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WWF SmackDown! taping


by: Chuck Carlin


Ok, here's Smackdown results from the Springfield Civic Center in Springfield, MA. I won't say which side the Ovaltron was on, I don't want to ruin it. I also noticed that there are flashbulbs above the ring that go off when people do neat moves. Odd. There's also a big yellow net above the ring.

First was a dark match that saw Steve Bradley go over Tim Towers.


Headbangers v Greenwich Posse in a handicap match

Mosh was prevented from doing the Mosh Pit, and the Posse capitalized for a cheap win. Posse wins by pin.

Acolytes v Hollys in a No Holds Barred match

This was a really good NHB match that the crowd was pretty in to. Actually, the crowd was really in to just about the whole show. Bradshaw tried to take off referee Jim Korderas' belt, didn't get it all the way, so Bob Holly finished, whipping Brad with the belt. Crash bled like a stuck pig, so I don't really see this match getting on Heat, but we'll see. After a while, the Hollys just ran away into the crowd, leaving the Acolytes with the belts, the scale, and a lot of things to throw around. Acolytes win by count out.

Godfather (with ho's) v Blue Meanie

Godfather has new music with a LOT of bass, and Meanie has a REALLY REALLY funny new entrance video. I missed the entrance because I was just watching his video. This, of course, was a really quick squash after Meanie tried the Ho Train, Godfather said "Hey bitch, that's my move" and showed him how to do it right. Enter Pimp Drop, Meanie jobs honorably. Everybody parties with the ho's. Godfather wins by pin.

Shawn Stasiak v Midean

Actually, Midean's tights tell me that that "e" is actually a backwards "a". Guess that solves that mystery. This was the only match the crowed deemed worthy of a "You Suck" chant. Midean wins by pin.


Ok, we start with DX. I kinda missed the full opening for these guys. Crowd doesn't quite know how to react, a mix of boos and cheers. They all talk, nobody says any catch phrases though BECAUSE THEY'RE EVIL NOW. HHH calls out Vince and says that nWo, I mean DX is taking over. Vince gets some cheers by mentioning Springfield and yelling Suck It. That's all.

Edge and Christian v Too Much... er... Too Cool

Hollys come down for commentary with their scale. Crash has a scarf on his head to hide his newly red hair *wink, wink*. This means that now they can interfere by smacking Edge in the face with the scale so that he can be rolled up and pinned. Then everybody beats up Edge and Christian, with the Hardys nowhere to be seen. Too Cool wins by pin.

Jim Ross interviews The Big Show about what he's gonna do to the Bossman after he broke his little watch on Raw. Show just says he's going to leave so he doesn't do something he'll regret to the Bossman. Then he (Show) leaves.

Y2J Chris Jericho v Stevie Richards

Big pop for Jericho, and big pop for Richards, but only because he comes out as Chyna, and everyone thinks for a second that it's Chyna. Hey, Stevie's wearing chaps with no pants! Drink! Shit, tap a keg to get that picture out of your head. Eventually Chyna does come down with Chynette and hits Y2J with the IC belt, so Stevie rolls up Jericho for the pin. Then Y2J beats the shit out of Stevie. Stevie Richards wins by pin.

Hey, it's the Rock coming out of his car. Uh oh, it's the Road Dogg, and there's the full-on DX beat down. They stuff Rock into the trunk and Dogg drives away.

British Bulldog (with Greenwich Posse) v D' Lo Brown for the European Championship.

Well since Bulldog is FROM Europe... the Posse interferes so the Bulldog wins. Crowd is pissed, but not as much as D' Lo. Bulldog wins by pin.

X-Pac is explaining to Kane that this whole silly DX thing is just a side project, and that what they have is real, bro. Kane nods, kinda. Poor Kane.

Kane and X-Pac v The Dudley Boys

The Energy ad is back in X-Pac's intro movie, because he's a good guy at this moment. Not for long though, as Kane cleans house for like 10 minutes and tags in X-Pac. Pac punches each Dudley once, then tags Kane back in. When Kane turns around, Pac drops him with a golatta followed by the X-Factor. Buh Buh Ray pins him for the win. As Kane gets up, DX runs in and beats the hell out of Kane. Poor Kane. X-Pac informs Kane that he is sick of carrying his big ass around, and that Kane is not DX material. Dudley Boys win by pin.

Hardy Boys (with Terri) v Viscera and Mark Henry (with some nasty ho's)

This whole match pretty much goes like this: A Hardy does something really cool to either Mark or Viscera, but it has no effect because HE'S JUST TOO FAT. I know I ripped that off from someone, I just forgot whom. Maybe Scott Keith. Anyway, Terri distracts Mark so he can be set up for Jeff's senton bomb and the pin. Viscera is pissed and beats up Mark Henry. Hardy Boyz win by pin.

Big Bossman (with Prince Albert, without can) v Al Snow

This is a non-hardcore match. The crowd is so in to this match that they spur a "Shave Your Back" chant for Prince Albert. Albert distracts the ref so Bossman can pelt Al with his belt and pin him. After the match, Al Snow challenges the both of them to a match for the hardcore belt out in the parking lot later tonight. But we at the arena never get to see it, since it's pretaped. Big Bossman wins by pin.

Mankind v Val Venis

I liked this match, but Mankind just isn't getting the crowd response he deserves. Mick hits a double-arm DDT and goes for Socko, but he's gone! Mick panics and back pedals into a side Russian legsweep from Val, setting him up for the Money Shot. Mick dodges it, and Al Snow runs to ringside with Socko and gives him to Mick. Mandible Claw is applied, Val goes down, and ref counts a pin, which is odd since on Raw when Mankind did it to HHH, it was the three arm drops thing. Oh who knows. Mankind wins by pin.

Jerry Lawler gets into the ring, and none of the following is taped for the show, so here is an exclusive baby! Lawler says that the Braves are ahead of the Yankees 5-2 in the 7th. See, the crowd has been chanting "Yankees SUCK" all night, since this is a Red Sox town. I decided to keep my mouth shut, since I didn't want to die. Now Lawler is telling us that Mankind's book has hit the New York Times best-seller list, so here comes Mick to hawk his book at us. He reads the part about Socko. It's not really the best part of the book, but you know he couldn't read anything about WCW or ECW.

And now back to the show, as DX comes to the ring, and everyone looks pretty beat up except HHH. See, what we at the arena didn't see is that Austin has been setting little traps for the DX boys, a bear trap for Road Dogg, a snare for Mr. Ass, and a collapsing ceiling for X-Pac. HHH calls out Austin, and counts to 10. "1-2-3-4-(crowd counting along)-5-6-7-8-SHUT UP! I'M COUNTING HERE! Where was I? Oh ya. 9-10. Pussy" Ok, I'm pretty sure they won't let "Pussy" slip through. Oh, HERE comes Austin. Dx is all in the ring waiting for him, and Austin is standing out side the ring. Oh THAT'S why the net was above the ring, now it's dropping on DX. Hehe, ok, that's pretty funny. Austin starts kicking the hapless DX as HHH comes up behind Austin, but here comes Kane! Oh boy, everybody is getting beat up now, but the crowd is chanting (me too) for Rock-y! And there he is! So now Austin, Rock, and Kane have a finnisher-fest on the DX boys. Eventually, Austin get a six pack and throws Kane and Rocky some beer. They all have a nice toast as we go off the air.

But wait, there's more! Cameras are off, but HHH has a beer and a mic. He goes around apologizing to the fans and everyone for being a prick, and tells our heroes that he just wants to hand out with them. He throws Rocky a beer (he's already finished his first one) and goes around going "cheers" first with Kane, then Rock, then Austin. The crowd is running for the exits, but I am laughing my ass of and everyone is looking at me funny. Oh well. HHH takes a sip of beer and Austin kicks him in the gut, causing HHH to spew beer everywhere, and there's a Stunner. HHH bobs back up as if he were in the Royal Rumble and walks into a Rock Bottom. Again he bobs back up and walks into a Chokeslam, but it's a one handed chokeslam because Kane doesn't want to spill his beer! Now there's a real man. Our heroes leave one at a time, with DX still in the ring, covered in beer. HHH then gets up, mic still in hand and tells us that everyone is OK. I think it's funny, but nobody is paying attention. Oh well. He tells us that they have two words for us, and they leave. And I leave.

Where was Debra? Again.

Here's a contest for my reader(s). Name Jerry Lawler's theme song. Two hints for you: 1. You can listen to it in the Attitude game. 2. The title and Composer are Russian. Come on you guys, somebody HAS to know this.

Chuck Carlin
Master of the floatover DDT for
[slash] wrestling

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