WCW Worldwide by Mike Mousseau
Just so everyone knows, my new favorite wrestler is Kaz Hayashi. I just
thought I'd tell all of ya's before all
the internet jumps on the bandwagon. Also, good to see the Minnesota
Vikings lose again. God, they really
Hello everybody, and welcome to WCW Worldwide. Our studio announcers are Tony Schiavone and Larry Zbyszko. We begin by hyping Halloween Havoc, naturally, and Sid v. Goldberg. Next up, the return of the Outsiders. Let's go back to 4.10.99 Nitro, where security led Hall and Nash to their ringside seats. Bobby Heenan attempts an interview, and jokes are made.
Tony and Larry talk up the return of those guys some more, and then send us back to that one Nitro. Harlem Heat and Mean Gene chat a bit, but the First Family interrupts them rudely. Next up, there was a beatdown of sorts.
The First Family may be the next tag team champions, says Tony. Let's go to Interview #1: Okerlund hypes the Minneapolis Nitro on 1.11.99. Harlem Heat are the interviewees. Booker T says whatever happens on Nitro, he won't see it coming because he'll be too busy looking good. Stevie Ray talks some smack on Knobbs, Morrus and Jimmy Hart. 'S'bout it. Tony recaps the Sid/Goldberg mind games. Larry adds his thoughts. Back to Nitro we go, and I will not recap this. If you need refreshing on the happenings, check out CRZ's 4.10.99 Nitro recap. Thanks. It should be quite a match between Sid and Goldberg, according to Tony. Larry says it'll take more than a spear and a jackhammer to beat Sid Vicious.
Bret Hart and Chris Benoit wrestled a match in the memory of Owen Hart. Back we go (again) to Nitro, where 0:45 of action is shown, and a Hart interview concerning the bout airs. That interview was already on a Thunder!, right? No need to recap that, then. 'Cause I'm just plain lazy sometimes.
Here's the card so far for Halloween Havoc, on 24.10.99:
Return World Title Match: Sting v. Hulk Hogan United States Title Match: Sid Vicious v. Goldberg World Tag Team Title Match: Harlem Heat v. Hugh Morrus & Brian Knobbs (with Jimmy Hart) The Total Package (with Elizabeth) v. Bret HartThe duo hypes the World Title match a bit, and Halloween Havoc in general. Two new matches up next!
Tony and Larry ramble a bit about last week's matches and this week's matches, featuring Power Plant wrestlers.
Match#1: Jamie Howard v. Alan Funk (no relation) - Match announcers are Scott Hudson and Mike Tenay. Referee is Mickey J (on the small of her back). Worldwide is a showcase for the WCW up and coming talent, says Hudson. This is Howard's national television debut, but Funk has been appearing on WCW programming for the last month or so. There's the bell, and we're underway. Lockup, side headlock by Funk. Howard punches the side, and shrugs Funk off to the ropes. Howard down, stepover by Funk, leapfrog by Howard but Funk holds on to the ropes. Funk misses a right, Howard with the rear waistlock into a backwards double leg rollup for two. Howard with a side headlock takeover, Funk scissors him off. Kickout by Howard. Howard back to the side headlock. Tenay says Funk wants to be known as "Angry" Alan Funk. I suppose that makes him a heel, eh? Still working the headlock. Funk tilts him over for a one count. To the ropes, and Funk gets a kneelift in. Funk clubberin' away on Howard. Middle rope choke. Kick, and a knee dropped onto Howard's gut. Leg hooked for a one count. Howard is 22 years old, from Melbourne, Florida, and trained with Dean Malenko. Funk is in full control. To the corner, and knife edge chop from Funk. Another. Trade places, and two chops by Howard. Funk squashes that little flurry with the Stone Cold kneelift. Short whip into the corner, but a charging Funk eats das boot. Howard hops up to the middle rope, tries a tornado DDT, snuffed by Funk, so he hits the swinging neckbreaker. Right by Funk is ducked, boot to his gut, whip to the ropes, and a big back body drop by Howard. Spot call, whip to the ropes, nope, reversed, duck the right, head scissors attempt by Howard is turned intoan inverted powerbomb by Funk. Funk to the top, crotched. Never seen that one before. Top rope frankensteiner by Howard. Howard to the top now, and completely misses the sunset flip. Howard grabs the tights, and we get a glimpse of a black thong on Funk. Insert Buff fangirls' screams here. They finish the sunset flip attempt for one. I think that was the planned finish. Funk controls with rights. To the corner, Howard whipped across, and Funk eats das boot, again. Howard up top, and hits the sunset flip for the 1,2,3. (4:35) Our Wendy's replay of the week confirms what all smarties know: Don't repeat a botched spot.
Interview #2: Hype Nitro in Minneapolis first. Gene brings in Bret Hart. Bret says Nitro is a great place for him to make his point, that being wrestling is alive and living. It's alive in guys like him, Chris BENoit, Ric Flair, even Hollywood Hogan, Sting. You know, everybody is pumping blood about wrestling. Wrestling is alive in our veins. A few months ago he talked about quitting, but since then he's seen a difference in wrestling, a difference in the attitudes of the wrestling fans, and he is glad that he is back, he's glad that he's got something to prove, and he's looking forward to all kinds of conquests in the WCW on Nitro. Gene brings up baseball bats, and Hart talks down Sting and Lex Luger. Total Package who? By the way it's just WCW. No the necessary.
Match #2: Mike Sanders v. Kid Romeo - Sanders is 28 years old, from Atlanta. Romeo with some snazzy dancing on the ramp. Romeo in the ring, and Sanders rolls out. Lights out, and Romeo does some fancy stuff with neon-lit glowers. CRZ: "Did I just see Kid Romeo just pretend to be Steve Blackman?" Referee is Billy Silverman. Match is on. Lockup, and then an arm wringer by Romeo. Sanders punches out, and hits a European uppercut. Romeo whipped to the corner, Sanders with a monkey flip, Romeo lands on his feet, and he dropkicks Sanders. Romeo with a forearm and a kick. Sanders to the corner, no, reversed. Romeo does the spot I hate, where you lift up and wait for your opponent to run into the corner. Sanders stops short and grabs Romeo, but the Kid snaps off a head scissors takeover. Cover gets two. Forearm, to the ropes, reversed, Romeo ducks a right, kick to the gut, springs off the ropes, and a running kneelift to a bent-over Sanders' head. Get that? Romeo covers for two. Skip ahead a little to Sanders hitting a uranage on Romeo from the wheelbarrow poition. Pretty nice. How come CRZ spells it 'uranage,' while Netcop Scott Keith spells it 'urinage?' (Because I'm correct, while Keith has a golden shower fetish. Well, that's what I heard. - CRZ) Also 'enziguiri' v. 'enzuigiri.' (It's "enzuigiri" no matter how badly I garble the spelling in real-time. Okay, my last interruption tonight. - CRZ) I flip-flop because I just don't know. Sanders with a snap mare, knee to the face, and a knee drop on the face. Rear chinlock applied. Good mat wrestling for a sec by Sanders. Looks like he knows what he's doing. Sanders is in full control here. Romeo hits a running Liger Bomb, but doesn't hook the legs. Hudson correctly calls the move. Romeo with a nice sequence of moves on Sanders. There's a dropkick. Scoop and a slam. In case you didn't notice, there is no more bad cable for UPN 9. They've upped the output, I hear. No more Trix rabbit interference. Back to the match, and Romeo hits a sort of side Juvy driver. Sanders' head was to the side instead of between the legs. That's enough to get the pin for Kid Romeo. (3:47)
Larry and Tony hype the Sid/Goldberg mind games. And that's about it. End of show, and I'm Ghandi.
Mail the Author
Visit The Miscreant's Moor