|Guest columnist: Roadsign
We open with ads for the July 24th show. Lol.
First match is Ashley Hudson w/New South Tag Partner, Corey Williams vs. Chris Michaels
Stalling to start. Oh so much stalling. Michaels does offense to start of, as the face. Hudson wants a test of strength with a foreign object in one hand, but Michaels doesn't do it, and he gives the object to Corey Williams before the ref finds it. They play, give it to me, I'll hide it, then give it back to you when ref looks for a minute or two. Hudson finally hits Michaels with it and kicks him, and then does a vertical suplex. Michaels manages to get on offense with a Thez Press, but Williams distracts the ref, Hudson nails a DDT. Hudson nails Michaels with the flag as WIlliams distracts the ref some more.
Winner:I couldn't fathom a guess, I think I read somewhere it went to a draw(why cut away?)
Rating:Dud, it was ok what they showed
They cut from the match for a interview with Jim Cornette(?). He covers the Taylor vs. Prentice situation, and Cornette is on Taylor's side, saying Prentice will have to talk to him about having 60 minutes of Taylor's valuable time, saying he wants no dq, no countout, no home-biased refs. He also says he wants the stip that if Colorado Kid looses to Taylor, he'll have to leave Nashville for a year. Also, if Kid looses, he can never again be the North American champion, but Taylor doesn't want it Cornette has a backdrop of a American flag with a eagle on it that says Ohio Valley Wrestling.
Next up, Prentice cuts a promo. Says Kid will have to put up everything he loves to do for this match. He says it in a few different ways, and recaps what Cornette said, and adds the Colorado Kid has accepted the challenge, and for Taylor to go on and bring Cornette, and the Kid might have a suprise of his own. He says he thinks Kid can take out Taylor, and reiteriates, AGAIN, what Cornette said, and that he accepts. Ok, Prentice, we get it. All the stips are on Taylor's side, everything is against the Colorado Kid. He also says he has a suprise for Nicole Bass from Jackie Fargo on August 7th. Gasp, hyping something that hasn't happened yet.
Ad for Summer Blast 99 on August 7th.
Interview with Prentice and Ernest T, who is doing weird hand motions. Prnetice asks for him to give directions to Lebanon for the fans. He says something bout Wal-Mart.and stuff. What a goofy gimmick. Funny sorta, but goofy.
25 minutes into the show, and I feel like I'm watching Nitro,cept it's not THAT bad. Even Ernest T is more entertaining than WCW. Ok, if you want to hate me for hating WCW, email me at email@example.com
We come back with some clips of Jackie Fargo w/Nicole Bass, who is not too young, vs. Jerry Lawler w/Stacy Carter. Stall. And more stall. And..stall. Ernest T has joined Prentice for commentary. Goodie. Fargo knocks Lawler to the mat with a test of strength. Ok, this match is probably about got the combination of age of a WCW PPV Main Event. ALMOST ANYHOW. Lawler says something about a oxygen tank and we continue to stall. Stacy hit Fargo. More stall. This is approaching WCW Level suckiness(ok,just the WCW Main Events). Lawler finally starts punching him, but Fargo starts to fire back with some nice looking punches. Oh boy, more STALL as Lawler heads outside. Ok, I'm going to stop calling the stalls and just call whenever a move happens. Lawler,with Stacey's help, gets in some punches. Ok, I'm tired of calling punches too. Stacy helps some more. Fargo hits the atomic drop, his finisher, but hurts his leg. Lawler is up before him. Stacey cheats until Fargo gets ahold of her and TAKES AHOLD OF HER JEANS AND PULLS THEM OFF!She's wearing a thong. This gets a few stars. But Bass turns on FARGO AND GIVES LAWLER SOMETHING! Fargo is knocked out and pinned. Stacy decides to pull up her pants in a few minutes, but not before we all get a few minutes of her derrire.
Rating:UMM..2 stars, it got heat at least, and the finish was ok
Fargo attacks Lawler and Bass post-match.
Candi Devine vs. Bambi(Hype for WNWA PPV August 29th)
They do some stuff. Ernest T's commentary is more entertaining, that says LOADS for this match. A small box appears in the corner with another female wrestler talking, but there is no sound but the announcers talking. Lol. Pretty funny. Ernest T hypes Lebanon and says ''Come see your favorite rassler!'' They do some snapmares and...stuff. Bambi wins, I missed how. Oh so sorry.
Chris Champion(with white facepaint) vs. Doug Gilbert
Champion has him in a headlock in the ring. Champion has on leather pants, long brown hair in pigtails, and facepaint I don't know. Gilbert gets out and runs the ropes, and nails a bodypress. Champion escapes and is choking Gilbert with tape off his wrist. Face announcer says it's choking, but Ernest T says ''he's just letting him rest!'' Oh My God, ERNEST T breaks kayfabe. Somewhere amongst this historic incident, Gilbert escapes and punches Champion, but Champion whips him into corner, but Gilbert NAILS A SUPERKICK. Some chick with Champion n facepaint is in ringside. Champion with what LOOKS like a swinging neckbreaker. Champion drops the knee, goes out and gets chair, but Gilbert stops him from using it, but Champion finally gets it with a WEAK ONE. Champion heads up top with the chair accross his head, but Gilbert gets up and nails Champion who is coming off the top with the chair, and gets the pin. Winner:Doug Gilbert
That's it for this week. Hope you dug.
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