Two Years Ago, Alex Beckers recapped Marc Taylor saw Kaientai punk out Bradshaw and challenge the Acolytes to a technical wrestling match - the Acolytes go along with it for a minute or two, but then just beat the crap out of TAKA and Funaki. Rakishi Fatu wins a squash (jobber named Tracy Smothers), Steve Blackman easily beats Mideon and Bubba Ray helps D-Von beat D'Lo in the battle of the D punctuation mark.

One day, I will learn how to tape Heat correctly. I look forward to that day.

TV 14LV apparently isn't high enough to let you see double middle fingers (:57)

you think if the alliance wins they'll put wrestlers in the Open? nah.

It's the Greensboro Coliseum Complex, oddly enough located in Greensboro, North Carolina, and it all comes down to this - well, the WWF show right after this. This one doesn't matter that much. It's HEAT! Live, sometimes, someplaces.

Your hosts are Al Snow and Michael Cole - there's never been a pay per view that was this important! The future is on the shoulders of ten men - Undertaker's future is so bright, he needs to wear shades. Don't forget, the title holders at the end of the night will have a job after tonight - so these two Unification matches are that much more important.  

Test/Edge recap package. It's nice that on a video package on Heat they ignore the match on Heat between the two that almost set this all up. (1:26)

Cole and Snow remind us about the jobs being kept, and then move on to his music. Hey, if Edge loses, we'll never have to hear this song again! Or see this concert footage. (1:23) Edge's stardom continues to rise - Al thinks that it's probably bugging Christian. Cole seems to agree. Here's that graphic again. Here's a reminder of that stipulation. Coming up later tonight - Justin Credible, Raven and Lance Storm take on Spike Dudley and S-Factor.

Crash Bandicoot RVD/Undertaker highlights of Last Monday. If Crash doesn't get in one these before they change them, it'll be a shame. 

This is WWFNY. They are not there. Mick Foley will be. Okay! Later, he'll complain about not being invited in the King of the Ring Tournament. 

If you have Direct TV, you probably can find something else to watch. Moving on, the Rock and Steve Austin sing their favorite hits of the seventies, eighties, and beyond. (3:52) "The tension is going to be even more unbearable" that doesn't sound right Cole. Al says you could cut the tension with a knife. Well, he almost does. Survivor Series means it's name or something. 

PS2 WWF Tag Team Change of Last Monday. Those were the WWF tag team titles, right? It's good I don't have to remember this anymore.

Let's push the crappy music.

Hey, since we just saw that bit, let's look at the cage and talk about that match. That kinda make sense. For the first time ever, they'll be in a cage. Also, that six pack challenge for the vacant Women's Title. The mystery person? Former champion Harvey Whippleman. Also, that ten man tag. Let's go back to Smackdown and listen to someone talk (4:12) Where does Tazz stand? Al says he'll stand for Tazz, like he always does. He'll also be in that big battle royale. Right as we go to break, Al sneaks in "I actually like Tazz now" and I have nothing to say.

Al and Cole hype shill shill hype

Coming up later, a six man tag to "set the mood."

Cole notices that Al's wearing a TE2 shirt and leads to talk about the tryouts and blah blah I'll have to recap this later so why bother now? Hardcore wears his t-shirt. Al calls Ivory not normal, which is normal. It'll be better than last year! It'll be different than last year! You haven't seen it all! You'll like it! At some point in the future (1:40) 

Al and Cole gab more about Tough Enough 2 but hey, it's Christian. "You know something, I'm standing in the back, minding my own business, when I hear Al Snow saying that he thinks I'm jealous of Edge. Let me tell you something, I'm not jealous of anyone, I'm the champion of Europe! You were the European Champion once, weren't you Al? What, for like a for a day?" "No, I think was champion for longer than what you've held that belt." "Yea, you know something? I feel sorry for those Tough Enough kids, you know that, I feel sorry for them. They're never going to succeed, because they're teacher, they're mentor, is the best loser in the World Wrestling Federation, Al Snow?" "Oh, is that so?" "Yea, that's so." "Let me tell you something Christian, if you think I'm such a loser, why don't you take your scrawny little ass, and that belt, and like a good friend of mine Mick Foley says, why don't you take it to the ring tonight, put it up against me, right here in [thumbs up] Greensboro, North Carolina! That is, if you got the guts." "I've got the guts. Give me about fifteen seconds to get ready." He walks off. As usual, Snow blames Cole for antagonizing people.

My Sacrifice (1:20)

Last Wednesday at WWFNY, Bill Gates and the Rock pretended to play the yet to be released Raw is War on the X-Box - that looked an awful lot like a replay while they were holding the controller.

Al's left, so let's go Back to Smackdown (3:49)

Scotty 2 Hotty, Albert & Spike Dudley vs Ad Break - Cole thanks the fans, in case this is the last Heat he gets to do, before sending it to our ringside commentators, Paul Heyman and Jim Ross. JR is quick to point out that this will be the last match they'll be together for, and Heyman seems equally happy. Scotty's antics scare Spike.

Scotty 2 Hotty, Albert & Spike Dudley vs Lance Storm, Raven & Justin Credible (partially shown entrance, w/Terri) - I guess Terri's so important that she can appear and disappear and only I notice. This may be the last time I ever get to ask "Why is Raven wearing that skirt, anyway?" Check out the ring crew guy checking out Terri's backside as he walks behind her. Spike and Raven will start, Raven pushes into the corner and with punches. Corner whip, Spike out with his head to the gut, head to the gut on Lance, head to the gut on Justin. Spike and Raven exchange rights, armbar by Spike and tag to Scotty, dancing kick. Armbar, punches in the corner, corner whip, reversed, rebound clothesline. I'll almost miss Raven, if the Alliance loses, only because of the paint by numbers matches. Tag to Justin, hold for a kick. Turnbuckle stomp. Corner kick down, boot choke. "C'mon you son of a " Justin censors himself, which is kinda lame. Pulling powerbomb? Of course. One two count? Of course. Slam. Second rope ax-handle meets boot and I think I've seen this match before. Hot tag time already - Albert and Lance get it. Albert with a right for Lance, right for Justin, right for Raven, whip for Lance, backdrop. Justin is thrown over the top rope. Scissors kick for Raven. Terri's on the, apron, so she gets a kiss (JR: "Maybe she got what she wanted"), and a press slam to Justin on the outside. Lance tries a whip, reversed, press slam into a powerbomb (JR: "right into the Baldo Bomb!") one two Raven breaks it up. Whip, reversed again, clothesline misses, Albert diving shoulderblock. Tag to Spike, who gets up on Albert's shoulders - super plancha to Lance on the floor. Raven and Justin try a double clothesline on Albert and it works, but Raven goes over as well. Justin takes a moment to pose - oh, there's the two handed bulldog. We don't even have time for a miss! W O R M woo woo woo who who who ha DDT! kick wham Dudley Dog! SUPERKICK! one two three (3:06) That was Lance with the SUPERKICK. Lance and Justin pose like they might have been tag team partners at one point. Here's a replay of the last couple wins. JR says it doesn't matter because it's not the main event and he may be right

One last time with the hype package. (3:08)