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/19 February 2000

WWF Metal UK by Kirk Wagstaff




Welcome to WWF Metal! This week, only three matches! Six superstars! Two jobbers!

PRINCE ALBERT VS TIM PATTERSON. Prince Albert with a kick. Punch. Choke with the boot. Right. Right. Choke. Whip to the buckle. Misses a splash. Patterson counters with rights. Off the ropes - clothesline. On his second time round - Albert counters with a shoulder block. Albert with a slingshot. Misses a splash off the ropes. But Patterson can't get the whip. Choke by Albert. Stomps. Whip to the buckle. Aaaaaaahhhh spinning back suplex! 1... Albert won't finish it. Arm wrench. Eye gouge. Rope choke. Kick to the buckle. Choke. Chop. Another. Right. More rights. Whip to the buckle. Hey, get this, a splash connected! Oof! Pump kick! 1, 2, 3 (3:23)!

Grandmaster Sexaaaaaaay lost to Road Dogg this week after, GET THIS - Road Dogg executed a move other then a right hand. Pumphandle slam for the 3 count! Bah. Later on Scotty 2 Hotty pinned Mr Ass Sweet Billy G after Grandmaster Sexaaaaay intefered.

BIG BOSS MAN VS BILLY D. Headlock by Bossman. Shoulderblock off the ropes. Throw to the outside. Billy D gets back in. Rights in the corner by Bossman. Choke with the boot. Throw outside (again). Billy D gets back in. Bossman misses a clothesline - Billy D with his first offensive move - clothesline. Dropkick! Bossman soon gets the advantage with rights. Choke on the knee. Bodyslam. Billy D comes back with rights. Bossman with a right this time. Whip to the buckle. Misses a splash - surprise surprise! Shoulderblock sends Bossman down. Pick up. Off the ropes... walks STRAIGHT into a Bossman slam. 1, 2, 3 (3:50).

Aw diddums - Tori got hurt because of Cactus Jack. That guy is insane! Benoit beat the Rock with a bridging german suplex for the 1, 2, 3 in a reasonable bout. X Pac faced Kane in a hardcore match - with no ending bell in an appaling match. X Pac throws Paul Bearer and Kane in the DX Express. Later on other superstars to be thrown in the luggage compartment included Cactus Jack. Big Show threw the Rock in at the end of the show. DX leave in the DX Express after saying goodbye to Big Show, who is now on the street on his own. L - L - Look - he's behind you! "No he isn't!" Yes he is! "No he isn't!" WHACK with a 2x4. It split anyway - so it wasn't foam.

At No Way Out, Kane faces X Pac in the eighth PPV in a row.

CHESTBANGERS VS THE ACOLYTES. What's Mosh going to spout out this time? "Well, Acolytes, all the buzz in the locker room's about your so called protection agency. Well, WHOOP-A-DI-DO to your protection agency - hahahahahaahha. We think YOU SUCK! Hahahahahahahaha." Great. Acolytes are here. Double teaming from both parties at the start. Mosh gets whipped into the steps. Farooq works on Thrasher in the corner. Rights. Kick. Tag to Bradshaw. Kick. Right. Right. Kick. Whip. Mosh gets a BLIND TAG, Mosh catches Bradshaw with a clothesline. DOUBLE SUPLEX! 1...Mosh with rights. Whip reversed. Cross body by Mosh - caught in mid air. FALLAWAY SLAM! Farooq tagged in. Dominator - Mosh slips out. Thrasher off the ropes - hits a big boot. Tag to Bradshaw. CLOTHELINE FROM HELL. 1, 2, 3(2:23).

Hardcore Holly faced Tazz in a good match. Crash interferes, and he ends getting suplexed all over the ring. ECW! ECW! ECW! ECW!

WHAA! Three matches! Maybe there'll be more next week. This afternoon - Sunday Night Heat.

See you all next week!

Kirk Wagstaff
[slash] wrestling

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Guest column text copyright (C) 2000 by the individual author and used with permission