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WCW Greed

Alex Carnevale




If this was the last WCW PPV effort, I wanted to be there when the ship went down.

I flip back and forth between the pre-game show and Heat. Notably, the Steiner v. DDP main event match has been changed to falls count anywhere. That can't be good. There's a neat Benoit v. Haku match on Heat, which I watch. Jesus, WM is going to be great. With Rock v. Austin, Regal v. Jericho, Benoit v. Angle, HHH v. Undertaker and tag title title spotfest, there could be FOUR ****+ matches on the card.

In the pre-show interview, DDP is off the wall douche. He is such a miserable interview.

We start off with a bonus match. How hard would it have been to book this on fucking Thunder?

Kwee-Wee v. Jason Jett. This should be good. Jett starts us off with a plancha no. 1 on the night. Hudson- "We built our name on veteran wrestler." Yeah, and you died by them. Twisting legdrop splash by Skyfire. Jett applies a funky-looking surfboard variation. Funk blows a spot per match, and this is no exception, as he fucks up a reversal sequence. Hair beal from the ring to the floor by Kwee-Wee. Funk misses a tope, and Jett sells hemorroidal damage. Matt Hardy-Benoit-DDT-off-the-apron spot from Jett to Funk. I remember that RAW like it was yesterday. Kwee-Wee takes the flipping clothesline as well as the standing moonsault for two. Jett takes the Shawn Michaels holy-shit bump off a backdrop, and the cameraman catches a cool-looking shot of it. Jett takes an upside down bump to the railing and KW throws Jett into Penzer. Lot of Shawn Michaels influence on this match. Slingshot splash for two. Thesz press for two. KWEE-WEE SUCKS chant. Nice character stuff from Funk. Jett tries to battle out of a sleeper, but KW hits a slam for two. Vertical suplex for two. Super rana out of a powerbomb attempt gets two for Kwee-Wee. Whoa. E-C-DUB! Swinging facebuster for two. KW sets up a piledriver, but Jett lowblows out. Shockwave and Jett goes for The Crash Landing, but Kwee-Wee hits a springboard sunset flip for two. Neat sequence leads to a Funk Northern lights suplex for two. Kwee-Wee goes out of the ring on a collision, and Jett plays possum. Funk misses whatever, and Jett hits The Crash Landing (high angle release vertical suplex) for three. ***3/4 Great match. Lacked a killer ending, but that was really, really impressive, and the crowd was into it. Both Jett and Funk tore it up there. Bitching opener.

The show the cruiser tag belts, which look good.

Kidman & Rey Mysterio Jr v. Kid Romeo & PrimeTime, Cruiserweight Tag Titles. Kidman comes in with a tiger scissors, but takes the powerbomb facebuster from Kid Romeo and then the inverted powerbomb into a splash combination from the heels. Kidman hits a rana and tags Rey-Rey, who attacks with a slingshot legdrop to kill Romeo off the ropes. PrimeTime decks Rey but takes a rana for his troubles. Rey takes over Elix out of ring, and the faces hit him with an assisted baseball slide. Romeo makes the save on the outside. They battle near the entranceway, as the faces hiptoss PrimeTime into Kid Romeo on the lower level. They run and deck the heels with stereo Thesz presses. Back in the ring, the faces hit a double chokeslam for two. PrimeTime hits a knee smash. Tag, and Kid Romeo hits a short arm clothesline, chops, chops, takes chops, takes the Raven-off-the-ropes clothesline bit from Kidman. Romeo hits the Rey bulldog out of the inverted powerbomb bit and applies a chinlock. Way to go. Romeo slaps on a gourdbuster for two. Elix is in, and the heels work over the champs by cheating to win. Uninspired brawling, and Elix takes a top rope spinebomb. Rey in, and he applies a swinging DDT, with PrimeTime taking an admirable Bret Hart bump to the post. Rey hits two consecutive highspots including a plancha, making that the second plancha of the night. Romeo hits a plancha to make it 3. Kidman almost kills himself with the SSPress to the outside, making that 4, because I'm lenient. PrimeTime and Rey to the top, Rey hits a sunset slip powerbomb for two. Primetime tries a dragon suplex, but hits a hangmanplex. Kidman brings the reverse suplex to Romeo, but PrimeTime tosses Kidman and hits a Tiger Suplex, and holds onto it as Romeo hits a South Beach Jam. May I say, wow! Kidman hits the second rope bulldog for two, and the faces hit the powerbomb-splash combination. Poetry in Motion followed up by the assisted baseball slide to the penis. Ruff Ryder follows that. They set up the Wassup drop, but Rey comes off into a Thesz press on the standing Romeo. PrimeTime hits a body scissors to take Bill Kidman out of the ring. Rey tries a Lionsault, but Romeo catches him and plants him with The Last Kiss for three in what has to be deeming a pretty shocking upset. ***1/2 Best match of the tournament because of the time, but still kind of a disappointment. It lacked energy until the last few minutes.

The Mag Seven discusses who will turn form the group. Steiner may turn on Nitro, but I wouldn't bet on it.

Stacy comes out. Stacy- "Next time I come out, I want a bigger ovation." There's so many jokes to be made, I don't know where to start. Stasiak is in pink, and perhaps needless to say, a YOU SUCK DICK chant starts up. Rick Rude died; I thought his gimmick would as well.

Bam Bam Bigelow v. Shawn Stasiak. This could use an exploding death match stipulation. Shawn bails early, no surprise. I console myself with thoughts of Benoit v. Angle, WM X-SEVEN. Bammer hits the top rope headbutt for two. Stasiak sprays Bam Bam with hairspray and gives him the Rude Awakening for the pin. 1/4* I hate that ending so, so much. They kept it short, at least. PerfectShawn and Stacy make out post match.

Various homosexual-undertones stuff with Kid Romeo and PrimeTime in the back.

The Cat tells Ms. Jones to stay in the back during his match.

Team Canada v. The Dungeon of Doom. Faces storm the heels to start. Awesome is in on Morrus. Morrus no-sells chops in the corner, and hits a powerslam for two. Big legdrop from Awesome for two. Avalanche, and the British Bulldogs work over Morrus. Double KO bit just a few minutes into the match is patently unnecessary. Awesome and K-Dog collide next. I can barely contain myself. K-Dog tries the 187, but Awesome kicks his fucking teeth in. Konnan is the face in peril for the entire match. He tries a small package for to, but Awesome kicks out. Top rope clothesline for two. Dropkick for two. Storm slaps on a sleeper, proving my claim that he is nowhere near the worker some have made him out to be, and works the front chancery. Awesome hits a piledriver for two. Ouch, that was FMW quality. Storm tries a top rope elbow, but eats K-Dog's foot. Double clothesline spot. Morrus in, and the crowd is dead. Spinkick for two. Avalanche. Avalanche. Storm hits the superkick. Awesome splash - 1, 2, no. K-Dog tosses Morrus, and Awesome eats a release German suplex. Morrus tries the moonsault, but Storm interrupts and schools Konnan into the running Awesomebomb for three. Good ending. **1/2 Everybody dogged it but Awesome. At least they got the booking right.

O'Haire and Palumbo cut a lame, lame promo.

In a rare production slip-up, the CW title match is deemed a CW Tag Title match. They also fuck up Suga Shane's music.

Shane Helms v. Chavo Guerrero Jr, Cruiserweight Title. Shane's in tights tonight, babeeee! Match starts at 9:10. They do my favorite warm up spot, where Bret holds onto the headlock as Shawn tries to break out of it. Those two are all over this show, and wrestling in general today. They do a nice-looking mutual respect sequence. Chavo clothesline sets up a belly-to-back attempt, but Shane hits a gutbuster and the flying fistdrop. Shane goes for The Final Cut, but Chavo hits a T-Bone suplex for two. Chavo transitions nicely into a stepover abdominal stretch. Chavo works over the leg, which goes nowhere, but is nice to see. He whips out the bridging deathlock and wrenches on the knee. Shane comes out but eats a backdrop suplex for two. Slugfest, and Chavo tries to flip over and pin Helms, but he bridges out. Chavo tries a powerbomb, but Helms hits a DDT. 1, 2, no. Chavo dropkicks him into the corner. Pumphandleplex for two. Chavo goes for the brainbuster - which the announcers don't sell - but hits a nasty plancha (no. 5) and rolls Sugar Shane back in for two. Brainbuster attempt no. 2, but Shane reverses to the fireman's carry facebuster. Swinging neckbreaker, no cover. Double KO. they fight over stuff, and Chavo unleashes a sit-down inverted implant DDT (I know) for two. Tornado DDT attempt is blocked, and Chavo tries a Meltdown but takes the Nightmare for two. Chavo takes a Shawn-style bump outside. Helms does - you guessed it - a plancha (no. 6) and generates a flying bodypress in the ring for two. Scoop slam, but Shane is crotched on the top for two. Up top again, and Chavo manages a Vertebraeker attempt, reversed for three. New champ. Disappointing match compared to the other one, but still decent. *** Anemic pop for the win, by the way. It seemed like there was too much time spent going for moves instead of doing them, and guys don't like teases. I can attest.

Luger + Buff get promo time.

Totally Buffed v. Sean O'Haire & Chuck Palumbo, WCW Tag Titles. This one is basically a two minute squash for the champs, which is a big fuck you to Goldberg from Luger + Buff, I guess. "You gave us heat, watch us throw it away on the next you." O'Haire finishes with the Seanton Bomb. DUD, but it pleased me. Buff teases a neck injury, but Luger + Buff finally just make their way to the back.

The Cat v. Chris Kanyon. They brawl at the entranceway to start. Cat almost skins the cat, but then just rolls back in. Ernest Miller has improved a hundred percent since he debuted. Cat catches Kanyon in an electric chairdrop. Cool. Taka-style dropkick from Cat, and he tosses Kanyon. Kanyon takes the upside-down bump to the safety rail. Cat misses whatever off the top for two. Suplex sets up a Kanyon slingshot elbow for two. Top rope fameasser for two. If Kanyon can do it, why can't Billy Gunn? Sleeper spot, but Cat quickly backdrop suplexes out. Double KO. Swinging neckbreaker from Kanyon for two. He gets violently crotched on the top, however, and Cat breaks out a second rope vertical suplex for two. Kanyon tries a sunset flip, but is caught and elbow-dropped for two. Superkick for two. Kanyon tries to Flair-pin the Cat, but the ref sees his feet on the ropes. Roll-up for two. Cat tries a piledriver, but Kanyon hits a spinebuster into a Boston crab. Cat reaches the ropes. Feliner, 1, 2, Kanyon's foot is on the ropes. WHAT RING AWARENESS! Cat is tossed, but he's back in. Kanyon reverses a belly-to-back suplex for two. Ref bump, and Ms. Jones comes into the ring. Cat holds Kanyon. Ms. Jones misses Kanyon and nails Ernest Miller. Ms. Jones fights Kanyon, and Cat hits another Feliner for the pin. ***1/4 Great ending sequence saved it from mediocrity. Good booking. Kanyon punks Cat out afterwards. Ice Train's music plays, and he comes out with a chair as Kanyon bails.


Dusty eats burritos backstage to prepare for his Kiss My Ass match. Seriously.

This whole show strikes me as a WWF audition. I think Steiner and DDP will turn it up as a result.

Booker T (heat) v. Rick Steiner (no heat), US Title. God, Rick Steiner is suck a big fat fucking joke. Steinerline - 1, 2, NO! HE KICKED OUT OF THE DEVASTATING STEINERLINE! Tigerbomb for two. Chinlockery erupts and the crowd could give a shit. In between resthold after stupid fucking resthold, Booker tries to put together a match. Booker sells like a champ. Hey, maybe the WWF will hire Booker to do The Rock's selling for him. Desperation belly-to-back suplex, but Steiner hits a belly-to-belly. Cool-looking sunset flip roll-up by Booker. Tony- "Was that a Steinerline for the ages, or what???" Seriously. More restholds are applied. Can't they just do the match without restholds, please. OK, here comes the finish. Clothesline! Rick fucks up a spinebuster! Ax kick! Face plant! Ref bump! Shit! Release German suplex, and Steiner covers! The ref is down! Thank god. Shane Douglas comes out to ringside. This is really good. He clocks Steiner, Book-End, three-count. I can't believe he wouldn't job clean. What a fuck. **

Steiner, retire. Oh wait, you're one of the guys who put WCW out of business so YOU WON'T HAVE TO!

Buff is punked out in the back. Luger cracks me up when he finds Animal at the scene of the crime. Luger- "My god, isn't that convenient?"

Recap of Jarrett/Flair v. Rhodes & Rhodes. That is so OBVIOUSLY Jeff Jarrett!

Jeff Jarrett & Ric Flair v. Dustin Rhodes & Dusty Rhodes. Time for the fourth tag match of the night. Flair and Dusty wear street clothes, thank god. I'm really glad that they fired Chris Ford and kept Animal, that was a good decision. I am bored out my ass with this match. It's basically a comedy match; I can't be bothered to type up the play-by-play. The heels work over the leg, and they do clichˇd spot after clichˇd spot. Welcome to the twenty-first century, guys. They hype how Rhodes v. Flair has never been on PPV before. Great. Finally Dustin ends the shit on an Oklahoma roll on Flair - which he blows. Uh, DUD. Dusty pulls down his pants and dumps a load of shit in Jarrett's face. Great.

Now they are going to have to rush the main event, you assholes.

DDP- "You're going to BANGTOWN!!!" DDP's Kids- "Dad, where is this bangtown and how are we getting there?" DDP- "Shut your traps while I fuck your mother. I'm still COMING!!!"

DDP v. Scott Steiner, WCW Title, Falls Count Anywhere. We start at 10:35, and the feud is recapped in a manner of thirty seconds. DDP hits an atomic drop and a swinging neckbreaker to start. Steiner knocks him to the apron, but DDP comes off the top with a flying clothesline. They brawl outside by the announce table. Insert Your Standard Brawling Sequence. Steiner pounds DDP stiffly on the apron, but DDP stunguns out. Steiner knocks him Bret-style to the rail, and they fight in the crowd. You can hear DDP gasping. DDP- "It's like Austin-Rock!!!" Steiner hits the douchebag with a trashcan. They find the Spanish announce table, for the first and last time on a WCW PPV. It's all set back and shit. Steiner breaks a crutch over DDP's back that he takes from a kid with a DDP shirt on. The kid throws DDP a crutch and he hits Steiner with it, following that up with an elbowdrop off the barricade, through a table, for two. DDP- "It's Foley-Rock!" DDP tosses Steiner on a piece of safety rail and hits him with a trashcan. Steiner pushes a fan and hits DDP with a breakaway record. Page retaliates in kind for two. D-D-P chant! Steinerline-elbowdrop and Steiner throws in the push-ups. Steiner works the back with stiff punches. DDP comes back, but takes a T-Bone suplex. 1, 2, no. Steiner is bleeding a dribble. Steiner applies the bearhug to rest, but DDP fights out, only to take a nasty overhead belly-to-belly for two. Steiner unleashes some cops, and the crowd is so into the match, they don't go WHOOO. Page makes the Rock style comeback with right hands. He takes ANOTHER belly-to-belly for two. Surfboard stretch from Scott to transition, and DDP is bleeding a tad himself. Steiner and Page fight over the turnbuckle. Page hits a DDT, double KO. Tony yells, "Who is gonna win this thing!?!?!?!?!" for the eighteenth time tonight. Discus clothesline, no cover. Punches, and the ten smacks to the turnbuckle hide the smile on Steiner's face. Steiner tries to Flair-pin DDP for two. Midair DDT for two from Page, but Steiner hits a lowblow and a DDT of his own. Steiner teases a tombstone, but DDP pushes out. Diamond Cutter, but Rick Steiner pulls the ref out, trying to appease the internet fans. It won't work, you motherless fuck. DDP unleashes plancha no. 7 on him for his troubles. Goldberg chant. DDP rolls Steiner up for two in the midst of all the confusion. Steiner applies the jawbreaker. Steiner applies the belt shot for two. Page has bladed a gusher. Steiner whips out a Boston Crab, and Page is bleeding like a regular horse. Page's blood is all over the ring. Steiner Recliner, and Page fights to ropes. Awesome. He has me cheering for him here. Page is dead, though, and he's jobbing. Steiner brutalizes Page with the lead pipe to the back. Steiner recliner, and the ref calls for the bell. I know what they were going for, and they didn't make it. Nevertheless, it was a great match. **** Steiner brothers put DDP out of commission after the fact. I wait for the surprise save or turn, but it never comes. Maybe Goldberg will show on Nitro as a farewell thing.

As as whole, this was a rocking show, not that it mattered. Nothing was bad except for the whole Rhodes-Jarrett-Flair debacle, but that paid off for the fans, at least. The cruisers steal the show, of course, but everyone else gave it a pretty good go, and the main event was better than expected.

Tommorrow is WCW's last show. (Except for next Monday's show. - CRZ) Maybe it'll do a nice rating that they can present to FOX.

Thumbs Up for Greed, not that it matters.

Alex Carnevale
[slash] wrestling

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