on the way in - and now, to the merchandise stand.
Michael Cole tries to start something with Tazz about Regal dissing New York, but he's not going for it.
Dean Malenko and Perry Saturn (w/a yellow and black floppy hat and a pink and black Terri) vs APA (w/o Jackie) - Does Jackie only work every other week or something? Saturn whips Faarooq into the barricade on the outside, but Bradshaw shoulderblocks Dean to to the outside. Faarooq has takes control, shot to the stairs, thrown in and Bradshaw holds him for punches. Whip, double shoulderblock, Faarooq covers for a delayed 2. Whip, back elbow, shot for Dean. Faarooq goes for the Dominator, Saturn slips out, push into the ropes, Dean gets a shot and Saturn his a belly to belly suplex. Tag to Dean, pick up, whip, jumping heel kick. Tag to Saturn, double team kick down in the corner. Saturn with knees while Faarooq's on the mat. Tag to Dean, well, they do it twice to make sure it counts again, Corner whip on Faarooq, corner whip on Saturn but his clothesline misses, Dean gets clotheslined on the follow up and Saturn's powerslamed. Tag to Bradshaw, in with a big boot for Dean. Off the ropes, back elbow. Whip, clothesline misses, cross body is caught big boot for Saturn and blockbuster slam on Dean. Picking Dean back up, powerbomb try is stopped before it can even start because of a Saturn superkick. Dean with a shot to the ribs, kick to the back, tag to Saturn. Dean with a slam, Saturn with a slightly froggy splash - he may have tripped a bit on the way off, but it still hit. 2 count. Saturn pulls Bradshaw up and decides to do a punching battle with Bradshaw, that doesn't work so well, so Saturn tires a whip, but the clothesline misses and Bradshaw hits a diving shoulderblock. Race to the tag, Faarooq in, shot for Saturn, shot for Dean, whip for Saturn, no that's reversed into a kick and the moss covered three handed family grudnuza (corkscrew suplex with bridge) but Bradshaw it up at two. The ref tells him to get out and Malenko knocks Bradshaw down as he leaves the ring, and the Radicals double team stomp Down Faarooq - both off the ropes but Bradshaw pulls out Dean, and Saturn runs right into a spinebuster, cover for three. (4:09)
At the merchandise area, Regal ejects the Rock shirts ("he doesn't even work here anymore!" - hmm) and the Y2J jerseys - this is a much better place to stick Triple H and Steve Austin stuff, you see.
Backlash is in Chicago, and William Regal is with the announcers - why are they dressed so bad? Michael Cole shows off his shoes for no particular reason. Cole is trying to stir more trouble up between Tazz and Regal and Tazz is just to tally blowing him off. Anyway, Regal's around to talk about this match
Eddie Guerrero vs this is a Test for Europeo el Título - Regal says Eddie is worthy champion, unlike the other guy. Regal on Test: "He's got one of those faces that I would never get tired of . Now Regal's getting on Tazz about New York. Lockup, Eddie wins(!) and punches Test in the corner. Whip, back elbow. Eddie motions that he can't quite hear that Eddie sucks chant, could they make it louder? They can! Right, right, whip, no reversed, press slam, no Eddie falls behind into a waistlock, Test gets to the ropes and turns around to try a clothesline but Eddie ducks by and then charges right o right into tilt a whirl side slam for a 2 count. Whip, flapjack. Gutwrench powerbomb, cover for 2. Steve Austin will not be punished for what he did to Jim Ross. Eddie whips Test hard into the corner, and then kicks him down and yells at the crowd. Right, right, right, right, choke in the corner. "Come on Gringo!" Turnbuckle smash. Cole mocks Tazz's sucking up. Turnbuckle shot is stopped and reversed by Test - I think he was going for ten there but no one was counting. Eddie is staggered and down after a right, cover for 2. Cole called Test a "charismatic youngster" like he's K-Kwik or something. Right, right, right, right, right, stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp. Eddie sucks. Corner whip, press slam and Eddie is thrown in the corner. Test signal for the big boot, but no Eddie slides to his knees and begs off, can he get a handshake? Test slaps his hand away, and Eddie slowly gets back to his feet, offering again. So, justified, Eddie slugs at Test, but it's ducks and Test's right isn't. Clothesline. Whip, tilt-a-whirl, no flying headscissors, no tilt-a-whirl powerbomb by Test! One two thr-no but the crowd thought so. Test is gonna go for the Meltdown, but Eddie slips behind, pushes Test into the ref, hits the low blow and rolls him up for one two three. (4:47) Test isn't to happy - there's the big boot, now that it doesn't matter. Test he grabs the belt - holding it up as he's holding his injured part, nice. Next, Regal, Q&A with the fans.
The Foot Locker Jeff Hardy Being Broken In Half By Edge's Super Spear Of The Week
Lita (w/Jeff and Matt) vs Spike Dudley (w/Bubba and D-Von) - Lockup. Spike pushes Lita in the corner, but we get a clean break. "Piss" is bleeped. Headlock by Lita, off the ropes, shoulderblock is NO SOLD by Spike. Maybe because it was bad. Off the ropes, Spike drops down and gets an elbow drop. Oklahoma Roll for 2. Small package for 2. UGLY crucifix for 2. Spike rolls out to think about just how ugly that was. The Acid Drop is now the Dudley Dog. Test of strength, and Spike wins, but Lita gets in a headbutt shot and flips to a position of advantage to push Spike all the way down, double stomp on the feet, dropkick, cover for 2. Right from Lita! Whip, flying headscissors by Lita. Right, right (ugly), whip, head down too soon, swinging neckbreaker by Spike. Forward Leg Sweep Cradle for 2. Are they having some sort of bizarre rollup contest with Crash? Corner whip, follow in, Lita kips up but misses a clothesline, Spike hits a swinging one and covers for 2. Turnbuckle shot is blocked and Spike gets one, right, right, blocked, slam no Lita falls on top for 2. Whip, reversed, pickup no flying headscissors, no hot shot by Spike. Spike going up, no Jeff going to the apron to distract the ref so Matt can pull his girlfriend out of the way. Lita going all the way up now D-Von up so Bubba can crotch her and now it's ON with the tag teams. Meanwhile, Spike's going for a top rope 'rana, but gets low blowed - Lita goes back up Moonsault, one two three! (4:08) That's not a good sign when you're losing your debut match.
Regal yells at the chefs to make food more of his liking.
The Foot Locker (again?) Jim Ross Beatdown of the Night
What's going to happen tomorrow night when Linda confronts Vince? What's gonna happen with this Q&A stuff when we've got much left?
Regal is on the stage and looking stunned at the "Regal Sucks" chants. He opens it to suggestions - the first guy says that we need WWF and WCW guys facing off, but Regal can't comment on that situation. The second guy wants Austin punished for hurting Jim Ross, but Regal already said no. The first woman proposes convincing Linda to reinstate Mick Foley. "Why would we want him back? The man changes his clothes less than Fred Flintstone" - Foley chant. Oh no, here's the Germ - he's kissing up to the Regal in a British accent. Regal dresses him down and says he doesn't need any help, he's already the best commissioner you ever had. The next guy says that he should - that he needs to reinstate the Rock. Cue Rock chant - but he disrespected Mr. McMahon, Austin and the WWF. "So, as far as I'm concerned, the Rock will NEVER be reinstated" and we end right as he's finishing that word.The Cubs Fan
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